u shouldve seeen by the look n my eyes baaahaybey BUH…there was sumthing missahhhhhnnnhg…BAH BUH
U shouldve known by the tone o my voice MAYAAAbey duh …but u didn’t listeeehehnnn…..BUH BUUh
ah You played Dead…
But ya never bledd
…instead u lay
still
in the grass,
alll coiled and Hiiiissssiiaahhhnnnng
u know i know all about those meheehheennn …
still i dont remember DUH BAH
cuz it was us baby wayyyy b4 thehehmmmm
and were still togeteher….BUH BUH
and i meant
every word i said,
WHEN i said that
ilove UUU imeant,
that i love u 4 ehhhhhhhverRRRrr
n ima gonna keep in luvin uuuuuuuYuu
cuz itx the only thin i waan d doooohhhoooo
i dont wanna sleep i just wanna keep oon luvvingggu UUOOH
Cows are just Vegetable By-Products.
Cows eat grass/hay/grain, (all vegetable matter).
Cows grow and produce milk and meat from the veggies they eat. So, if you’re eating meat or dairy you’re just eating vegetables transformed into another form. Plus, steak taste Much Better than Hay!
In my younger days, I could knock off any person’s hat with my erection from 5 yards away. Nowadays, I have to stand a bit closer. Waning eyesight, you know.
My Yard is 110′ wide x 200′ deep. So even using the narrower distance, you’re saying you could “knock off any person’s hat” from 550 Feet away! The longest throw for a baseball is 445 Feet! Even if your erection was detachable, why would you even try to do this?
Triple win for JasonK
1- Not being a shameless troll
2- Being funny, hilarious, humorous and brilliat
3- Guessing Mookie’s gender
Now go to rolfrazzi page to get your prize.
Good, he’s clearly talking about Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin.
“Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you who you are.”
Japanese Iron Chef quote recognition fail! I’m disappointed in you, Bond.
Cheers m’dears.
*does mandatory Groucho impression with cigar*
*slowly sinks into chair with scotch while the workday peters away*
Just what the doctor ordered!
Take a seat my dear DrB, we can watch the fails sail by.
You’re right Ry. Sometimes it’s right/nice to vary pronounciation. If I met a woman and my kids were happy enough with her to vary…then that’s okay with me…
I only say mom instead of mum because i got told off badly for not correctly speaking English in my english class back in high school. And my english teacher was irish.
*Flips paper on clipboard* And just how is our bear sspeccimen code name “Winney-the-pooh” taking to the ED medicated honey. *Looks at bear* Good lord nursse, lower the dosage, at this rate he’s going to shoot his eye out!
Well, that would certainly be a most gratifying manner in which to shoot out one’s eye!
Although, I’m not entirely sure if Christopher Robin would buy the “Well, you see… what happened was… well basically… I… well… I… I “blasted” myself in the eye! I wasn’t doing anything indecent, though!”
Oh, Christopher Robin. You must learn as some point…
Eek! Pedobear!
*flees*
Wait for me!
*screams and runs out of room*
Bond, you are WAY too old for pedobear. You can stop screaming and run back in here, you’re safe.
He’s just using that as an excuse to go after Mikey D. (yeah Mikey you better keep running…)
I am 14, you sodding troll.
and that was 30 years ago
Nah, he’s 14. It’s just that pedobear likes loli, Bond doesn’t need to worry.
bond loves pedobear i bet he’s all over it right now…. i think this is a special at K mart….
GOGOGO
Pedobears won’t nest below this level. =O
Yes they will.
bond fans wont annoy me below this level
But you’re Mom will…MA!!!
they even got the curve right
i cant decide if that counts for a win, or a fail… both?
wont they? im thinking nest level counting fail.
u shouldve seeen by the look n my eyes baaahaybey BUH…there was sumthing missahhhhhnnnhg…BAH BUH
U shouldve known by the tone o my voice MAYAAAbey duh …but u didn’t listeeehehnnn…..BUH BUUh
ah You played Dead…
But ya never bledd
…instead u lay
still
in the grass,
alll coiled and Hiiiissssiiaahhhnnnng
u know i know all about those meheehheennn …
still i dont remember DUH BAH
cuz it was us baby wayyyy b4 thehehmmmm
and were still togeteher….BUH BUH
and i meant
every word i said,
WHEN i said that
ilove UUU imeant,
that i love u 4 ehhhhhhhverRRRrr
n ima gonna keep in luvin uuuuuuuYuu
cuz itx the only thin i waan d doooohhhoooo
i dont wanna sleep i just wanna keep oon luvvingggu UUOOH
But normal people will
OH YES THEY WILL!!!!!!!!!!
OH YES THEY WILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!moo
Oh, will they now?
I’ve told you before….use your INDOOR voice!!!
Bad!
Happy Bear though:)
YES MOMMY! Why are you NAKED Mommy? What are you doing with that? It’s my new Happy Bear coat hook, NOT a Mommy hook! You are silly Mommy!
You seem familiar.
You seem to like your mummy *edges his way to the door*
That’s one freaking big bear dick!
Little Bear is not amused.
I literally ROFL
Could it bear a heavy load?
I can’t bear it any longer.
I can’t bear it any wider.
I can’t bear it any deeper.
I can’t bear it any harder.
I can’t bear it any quicker.
I can’t bear it any further.
I can’t bear it any harder, better, faster, stronger.
…around the world.
That’s extra.
And not offered on Sundays.
Says you!
You Spin me right round baby right round like a record player right round round round …….. ahhh good old meatspin:)
Spinning costs extra too baby.
this comment thread is just PACKED with epicness and win.
This is bearly a fail, if its fail at all.
i cant bare your teeth
I can’t bear all this brown stuff on the sheets…oh wait, he was a Pooh bear.
SO DOES GAY PR0N!
Extra? I do say good… persons, this thread is relevent to my interests!… or just relevant to the lulz. I’m having a hard time deciding…
oh noes!
You gotta grin and bear it.
Grin and bear it.
Even with the time-travel helmet?
I just folded space with that helmet on.
Whoever ordered that is going to be pissed.
we’ve all just gotta grin and bear it.
so yah i eat babies
You’re no potato. Try some originality…it might punctuate your lonliness a little more than imitation.
that’s just showing off, mr Bear..
yes, i believe in this case it would be showing off! Proportionally, that is enormous! yay, mr. bear! lol
If it’s a towel hook, I can do that too.
pics plz
I tried to take one with my cell phone, but they wanted to charge me long distance.
HA
…I think I’d rather just take his word for it…
awkwaaaaaaaard…
Look, pics or it didn’t happen! Learn the rules.
“Look! No hands!!”
I think it’s a Ranger holder…
No it’s Power Rangerz! (wat)
Your mom’s the pink Power Ranger! (wat)
A measurement of electricity! (watt)
Resistance is not futile! (Ohm)
Safety not Guaranteed (wat)
I can break these! (cuffs)
IT’S A TRAP! (traps)
How did I get myself into this! (stuck)
If I got what Wolf was trying to do correctly… I don’t think you got what we were doing ;D
That happens
I’ve no idea what they were doing.
(wat?)
A pleasurement of eccentricity! (vat)
A pleasurement of Mookie! (twat)
A hidden treasurement of Ry (hot).
I’d like you to meet my wife (hat)
You misspelled meat.
He meent to do that.
I’m vegetarian, I beet things, not meat them.
I’m vegetarian too! No dead meat for me.
If we were meant to be vegeterians, why did god make cows taste so good with A-1?
Cows are just Vegetable By-Products.
Cows eat grass/hay/grain, (all vegetable matter).
Cows grow and produce milk and meat from the veggies they eat. So, if you’re eating meat or dairy you’re just eating vegetables transformed into another form. Plus, steak taste Much Better than Hay!
I’m a vagiterian.
I’m a vagitarian.
It was nice of you to eat that twice.
Groan…..
Oh, Mikey. I was at work and didn’t nest in time, but you’re awesome with your Oliver Sacks.
As soon as he loses that erection, my hat is going to fall.
Baby, you can leave your hat on.
This hanger is designed for panties.
Hahahaha! Panty hanger WIN!
But I’d rather put my panties where I usually, do, around your ears.
Then I can use the hook hanger for my pants. I won’t be needing them for a while.
A long while, I’m hoping… *cancels afternoon appointments*
*calls to Sneaky Restaurant to cancel dinner*
Don’t worry, I’ll feed ya’. I’m making your favorite…
I love your recipes. So hot and at the same time so raw…
*prepares spicy tuna roll for Lou*
Now I am really hungry!
Another think I like of your recipes: no cutlery is needed.
Your teeth will be sufficient, I agree.
I already cleaned my hands. Hope you don’t mind if I help myself with them.
No problem, this is a self-serve buffet. And all-you-can-eat on Tuesdays!
*looks calendar*
Wow, this is my lucky day!
Get it while it’s hot (and bothered).
*is well-behaved and does not talk with his mouth full*
*encourages Lou to have seconds, and thirds*
May I have also a dessert?
*wonders how to burn those extra calories*
ÂżQuizás te gustarĂa probar estas cerezas? Ten cuidado, están muy tiernas.
Mis labios apretaran lo justo para saborearlas.
Las peras parecen magnificas!
Están maduras y preparadas para comer… Y veo que traes alguna crema para las cerezas…
Si, traje mi propia crema; espero que no suponga un problema.
Por cierto, si la cocinera tiene hambre, sus deseos seran ordenes para mi
Supongo que me podrĂa comer. ÂżQuĂ© tienes?
Puedes elegir entre carne y verdura. No soy buen cocinero pero son productos de la mejor calidad.
Usualmente no como la carne, pero eso me parece muy deliciosa. Pero es tan grande… tengo un poco miedo… No me duelas tanto…
No te preocupes, la carne esta tan jugosa que y veras como entra muy facilmente.
¡No engorda y puedes repetir!
Si me prometes… Puedes hacerme lo que quieras…
Si confĂŻas en mi buen hacer… ¡no te arrepentiras!
No me has decepcionado nunca. Siempre me das lo que necesito …
Hablando de ingredientes de buena calidad, ¿que te parece que añadamos algo de aceite al menú?
Creo qué esto es un buena idea… ¿Quieres que yo lo uso aqu�
Si, un poco de aceite justo aqui supone el toque maestro.
Por cierto, ahora las peras estan todavĂa más suaves, brillantes y apetitosas!
Dios, sus manos están muy suaves y hábil… Por favor, no se detienas hasta que…
Ahora las manos se deslizan solas. ¡No podrĂa detenerlas aunque quisiera!
Chico, eres una máquina de placer… Esto va a matarme, sin duda alguna…
No te preocupes, no vas a desfallecer. Yo llamo a esta técnica la respiración boca a boca preventiva.
Tienes muchos talentos, me parece…
Reading you guys remind me of going to my ex-husband’s family for Saturday dinner. The novelas are way steamier than the American soap operas.
Lou me ayuda practicar mi español… y otras cosas…
Si, porque para dominar la lengua hay que practicar mucho con ella.
Oye, dame la lengua! Yo la necesita… pues, puedes usarla si quieras…
Simplemente dime por que partes quieres que la use.
Para comenzar… cualquier cosa que sea mojada…
Me gusta la idea. Casi todo esta mojado ahora mismo
Si, es hora de cambiar estas sábanas.
Unos minutos más y seguro que tendremos otro motivo más para cambiar las sábanas.
¿Dónde está la ShamWow?
Dame cinco minutos para recuperar el aliento y te ayudo a buscarla.
Yo creo que B2th la tiene.
FAIL
On the menu today: Mookies and Cream
reference win 2
In my younger days, I could knock off any person’s hat with my erection from 5 yards away. Nowadays, I have to stand a bit closer. Waning eyesight, you know.
Guess you don’t need such tall boots after all, eh?
5 Yards? That’s BULLSH!T czuhc!!
My Yard is 110′ wide x 200′ deep. So even using the narrower distance, you’re saying you could “knock off any person’s hat” from 550 Feet away! The longest throw for a baseball is 445 Feet! Even if your erection was detachable, why would you even try to do this?
Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you happy to see me?
Got it in two…
He’s VERY happy to see you, as are we all.
I love the fact his wide open arms and expression seem to say
‘Ta-daaa, look at that!’
For me the wide open arms and expression seem to say “Bear Hug you won’t forget in 3… 2… 1…”
“If you go out in the woods today,
You’re sure of a big surprise…”♪
Yikes! What are those Teddybears eating…?
Poor Alex’s meat.
Reference win!
Ring ring ring ring ring ring…. bananawoaoaahhh!!
Now this chair is juuuuust… riiiiight.
So is his bed…and his porridge, amirite?
Porridge seemed a little lumpy. He needs to drink more water.
I wonder if he’s a meat-eating or a vegetarian sort of bear? His porridge would taste a little different.
Hmmm, I’m getting a hint of cilantro. You?
Sushi rice: a little salt and sugar and a hint of rice wine vinegar, perhaps?
Eat me raw, eh?
I would, yeah.
The fail is just AWESOME!
lolololololol boner max >.>
From-
Ura Dilly Doe
Why, thank you!
A triple fail meal for Mookie, since he posted 3 times in a row, and all 3 of them were cheesy unfunny lines.
SHE also failed at being a male. Oh woe.
Wins at making me chuckle though.
The shiraz was sooo close to being snorted on the 3 bears ref. I think i damaged my diaphragm.
My favourite’s the classic banana in the pocket line. Loved that ever since Monkey Island.
Snorting Shiraz, interesting idea. . .
Here…would you be so good as to hold these for a bit?
*Passes shiraz and bag of straws*
.
I gots to toddle off for a bit…enjoy!!!
Mae West definitely pre-dates Monkey Island.
But it’s…pink.
You snort shiraz?? What the hell?
Triple win for JasonK
1- Not being a shameless troll
2- Being funny, hilarious, humorous and brilliat
3- Guessing Mookie’s gender
Now go to rolfrazzi page to get your prize.
Brillat? Is he Borat’s brother?
Borat’s brother? BF, how you dare to insult people of Kazakhstan?
I am of the apologising.
Good, he’s clearly talking about Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin.
“Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you who you are.”
Japanese Iron Chef quote recognition fail! I’m disappointed in you, Bond.
Who? What? I don’t watch that kind of TV!
Why, do you only have four channels and have to pay a tv tax? *snickers*
Yes, how did you know? You must be psychic!
*SARCASM, FOR THE MENTALLY SLOW*
I’m not slow… just lazy!
I’m slowly going mental.
*passes the cigar and scotch*
Cheers m’dears.
*does mandatory Groucho impression with cigar*
*slowly sinks into chair with scotch while the workday peters away*
Just what the doctor ordered!
Take a seat my dear DrB, we can watch the fails sail by.
*on the roof garden*
You know, I love these leather chairs under the stars…
Now you are spoiling me.
*leans back to watch the stars high above and drifts to sleep*
*carefully covers both with blankets*
Lol…is Sakai invincible?
Of course! He’s the Delacroix of French cuisine, Fukui-san!
I love you. Errr…I mean, perhaps not all women are like my ex.
Perhaps not
But Kinichi always looked like he was working so hard! Poor sweaty Iron Chef…
I bet his food was ridiculously salty! That jester outfit was no barrier to his sweat glands. I did like watching him toss a wok around, though.
And whenever he made shark-fin soup, he’d throw it up in the air and catch it again…
How dare you be an unfunny twat!
By virtue of being a twat, he is funny. Have you seen one up close? They are quite comical looking if you ask me.
You should SEE the cardigans they wear when standing next to road signs.
I guess I shouldn’t have gotten rid of the vagina avatar.
Wh…You never ! Did you ?
Thanks, champ. I too posted three times in a row. I really appreciate your post on the only one I was actually happy with. Cheers.
First!
Wanker.
The innuendo machine just exploded.
Hopefully if can hang on for a few more fails.
*KABLAM*
*Looks at* I’m not cleaning that up.
Hm, I’m not sure if LB would be happy to hear that or not.
Who had the ShamWow last?
I think you had it, akshully.
I thought it was all used up?
That’s the beauty of ShamWow – a quick run through the washer and it goes from buttwipe to dinner napkin.
Man, those ingenious Germans!
…Unless you forget to use soap in the washer. Man, I felt
likea dingleberry that night!Just the corners.
and the very middle, I’m affraid I loved the shamwow alittle too much. *hangs head in shame*
You didn’t! And then I used it as a washcloth… Oh God, B2th, I think I’m having your baby…
shamwow on you
Artificial Inshamination?
In(fomercial)vitro.
When’s the baby shamwower?
Immaculate conception?
This is all being very difficult to absorb…
the amount of phallic hangers made is just unbearable
i bearly caught that (most likely unintentional) pun
no no fully intentional
it was very intentional
After Winnie retired from TV, he turned towards a seedier career.
…as a corn farmer….
Yogi, however, took a turn none would have ever guessed…..
He still decides what goes in the picnic baskets at some places though…
He went from Booboo to Boobies.
From picnics to dicklicks.
From Mr. Ranger to Rump Ranger.
From Rump Ranger to the Pleasure Manger.
From Pleasure Manger to Pedo Hanger. 6 degrees of separation win.
From Pedo Hanger to Sexual Orientation changer.
Bear phallus win.
That is a phallacy except in China where it is an aphrodisiac.
and everyone wondered why little Veronica grew to only be attracted to burly asian men?
Only YOU can prevent priapism!
On top of old smokey. . .
mommie why are bears diffrant than girls?
when a ma.. bear and a woman love eachother very much or are bouth very drunk…
1. They’re completely different animals
2. Er…
3. That’s it!
I was once told I look very “bear” like…
in which manner? oh my!
Probably a hairy a$$, smelly breath on both ends and in general smelled like old fish. j/k Retaba ;P
Sounds like a squirrel more than a bear if you ask me.
LOOK MUM!
NO HANDS!
Mum? You must be a Brit according to your spelling!
*RULE BRITANNIA!*
Austr-alien, but i prefer saying it as mom
’s alright, I have alot of Aussie friends.
oooeh then its ok!
Becouse i know only 1.
I don’t have any Australian friends that say mom…
I was engaged to an Aussie for a year. He got my son in the habit of saying mum instead of mom and he has been calling me that ever since.
You’re right Ry. Sometimes it’s right/nice to vary pronounciation. If I met a woman and my kids were happy enough with her to vary…then that’s okay with me…
I’m an American, and I say mum.
Of course, I also say “mayhap” “forsooth” and “odds my bodkin”, so that doesn’t
necessarily mean anything.
lol
I only say mom instead of mum because i got told off badly for not correctly speaking English in my english class back in high school. And my english teacher was irish.
lol, I’m Irish and say Mum, but most of the (irish) people I know say Mam
Gives new and awful meanings to the phrase: “Well-hung”
Its also a hooker
I’m thru with you baby. Your money’s on the dresser.
Ryan? Did you ever figure out that pie chart issue you were having?
*Flips paper on clipboard* And just how is our bear sspeccimen code name “Winney-the-pooh” taking to the ED medicated honey. *Looks at bear* Good lord nursse, lower the dosage, at this rate he’s going to shoot his eye out!
*puts on jester costume, dances and sings*
“Youuuu’ll shoot your eyyyyyyye out!”
I love that movie, glad you were able to pick up on my reference.
It is, and will always remain, my most favorite Christmas movie of all time.
2nd favorite christmas movie, It’s a wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart.
Clarence Oddbody, AS2.
Well, that would certainly be a most gratifying manner in which to shoot out one’s eye!
Although, I’m not entirely sure if Christopher Robin would buy the “Well, you see… what happened was… well basically… I… well… I… I “blasted” myself in the eye! I wasn’t doing anything indecent, though!”
Oh, Christopher Robin. You must learn as some point…
Dear god. The heffalumps…
And woozles. . .
Mommy what’s that?
Uh, nothing honey, its..uh… a banana, yeah.
This photo is clearly photoshopped!
I can’t see shadows….
And the color is yellow.
Bear isnt actually a bear.
*stamps IGNORE*
Are you suggesting their line of phallic shaped kids room accessories doesn’t exist? I am pretty sure this is from the Michael Jackson collection.
♫
just have an open mind
and then suddenly you’ll find
phallic shaped kids room accessories land
…proving that size matters when you’re a bear.
Gives a new meaning to the song title ‘the bare/bear necessities’
It also give a new meaning to the song ‘Hakuna Matata’
new meaning to “Kiss the Girl”
Winnie the Pooh really likes his “hunny”
Take THAT Mr. Ranger!
What?!
Walker Texas Ranger?!
You dare go up and insult Chuck Norris?!
May you have a painless death…
This is what happens when you try to find Chuck Norris (clickie my name!).
*clicks k-k-k-katy’s name*
Oh god, Oh man, Oh God, Oh man!
OMG HE FOUND ME!
Yogi Bear, Boo-Boo, Mr. Ranger? Cmon, I’m not THAT old!
boy do I feel like a twat right now
Sometimes you feel like a twat, sometimes you don’t!
And sometimes, you feel a twat.
I’m sorry, we had twat last night. Tonight I’m making doucheeburgers.
And hair pie for dessert? Please say yes!
Oh, I only have cherry!
Pfft that cherry has been smashed, squeezed, juiced and left out to dry. I am not about to eat that pie.
No, this is the other cherry. The one in the back.
Hmmmmm, uh, we, I, uh, I am at a loss for words and tend to be drooling.
That’s a potato?
*rides in on dogsled*
*SQUEEEEEEEEZE!!!*
*jumps back on dogsled and MUSH!-es away*
Oh, YOOOGIIII!!!
Yogi, Mr. Ranger isn’t going to like this.
But, he shouldn’t of brought a picnic basket with him!
Picinic
Well, look who’s not the average bear.
the happy hooker hanger bear emoticon
:3
I believe that would be :3-
Hey Boo Boo! Look what I have for You You!
This would make a great gift
Yes, where can one of these be purchased??? Anybody tried fishing around for them?
Ask for it in your local sex shop. Tell them you are interested on P-Spot stimulation.
What would you use a hook hanger for? To store your extra hooks when you aren’t using htem?
The bad is who thinks bad!
*gives hug* hello pedobear…long time no see. this time i’ll be peter pan and you’ll be capt. hook. mmmmmm….good times.
Well…at least it’s to scale.
Well hello norm. I like the scale your on.
boner
This is just the new Wonder Boner line of room accessories. You can find them at Home Depot and Lowes.
Finally, a place to hang my anus.
Definitely five thumbs… if not five pedobears, of course.
phaillic?
WHERE CAN I BUY THIS?!
You can take a bear out of the woods,
but you can’t take the wood out of the bear.
But…where does it shit?
On the pope.
Oh god! Where is Benedict XVI shitting??
On the eggs.
WhErE dO eGgS sHiT!?!?!?!?!?!?
respect
If a tree falls in the woods and there’s nobody there to hear it…does a yellow bear boner FAIL at turning ur mom on ?
I know it’s a long tail, but in the front.
The new tail, not the fail hanger
http://www.dorion55.com
hahas. anyone would love this a gift?
lol. they shld totally do a female bear bending down.
*gives an evil smirk* xP
awesome FAILness. (:
Wow, even more explicit than the previous one.
http://failblog.org/2008/04/17/more-design-fail/
Buy this and the wonder boner is free!
Warning! Choking Hazard: Keep away from small children.
moar like keep away from loli
things like this you know people just dont give a shit anymore
look at that huge-ass dick
Moments like this…you know its made in China o-O
Compensation anyone?
That bear has a wunder-boner.
I wonder if Mrs Bear has that same smile
Oh my lord…that’s disturbing.
a thing like this is obviously made on prupose lol
Yeah, I really want one of these too! They should have em with different animals.
pedobear wears inflatable condom
PEDO-BEAR!
AHAHAH WESLEY KIJK DAN
That’s one happy bear
I WANT ONE!!!
That just looks WRONG…
omg its got a large penish
FAIL! XD
vfghsfghsfghsfg
Hmm…I wonder what desperate woman would want to buy that accessory…lol
The most masculine bear in the woods.
I’VE SEEN SOMETHING SIMILAR ON 60 minute Makeover!!
WATCH OUT! he might rape you in your sleep
im sure this song will fit the mood
For the women of the world.
Peanut butter vs Nutella. I PICK NUTELLA
Hook Hanger is redundant…Title=Fail
its a win. EPIC win.
Pedro bear, you ‘re alive