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god damn gophers! they have it in for us
Wasn’t that a groundhog?
Got no sound here at “work”, couldn’t hear his tiny little voice in order to differentiate…
South Park was right it a PANDEMIC!
I was so startled…
wait….. did i just saw a guinea-rabbit crossing my road?
No it was a chicken who was tired of the questioning looks
the anchor lady is pretty
The anchor lady has nothing on that smokin’ hot Rodney,
look at how he handles that film slate.
ITS A GOD DAMN HAMSTER!!! ARE YOU PEOPLE STUPID?
No, no, no. Its obviously a chicken that had undergone plastic
surgery to hide its identity.
ARE YOU BLIND?!?!?!
Its obviously a Iguana
Or a cricket.
a few more replys and were about to see this html fail.
YOUR COMMENTS SHOULD ALL BE LABELED AS FAIL! IT’S A
FREAKING WHALE! HOW CAN YOU NOT TELL?
Haha…Hamster, yeah right. It was the ever changing mechanical elf, with the slight hue of magenta.
RODney, the hamster, loool
Sounds like Molly Bi*sh
Omg that is the biggest Rofl since “double fail”
Don’t you just love lol-hackers
ARE YOU ILLITERATE?
It’s ‘an’ iguana.
man how stupid are you people? even i can see it’s a narwhal!!
I rofled so hard I choked on my beer
…while driving.
…while driving your hummer.
Actually, your beer was obviously wine that also had
undergone surgery.
Yes, they are, Cocoa_God. You’d think that domesticated animals would be easy to identify by now.
There’s always one. Always. lol
Actually, It’s a gerbil.
no it is Rodney Stanger he just is a hamster
“I’m…so…startled”
HOWWW COULD HE DO IT
A LITLE HAMSTER EHAUEHEUA
Lack of verb fail!
No, that’s a hamster, I think.
Yeah, but you’re insane
True, but that doesn’t make me wrong!
I feel really ashamed for laughing at that because it was juxtaposed with something so serious!
… But I still did! 
LOL
Just wait til your boyfriend kills you and a hamster is blamed. We will all laugh like you did Nancy.
I’ll be laughing when my “boyfriend” does too! LOL, but I still feel bad, I reaally do hope they find/found the girl… :-/
The first 48 hours are critical, then every 12 hours after that decreases your chances of recovering the person alive by 38%. That hamster is a wiley one.
Those statistics increase since it’s a hamster in questioning.
They are known to go underground and wait it out with their stores of food.
Maybe she’s being held in his cheeks of death!
are we sure its not a gila monster?
so after 2 days they have a 152% decreased chance at being alinve.
She was a childhood friend of mine… this news cast is from almost 10 years ago. They eventually found her body. They never found the guy who
did it, though. Sucks
They found her remains a couple years ago in the woods. I’m really glad this was taken down before I saw it. I knew Molly and I work with her parents on Child Protection Programs we put on in the area. I don’t care what was so funny on the video, its not a laughing matter.
First time anyone has ever used the word juxtaposed in a fail blog
comment…
An excellent point!
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
(sorry, I couldn’t resist)
Depart a lot at this time, and cut the approaching any more!
I fart in your general direction!
Methinks I need to see this Monty Python one day. I hate these references being over my head.
You mean you haven’t seen the Holy Grail?
Well done. You are uncontanimated.
I did when I was a kid. All I remember was the “Fart in your general direction” line, and the bunny skit.
It had fangs! And it flew!
Look at the bones!
Oh! Allow me. A new bukkit for monsieur.
*splorrtch*
Ze cleaning woman, maintenant. Would monsieur care for an aperitif or would he prefer to order straight away?
When you’re walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don’t come crying to me!
It’s just a…..WAFER-THIN mint!
he’s got a wife you know…
you know what she’s called?
she’s called incontinentia
incontinentia buttocks
*Takes offence*
Oh, I’m sorry, did someone get touchy with the satire in my post?
*Takes a fence*
*Took a tense.*
*Takes defence*
Holds on to the gate.
*swings gate*
Crap I’m Late!
Perambulate!
Don’t hesitate!!!
Why wait?
*fakes good sense*
*lights incense*
It’s rather dense…
… No Masterbate after that Perambulate? Wow. Something MUST be wrong.
-e +u
*wrists*
…
*masturbate*
Stop, Perambulate and listen.
Master bait?
It’s merely a flesh wound. Only a flesh wound.
You do realize that by farting and it sounding like “pwah” instead of pfffffffft it is a telltale sign of your alternative lifestyle, right?
Means you aint a virgin now more and if you’re not careful I have heard you could accidentally crap your pants.
Also, if you fart and it sounds like “plop!” that’s a telltale sign of your date with the vicar.
We are the knights who say “NI!”
Oh, and:
“And so they were forced to eat Robin’s minstrels. And there was much rejoicing.”
Don’t forget Killer Rabbit (distant relation to Rodney Stanger.)
NO NO NO
Yes, Hamster.
I could go for some VA Ham….
It’s a HAMSTER!!!!! Not a groundhog or gopher.
That’s actually a hampster
What we all want to know … did he see his shadow today?
HAMSTER IM TELLING U IT IS A HAMSTER
HAMSTER
Fail.
It’s a hamster.
Nope.. Hampster.. What’s worse, I live in Connecticut, that story was on WFSB, and I missed it!
Its a hamster
looks like a hamster. hahaha!!! im not using proper punctuation or capitalization!!!!
AL iz Nawt sekund! [/ICHC spam]
Don’t retaliate against the gophers. Remember CADDYSHACK.
thats not a gopher its a hamster!!!
REMEMBER CADDYSHACK? Gophers are deceitful.
god damn gerbils! they are in us!
You must become one with the gerbil inside, Grasshopper.
HAVENT U SEEN A HAMSTER BEFORE
Skwerlly Bob, was that you???
That was his accomplice, Hamster Sam.
He’s not “accomplice” but just barely an “acquaintance” of mine.
His name is Hamster Sammy, AKA “The Nut Job”
But he didn’t do it, he’s a old professional Nut Thief.
He’s doing time for Hacking http://www. kettleofnuts . com
and getting tons of free roasted nuts delivered to his hideout.
Hope they,re from that Georgia plant
*sigh* Bukkit please
*ducks head into bukkit*
What’s in the bukkit today?
*peers*
Oh good god…I feel sick.
*runs out of room*
sorry forgot to clean that out after the fishing trip
*removes Spam* Umm…yeah, sorry.
Heh. That was my first thought….
Hm… He is no where to be seen… >.> <..> >.< Crap! He put on a hamster disguise! Oh noes!!! :-0
I knew the hamsters were evil! This just proves it.
Once a hamster made me bleed because of a bite. I almost died from the blood loss. Now I am the president of a foundation against Hamsters as pets.
People interested in donation ($10.000,00 minimum) can contact me: nigerianfraudwithhamsters@scam.com
Dearest Sir/Lady;
Praise the heavens we have reached you! Due to a horrible accident dealing with h’orderves in a Nigerian piano bar, the last known Nigerian Ring Tailed Hamster, Sam, has died. We greive with on your losses of our friend mutual.
Mr. Sam Hamster left an estate of 87¢, which has been unclaimed for 3 days. Since you alone are the only person in the entire world we could find to contact and expect to be stupid enough to keep reading, if you send us every bit of your personal and financial information and your checkbook, we will name you as Sam’s only heir. There will be a slight charge of $US 4,001.03, but can suck that out of your account later. Time is at the utmost hurry and quickly respond before our time is up here at this internet kiosk at the bus station.
Best of Regaurds, Honorabble Barrister Samuel L. Jackson, Esq. III, LLC.
$10 minimum?
In Europe they use , and . for the opposite designations that we in the US do, at least when it comes to money.
I knew the French do that, ’cause I’m Canadian, but I didn’t know the rest of Europe did too.
Ah, well, the Spanish do as well, at least.
Yeah, but they do it in their little cages.
Oh. Wait. That’s the hamsters.
The Spanish have much larger cages.
But it’s a bitch to list decimal numbers that way. >.<
Goodgawdamighty! almost first!!!
LOLz
i want buttsecks
Buttsocks?
you love socks in your butt huh?
He’s 15, chill already.
done and done… only for you ryannon.
Wait, only ryannon can compel you to stop sexually harassing a 15-year-old boy? Are you a hamster, perhaps?
I don’t believe it! You already tamed this troll, Ryannon?
Hey, who left this whip and these cuffs here?
Botsocks? Like for robot hamsters?
Batsocks? Like for the flying rodents?
Bytesocks? Like for computer programmers?
Fightsocks? Like for boxers?
Kitesocks? Like for windsport enthusiasts?
Bitesocks? Like for vampires?
plightsocks? like for indecent trolls?
Mightsocks? Like for Governators?
Writesocks? Like for authors?
Litesocks? Like for dieting shoes?
Botsocks? Like for celebrities with wrinkles?
Pealsocks? Like for bell-ringers?
Hotsocks? Like for firewalkers?
Rotsocks? Like for necrophi… I’ll not go there
Shotsocks? Like for bartenders?
Socksocks? For like sockin’ it to ya.
Totsocks? Like for little ones?
Notsocks? For going barefoot
Blobsocks? Like for those inexplicable bulges.
Bobbysocks? Like for sock hops?
Hobbysocks? Like for leisure time?
Hopsocks? Like for brewing beer?
Copsocks! For nabbing bootleggers!
Clogsocks? Like for bringing in the cattle?
Fogsocks: Because the fog comes in on little cat feet…
Gagsocks? For all those “special” times?
Scotchsocks? Make it Suntory times.
Frogsocks? Like for amphibians?
Jogsocks, like for the morning run?
Hogsocks, to wear while eating bacon?
Dogsocks, because their little feet get cold too?
Bodsocks, for when you’re feeling sheepish.
Wabbitsocks, for when you’re being vewy vewy qwiet.
Codsocks – for when things seem fishy.
Modsocks vs Rockersocks = Quadrophenia?
Fuddsocks, for when you’re being vewy vewy qwiet.
AclockWorkSock – for my Droogs.
Cocksocks? Naaaahhh – not gonna do it, just not. And nobody else should either. I’m looking at you Ry.
Nutsocks, for those chilly afternoons
Fapsocks? like when you don’t have the right tools?
Fapsocks? for when you just have to do this.
Broken.
Podsocks, for the music idiot?
Podsocks, for insane music idiots?
Cocksocks? – like for protection?
failsocks
The first rule about Fightsocks is – you do not talk about Fightsocks.
BOGsocks for Bog Enthusiasts! Yeah!
Logsocks for when well your fart takes a more–er–substantial form.
I always flush my substantials.
Beausocks?
Beau Geste?
Beau Brummel…uh, with socks. *I suck at this*
“Beausucks.” For Norm.
Thanks, Judy.
Go ask ‘mr. sausage’, and leave me the hell alone. *scootching away quietly*
ahem…my name is mr. cuddles…not mr. sausage, but i could see how you’d confuse the two.
Why on earth would you give out your real last name on here Mr. Cuddles? now your going to have to watch your checking account reeeeeally close.
oh it’s ok, i already sent in my credit card number and copy of my signature to keep a look out for fraud on my account.
*Sings*
“Shoulda gone to freee credit report dot com!”
I luvs to cuddle a sausage…..with peppers.
I want knusperkeks
try a Luftwaffle from the WaffleSS
South Park was right!
Those were guinea pigs on South Park. The kidnapper shown in this video is a hampster.
There is a diffrence between the two… come on people!
Next thing you’re saying they should have their own schools.
I hate all rodents equally.
Damn retardents!
I feel you on that one B2th.
I especially hate the flying cockamouse…those things are crazy!
Or it’s close relative, cockinmouth? I don’t mind that one, especially the ones that hiss.
Are they relatives of dickinhand and a pussinthebush?
That episode nearly killed me! We have those here in Chi-town too. In the more skeezy neighborhoods.
I balled my eyes out when they threw it out the window and they were amazed that it could fly…until it came back for them.
You WHAT!!??
Hey, Avis, you see that distraction over there?
*Smooches*
Mmmmm… what was I talking about?
Yes, Avis. Forget all about mr. cuddle’s lunacy right now and go stare at the shiny object with Skwerlly Bob.
ooo is purdy
NOOO ADLS!
(Attention Deficit Look Shiney)
*prefers to stare at Christopher*
*stares appreciatively*
*stares at Christopher*
Wait, he’s not shiny!
*appreciates cookies*
*munch munch*
…boggles the mind…
….moggles the bind….
…moddles the bing?
No, mingles the bod. Try to keep up, Hammy.
He no rat – he hamster!
You can identify the hampster; he’s the one that climbs on the outside of the wheel.
Is that akin to thinking outside the box?
Don’t let me slow you down.
My wheel’s turning, but the hampster died
He was severely hampered.
I’m looking at you, Diana.
Yes, well, hammykins, after this shocking news story we’re all looking at you – ROD STRANGER in disguise!!
Lies. All of them, lies! You can tell by the ears that Stanger is clearly a hamster, not a fox.
A pox on that not-fox!
Mockfoxsocks… for hamsters impersonating foxes.
Damn you and your avatar-changing skills!
Oh my.
“Oh, I’m – oh, what? Well, I’ve –oh.” “What is it, Sebastian? I’m arranging matches.” “Well, I..I thought you – … I’d better go.” “Yes, I think you’d better had.”
Ohhh noooo!!! Now that hamster will have his reputation spoiled forever!
No chit – after showing up here…
Chit can refer to:
* Awareness in various schools of Indian philosophy
* Chit (board wargames), a type of wargame counter
* Chit Fund, a kind of savings scheme practiced in India
* Voucher, a certificate with monetary value
* Chit (note) or chitty (note), a small note such as a sickness note, from Hindi ’small piece’
* Chit (child), a small child or girl (probably from above)
* Chit (potato seeds), a method of crop preparation
Did Rodney see his shadow?
Rod Stanger… sounds like a good porn name.
Poopster… not so much.
Rod looked good for 60. He’s really been taking care of himself.
Unless there was a cup and 2 women involved…
(Never seen it, but those who have are now reliving that infamous vid)
*evil smile*
Ha! I missed the vid, but did see a cartoon rendition, and THAT was plenty. Of course that guy and two Barbie dolls was just pitiful.
Rats!
Why did they have that picture on file in the first place?
Guess it was a placeholder. They should have used geometrical patterns.
Or a picture of Albert Einstein. Google ‘Rodney Stanger’ image.
lolwut
He only failed if he din’t see his shadow on a sunny day!
Oh no, he din’t!
In other news, Mayor Michael Bloomsberg was bitten by a groundhog today.
No s!
Link please!
Mugshot fail.
Recovery win.
Ha! Ol’ Rodney’s real mugshot is even funnier than the hampster. Einstein is back!
That looks like fluffy… When Mom said he ran away I though she meant he died…
That’s not Fluffy. Fluffy is all golden and fishy-like.
Nah its not fluffy. It’s Hammywinks
*gasp* You’re right! It DOES look like hammykins!
Could… could it be? But… how? I’m so confused!
I am so very startled! :O
fisrt
Fial.
Looks like they finally randomized publishing times. Now everybody will be refreshing every minute of the day.
I don’t know about you but I feel refreshed.
Well, after the last fail: yes.
I love the clapboard. Damn hamsters making dirty movies with 16-year old lifeguards.
‘Hamsters making love with 16 year old dirty lifeguards’: The Movie.
*clapboard*
Take 1
oh noes she’s been rapped by an hamster ;_;
The hamster has experience, then.
The face of a killer. Seriously. somehow this was expected…
Hamtaro strikes again
OMG! They have implicated one of Skwerly Bob’s relatives!
Oooooo, just cuz he gots fur, you call him a relative?
[Skwerls can play this game too!]
So, human, Princess Nancy is your brother?
Bob, he didn’t say how close your relation to him was. You might be 175th cousins. *waves her keychain* SHINY SHINY!
Skwerly I like ya man, dude, skwerl, but you have to face facts. Your considered a rodent, hamsters are rodents too, therefore you relatives. Princess Nancy may be my brother, that might explain all that lipstick I keep finding and he is always saying its his girlfriends.
ARG GRAMMAR!
You’re a little old to be crying for your gramma aren’t you?
And while humans, marmasets and baboons may be considered of teh order primate, I’d hardly call them family. Though taxonomically…
must look away from shiny… must focus…
focus failing….
eyes drawn…..
RESISTANCE IS FUTILE
I HAVE BEEN ASSIMILATED
*gently brings her dangling keychain to stillness* You will now feel the uncontrollable urge to hurl all Fail Blog trolls into the FAIL BOG. When I snap my fingers, you will remember nothing beyond this troll-drowning imperative. That is all. *snaps fingers*
diana, you are insane!
I thinks I lubs ya!
Gettin’ kinda fonda the woman myself…
Aw, you guys are so sweet. Cookies for everybody!
*spreads out platters of ThinMints® and Tagalongs®*
Btw, Bob, don’t think I don’t know that part of the reason for your “lub” is that I just gave you a source for a whole new truckload of FAIL BOG troll inhabitants.
mmmmmmm………baked sugary goodness…….
And it’s not available in stores!
Oh wait.
Maybe it is.
Tagalongs have 0 grams of trans fat, you know.
I’m really fond of the shortbread cookies, myself. With a cup ‘o tea – ah! Sweet pleasures!
Oh, they’re loaded with trans fats. I’m sure that’s why they taste so good.
Next weekend it’s sugar cookies with lavender icing!
It was supposed to be this past weekend, but things got in the way.
I’ve never tried lavender in any recipe. How does it taste, A?
I’ve used it in a chicken dish, it’s good. But it only takes a very small amount. Too much and it’ll taste like soap. At least that’s what I think. I have never made these cookies before, and I’m kinda making up the recipe on my own. So I’ll have to let you know how they turn out.
Will you post it on your site?
Yes, even if they don’t turn out. If they don’t turn out they’ll be a warning. If they do turn out, they’ll be a great story.
I think they’ll turn out fantastically. Stay tuned.
Looking forward to nom, nom, nom. Wait – who said that? There’s no lolspeak on this site! AWAY! AWAY WITH THAT KIND OF TALK!
Phew! That was close!
Yep thats the one that did it, i can tell by his shifty eyes… and hamster like features.
Hahaha!
It’s Spiny Norman’s half-brother.
Are we sure it’s not his more-than-half brother?
Rodney Steger is the cutest kidnapper I’ve ever seen.
I think it _was_ him. Did you see the beady little eyes?
Dinsdale!
Funniest video in a loooooooooooooooong time!
disgruntled intern win!
IAWTC ^_^
*dramatic gopher look*
du-duu-duuuuuuu
Click my name!
It doesn’t work.
I’d rather watch Happy Tree Friends anyway.
The link didn’t work.
Happy Tree Friends is disturbing
That is hysterical!
The link works fine for me, but sometimes YouTube can be capricious.
And BFF, I almost sprayed diet coke all over my laptop (through my nose, mind you) after reading the threads on the last fail. Thank you, but Dragon’s got me beat by a longshot.
Thanks for the compliments. I do my best to battle out the trolls that lurk. you’re an idiot was a complete and utter bastard. He insulted me every which way.
I forget sometimes that you are as young as you are. You hold your own here just as well as anyone else. And you are far and away more intelligent than the trolls that come through here. We come to your defense because we don’t like to see a friend get picked on.
I love the way the Failblog community never dies. No matter how many times we are pushed to our limits by trolls, we never give up. Failblog is truly one of few last outposts against trolls.
I never beat Avis! It’s a lie! It was more of a love tap! A friendly *squeeze*! A…a…..
…what were were talking about again? Anyway, NO one undervalues my friends. Including my friends.
*GROUP HUG*
And for the record, I do believe it was a “goose”!
*grins*
Oh, that’s right. I remember now.
*GOOSE!*
Hey! No fair! I can’t goose you, as someone will get FOOMed by the resultant gout of fire!
Heeheehee…
Diabolical, aren’t I?
*vows to come up with something!*
*is trying to shake the image of a startled dragon from head*
*is failing*
Hey! Careful, don’t squish me!
*{{{{{HUGS}}}}}*
*grabs SB by the collar and leads him away*
Don’t go places where you are uninvited.
Agreed. Please ask first, Skwerlly.
*pats on head, hands over cookie, and sends on way*
*DEJECTEDLY CRIES*
*puts “CLOSED FOREVER” sign on FAIL BOG*
*[thinks,
"I wonder how many Thin Mints it takes to kill a skwerl?"
/thinks]*
*MUNCH, MUNCH, MUNCH, MUNCH…*
BYE
NOOO!!! SKWERLYY!!!
*snatches the mints*
Bob, no! You must maintain the BOG! We need you and your little skwerlly cuteness. Have a cookie.
With all due respect, it appears to me, Honorable Admiral, that SB was commenting in response to Avis’ “group hug” request. Why, then, do you deem him uninvited and a candidate for being ousted?
It’s kind of a long, complicated story. I’m not sure it can be expressed here.
Because, dear Judy, he knows exactly how Avis would respond to being hugged by SB. The Admiral did him a favor…Avis would have set her flock of birds on him.
The rocs. Not the finches.
It seems I spoke without knowing the history. I beg forgiveness. I’ve made a loaf of nut bread today, can I offer some in penance? I also have spreadable cream cheese.
Oooh, YUM!
*hug!*
My reply didn’t post. Color me penitent.
P.S.: I didn’t get the “goose” reference, either.
A couple of fails ago Dragon goosed me. And what is this about nut bread?
Yes, I’ve made nut bread. Although I do cook from scratch usually, this was from a box mix, Avis. But I did toast extra walnuts in the oven to mix in. Nummy, have some?
Oh, yes please!
*smushes a slice of nut bread, spread with cream cheese, into the D: drive*
Didja get it? It should still be warm, I’ve had my ‘puter on for a while.
Mmmmmm… thank you! My computer has also been on for
awhile.So it’s nice and toasty!
*cropdusts the group hug.*
Looking back BFF, you got a bit too worked up over that A$$Wipe Troll.
=He just baits you irritating words and waits for you to try to refute his comments with your long logical defensive statements. Your’s is the exact response he seeks.
=Never respond directly to the Troll, rather discuss and cut (if you must) indirectly while speaking to a friend. Saying something like, “Troll-X is an immmature A$$wipe just like Troll-ZZ was! Remember that fool?”
=Even mentioning their name or existence gives them the “power” they seek. If they can’t provoke you then they have no fun and go away. Either ignore ‘em or just use short quick blunt replies.
You did well, you can do better. Have a cookie!
I understand all.
What was I thinking? Of course! He was waiting to annoy me!
From now on, however many times he insults me, he shall be met with silence.
Good Luck! Anyone who has a sibling (older or younger, not much difference aside from style) can tell you that annoying is what they do best… As an older brother, I prefer to use logic to confound and fight with my sisters, as they often niether have the patience, nor the book learning to properly exchange ideas. My moody 16 year old sister especially is annoyed. The younger 13 year old is esaier to debate with.
I prefer to handle annoyances with a sharp back hand. Alas, I’m unable to reach you’re an idiot.
So far I’m finding a refusal to acknowledge the existence of troublesome beings to work very well.
I’ll try that. Here, as well as in daily life. Although one sharp back hand is usually all it takes.
I find the “door in the face” really pisses them off. Best used while they are in the middle of a sentence.
Holy carp! That explains why my posts are seldom responded to! Huh.
That was really funny.
Sorry about the lack of wit and humor on this post. Ill make it up you guys with some good lovin.
Oh my, if only that empty promise had not been made many times before you
Ok I promise to make good
You need to switch back to thongs though, they are hotter than boyshorts.
Pfff you haven’t seen the right ass in the right boyshorts. No thong necessary.
*totally agrees*
*firmly agrees*
Someone’s sense of humor just got them fired.
Mayhap.
I don’t know what is more frightening about this. The fact it was a creepy disgusting disease infested perverted rodent that did the kidnapping or the names of the two. Rodney Stanger and Molly Bish?
Rodney’s wanger smells like Molly’s fish?
Rodney banged her in Molly’s dish?
Holy crap I know him!
I thought this guy was a producer for hamster porn.
oh, how proud i am to be a connecticut resident! *facepalm*
Asdgfadgfdgfasgfadoneone11111!!!oWnedhundredandeleven!
How did it come to be?
ZOMG i live right near Warren. But to bad Warren is in Rhode Island NOT MA
There is a Warren, MA… you’re not totally special.
Hey I know that guy.
And here I thought the “Bish” part was the fail. Then I saw the hamstr.
Ugh. Well, apparently I’ve contracted the flu. Not sure how long it’s going to last, but I won’t be commenting for a while. Even a short time on the computer makes my eyes start to burn.
Be well, everyone…
Aww.
*sends spork some soup and a hot Toddy*
(He should be able to fetch and carry for you while you’re sick.
)
Get well soon, Ti.
…wipes monitor over spork’s comment with alcohol wipe…
Get well!!
Sleep. Sleep always helps me. And really really hot showers.
Feel better soon!
Hey snap!
I was fine until about 5pm today. Now I’m aching all over 
My first week back at uni too! *hugs spork*
Boy I sure hope this FB isn’t contagious. *hugs Loz and Spork*
Loz, do you go to a highbrow uni? Is it, in fact…a high uni-brow?
))))))):[
Now that is one high unibrow… What do you major in?
It looks like it was architecture.
Why yes, dragon, it’s incredibly high uni-brow!
In fact, they measure the height of your uni-brow as part of the admissions procedure.
Aww, after your comment yesterday, I was hoping you were on the mend. *Sends healing hugs*
Feel better, spork.
Oh, Loz, not you, too? *healing hugs* to you as well!
Thanks, all! I feel better – well, enough to glance at all the insanity. I’m hoping it’ll be gone by morning.
*hugs all back* Don’t worry, I disinfected myself beforehand…
Sorry, sweets. The insanity is chronic and incurable.
Accept the insanity, be as one with it and you will be happy and complete.
APPREHENDED: http://flickr.com/photos/joffley/2414120482/
Doesn’t look so vicious now does he? Probably some guinea pig made him his bitch.
DAM NUTJOBS!!
I’m pretty sure not all dam builders are maniacs.
Oh Bish Please!
I swear gophers can kill people.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH
Your father trod on a hamster.
He murdered his girlfriend because she was going to eat the babies.
His girlfriend is a dingo?
Well even though she was blond, that’s no reason to assume that she’s not so smart.
At first I thought the fail was because the reporter sounded like she said “b*tch” -__-;;
I have been looking at failblog for weeks, and I have never seen anything that prompted me to comment. This was the funniest thing I have seen in like months.
“Like months”? Are the ones that all have 30 days or 31 days? And what about the other months? Do you have a schedule that you laugh only in certain months? What happens if someone days a horrifically funny death and it happens in the wrong month? Do you have to wait for the next month to laugh or do you miss your chance altogether and have to wait for the next death? This is a very curious concept for me and I need to know more about this “like months” thing.
I like months too. But only certain ones. Those summer ones are really cool,
but I’m not so much liking the winter ones.
Connecticut News for the WIN
Rodents, stealing all teh white women… I KNEW IT!
I’m going to blame my dating “dry spell” on this; as obviously the problem is the danged rodents stealing all the available women.
Rickson by armbar!!!!!!!!!!!
Yayyyyyyy!!!!
…oh gawd.
But it’s fake! Hamsters with movie clapboard photos are the oldest joke in the book!!
ARMBAR! ARMBAR!!
It’s okay, dilly. I love you anyway.
Aw! I love you, too. Thanks for forgiving my bizarrely photographic memory for the halcyon days of my Failblog youth. Those were heady times.
I love you! And I mean it this time. (saw that in a commercial)
So…so you don’t really mean it this time? *cries*
*pat pat pat*
I’d pat that.
That reply was a little too pat.
Aye, there’s the rub!
Upon the contented waves he kept, and oar’d
himself with his good arms in lusty stroke
damn evil hamster that is! lolz and old too!
That thing’s worse than Son of Sam’s dog. At least the dog was just making a polite suggestion.
That is hamster which fell from Richard Gere’s ass
Greetings from Six-Burgh!
(Sorry, had to do it. I’ll quit now)
Especially since I already switched my avatar.
At least she recognized that that wasn’t the suspect, unlike the guy who thought that a moth was a horse.
Why in the hell did you divide by zero??!? Oh god. The continuum…
Quick…multiply pi times e! It’s the only way to stop it!
OMFG.. Megafail
Was NOBODY going to make a gerbiling joke? really?
cause if you did, I wasn’t gonna read the 400 comments before mine.
That’s truly excellent.
Warlocks of Metal New songs up!
http://www.myspace.com/warlocksofmetal
And now… so’s my lunch.
very funny!! the news readers recovered quite well!
That was so awesome!!!!! Best fail ever
A shifty looking character INDEED!!!
Hamster namecalling for teh win!! Won’t somebody please think of the children?!?!
in soviet russia, Hamster eats you…
What an unfortunate last name lol.
LOL!!!!!! XD
almost as funny as mascot fail
why the hell does the hamster have one of those film things?
To let the rabbit behind the camera know when to start rolling. God, do you know nothing about film making?
And it’s called a clapperboard, not “one of those film things.”
I feel bad 4 laughing
Wow, the anchor played it cool. Darn funny!
Haha poor kara sundlund
I’ve seen that hamster in the city – if only i had known
Fucking Hamsters.
I feel so horrible that I’m laughing at this.
this may top the dramatic “chipmunk”
you people are insensitive for making jokes about a girl who was killed. one of my close friends was killed in 9th grade and all of these jokes sicken me. show some respect for the girl’s memory.
Maybe Failblog.org is not cup of tea. Or maybe you have experience something in the past which has traumatized you? Did it involved an alleged hamster?
i love failblog, however i just dont like jokes about something like this because someone was killed by another person. this was someones child you insensitive asshole. Show some respect for the prson that died.
Dude…chill…We’re not making fun of the girl…Showing disrespect to her would be saying mean things about *her*. We’re only making fun of the hamster…
Really…chill…
I’m impressed by how the news anchor managed to stifle her laughter. Cool.
Mr. Fuffles! How could you?!
…I’ll never trust hamsters again, as long as I live…
*wipes tear from eye* that is a WIN in so many levels. too bad it wasnt fox though.
god damn gophers! they have it in for us
Wasn’t that a groundhog?
IT’S A FUCKIN HAMSTER YOU RETARDS.
well, if you think about it, the guy that did this is a rodent, and rodents need to be caught.
she surely got fired
same here lmao
2 Fails, her last name sounds like Bitch, and the mughshot xD
she was first.
What if this was hampster news? Would a mug shot of a person mess with their minds as much??
OMG LOOOOL BUGSY!!!
Whoever posted this should be ashamed of themselves. I’m glad it’s not working, I live in the town this happened and I knew Molly. I hope someday you have a loved one die and someone makes fun of it on the internet.
Emily,
I think the point has already been made clear that the focus of our witty antics are not on the girl, but on the hamster. If this post offends you, you have every right to not visit the web page.
So not only is some guy with one letter off from my name a murderer…
but the news show failed.
This is my name… people.
I don’t recognize this guy… Everyone with my name I thought had to be somewhat immediate family… Maybe that’s a good thing though :S
Maybe it’s the one letter off thing…?
HAHAHA omg that is the news station i watch every morning. they have so many little mess ups like that
hahahaha!
lol i am so geting a hamster and nameing it that lmao
she’s hot