Submitted by Ryan M
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Recent Failures in Communications
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Cheezburger Company Blog
Happy new year everybody!
i am second.
you are suckond
Snake : This is Snake. Colonel, can you hear me?
Campbell : Loud and clear Snake. What’s the situation?
Snake : Looks like the elevator in the back is the only way up.
!
!
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!?
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!?#
!?#@
¿
qb{[(\>!¿?i</)]}dp
¡1ɹǝʍʞs ʎ11ıs ǝuo ǝɹ,noʎ
HAY! How you does that?
I tried spinning the keyboard around and that didn’t work!
fail… spinning your key board around won’t do any thing… if you must know itt’s a font
Reaaaaallllly? No duh! Sarcasm fail.
Penal Code
perv.
perv.
double comment fail
The pup’s too young for language like that, my dear …
I don’t know, it has already dealt with bones before!
Then I guess failacio is not out of line.
Spelling fail. It’s spelled “fellatio”
he was saying FAILlatio.. my god how is it that im explaining this.
oh… do you mean fellatio deary?
That’s the problem with schools today. They don’t teach beastiality to the children early enough.
So true. It’s sad, actually.
TEEHEE
actually sweetie it IS beastiality
i m gonna rape u i have a small penis but i like using tweezers to wank it over man ass
you still got an ‘a’ in your version.
epic fail
And the funniest part is that somebody actually answered his question…
If you read the actual replies, they are not taking this guy seriously at all.
In fact, answer page for that question reminds me of failblog
I don’t know what’s hotter – your computer knowledge or the way you made sweet love to my Maltipoo.
I can hardly wait until the Maltipoo has the right age to learn about kinky sex.
Wow, you don’t consider what you did kinky? I’m still waiting for her hair to grow back, and I’m getting her fitted for a glass eye.
I can explain… I made a mistake and used Mikey’s glue instead of the lube.
PETA Tom is not gonna like this.
Yes, I am glad (and safe) he prefers donkeys and horses.
Is Tom from Enumclaw, WA?
this is an answered question? What was the answer??
I could tell you if only I had Internet access!
I just photocopied the screen and then cut out the bit that covered the answers.
Can you put the photocopy in an envelope and e-mail it to me?
I’ve run out of stamps. Hang on, I have some glue so should be able to paste it on the internet for you all to see.
I can email you some staples if the glue does not work.
I’m working on some post-it notes! -takes notes-
Hmm. I folded it up and put it in the disk drive and then clicked on ‘open file’ to upload it back to the computer and it wouldn’t.
I think the problem is that one page doesn’t make a file.
Here Mikey, I’ll lend you this folder and we’ll see if that works.
Hang on, no need to sully your hands with this work. I’m your assistant after all.
BTW, I’ve got this newspaper and some nice lemon pledge. Let me clear your cache for you while you wait.
Ooh, me thinks Christopher is looking for a raise
I’m sure you can help him get a leg up, McFail.
McFail, if you fax it to me, I promise to fax it back so you can still keep the original.
That won’t work. Without the green header, it cannot be verified to have not been photoshopped.
Well I guess I’ll have to scan it to PDF format and have it couriered to you Mookie.
Be careful, the postman might bend the envelope!
Remember to fold it in half first to preserve the confidentiality of the contents
Maybe he means breeding and I guess he speaks dog.
Either that or he has a jar of peanut butter that he is just dying to use.
Should I teach my turtle?
I like turtles!
A little too much. You should wait until they are old enough to have been educated and stop taking advantage of them.
*SQUEEZES the moomin*
*shows up in a pirate costume*
ARRRRRRRR!
*squeeeeeeeeeeeeze!*
*stomps away on peg leg*
Turtles are always hard.
Win!
The genus Trionychidae lacks “horny [sic] scutes.”
*crosses Trionychidae out of little black book*
Why is your little black book got the words “Complete biology” written across it hmmm?
$20 says the asker was the masturbating-burglar-mushroom guy.
30$ says that that guy’s dog already knew a lot more about sex than it would had liked to know.
$40 says that Lou’s dog-father didn’t get educated before he met Lou’s cat-mother.
$50 says he knew downward dog pose afterwards.
Hey, I just found myself $50.
Nowadays dogs start downloading pr0n very young.
Probably the only thing you can teach him now is that in real life you better use a condom.
Well, Lou, let’s get the catdog perspective. When did your owner starting raping you?
Right after declawing me.
But afterwards my owner buy me some jewelry (well, I hope a catdog collar qualify as jewelry)
Depends on how shiny it is…
It has my name engraved on it, this makes me happy enough (well, I hope a piece of paper with some letters scribbled on it qualifies as engraving)
*feeds Lou some mushrooms*
Oh, how nice!
I find so romantic being invited to have lunch before the action.
And I got us a room at our favorite motel with the weekly rapes. I’ll bring the picnic supplies, you bring the ham sandwiches.
*pouts* Well, that’s no fun…
Well, I will change my mind… if you remember to remove me the gag.
*replaces gag with something feline*
Cat’s eye?
Lion’s mane?
Argh, I meant catnip, CATNIP!!! *sob*
Cool status: revoked
Lol I remember that one!
time to teach my pet chinchillas now
Always neuter and spay your pets people.
Woohooo! Showcase Showdown!
I bid ONE DOLLAR.
Always neuter and spay your pet’s people.
Oh, and it would be difficult to both neuter and spay your pets. At least most pets.
Unless it is a catdog like lou. He takes “in touch with his feminine side” to a whole new level.
Heh heh. He once touched my feminine side.
All of your sides are feminine
Of Dice and Men
The die is cast.
Please to continue touching… Don’t forget the in-side.
Hah, the guy actually had an answer to this?
Now I’m curious to hear what it is (It’s probably something like ‘you’re weird’ but oh well.)
You’re weird…
but oh well.)
Best Answer – Chosen by Voters
Right after you pick it up at the vet when you have it fixed. Tell it “Sorry my friend, ain’t gonna happen”!
1 year ago
there’s the answer for everyone who is too lazy to search it on yahoo answers
If you’re going to look it up for us why shouldn’t I be lazy and
let you do it?
so nobody said 12 or 13?
That’s about the age young dog owners start to get all uncontrollably frisky and shit.
Gotta start early! Can’t teach an old dog new tricks…
I tried to click the ‘Report Abuse’ button but it didn’t work.
I wouldn’t mind being “abused” in that particular fashion…
;o
If he keeps calling me a dog I’m not gonna go out with him anymore.
You’re not going to lay down and play dead?
I like it when she rolls over and begs.
Don’t mess with Mookie, her bark is not worse than her bite.
Indeed.
If you don’t want me to bite, Chris, stop waving that bone in my face.
It’s not a bone, it’s kibbles and bits.
Apparently you’ve been spoiled…
I’ll appreciate it if you only nibble, Mookie. I haven’t gotten any experience raping yet, and I need it to land this sweet job.
Christopher! Are you applying for other positions!?
Reverse-cowgirl position not good enough for him anymore, I guess.
personally, i’m kind of curious as to how the person who posted this fail stumbled across it in the first place…
Come on, this is sooo fake. Failblog is really failing the last few weeks.
Do you ever saw a fake QUESTION?!? Sorry, but that’s simply impossible.
why the fails are repeating? i’ve seen this before.
You can’t have!
This is an original fail!
HOW DARE YOU FALSELY ACCUSE FAILBLOG!
*incurs wrath*
/pkon
Makes me wonder if this was posted by my former boss. So sad when people start truly believing their pets are children. Easily identifiable by their bumper stickers: “My (retriever / dalmation / shitzu) is smarter than your honor student.”
Yahoo Answers is a FAIL as a resource for anything. One could make a whole site of just idiotic Yahoo Answers questions and answers. Enough already, FAIL blog. You’re usually quite amusing. To choose submissions from Yahoo Answers is really going with some low-hanging fruit.
Toastie, some of the fails are so low hanging they touch the ground!
Compared to othe more, ‘buffoonish’ fails, this is nothing!
Do your fails hang low, do they wobble to and fro…?
Can you fail them in a knot, can you fail them in a bow?
*ties failthread in a knot with her tongue*
Durdy gurl!
Golly!
Golly! Golly! Golly!
Did you SEE that? Golly! Golly!
Golly! Golly! Golly!
Golly!
why is this a fail? the guy is clearly not serious. this is stupid.
The guy must be serious!
Would u post a question when u dont want it answered!?!
Or post a question when u dont want a dog? or cat? sex?
*slaps mooo9123 *
Get a hold of yourself!
You know, just get your dog neutered. And yourself as well. You’re too stupid to breed.
You should comment on the Yahoo Answers site, not here. Do you honestly think he came here to get read the answers to his fail? Better advice would be to get a wire hanger for his girlfriend/wife.
Before this happens: http://failblog.org/?s=wii+fail
Ahh, when we were but Wii f’loggers …
.
Bit of history for the youngsters: Scornflakes has called back a Fail (from August of [what's left of] this year) that was one that originally broke our browsers (800+ comments) and utlimately brought about measures to limit the number of comments per page to 200.
.
So, be sure to always practice safe beastiality.
FWIW the conspiracy fail now has 1306 comments.
I can even click ‘Show All’ without crashing my br
Dr Doolittle uses Yahoo Answers for the first time.
“Tell him a dirty joke and if he gets it, it’s time. If he doesn’t laugh, then it’s okay to wait awhile longer.”
It is a SHE! I’m not GAY!
It’s 42
Do to think he would use the fail ham for demonstrations?
He’s obviously too young to be a teacher.
maybe 1 year old
hahaha it’s very funny
lol it says “report abuse”
Yahoo! Answers is just one giant collection of FAIL of every sort.
WAY too easy to find submissions on there.
Yeah, I agree. By the way, did you ever get your answer on whether dogs prefer chunky or smooth peanut butter during sex ed classes?
RED ROCKET! RED ROCKET, Sparkie!
I believe this would be a troll.
yes, a VERY troll-ish thing to say.
Not sure if anyone actually looked up the actual page but look what the last comment is:
“u obviously just copied this question straight off of fail blog becos the exact (word for word) same question has been asked on here before”
This isn’t sex-ed fail.. This is a Troll Win.. this post right here. Dumbasses
When is the right age..?
man what a weak submission and yet im commenting and yea u guyz are gay
Trust me, guys – this isn’t the worst one on there…
What a lonely guy, he needs to go adopt a kid
I actually saw that question on answers. lol
hi
It’s funny, because I searched for this on Yahoo and TWO different people asked this exact question.
LOL! so funny! I hope they weren’t serious.
is it a girl or a boy? if its a boy, then i think he can figure it out. if its a girl, im sure she will fined out
Re-read what you just typed.
Did that make any sense?
More fake Yahoo Answers. They just never get any funnier.
WHEN YOUR HEAD IS FIXED.
He meant his God. He’s been alive forever, but where would he learn to have sex?
who would write this?
i want to hump firgy really bad
Hey! Wonderful post! But the site has been loading pretty slowly.
I delight in, cause I discovered exactly what I was taking a look for. You’ve ended my 4 day lengthy hunt! God Bless you man. Have a great day. Bye