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What would possess someone to call their company “The Family Fruit Basket”?
The same family that thinks jelly should taste like a close relative.
.
Glad that’s not my family!
Their moth balls actually taste much closer to what grandma tastes like.
Why did I hit “add comment” with this one?
At least Grandma has a youthful appearance but she needs to let her hair grow.
grandma looks like the son from king of the hill, anybody watch that stuff?
OMFG soo true! and same thing with ryannon. But what if she just got over cancer? then the chemotherapy made her lose her hair? and she had anorexia? and then… nevermind lets end there.
nah, thats just grandma’s cannibalistic grandchild
mmmm….grandma tastes like blood….
But…you hadn’t hit it yet when you were writing it…but you said…
OH DEAR GOD THE SPACE-TIME CONTINUUM
Hehe, i’ve noticed that all the “first” haters always hit “reply to this comment” instead of just “post comment” at the end of the page, and Freud says that that is because they have small genitals and therefore want to be displayed as close to the top of the page as possible, so that their comment gets noticed by as many people as possible, hence boosting their ego.
I say that this way of proceeding is by far worse than actually saying “First”.
The problem is, that i did it too now, meaning that my subconsciousness tells me that i got small genitals in spite of saying “First”, according to Freud.
Btw, FIRST!
I have a coat hanger with your name on it.
I have a loaded boner with your name on it.
Looks more like kibble and bits than a true bone.
?
°|°
ACTUAL SIZE
BOTW for that chain of posts!
There are some posters here who like chains. Takes all kinds, ya know.
Omg…you hit “reply to this comment” and actually spoke to another person. What a HUGE ego you have!
i’d rather have huge privates, but that’s the way it is
It’s just so unfortunate that they’re above your shoulders.
Tom: “i’d rather have huge privates, but that’s the way it is”
.
You obviously overlooked that little notice on the bottom of your mirror: “Caution, objects in mirror appear bigger then they really are”.
.
Huge privates are better than little corporals.
Not for people with small quonset huts.
Id rather have huge colonels! (while were on the military subject)
I would think thank would make it kinda hard to walk..
“that,” that is. My brain really isn’t what it used to be.
Was it ever?
At least he admits that he has…size??… issues. Or maybe it’s that he lacks the private to grow on.
Actually, I meant my cranial brain… but that works too. ^_~
velvet is right. I love the chains.
I’d rather have huge colonels. (while were talking about the military)
Wait… shouldn’t we be supporting PETA?
I’m confused.
I like huge privets, especially in maze formation.
It’s not the size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean. And besides, too big a willy takes too much lotion.
explain to me how this conversation went from grandma flavor jelly to privates? -FREE BIRD!
why have huge privates when you can buy the wunder boner?
OMG! You are SOoOoOoOoOoOo clever!
(and thank you for saying privates for the purpose of not spoiling my innocence)
Someone’s not getting enough “military action” recently.
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!(well not really, i just did that so someone would say i phailed
Bitch Mookies my nikname XD
I will never be the same after this enthralling read.
We agree Tom. You have a tiny pecker.
To be fair, everyone looks small compared to Alex’s meat.
A few years ago, when my English was still a bit wobbly, I concluded a letter to a Danish lady with “Three peckers on the cheeks, the Belgian way”.
*packs bags and takes first flight out to Belgium*
LOL, you are so cute!
That’s not what SHE said.
Then you should have just taken a bite of her delicious pastry head.
Mookie, I miss your cougar pic.
She’ll be back. She’s out on the prowl.
Is that like Mushroom Print, the American way?
Mushroom Print, as in building up to Dirty Sanchez ?
I have three rules that cannot be broken.
1. No mushroom printing – very disrespectful and degrading
2. No name calling – I am not your bitch or whore and you are not my daddy.
3. Never on the face or in the hair – burns the eyes, bad for the skin and I don’t use any product in my hair, I don’t need yours in there either.
Just for curiosity sake, what rules do you have that CAN be broken?
Those rules that can be broken technically are not rules
Those three are prtty much it. Oh and after my experience with Mookie, no girls.
Then your experience with Mookie was very different to mine.
“Mushroom printing”?
I have the feeling this isn’t what you meant.
And I quote:
“When a dude slaps his penis against someone and it leaves a mark like a mushroom.”
Let’s use it in a sentence now: “You better take that back or I’ll give you a mushroom print right across your forehead!”
Wow. Then I guess I really shouldn’t visit the link where Martha Stewart shows how to make mushroom prints; that could be traumatizing.
If Martha Stewart can mushroom print, then she deserves all she has.
That would certainly explain a lot, wouldn’t it?
Mushroom printing, lady loving… Martha’s been in jail, she’s seen the world.
She’s probably handy with a shank too.
I had to look that up earlier. Being somewhat interested in mycology, I had a whole different image of things.
I am in shock that you didn’t know what it was.
I’ve learned a lot since reading failblog:
.
Mushroom print, dirty sanchez, tubgirl, I’m getting educated all over again.
Funny thing is I have made mushroom prints before to get the spore color and shape so as to identity the fungus.
.
I don’t think I’ll be able to ever do that again now.
Have you tried the bucking bronco?
Never tried a Turkish Snowcone? Portuguese Breakfast? Filthy Ramirez?
An Amanita muscaria? Muscimol? An indole of the tryptamine family? An entheogen? An 5-HT1A and 5-HT2A/2C agonist? Psilocin?
Psylocybin?! AAAhhhHH!
Ever been to a Dead show?
My dumb@** went googling it only to find pages worth of how to make artwork with mushroom spores, rather than reading down a few comments.
Oh, and ow!
1. It’s a pleasure tool, not a baton or a bat, only placed where suggested.
2. I dont want you to call me names, I want to make you forgot yours and mine.
3. Not a sadist and that would just mean you have more to cleanup.
Your teepee or mine?
Both, and everywhere in between. Why limit the location?
Dirty Sanchez is my Guitar Hero band’s name! Although I can’t get onto Nintendo Wi-Fi with it. I wonder if that’s because it’s “inappropriate or becaus esomeone else took it first.
is it important that the lady is danish?
It was important to emphasize that she was not familiar with Belgian customs.
AND she likes kringles
You weren’t the guy in Bruges who bought me a kwak and propositioned me for a three-way…were you…?
So…what IS the Belgian way? Can you show me?
All it takes is an Ardennes lover.
Ahh…that’s a lover who is very gentle and won’t Bruges me, right?
Admiral’s apt to use an ‘maginotive line …
small penises covered with chocolate
Yep, that sums it up pretty well.
It’s similar to the French way only without the attitude.
I’ll have to bring some friends, of course.
My genitals are a great size for me. They got bigger over time. I guess being female has advantages. BTW, Nice to meet you Tom the First.
What’s with old man balls getting bigger? I once saw a guy sitting with is legs open and his balls took up half the chair. No wonder he had to sit with his legs open. He crossed his legs and his voice went up 3 octaves. At least ours just dry up and lose the hair.
Testicular hypertrophy. The same can happen with ovaries – either can end up weighing 2-3 kilos.
My ovaries are a distant mammary, as is my uterus. I don’t think they are going to be any where near 2-3 kilos unless they are being used in a science lab. Although I must say, my doctor complimented me on how lovely my ovaries were when he removed them.
That was oophally nice of him to say. I’m sure they were lovely.
WHAT???
FIRST!
I love big butts and i cannot lie…
Except it’s clearly photoshopped from “Grandma’s”. Not remotely as interesting as a real ‘fail’.
When I was a child, then we had fails!
You young’uns don’t even know what a fail is. We lived through the Blitz! That was failing! You don’t know what failing is!
Where are my teeth?
The spirit of the grandma they made into the jam.
That on the picture is Alex’s brother.
He seems happy, but he does not know that his own meat will be the next on sale.
That’s the line of Mincemeat Pie Filling you are thinking of lou.
They are so familiar.
They made good profit with the home made babies business.
Are you implying that boy’s grandma has fruits?
The fruits of her loins. Kinda rotten, though.
*Just does that full-body-shudder*
I think they might prefer the term “well-aged”.
Or cured.
Or dried, like a prune.
Seedless?
And she’s back in full force!
yeah, the force is strong with that one.
It’s your fault, Ry…you invoked the name a few fails back.
He he… Avis blamed me… *passes the buckarooney*
Across the eighth dimension?
Oldy Moldy? or Crusty Dusty?
Would they ferment?
They’re called squishy melons
No, that was a couple fails ago…
More like slammin’ melons.
One made the other, just not in this order…
Before she was ground up and put in the jam, she probably had some flat melons.
Tasty!
And to think her grandkids were the apple of her eye.
More like apple of her indigestion.
Of course: Melons. This becomes a flavor identification fail, too.
Ugh. Never mention melons again. THANKS, Ryannon.
Tee freaking hee!
btw, video was not from Argentina TV was from Spain.
I would feel embarrassed if I had some shame left.
Meh, shame is overrated.
Did you know “shame” is an eponym, it was invented by Albert Shame?
No I did not.
Are you showing off? Hmm? Eponym?
She’s not showing off, but she’s tall and tan and young and lovely.
Ok, so that made me laugh.
And I didn’t even laugh at the bear with the penis so…
Thanks, Admiral. I’m so very far from tan, but I do go walking…ahh!
Sorry, Lou – I think I’m to blame for your lack of shame…
Not a big change, I was already blaming you for my excess of libido.
Have you heard about this syndrome where you have no shame glands? Instead, they are replaced by awesome glands – true story
Bleah…
Charlie?!
Mmm… tastes like grandma *drools*
Depends?
They should call their company “Soylent Corporation.”
JUst like the alex meat lol
who would call something “tastes like grandma” for that matter
first
Ohhhh Billyyyy! Lick it! Lick it! Lick it! Ohhh who’s your sexy grandmaaa ohhh… Try our new Black Raspberry Ho-Made Jam! It tastes like Sexy Grandmaaa!
Fisting Fist
Dilettanting dilettante
Lunching Lunchbox
Medicating medicat.
Draggin’ dragon.
Admiring^ admiral.
cuddling* cuddles
Desirous^^ dragon.
(and gives mr. cuddles a cuddle as well)
Marinating Marius.
Retarded Ret… wait… this is bad!
Heh heh heh…
Ryvolving Ryannon
Ruminating Raelalt.
Bod the Bod
Sporking titaniumspork.
wooting woo~
Hahahahahaha.
*squeeze*
Buttering” ButteredToast
I had you for breakfast and you were quite tasty.
I had him for tea, and it was yummy.
But we’re being cheated on!
Airing Airigh.
Cloring Cloral?
Crap, that doesn’t really work.
*cloroforms Cloral*
Now you don’t really have to worry about it, do you?
*has PTSD episode remembering chloroform*
Funny thing, NJ101.5’s dj was talking about how we grew up surviving all the things that kids today are ’scarred for life’ if they experience… riding around with no car seat or seat belt, biking without a helmet… and- surgery with CHLOROFORM!!! I was rofl-ing.
Judging Judy
Try NeenerNeenerNeenering NeenerNeenerNeener!
GladWokeUp with my kick stand up!
…and now we have a male version of Cecili…
Is that good, bad, otherwise?
YES
Maybe? I am confused now, was gonna give you some pre-hulled almonds.
Delighting* dilettante
____
*a.k.a. fuzzing
(btw, Dilly, send me your email so I can delit it)
This pleases me greatly. Commence.
.
*just add cranberry*
it’s between my t.e.e.t.h., babe.
What an unusual urn.
I bet she tastes gritty, like corn muffins.
Or musty, like dust bunnies.
Oily like Grecian formula?
Or savory like Grandma in a jar.
Or crusty like Grandpa’s beard.
Grandpa, were you eating Grandma? Your beard looks a little red.
Congrats! I am scarred for life!
And I don’t scar easily
First tattoo?
Da pain! Da pain!
Voulez-vous du pain? *gives Marius a croissant*
Makes terrible tattoo reference – gets French bread.
Should have said Da vin! Da vin!
*Munches.*
I heard Da Vinci munched on somethings very interesting.
Da Carpi?
qu’ils mangent de la grand-mère
Or minty like Ben Gay.
Or doubled like Ben Dover.
I’ll show you Ben Dover…
*sets up the melon cam*
You have been sitting on the wrong lap little girl, nut I wi9ll clear you off somewhere to sit.
*blink*
*hands GIWU the bukkit*
Li’l over-eager there, were you?
A case of premature postulation.
The “nutting” has me a bit concerned in the same sentence with little girl.
Kinda like asking, “Who’s your daddy” during sex? There’s a misplaced sexual reference, if there ever was one!
Someone once asked me that during sex. I turned to him, took the ball gag out of my mouth and replied “Ray, why? I didn’t think you were into guys”
I bet he deflated like a pool toy in a room full of tacks… besides, there are so many more imaginative things to say.
.
Umm, if YOU took out the ball gag, weren’t you doin’ it wrong?
*Hangs his head* Guess you didn’t read my response to your mushroom print, I will be over here in the corner with the bukkit. *slinks away with bukkit, and bottle of XR Crown*
If your safe word was that long, Ryannon, no wonder your arms weren’t properly restrained! Good thinking.
Damnit, it’s not even good chocolate milk mix!
Cartman…
that’s a rather tender subject, another slice anyone?
Mmmmm.
Urine and Moth Ball flavored jelly.
Don’t forget the hard candies in a bowl!
The ribbon candies that are all stuck together?
Or the dusty Jordan almonds.
I just haven’t been the same since someone told me grandma had sourballs.
With just a hint of Ben-Gay goodness!
Don’t forget the baby powder scent, too… grandmas always smell like baby powder.
.
How do you think they make baby powder, anyway? Do they roast the Home Made Babies first, or just dry them and grind them up?
And that old lady perfume scent that makes you nauseous after you hug her.
Geraniums. Always with the geranium smell.
Like instant coffee; freeze dried and powdered.
Add some baby powder to water, you’ll be surprised what happens.
Mmm I’m getting so hungry!
Also try our new Menendez Brothers Mayonnaise
Or for those watching their waist line, Jeffrey Dahmer Djonnaise. It tastes like Mayo with a zing and far less calories.
Have you tried the Richard Ramirez Remoulade?? It’s quite spicy!
Your family will die to get their hands on some of our Charles Manson Mustard
Oh, I bet that would go great with the Sam Salami, on Berkowitz Bread!
And to accompany that mandwich, have some Zodiac Zingers. The spicy chip that hides in your colon for 20 years before making a comeback.
Aren’t those made in Green River? I know the Ridgway Ruffles are…
Not sure but the Unibomber Burritos have quite a kick to them.
Should have ordered the Al-Qaida Quesadilla instead.
Next time, try the FARC fries, they’re not so spicy.
AAAH!! Grandma, no!!!!! You had so much to live for!
Well, she had a good run.
Now she’s giving me the runs.
Take the phrase “giving you a run for your money” to a whole new level.
I’d do so if I knew where it had been.
It’s been on the run.
Or on the lam.
Does lam taste good with grandma jam, do you suppose?
Flambé, flambé not.
Hee!
Shall we lambaste some trolls instead?
You could say Namasté to some friends, too.
*rolls the dice* Yahtzee!
*reads nobel-winning author* Coetzee!
*parleys with Apaches to deliver mail* Cochise!
MONKEY ON THE LAM!
You’re right, Ralphie, it DOES taste like Grandma!
I’d like to buy a pack or a bushel or whatever. Just gimme!
Can I interest you in Grandpa? He comes by the quart.
Listen, keep your bedroom habits in the bedroom, young lady. You were the one sending Dad the text about the beach, weren’t you?
with a name like Smuckers its got to taste grandma’s goods
My bedroom is being repainted so I’ve been forced to relocate temporarily to the comment boxes on FB.
Oh, well, OK then.
Sorry, Mookie, where are my manners?
*offers an alternative bedroom*
*climbs in* Don’t hog the covers!
Mmmm, tomacco jam.
Furst 4 meez!
I’m sorry, what?
There is no Dana…
Oh Zoolie you nut!
The Dana is a lie?
Was it good for you? Hope so because you left the rest of us unsatisfied.
Jimmy, dont put your finger in Grandma, use a spoon.
Ew….just EEEWWW!
I concur.
Pass the spoon!
*I stir*
Ahhhh, revulsion! I love it.
I lol’d.
I squeezed.
*Squeeze*
see!
I’m still f’in lol’ing!!!!! You’re killin’ me man!
I know mouth to whatever, pretend to pass out, I will show ya!
Grandma’s jam spreads so well on Grandpa’s buns.
Eeewww, Mookie…
Tossed salad is the perfect complement for that appetizer.
Gives Lou the bukkit. *holds his head*
For those times when no one is around except the dog
What if the cat is watching?
He has to wait his turn…
I thought that was what the peanut butter was for.
The peanut butter was for women I thought. The men need something too!
I am so glad I am allergic to peanuts.
If you weren’t before you probably are now.
You just have to make sure and use CREAMY peanut butter, cuz chunky just makes em bite… and that’s bad for EVERYBODY. Wait, what?
You’re nasty, you will fit right in. How do you feel about potatoes?
Fooking genius !
Grandma was sooo dedicated…she put a little bit of herself into EVERY jar!!
Of course…no artificial coloring needed!
That comment is vericose to being disgusting.
Get over yourself, Markov, you’re being vein.
He probably thinks this fail is about him.
Earworm rape. Thanx.
And all the girls dreamed that they’d be your partner
They’d be your partner, and…
Great, gang rape.
Weekly?
I’d want to see their applications first.
Maybe they only wan mim wage or hier?
*t
Would you kindly pass me the bukkit? I’ve accidenty my t again.
*pours Lunchbox some t*
There you go.
Thanks, I needed that… Now, what to do with this t-bag?
If it gets heavy, I have somewhere you can rest it.
Thanks, I was getting rather tired hefting all this weight.
Humbugs and wee, then?
I think… I don’t want to post on this one :3
Do i fail when i say: too late?
Yes Tom, you do.
Indubitably.
Inexorably.
Irrefutably.
Indisputably.
Unpardonably.
“Oh here comes Crispy Critters a good wholesome bunch, the low-sugar cereal with lots of crunch! Yes it’s indubitably! Indubitably! Indubitably! Indubitably! Indubitably! Delicious!…Ah-cha-cha-cha!”…
Wow, I can’t believe Grandma still menstruates!
It comes out so coagulated, too.
Have Grandpa give it a stir with his spreader.
He likes his lady marmalade.
I don’t think he’s ready for this jelly.
This is most likely photoshopped. The original probably reads “Tastes just like Grandma’s” and someone photoshopped the ’s out. The lettering isn’t symetrical, but it would be if the ’s was there.
Are you the evil twin of Marius? The one that told all the kids there is no Santa? I just hope you take as much joy in your poopoo party as I do in the knowledge that your kids look just like the milkman.
Did you order cream maam?
He’s The Unborn family secret.
*gets the coat hanger*
*Gets a Mason jar and some sugar*
*gets the meat grinder*
Ooh! Delicatessen!
I think Garius is right. Google the company and you’ll find their product is called “Tastes like Grandma’s.” Could have wiped that “’s” out with Word Paint. The asymmetry gives it away. I wish people would be more selective in who they vote for. Fakers shouldn’t make it.
These things are submitted by people and are voted on by people. If enough people found it funny enough to vote yes, it “makes” it. So instead of faulting failblog, how about faulting the tards that voted yes. Regardless if it is fake, the thought of it is funny and brings on rather comical comments imho. And if you anal retentive asshats are stupid enough to think that most of us don’t get the idea that it has been “doctored”, then you need to enroll in humor 101 classes. Dragon will be taking applications soon for the new semester.
*gets off soapbox*
Ry, next time just send him this link:
http://tizona.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/asshat.jpg
I think I need to add more sections. And make it a prerequisite to posting.
Sheesh.
(and *SNORK!!* @ Lunchbox!)
*applauds*
I tried to say something very similar yesterday but the comment refused to post. Thank you
*cries*
*hands fuzz the shamwow for nose blowing*
Avoid the crusty spots and you will be fine.
*fuzzy’s tears on dilly’s pillow*
Tears on her pillow
Pain in his heart
Caused by you oo-wa-oo . . .
.
You happy now Ashtab?
Lemme guess, you can tell by the pixels?
no no no. It’s the shadows. Or maybe the font. or or the colors don’t match.
There’s one way to tell, but I can’t look at that poor histogram.
Well, he’s seen a few shops in his time.
*Totally crosses PeanutButter and Grandma sandwiches off list. Forever!*
How about PeanutButter and Grandpa’s banana?
I’m gonna need therapy after all this.
Welcome to Failblog. It’s a therapy all its own, guaranteed to make you feel better about yourself. Unless, of course, if you have a mullet haircut.
Or if you’re a dumbass.
I’m ready for my therapy Doctors.
EX-cellent. Now…this will hurt me a lot more than it hurts you. Really.
*gets out the halibut, the bukkit, the innuendo machine, and a margarita*
Well…I don’t want to scare him off, do I?
O.O No one told me it was SHOCK therapy!
Eee! I see this is to be Shock therapy.
O.O Shock Therapy? I like it!
I see the ECT has affected Srrsly’Srry’s serioulsy shoddy short-term memory.
… and I mean SERIOULSY
“Siriusly?” He said doggedly.
“Serially,” he said, murdering all his cheerios.
“Seamingly,” he said, shredding his pants.
“Swiftly”, Tom parroted.
O.O Shock Therapy YAY!
You might scare ‘him’ off but you won’t scare me that easy.
O.O YAY Shock Therapy!
Which is for the Warshaw test, the bukkit or the halibut?
Oh, no. You weren’t trying for Rorschach, were you?
O.O No one told me this was SHOCK therapy!
Obviously it’s not working.
Okay. Time to let Mookie and Ryannon have a go at you.
And it will definitely hurt him more than it hurts us. It’s our job.
Job” Wait, you get paid for this? And all this time I have been settling for free lolcats. That’s it! I’m going to the union rep.
Raelalt, step into my office. I have a copy of the Failblog contract right here, and… let’s see what we can do. I might have to draft a ULP on this one.
LB, I once followed a woman in Wegman’s for 10 minutes so I could snap a picture for friends. She had the penultimate she-mullet. Her front was “feathered” and then had a braid that went all the way down her back past the waist of her jeans. No one would have believed it. The mullet is live and well in Woodbridge NJ.
The she-mullet (BTW I love that term) seems to be a favorite amongst the more masculine lesbians lately around the SF Bay Area. Or does it just seem that way?
I don’t know, I am not a masculine lesbian in the SF Bay Area, but I played one on tv and stayed in a Holiday Inn last night. But I did have a she-mullet not long ago, completely accidenty
That’s what I get for going to a woman that doesn’t speak the same language as I do. Although the top of the mullet was still long, just not long compared to the back. I had to take about 6 inches off to even it up.
Let me guess… Did your hair stylist also sell hats?
Ry, the woman you referred to was at Ft Dix last week, sans the braid. I referenced her when I was talking about the ’80s hair, high-heel boots and jeans, chewing gum, etc… earlier this week.
It is very much that way in Asheville, NC.
They tend to also go with the arm tattoos and the cigarette pack rolled up in their tee-shirt sleeve.
It’s the new “Cry-Baby” model of lesbian.
The Family Fruit Basket LLC part of the Donner Party of fine food products.
“When you think Jam think Donner.”
“When you think frozen remains think Dalhmer!”
P.A. in restaurant: “Donner. Party of four”.
It’s really just Efferdent and Ben-Gay, with a little bourbon for a nice kick.
Once again, like break.com, you resort to obviously fake bullshit for the sake of putting up content rather than using a real FAIL. This place has primarily become fake posts and people trying to one-up another in the comments section. Wonderful.
If you don’t like it, why come to this site?
You weren’t very eloquent there, Ry. I could have done better.
Ha. Neither of you said anything special. I can top that with my eyes closed.
With one more we can make Belgian ROFLs.
*puts a cherry on top*
I hope that isn’t Mookie’s cherry. It is apparently from “the back”.
I needed a build up and had to find my soapbox. I blew my load a couple of minutes later.
Three peckers on your cheeks too, man !
BELGIAN ROFL !!
Ooh. I’ll have mine with whipped cream, please.
Someone’s fail didn’t get posted…
Good Michael & it took you how long to figure this out? 2 maybe 3 minutes to realize this is a loser club and a minute to identify all of them \ next comes the abuse aimed at you
And why would be need real fails when we already have you two?
Hi Amber, you look really nice today. I was wondering what you are doing Friday. Me and the girls are going clubbing and wanted you to come along.
Ok. The jig is up babe. Who are you and what have to done with our Ry?
I was trying a new approach but it apparently isn’t the right approach with these nasty people.
Oh, whew! I thought the pod people had got to you.
You mean you and your boobs? Ha Ha! No thanks I have a man. I don’t need to pick one up at a bar or play out a pretend sex life here. You have fun though.
Wow so much anger. And people wonder why they get slammed on here. Being nice doesn’t pay off or create goodwill, just more jealous anger. Go screw a squirrel.
Careful, both Bob and Em might be offended by that suggestion. I recommend moose, myself.
Trolls always view “nice” through the lens of irony. Because they are so nasty themselves, they automatically assume everyone is as unkind and unpleasant as they are.
I’ll go clubbing with you, Ry.
*gets club*
So. Baby seals? Or should we try something different this time?
I have a couple of small animals in mind, you choose
Uh oh S. Bob. Better run.
Amber: “Ha Ha! No thanks I have a man.”
.
And does your “man” take AA or C batteries?
Pshhh… batteries? Her “man” either plugs into the wall, or has a kick-start motor. No mere battery-laden device could do justice for her!!!
She has to pull the anal beads like a lawnmower, it’s the way to go.
Well then, they should call you Mario!! Cuz u jus got <> (xkcd.com) lol…
Fake or not its funny. If everyone took the time to make others laugh there would be less time for us to kill each other.
and on a side note STFU Mikey
Michael, I have some advice for you. . . SHUT THE F**CK UP AND ENJOY THE FRIKKIN LOL!!!!!!! (and if you dont get off the site and let other people)
mmmm….grammy jam
mmmm….joe mammy’s mammy’s jam
(and her mother was joe’s mammygram)
May I have a core sample of that, please.
Ow. Mammygrams are painful.
Aw, do you need someone to kiss it and make it better?
LB what are you doing Thursday? I have a pelvic exam scheduled and might need some consoling in the LB way.
*clears schedule*
Umm, well, I don’t have anything planned… except maybe you…
*roffle!*
(Which is dragonese for “Yes, please!”)
Gramercy! You’re still waiting for those kisses?
*smoooooooooooch* *smoooooooooooch*
Oh, thank you! I was worried I’d have to draw a diagram so you could find your way.
That won’t be needed, you’ve engendered a mammary engram.
Oh, you know what comes next, right…?
*turns on the gramophone*
♬ MAAAAAAAM-REEEEEEES…!! ♬
… um … candygram
Oh cool!
*opens door*
Grandma’s a fiesty one! enough people know how she taste to use it to describe food now… BEWARE soon your thanksgiving turkey will say “taste like granny” too
And yet, no one has asked how, exactly, Alex’s brother knows how Grandma tastes… Where are Child Social Services when you need them?
they’re at the free tasting!!!
This is a failblog fail. You can see where someone photoshopped this because the title is off center. It was meant to say “Tastes Like Grandma’s”. Pretty crummy fail…FAKE
you spelled “pretty grammy” wrong
Agreed. It’s one of their brand names:
THE FAMILY FRUIT BASKET, LLC
James and Betty Hershberger
985 Augusta Farms Road
Stuarts Draft, VA 24477
540.337.1707
Product(s): Homemade pickles/relishes, fruit jams, apple butter, made in small individual batches. No artificial colors or preservatives.
Brand Name(s): The Family Fruit Basket, Tastes Like Grandma’s
W, MO
Hershberger’s fruit basket tastes like grandma’s?
I’ll take your word on that.
Do they make nut sacks too?
Applebags are their specialty.
Dear small business owners, please stop putting your f*cking kids on your packaging. No one thinks they’re cute but you.
I like your thinking.
I think you’re liking…
a *squeeeze*!!
Eeeeeee!
I’m thinking you’re right.
*squeeze*
Are you thinking what I’m thinking?
I think so, but this time, you put the trousers on the chimp.
Yes Brain, but me and Pipi Longstocking? I mean, what would the kids look like?
This reminds me of a company that used to be a small chain but now consists of a single location in Virginia. It’s called Grandma’s Buns.
“The Family Fruit Basket, LLC” is listed with an address in Stuarts Draft, VA … which is outside Waynesboro … which is, no kidding, where my own sweet granny lies at rest … or, at least, did until now …
__()__
You never know.
Shopped. Poster removed the apostrophe and s.
Tastes like’s Grandma?
That don’t make sense.
Nah, he/she meant “Homemade’s Jam”
totally, and it’s even a Shop fail at that. I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation.
Com on people! I’m not here to be a debbie-downer but is it to much to ask to have some LEGIT fails?
Like there aren’t any left in this world? The earth is one big fail
And you are its king! Go you!
…No really. I’m not being ironic. Go.
Yeah, and take your dog with you!
Hi, did anyone see Marley and Me yet?
I read the book and not a big fan of book to movie success.
books and me don’t get along; so i watch the movie of everything instead of reading only 2 pages, doing something else and getting back to it 3 days after
That is sad in so many ways.
I much prefer books over movies. But I do cheat. I read the last couple of chapters first before really delving into the book. I want to know the ending before I get there. Ever since I saw LB naked, I have been anti-surprise, no matter how big the surprise turns out to be.
I film myself turning the pages of the book so I can watch it later.
I always read the book before the movie, it’s so much better. But one success in book-to-screen was Holes by Louis Sachar. You should see it, it’s a fun movie that’s also deep in places.
[q] “I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation.” [/q]
…why didn’t you then?
“I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation.”
… so why didn’t you?
quote – I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation.
… so why didn’t you then?
quote – I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation.
…. why didn’t you then?
” I could have at least centered the title to cause less speculation. ”
… well why didn’t you then?
makes it failworthy IMO
Grandma had just finished watching Hudsucker Proxy, jumped out of the window and jellied up the sidewalk.
The jam is, you know, for kids!
‘Shopped! I live in VA, and have seen this on the shelves. The apostrophe and S have been edited out… BTW, Grandma says hi!
I’m sorry, my brain was scrambled when I looked at this. I thought you said “The apostrophe, S, and I have lived on the shelves.”
tomacco lol
THE FAMILY FRUIT BASKET, LLC
James and Betty Hershberger
Stuarts Draft, VA
Product(s): Homemade fruit jams, apple butter, pickles/relishes, made in small individual batches. No artificial colors or preservatives.
Brand Name(s): The Family Fruit Basket, Tastes Like Grandma’s
This is photo shopped!!!
Oh shoot, someone beat you to the punch. Sorry, maybe next time? Tell ya what, you post a shopped picture and we will comment on it and make sure you can be the first to tell us it is shopped. Does that sound fair?
Just when did Photoshop get to be a verb?
It’s actually “shoop” in its verb form. Not kidding.
Should we not consider the label printing fail option before we jump to shopped conclusions? Don’t stop digging now. I want to know the truth.
I feel like the fail lies more in the three dudes you can see in the reflection, all crowded up on top of each other, giggling at their half-cocked plan for clever photoshoppery. Really, guys? It’s that exciting for you?
Oh my god this DOES taste like Grandma!
Dammit…I just now thought of the “Tomacco” episode of the Simpsons.
“Ew! This tastes like Grandma!”
“My god, it DOES taste like Grandma!”
“I WANT MORE!”
Ha Ha yur right!
Shouldn’t this actually be Tomacco Jam?
buba remembers when he was 7 and tasted his grandma…
Dang, Buba, yer not suppozdte tell nobody! Dontcha ‘member Granpa sayin’ it wuz a secret?
LOL There was a Simpsons episode where they were selling mutated tomatos. There was this guy with a kid. Kid tastes it:
- Heyy. This tastes like grandma!
- Lemme see? Mmmm It DOES taste like grandma… can I have a few more of those?
(Sorry, I have to do this – can’t hold it in any longer.)
grama haz a flavr?.
I’m glad you did that. I had just about giving up resisting.
“Tastes like Grandma” (after she got run over by the reindeer?)
.
I’m guessing that in 400+ posts someone already said something like that, but I’m saying it anyway!
Nope, nobody referenced that yet. Congratulations!
Its not a centered title. Most of the other things on this site are real.. but this one is not legit. I can still see part of the S at the end.
Actually, Grandma tastes like Depend undergarments… blech.
i love big butts and i cannot lie
You other brothers can’t deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
‘Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she’s wearing
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Someone photoshopped an ’s away. Lamish.
that would be another fail though.
Tastes like grandma under the arm.. xD
They make soylent green too.
I wonder if they have Grandson Blueberry flavor as well?
oh no poor grandma. waste not want not i suppose. must have one gnarly aftertaste though.
FAIL…. you can tell that somebody photoshopped the “s” out of “Grandma’s”… “Tastes like Grandma’s”… not funny when it’s fake.
i wouldnt mind tasting grandma:D
Photoshopped; I’ve seen that jelly irl, it actually says “grandma’s”.
LOL, cannibalistic soda!
I can tell where the S has been photoshopped out.
Also posted at http://www.jumpinginpools.blogspot.com
That’s Ralph Wiggum right there.
I SAW IT!
Oh wait, I’m on the wrong website.
This is from the Simpsons. The episode where they grow “Tomacco”. Ralph takes a bite and says “This tastes like Grandma”.
Simpsons did it.
Tomacco.
What can we possibly do when a label decides to drop 12 original and brand new hardcore anthems on our ears in one go? Bundle them up and offer you them all with a credit crunch busting saving! In the last few weeks this label has attacked TID with an non stop slew of superb high octane anthems and we urge you to collect them all now. Euphoria!
its photoshopped….it really says “tastes like grandmas”
i can tell cuz the t in tastes comes down farther then the last a in grandma…the person obviously whited the s out
WTF
is he pointing out “tastes like grandma” or “black raspberry” ‘cuz i can see a fail in both