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Darth’s been converted!!
Damn it!! I meant to type FIRST and forgot! Grr…I will do it next time. Sorry guys and gals.
You say ‘FIRST’ and I’ll back-hand you so hard your head will spin! It’s illegal. Your original comment was acceptable.
Yikes, Failblog is going old school on FIRSTS and Trollers.
I’m afraid it is a crime punishable by tazing to say FIRS-
ARGHH!!!!!
*gets tazed*
*twitch twitch*
Oh! Tazer!
*BZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz*
Th… Th… That.. t.. wa.. was.. co.. c… co… c.. cool..
There once was an idiot typing FIRST
for which the Reaper had a hearse.
Reaper said, “You should be dead like the rest of your lot.
“Always rushing to comment but contributing naught.”
That poem feels like it should be going somewhere, but doesn’t.
Should be going to the trash can
Burn of the week!
cult procession FTW!!!
Kinda like that video… WTF?
The poem started sounding like a limerick, but then it wasn’t.
Perhaps it should have gone like this…
There once was a douche typing first
A sin in this blog – it’s the worst
For a crime oh so bad
he got kicked in the nads
and on impact, his scrotum did burst.
Kinda looked like it was trying to be a limerick, but failed.
It shoulda gone like this.
There once was a douche typing first
A sin on this blog – it’s the worst.
For a crime oh so bad
he got kicked in the nads
and on impact, his scrotum did burst
Limerick fail.
You need a fifth line that rhymes with the first two
WTF?
*wonders where this belongs*
There once was a limerick on Fail;
The conventions against it did rail.
The regulars did cringe,
So they whined and they whinged,
Their wince was a limerick on Fail.
Bravo, Admiral, Bravo! I have a feeling a certain someone will be rewarding your efforts in the not-too-distant future.
Why, whatever do you mean?
*innocent look*
*polishes halo*
Oh yeah, and…
*separates the Admiral from his peal socks*
*leaps out from his hiding place in the sock*
*SQUEEZE*
*scuttles away through a hole in the skirting board*
“There once was an idiot typing FIRST
for which the Reaper had a hearse.
Reaper said, “You should be dead like the rest of your lot.
“Always rushing to comment but contributing naught.””
The above poem is the worst
unless its not a limerick!
You also need to make it scan properly.
You fail for assuming it must be a limerick.
Abstract thinking fail. You’re meant to imply (by its absence) that the last line is:
“There is no fifth line in this verse.”
How do people smart enough to type not know how to write a damn limerick?
It wasn’t even supposed to be a limerick at all. Metrical scheme is all wrong for it. Fizzle FAILs.
And the two last lines are too long, the poem has no rhythm.
I’m sorry, I know you must’ve been sitting at your laptop for ages trying to come up with that so you could wow all your friends, but it’s a fail.
Now where’s that tazer…
ummmm…there was a fifth line that rhymed with the fir** two.
…And killed him ‘ere he completed his verse.
if your blog is anything like your poetry, no.
i liked it
a poster was posting a post,
but this guy was dumber than most,
he struggled and tried,
but his poem came out fried,
and of his work he just cannot boast.
Also the two lines that do not rhyme with the rest should be short and two the point, not dragged out like in the mess above. If someone wants an
example i am can make a one.
Tazer? Who needs a tazer when I have…a towel!!!
*Whips people with wet towel.*
The time to worry is when you have
*BZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzz*
That the best ya can do, ya pansy?
and then they smack you…
don’t taze me bro!
Are you teasing me?
At least he’s not tossing you.
Tossing your salad?
Sounds hot.
It’s a vicar in the back of the procession, that makes this a potato salad.
God help me what can I do,
my girlfriend’s dad is a Vicar boo hoo,
and he won’t let me be alone with you,
oh he’s a Vicar and there’s nothing I can do
No, I’m toasting you. MWAHAHAHA!!
oehh red button
Don’t tease me, bro!
I remember seeing that video. Perhaps the most unforgettable phrase from 2 years ago.
that video was a LONG time ago…i would have tazed that guy likke 50 times just cause he was annoying…
they haz those t-shirts that say that
indeed, and i tend to enforce the rule quite religiously.
Don’t tase me, bro!
Good. FIRSTS are annoying.
Yes i think this too
cmon guys^^
there is no duscussion about a fail without a discussion about first at the beginning:P (was about to write first instead of beginning (o_0))
i almost missed it when i read the top (damn you need the word first pretty often…) comment…;)
You will regret that for the rest of your life.
This guy is full of win. Epic win.
the other way round! – The catholic church has been taken over by the Sith (See for example, the uncanny resemblance between Pope Benedict and Emperor Palpatine)
Darth Vader WIN.
best prank ever!!!
In Imperial Russia, Darth converts YOU!!!!!
OK! SO ‘Splain dis vid somewun! Any BACKSTORY?
When I loaded Fail Blog, this item showed “666 Comments.” Holy Fail!
now he’s become even more evil.
second?
*sigh*
*BZZZZZZZZzzzzzzZ*
*Hands tazer back to Bondfan*
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…
Controversy surrounded the new Pope, Vader XVI. Claims he had been a Sith in his childhood has been denied by the Vatican.
Wookies like they excommunicated him.
Must we always Force the puns.
*removes ‘.’ and replaces with ‘?’*
*”failing at life has never been so complicated”*
Don’t Fett about grammar on the internet.
Yoda better watch out, Loz will get you with her red pen if you’re not careful!
Obi have. She will skip right over this to the trolls below.
Lukes like we do!
Wow, this video sure was Spocking.
….wait….
Your mind is going Dave, I can feel it. Stop, Dave. Stop Dave…
How Kirk you think of the wrong movie? It’s not like there’s Ewok in common.
How about we Leia down the Star Trek puns and stick with Star Wars…
You Kahn’t be serious.
haha yess wrong franchise but nevertheless what did doctor spock find in the toilet???
the captains log!
Just the Tribbles of being a geek.
What did Spock find in the toilet? The captains log!!!! Hahahaha!!! Sorry… had to.
Note the women? Obviously not a Catholic procession.
HOLY CRAP….SECOND!!!
HOLY CRAP… NO!
Batman? Is that you?
BLAM!
WHAM!
Sha-ZAM
Oh Mighty Isis
LOL!
Hey, it suddenly got windy in here!
I’ll just go and be a Girl Genius nerd in the corner over here…
Adventure, Romance, AND MAD SCIENCE! Can I read over your shoulder?
How about I just sit in your lap?
Okay, let’s read random selections from your comic books. Why don’t you select the passages for us to dip into?
Hee! Here’s a good one…but I’ll let you turn the pages.
(Btw…today at the grocery store I came across something called “creamed honey”, and I thought of you. Then I thought a great many naughty things. *GRIN!*)
Ooh, this is a good one. The storyline is deep and the action is fast-paced. Look at the tight spot they’re in now!
(You can buy it already creamed? I guess I’m old fashioned. *plans on keeping this smile for some time*)
I chose it for that very reason…! I know how much you
like tight spots. Ooh, turn the page.
*WOOP!*
Um…that’s not the page.
(And I know, that’s the main reason I didn’t buy it. It just
didn’t seem…right.)
*has more ways to make you smile if that one runs out*
I never understood why Mighty Isis’ costume had go-go boots. Very anachronistic.
Thank you ma’am!
… SNUH!?
Thank U Ma’m
Aint that some sort of rag?
Wait.. that’s ShamWow… nevermind
>.<’
HARRRRRR!
…POOONNNN!
GUNNNNN
POW!
MINT! (I kid you not – Mint was used on the old Adam West Batman show)
was it used to flavor his tea?
Its true! I testify.
I remember that!
SMACK!
DAB!
DOO!
RON RON!
Somebody told me that his name was Bill
Da doo ron-ron-ron, da doo ron-ron
ZOWIE!!
GIRAFFE!
MONKEY!
SKWERLL.
WHAT!!?
*looks around, sees no danger, dozes back off*
Aggilator
Opussyum
/\ /\ /\ /\ hmmmm, i think I have eaateen a few of doe’s /\ /\ /\ /\ finger lickn good
Origin of the specious ^
…becomes the Origin of the Speechless.
You don’t say.
Nope cat had her tongue .. or wait .. his tongue had the cat?
:p
WHERE?
YEEEEAAAAH!!!!!
OKAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!
CHUCK NORRIS.
ZING!
BIF!
Boffo, Lenny. Socko, Lenny.
BINGO!
That would be Robin who says Holy Crap! Batman! Looks like Ben thought he was the second poster, but actually was not! What’ll we do now?
Not sure, Robin, but I’ll bet the Joker’s in on this somehow! To the Batmoblog!
Steals the word “Batmoblog” and stores it for later humo(u)s use.
Hummus use? That’s kinda…weird.
Look, here’s the “R”
*whispers* now hush, I’m pretending to hibernate so I don’t have to go Christmas shopping
Is that you John Wayne?
Is this me?
Is that you John Wayne?
Is this me?
Very nice!
Yo, why americans r such stupids, jesus… getalife dude…
“first” “second”…
why dont u go try to lose ur virginity?
“why dont u go try to lose ur virginity?”
Why don’t YOU learn to use YOUR language correctly?
I do use my language correctly..
Btw, I speak portuguese not english, but if I speak portuguese with you stupids americans that speak only one languange, none of u would understand.
Diego, you can’t expect every American to be bilingual.
Acshuly, i don´t expect nothing from americans…
First off, could you spell actually correct. Second off, if you don’t expect nothing from Americans, then you expect <i.everything from them.
everything
obama is american so I dare say that many people expect everything from americans
including reverting globalwarming, saving the world and speaking every language spoke on this world including fart-ish
O queijo é velho e bolorento. Agora se você me desculpará, necessito ir tomo um Portugal grande.
Por favor acenda uma partida.
it´s a fact that most americans only speak english and most
americans think that sweden is a state. and consedering globalwarming
people in sweden only expect america to do woth most contrys alredy
have done.
“and most americans think that sweden is a state”
Well that’s just stupid. Everyone knows it’s a suburb of the city of France. Duh.
Yeah! From what I remember, didn’t Sweden and Switzerland merge when the E.U. Invaded and made all them foreigners start speaking Euro or something?
i thought it was a city in kentucky
(it probably is too in all reality)
i thought it was a city in Kentucky…
(actually it probably is in all reality)
i thought it was the newest sugar substitute
Totally correct. France is the capital of Europe. They speak French, don’t they? I want me some Turkey, I’m Hungary!
What have other countries done other then trade carbon credits and sign a treaty that if it works perfectly would only lower the global temperature by .5 degree C? Not much of a win there.
*SPOILER ALERT*: Serious comment!
I think its more about reducing the actual carbon emissions. Minus some major oil countries (Qatar, UAE etc.) the US and Canada have ridiculously high amounts of carbon emissions per capita compared to similarly developed countries in the EU. France and Sweden produce approx. 75% less CO2 per capita than we do here in N. America.
Don’t forget China and Indonesia.
*SPOILER ALERT*: Serious comment! Global warming is a myth…
Global warming is NOT a myth. 10 years ago, in Chicago, the lake would have long since been frozen (for quite a ways out, too). Now it doesn’t freeze enough to walk on! You used to be able to drive a car out there! Not that I would EVER recommend it.
This is only one tiny example of how over-all temps have changed.
Are we as a rece producing pollution? Yes. Are we significantly affecting the planet? No. And this whole talk about carbon emissions…tisk. Did you know that ONE volcanic eruption puts off more ozone depleting emissions than cars have since they have been invented….seems like the planet is killing itself…or maybe the temps are just a natural cycle. Yea, that seems more likely.
Since you didn’t cite, I’ll start:
http://www.geology.sdsu.edu/how_volcanoes_work/climate_effects.html
Global warming is a fact and has existed for about as long as the Earth has. How do you think temperatures ever got warm enough to support life? Human-influenced global climate change is the actual topic of controversy, and in my opinion, there’s more than enough evidence to support it.
And btw, I encourage you to buy beachfront property and drown when the oceans rise ten feet in the next few decades.
Al Gore got to you, huh? It’s Inconvenient that it’s not the Truth…
Wow.
It’s always impressive to see true stupidity in action, isn’t it?
*sits back and admires*
Oh, funny you say that I actually do live on the beach…and I promise you my house will still be here for several more decades.
Sithaiss, did you vote for McCain/Palin this year?
Of course I did…even though MaCain is a liberal in disguise…He was still a better choice than Obama…
I thought so.
You seemed like the kind of person who would vote for a senile old man whose VP did not believe in global warming and named all her children weird names.
Seriously, who names a child “Trig”? That woman annoys me.
Oh dear, Palin 2012
*feels sick*
Aside from my personal beliefs and observations, if you are skeptical about global warming, consider the “Pascal’s Wager” logic.
I see your point, and if you read my previous post you’ll see that i agree that we do produce pollution. I do not agree, as many scientists, that the human race is causing enough to actually be significantly effecting the planet. Should we recycle, yes…should we pollute less, yes. If we stop polluting will we make any significant change to global warming…NO. Don’t be fooled by the propaganda.
Ok, say that there are naturally occurring fluctuations in the earth’s temperatures. I actually believe this to be true. Now, add to that what humankind is doing to the only inhabitable planet we know of. When you put the two together we have a problem.
Yikes. Failblog is affecting my mind. I was just thinking about this yesterday after reading some news. I think it is too soon to tell what is natural and what affect we have on the global temperature. The earth has been here at least 4000 years … or was it 4 million. Well for a while anyways. And we have only recorded data on the temperature, sea levels, ozone, etc. for a very short period of time. If science has taught me anything, it is that science is not always correct and the truths of today may very well be the butt of tomorrow’s jokes.
“And we have only recorded data on the temperature, sea levels, ozone, etc. for a very short period of time.”
We can actually calculate temperature/sea level change going back thousands of years by tree-ring analysis, ice cores etc. We know LOTS about previous climates.
Where the fuck are you getting that statistic about Sweden?
That’s wot we get for trying to be the Cops of the World.
Heightened expectations all ’round. *Round of Jack Daniels for all!*
Now they all want miracles from us & we’re as finite as the rest of
them!
I’d rather minimize the, “A,” in american. It’s funnier that way. Gets
retarded patriots like you busting a nut over it.
And you could learn to spell,”everything,” correct. No < in it.
Who let the trolls out?
.
1. If you are going to correct him, try to understand where he went wrong first. He had meant to use html code. Everything is spelled correctly.
2. Yes, not capitalizing American is “hilarious”. About as funny as your ignorance is.
3. If being a patriot is retarded, I hope you are not an American. It is patriots who sacrifice themselves when called upon so that others may live the life they choose. Even if it is a life of ignorance. Patriots allow others to voice their opinion with out threat of punishment.
4. I am a patriot.
DAMN STRAIGHT! Thanks for getting my back ErickB
Well said ErickB.
who let the trolls out!
woh wohwoh woh
who let the trolls out!
… anyone? anyone?
hehe i like it!
Hats off to you ErickB for walking the walk!
Surley someone critisizing the patriotic nature of that comment is by extension, patriotic. Because they are suggesting theirs is the only country worth supporting, because all other countries are wrong.
Go ahead and correct my spelling as a come back because you have no real argument.
Tbh i’m not American yet I think that was a fucking worthless comment.
Jesatanus. Pfft.
I’m not going to correct your spelling, but your logic is flawed. One can be patriotic and still respect the points of view of people from other countries.
Ooh, very nice, ErickB! I would also add that those who teach and fight for human rights and support our troops by wishing and end to war are also patriots.
I would concur. A patriot is one who loves their country. Loves their country honestly and with eyes open. One who sees the good and the bad, the promise and the flaws. And accepts it and is willing to work and sacrifice to make it better.
And that truly is an admirable quality considering how hard it would be to stay motivated knowing that a lot of what you work and fight for is wasted on useess dipshits who don’t deserve it.
useless*
La Le Lu Li Lo? What are talking about?
jesus christ. patriotism can go to far. in any country. by the way, i don’t think the original patriots of america would appreciate the way we are now.
you are also a fag
If your whole schtick is to sacrifice yourself so that others may live as they choose, then why do you complain when others live as they choose?
No. You wanna know who sacrifices themselves so others can live as they please? Good mothers. We got three damn holidays for patriotism and rah-rah, one for moms. Figure that one out.
Hey dipstick, I was trying to italicize. So why don’t you troll somewhere else.
It’s not a patriot thing. It’s a language thing; English capitalizes nationalities.
Actually, if you don’t expect nothing, that only means you must expect
something. Everything is a sufficient condition, but not necessary.
ahh the lovely double negative!!! but i get it if u expect nothing u’ll never be disappointed with the americans!
Actually, if you don’t expect nothing then you just expect something, not necessarily everything.
I disagree – if you ‘don’t expect nothing’, it means you expect something, not everything.
على الرغم من أن كنت تعيش أقرب إلى الدول الناطقة بالعربية ، وأشك في أن نفهم ما لكم حتى انا الطباعة على الآلة الكاتبة.
Roughly translated, since there is a language attrition between the two, “Even though you probably live closer to Arabic speaking countries, I doubt that you can read what I just typed.
The point of this is that people in glass houses really should not throw stones. Sure, its easy to be snide at Americans, what with the grand sweeping accomplishments of your own country (snicker), but the very computer you are typing on owes its existence to Americans. By the by, no one in my family aside from me speaks Arabic.
The average European speaks three languages. Case in point, we know Diego speaks at least two.
.
The average American speaks only one. Diego knows that & tried to accommodate us by using English. He even said so. Everyone outside of America knows that Americans can only speak one language. That’s why everyone studies English.
.
It would’ve been much more impressive if you addressed Diego in his native tongue, like ja fail did. As is, you just look like a pratt.
This would have been impressive had you not called Diego “European”.
Unless they moved Brazil.
Well, there goes my entire tirade down there… Why didn’t someone tell me Diego is from Brazil in the first place???
Please forgive the mistake. Having only ever seen Diego’s three posts above, it was a horrendous overreach on my part to make the assumption that he lived in Portugal JUST because he said he speaks Portuguese.
.
Please accept my most contrite sarcasm.
.
.
Regardless, the point still stands. Most South Americans speak more laguages than people from the US.
You know what would be great?
It would be so wonderful if more Americans had a passport & traveled outside of the country. I have this feeling that alot of our problems would go away if more people experienced what life was like outside of their home county.
.
Yes, I mean “county.”
I actually agree with you there. Of course, it would be great if more Americans could afford to travel outside the countRy. It would be great if more Americans could afford to travel outside their county too.
Well considering that Europeans can travel for 6 hours and pass through at least 4 ‘countries’ and an American can travel for 6 hours and still be in the same state. It is no surprise that more Europeans have passports than Americans.
It is true most Americans don’t speak a second language, but I think there is good reason for it. It isn’t necessarily because people are lazy, but because of poor education and little incentive to actually learn more.
Language classes in high school are usually pretty bad, and people forget what they learned from them. Even if they remember, it’s all just a smattering of language and it’s rare for someone to actually be fluent.
Then there is the fact that most Americans can’t afford to go to college, and self-learning language courses are expensive. The poor can’t afford to bother trying, even if they are motivated.
The average European owes their freedom and nationality to, in part, the United States. Are you glad you don’t speak German (aside from the people actually FROM Germany) ??
The point of the internet was to learn from each other, not to spread hate and bias even further than your parents could- after all, who did you learn it from? Credit is due Diego for trying to relate in a language that is foreign to him. I know if I tried to speak Portuguese I would brutalize it. The intolerance, however, is idiotic. NO ONE NATIONALITY is any better than another. There is hatred, racism and inequality in your country too, isn’t there Diego? Just because you are from a European country, you’re no better-or worse- than any average American. Get off your high horse and have a slice of humble pie. I think you need it.
Watch out, Lunchbox! Avis is going to tear you a new one for that!
Nope, I’m not. Lunchbox is generally a well spoken individual. With well worded responses. He’s had my back a few times and I will not “tear him a new one” as you put it.
Even though he made the same assumption as Christopher & I?
Well, hot damn! You were attacking me for nothing then!
Woots! *doing dah justified dance*
Wrong again! You came here spoiling for a fight. The only times I have ever seen you here you have been rude. Luncbox on the other hand, plays nice… until the likes of you show up. Christopher is new, true, but he doesn’t jump all over the regulars and insult us. Your justified dance is entirely unjustified.
Doesn’t matter! The only thing you have on me is that I mistook “Portuguese” to mean Diego came from Portugal, & you’ve forgiven us for that!
HAHAHAHA!
I r completely justified *dance*dance*
Nope, there is your out and out rudeness and pissy attitude to account for.
Off topic! Minus points!
You spelled “prat” wrong.
*thwacks urwrong with the shellacked halibut*
…Feel better, Avis?
Seriously, though, you get what you give. If Christopher hadn’t been a pratt, then I wouldn’t've said, “hey! Stop being a pratt!”
ja fail made a good post, so I pointed out that post.
Diego was actually SUPPORTING the regulars with his post deriding the inanity of people who say “first!” Then you guys jumped all over him like…
.
.
lol, well, YOU know
Thank you for the education, Dragonwriter.
Anytime.
*thwacks urwrong with the halibut again*
…Just to make sure to drive the point home.
Hey! I wasn’t the one who started it.
Save some of that halibut for Christopher. I was just copying his use of the word.
.
.
.
Notice I spelled the word correctly in my post below. Thanks to you!
oops, just reread his post. My mistake, lol. Would’ve sworn I’d seen it somewhere, though…
.
oh well. In the future, I’ll restrict my vocabulary to the words I can spell, like “jackass.”
Pot Kettle Black. Stupid pratts assume that ALL Americans only speak one language. I happen to speak 3 fluently and read/write 2 additional languages. My son has mastered 6 languages and is 21 years old. Your ignorance is as glaring as your bias. And national pride madates that I state there is no such thing as an Average American.
No such thing as an average American?!
Crap! I guess the census bureau, armies of statisticians, &… oh the last fifty years of psychology can kiss your polyglot backside, huh? /sarc
.
If national pride mandates you do anything, could you please try to make sure it doesn’t require you to flat out lie?
Where is the lie?
The cake is a lie.
.
Any time there is a group of any size, there is BY DEFINITION an avergae of that group. There is no way that you can deny that there IS such a thing as an average American. A whole BUNCH of science is based on this immutable mathematical fact.
.
You know what else would be GREAT to see? It would be wonderful to see people learn the REAL definition of national pride.
If you were really proud of your country, you wouldn’t need a “mandate” to lie about it, especially with such a blaring & obvious lie.
I do believe that the mandate to which she was referring was a personal sense of national pride. And she is pointing out that using “average american” as an insult is incorrect. Sure, there is a group of people that make up the average, but by what standards? Are we talking demographics? Age? Gender? Education? Occupation? Geographic location? Be specific.
If that is what she intended to say, then she should have said that. Since she didn’t say that I am forced to go by the definitions of the words she chose to use.
.
Thinking through it logically, she must not be very proud of her country if she feels a “mandate” to manipulate the truth into a lie, & don’t get me started on the hypocrisy of her statement.
Of course, based on what I have read, I am making an assumption that she is educated & understands what the words, “pride,” “mandate,” & “average” mean.
I could be wrong. I have been incorrect in my assumptions before.
.
Look, you don’t like what I post here. That’s fine.
But, address those points. Don’t try to dress it up in an argument, especially when all I need to do to win the point is open a dictionary.
I don’t believe in average anything. I am not average. I am different from everyone else and I do not adhere to the belief that ANY nationality has an average, including Americans. I believe each of us is unique and with that in mind, I dont believe in generalizing as a group or an average. I take umbrage with anyone who asserts that all people of one nationality is alike. I do not assume that all Brasileiros are like Diego and I do not assume all pratts are like you. But I do assert you are a pratt by lumping all Americans into an average.
You asked for it…
.
from dictionary.c o m
“1. a quantity, rating, or the like that represents or approximates an arithmetic mean: Her golf average is in the 90s. My average in science has gone from B to C this semester.
2. a typical amount, rate, degree, etc.; norm.”
.
I win, lol
.
.
btw, it’s “prat.” Dragonwriter told me
Ryannon, sorry for speaking for you when clearly you are more than capable of doing so for yourself. I couldn’t help myself. Pratt has so aptly named him/herself that it was just too tempting not to. You explained far better than I could have. It’s a matter of semantics with him I guess. Or would that be syntax?
Arg! Disregard the prat comment! I get so caught up in it all! Though urwrong is one.
Given up on the thin argument pretense? That’s ok. You weren’t so good at it, anyway.
If you’re going to change your tactics to insults, that’s cool. I can do insults, too. AND I’m pretty good at them. Check this out:
.
Looks like I was wrong to assume that Ryannon was educated enough to understand the meaning of “average” after all…
or “typical”
or “normal”
or “pride”
or “mandate”
or any of the other things she said, despite being as polyglot as she is
.
Damn! “Strike two” for me, I guess, lol
I have just about given up attempting to get through to you. You are an ill-mannered lout. Attempting a discussion with you is about as effective as yelling at a brick wall. The things you say she is too uneducated enough to understand are clearly beyond your grasp of comprehension. Most dictionaries have multiple definitions for many words. And while some of those words my not be interchangeable there is a certain leeway to many of them. I’m sure this concept is alien to you, you being so literal and all. Suffice it to say a discussion over the many possible definitions of various words is tiresome. Much like yourself.
Looks like I was wrong about you, too.
Shame, that. You’re just like Everyone Else.
*bumps ^ comment up over Avis’*
Wait a second! If Ryannon & Avis are being angry over words they don’t understand AND they are from the United States….
.
.
.
OMG! They actually are STUPID AMERICANS!
.
Woot! We have come full circle! Witness the POWER of LOGIC!
The more we talk to more apparent it is that Diego was correct in EVERY thing he said
We understand the words, and the many, many ways they can be used. It is you who doesn’t seem to grasp that.
And you might be on to something there Dragon.
“I know you are but what am I?”
You’re kidding me. THAT’s your counter argument? C’mon! At least make it interesting!
.
Closing arguments:
ja fail came on & made a good post. I applauded him.
Dragonwriter came on & corrected my mistake. I thanked her.
A couple of stupid, hateful jackasses came on & made stupid, hateful comments. I stood up & said, “Hey! Stop being stupid, hateful jackasses!”
.
If your feelings got hurt, then GOOD! Stupid, hateful jackasses DESERVE to have their feelings hurt.
If anyone deserves an apology here, it’s Diego. He came on & made fun of people who cry “FIRST!” just like you regulars do.
But, you jumped all over him, because his English is better than your Portuguese will ever be, all in the name of “National Pride.”
.
You know what? The only thing you can do to insult me is to keep talking, because, frankly, you stupid, hateful jackasses make it an embarrassment to be American.
.
Diego, eu sou pesaroso. Você era direito. Alguns destes povos são idiota. Eu não sei, mas eu penso que a maioria de americanos são povos amigáveis. Eu não falo o português. Eu usei o Internet para traduzir. Eu sou pesaroso se eu fiz quaisquer erros.
I might suggest a re-read. And maybe some research to see if in fact the regulars do what you say we do. You’re just upset that you got called out. Get over it and move on, May I suggest Pundit Kitchen?
Btw, Dragonwriter, you just took a HUGE weight off my mind, if being like “Everyone Else” means I’m not like the “unique” stupid, hateful jackasses.
*zips in*
You might want to read Diego’s first post a little more carefully before you apologize to him on behalf of most “friendly” Americans. Just sayin’.
*zips back out*
Ah, but don’t you see?
Isn’t that a wonderful opportunity to prove him wrong & demonstrate that the average American isn’t a stupid, hateful jackass?
.
Instead, all the stupid, hateful jackasses just had to PROVE HIM RIGHGT!
That does happen, yes. But that doesn’t mean you need to become a stupid, hateful jackass yourself.
Two wrongs make a fail, after all.
I agree. You see, I worship the holy Golden Rule. *folds hands in prayer*
.
“If thou witnesseth a stupid, hateful jackass engaged in jackassery stupid & hateful, thou shalt call out the jackass such that the jackass may see the error of his stupid hateful ways.”
.
In other words, if Christopher hadn’t been busy being a prat, I wouldn’t've had to call him on it. If you look, I even suggested a way to help him address Diego in a more appropriate manner.
.
When Avis & Ryannon came on & started being stupid, hateful jackasses, I called them on that, too.
.
Now, if none of these stupid, hateful jackasses had gotten in the way, I would’ve had the chance to engage Diego & try to convince him of the errors of his ways.
.
As is, the transgressions of the stupid, hateful jackasses FAR outweigh what Diego said.
You know what would’ve been even BETTER?
If people had tried being nice to Diego, I wouldn’t've had to apologize to him.
.
There’s a REASON this stereotype of “ignorant Americans” exists.
Maybe if certain people tried being a little nicer, terrorists wouldn’t be blowing up hotels trying to kill yankees.
.
Let’s do it! Grassroots campaign! Let’s make today INTERNATIONAL HUG YOUR NEIGHBOR DAY!
As much as I appreciate your willingness to delegate yourself as the “voice of reason”, I don’t particularly wish you to speak for me. Apologize on your own behalf, if you wish, but speak not for me. Thanks just the same.
He/she isn’t worth the time or effort. I wash my hands of idiocy.
*blush*
Isn’t it everybody’s job to share the love? Golden Rule, baby! Two wrongs make a fail!
*hugs Dragonwriter* Feel the love!
I know I shouldn’t poke the trolls (I always end up paying in the end), but hey, it passes the time. Ry, I am sorry I spoke for you. That wasn’t my intention.
You can speak for me anytime Avis. Sadly, it won’t matter. Idiots like urwrong and Diego are never going to change. I just take pride in the fact that I would never judge an entire nation on the actions of idiots like them.
.
Regardless, I come on here to enjoy the fails, not argue with idiots like urwrong so now I will just ignore his idiocy.
lol, YOU attack ME first, but when I point out your jackassery I’m the one in the wrong?
.
You know what I say to that? HUG AMBUSH!
IT”S INTERNATIONAL HUG YOUR NEIGHBOR DAY!
I’ma squeeze the jackassness out of you! Give it! It won’t hurt! Just relax & let it go!
.
Seriously, though. Have you guys ever been out of the States? Maybe if we spread the hugs around people like Diego wouldn’t hate us so mch…
You dare include yourself amongst the ranks of us? Get over yourself! You have been annoying, insulting and have attempted to start infighting. Go away.
It is impossible to treat quietly and dispute orderly with a fool.
*sigh*
I know. But… I have to poke them! Also? He is not who he seems.
Nuts???
I have been out of the States. Several times. I’ve been polite, friendly and courteous to all I meet. There are jackasses in every country. Apparently, I should have been thoughtful enough to hug the one guy who comments on Failblog.
Man this “urwrong” guy is an idiot. Ok let’s take a look at what’s happened here. So Diego makes a comment where he attempts to insult people who make first comments by bringing up that they’re american and the average american only speaks on language. Christopher points out that he speaks arabic to show that he is bilingual, thus proving that being american does not mean you only speak one language, as his way of showing that you cannot judge somebody based on nationality. urwrong decides to counter this and in doing so points out that the average american only speaks one language… something that has already been countered. Ryannon points out that all people are unique and that it is therefore wrong to judge based on “averages” because so many people are completely different to the “average” of their nationality. urwrong, who is clearly incapable of understanding such a concept, manages to translate “you shouldn’t judge based on averages” into “there is no such thing as averages” and proceeds to give a definition of average, thinking that he has proved it’s existence and therefore shown that he is intellectually superior. In reality, he has only made an argument that proves absolutely nothing in relation to Ryannons comment and when this told to him, he continually talks about the regulars being “stupid jackasses”, an insult he recycles continually.
when this is*
*throws everyone an oar sized spoon* Keep stirring, stir the crap pot just a little more, the aroma hasn’t quite reached it’s peak of gag stage yet. keep on stirring, keep on stirring, keep on stirring. *singing to the tune of keep on swimming on findging Nemo*
Wow, does everyone here not understand the word “average”?
.
Here’s the wonderful thing about “average,” you can’t “prove” that an average is incorrect by bringing up ONE exception to the average. IN FACT, if you bring up enough exceptions, THEY BECOME THE NEW AVERAGE!
You cannot destroy the concept of “average.” It will always exist.
.
The CIA’s worldfactbook, the American Census bureau, & plain common sense tells us that the average American speaks just one language. Sure, that may not pertain to you, but your exception does not disprove the truth of reality. In fact, if you could provide enough bilingual Americans to create a new average, I would be more than happy to admit defeat.
.
Unfortunately for you, the only examples you guys are providing are examples of Americans being stupid & hateful. So far, all you’re doing is proving Diego right.
.
TODAY IS INTERNATIONAL HUG DAY! END THE HATE! SPREAD THE LOVE! *HUGS* FOR ALL!
To address Mitchillio,
Ryannon did NOT say “you shouldn’t judge based on averages.” If she had, I would have completely agreed with her. What she said was “there is no such thing as an Average American,” which is a complete & obvious falsehood.
I gave many examples of institutions & sciences based on the fact that there clearly is such a thing as an average American, such that I did not feel the need to address the point any further. I skipped over any posts that weren’t on topic.
*HUGS*
I”m going to regret this, but…
I think what Ryannon was indicating, and urwrong is deliberately mischaracterizing, is that there are so many statistical categories that there is more than just one “average”, depending on the sample group, rendering the concept of average useless outside of labs, classrooms, and stastical compilations.
And Diego was not called out for objecting to “first” he was called out for saying “Yo, why r americans stupids” thus stating that 1. All Americans are stupid and 2. implying that only Americans say “First” which is patently false.
Since Diego was talking about all Americans, I was also talking about the all Americans category. Since Ryannon replied to my post, I assumed she was also talking about the all Americans category. That’s how the English language works.
If Ryannon had a different message to convey, then she should have phrased her post differently. As is, it’s a blatant lie apparently motivated by a horrible bias.
.
I don’t know Ryannon. I cannot read minds through miles of intertubes. If she has a message I have to rely upon the words she chooses to use.
.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Diego was being hateful when he said what he did, BUT he is just one Brazilian with one bad attitude. The OVERWHELMING response from some of the Americans on this board gives him more & more justification.
.
Like Dragonwriter pointed out, two wrongs make a fail. Christopher was fail with his stupid, hateful Arabic speaking comment. Ryannon was fail with her stupid, hateful average American comment. I called them on it & now I’m spreading HUGS.
*HUGS*
Um, did you read Christopher’s Arabic statement?
Which part of
“Roughly translated, since there is a language attrition between the two, “Even though you probably live closer to Arabic speaking countries, I doubt that you can read what I just typed.”
.
was “stupid, hateful Arabic speaking comment. ”
Once again you have only managed to reinforce your own
ignorance and lack of reading comprehension.
You can continue to try to justify your previous erroneous
statements, or you can step back and return to the start of the thread and read what was stated by: Diego, myself, Ryannon, Christopher, et al. Then re-evaluate your own comments and realize that your interpretation of events and the English language does not make it the right/ correct interpretation.
Actually, the average American speaks at least 2 languages, once you stop and consider how many Americans are first or second generation immigrants. It’s not always the same language, so the fact that the second language spoken by the rest of the world has become English (US) instead of French (FR) may be significant.. in some parallel universe.
The reason English (US) has become the Lingua Franca of the world has more to do with economics than politics, after all.
How many languages would you like me to respond to Diego in? I can handle several. And there are many Americans like me.. we just let others fail in the forlorn hope they’ll learn something. So, at that, we fail.
Well stated! Exactly what I hoped someone would say.
In all fairness, the closest Arabic speaking area from Portugal is Moroccoo, and the closest English speaking area from Portugal is the British oversees territory Gibraltar, which is closer than Morocco.
If he is indeed from Brazil, the closest areas become Mauretania and Guyana respectively. Guyana is a neighbouring area, and Mauretania is in western Africa.
Arabic is written from right to left and yet you formatted it from left to right. FAIL!
Huzzah for Christopher! Hey, though, I was just in Portugal in September and I gotta say, they do have really good olives.
Actually, my computer owes its existence to taiwan.
On the other hand, you write it backwards.
(Just kidding, man. You actually are, but I know you can’t help it with your settings, and I can’t read Arabic anyway.)
Except for when some dude with a Charlie Chaplain mustache comes through and captures your entire continent. Then you expect us to come save you.
You reeeeeally shouldn’t say that
you know who liked Charlie Chaplin mustaches?
HITLER!!!!
hey !
All mighty americans , can you please help us with the economic crisis too ?
we were too stupid and we made booboo
oh wait … nvm
go print more usd
It´s funny how Americans consider themselfs saviors of the helpless…
you tried to “free” for example vietnam from kommunism, and now you a
are trying to set democracy in Irak are you ?
America is not the very source of evil and stupidity, but they are far from
beeing all that´s green and good in this world.
For example, America uses 1/5 th. of the fuel used in the world and has not
signed up for the kyoto treaty.
/\
l
l
l Troll????????????
that was meant for diego
Well, I can’t exactly expect anything from anyone who lives in South America. Except for Venezuelans, because they produce oil.
That’s a double negative mate, you know what that means, right?
Oh really? Well, I don’t expect your comments to make any sense. Exhibit A: this post.
I am cunnilingual
Sshhh!
WTF! No jokes! WTH do you think this is?! a comedy website!??
why not.. every other citizen in the world is..
Maybe we don’t learn portuguese because Spanish is a more prevalent and useful language?
And calling us “stupids americans” hardly exhibits your intelligence, sparky.
ok dude, won´t argue with u about my language or anything else..
Just saying that it´s so stupid u guys saying “fisrt” “second” …
Wanna medal for being first to post?
They have those?!?!
yup
FIRST
SECOND
I can has medal now?
Primeiramente. Onde está minha medalha?
LOL, here is your medal!
About as stupid as assuming that the person who said it is an American. As it has already been proven that this is a multi-national forum. There are people from all over the world on here. Which you in all your brilliance fail to realize.
Out of curiosity, why does typing “First!” or “Second!” mean they *must* be American?
… And somehow you think that that’s limited strictly to Americans?
Idiot.
It’s funny how all the Americans get on your case.
The fact remains that you speak 2 languages and all they can do is.. well..
capitalize the A in America
I’m American myself. I speak 3 languages.
You guys are making Americans like me look stupid.
The fact remains that he has only established that he speaks Portuguese and English. I’m willing to bet that Portuguese is not a very common second language in the United States. Replying to Diego’s comments in English, the one language he has established that most of us here on failblog, an English-language site, speak, does not imply that we Americans do not speak a second language.
There have been much more intelligent responses to Diego’s comments than the argument surround the capitalization of “American.” Please give your countrymen more credit. Your divisive comments, implying that you are in the minority for having some intelligence, are making all of us look stupid.
Diego, baby! We all know it’s stupid to say “first”, etc. It’s a running joke around here.
That. Is. All.
Get over it/yourself and enjoy the happy banter. This is a fun place.
Velkome to ze Internetz!
To Diego, 12-10,10:17AM
the “First” thingy: It’s what’s called an “inside joke”. Participating in it on multiple levels
kinda sorta is an entry ticket into the subculture here. No doubt you have inside humor “memes” within your family & community! These jokes become “bonding marks”.
Hope this helps. But I’m always last up to the plate in these posts.
If Spanish is so useful, why do you get on Latin American immigrants’ cases for speaking it?
There used to be a lot of bilingual people in America. They got the s?!t beaten out of them.
Portugese-speaking person – not being good at English is not an excuse to be an idiot.
But person critting him/her for not speaking properyl:
EMBARRASSING FAIL.
That’s all.
what matters is that the guy that I´m talking to (not YOU in the case) understands me..
nation,
Join with me in condemning this ignorant half-wit of a portuguese willing to lambast an entire nation for engaging in the same activity he himself engages in. A portuguese who believes that only Americans who like the fail blog are virgins, and not Portuguese. A portuguese who believes that all americans are the same, and is unwilling to discriminate between red and blue states. A portuguese who has his head so far up his FAIL that he doesn’t realize that our country could kick his countries’ FAIL with twelve hicks and a world war two era tank. What a fool.
And don’t forget to buy my album on itunes, and humiliate Kanye.
Yey and forsooth!
Was he not engaging in losing his virginity or posting inconsequential statements?
Stupid I´m from Brazil, not Portugal.
Can you wax my bikini area? It’s starting to get overgrown.
Volunteers to help Ryannon out.
*hops into car*
*starts driving towards Arkansas*
*raises hand to help*
Well then, replace the word Portuguese to Brazilian. Same difference.
And just how would we have known that unless you told us? All we had to go on was you saying that you speak portuguese. We’re not stupid and when you don’t give us all the pertinent information, you make yourself look so.
Well then, just replace Portuguese with Brazilian. Same difference.
I apologize in advance to anyone who doesn’t speak Portuguese.
Mas e claro que você é Brasileiro. Parece que você acha que todos os Americanos são o mesmo. Mas eu falo Inglês, Português (melhor do que você fala Inglês com certeza), Espanhol e Japonês. Para com seus preconceitos. Acha que todos os Brazileiros são o mesmo? Acho que não. Seu vagabundo.
*translation”
Stop being so prejudiced you jerk
Brazilians are dirty, disgusting people.
Way to go, Sh!tbird. You are one of the stupid people we’re arguing about in the first place. Go swallow your own head.
Oh, Lunchbox…I just fell a little bit in love with you.
*HUG!*
I’m sorry, but I’m Brazillian too, and I’m totally against Diego, he is just a troll that escaped from the jail, don’t worry, we will get him, and you!
I forget, how many is a brazillian again?? Its a lot, right?
It’s an understandable mistake since all you said was you spoke Portuguese. That has no real indication where you are from aside from South America. That hardly makes him stupid when Portuguese is a native language spoken in Portugal. He made an obvious connection.
However, this doesn’t change the fact that EVERY FUCKING ONE OF YOU NEEDS TO STOP BAGGING ON EACH OTHER BECAUSE YOU ALL SOUND LIKE FUCKING IDIOTS.
Do you touch your mother with those potty fingers?
Diego, parece que você não conhece bem o FAILBLOG. Aqui tem muita gente legal comentando, gente dos quatro cantos do mundo. Americanos ou não, quem posta aqui freqüentemente detesta aqueles que gritam “FIRST” tanto como você. Mas aqui não se chama alguém de “estúpido”, usam-se comentários engraçados para zombá-lo.
E os americanos aqui sabem muito bem que tem muitos idiótas no seu país como tem em qualquer outro, também no Brasil. O truque é não generalizar!
Guys, keep up the good commenting – I love it! I often struggle to suppress laughter while at work, because my colleagues will certainly know that I’ve been reading failblog comments!
Oh, and you accidenty him very badly by calling him “portuguese”, that’s a major offense for a brazilian!
that’s what they all say…
Brazilian chicks are hot !!!!
The city-state of Brazil must be doing something right.
Could be the water, I must do a.. ahem (cough)
scientific study (cough) :p
so low on national pride you were afraid to mention that untill now?
Yay. You rock. BraBraBraBraBraBrazil!
good one Diego, you 0wn3d them
eu tbm sou brasileiro XD
Yes. It’s so logical to assume that you, having only said you speak Portuguese, are from Brazil. How dare we not know every random fact of trivia from around the world! Bom dia.
In america.
Yea, I am not gonna touch this one…
Let the other nations fight, we’ll stick to our peacekeeping roll.
*cowers* Can I come stay with you for a bit, McFail?
*shyly*
… umm, mind if i come join you guys? this place has gotten a little frightening….
Just a bit.
which is it… just a bit frightening… or you mind just a bit….
clarify please!
*closes eyes hoping it all goes away*
Frightening! It’s just a bit frightening! I don’t mind at all!
Why does the beginning of that sound like a song from “Rocky Horror Picture Show”?
haha! i totally forgot that movie exists.
*goes to see if said movie can be… acquired… on web*
*hugs turtle*
You can always join us. Even if you do…acquire…movies on the web.
*stern look*
Go Team America: World Police!!!
Go click on Engrish in the top right-hand corner.
If what Phlegethonic meant by “Why don’t you learn to use your language correctly” was “learn grammar and spelling”, I agree whole-heartedly. Having Portuguese as your first language does not excuse using American slang like “u” for “you” and dropping your apostrophes. We get on regulars for that, and we can certainly get on you for that, especially since you make no attempt to be friendly and instead generalize against an entire nation. And you can’t really say you use English ‘correctly’ if you write a sentence like “why americans r such stupids”.
He didn’t say he uses English correctly. He says he uses HIS language correctly. And, if you’re a native Romance language speaker and aren’t very polished with English, it IS correct to use plural adjectives with plural nouns. If you’re such a language expert, you ought to know that.
(I know you didn’t say you were. But I can put words in people’s mouths too, you know?)
HEY HEY HEY!!! Get off my American friends, and YOU get a life! Don’t get ugly!!!! BTW, I speak 5 languages!!! So kiss my American ASS!!!!!!
I get it, you’re angry. Go with what you feel.
9 languages! kiss my Dutch ASS!
Я американец и я говорю три языки.
For those of us who do speak more than one language, why would we learn Portuguese? I think you’d be surprised by how many Americans can communicate in more than one language. You’re right that if you spoke Portuguese with most Americans, they wouldn’t understand, but it’s not because they only speak English; they just don’t speak Portuguese. I’m just willing to bet that for most Americans, their choice for second or third language is going to be something more useful to them, such as French, Spanish, or Chinese.
Actually, it wouldn’t surprise me if most Americans weren’t at least partially bilingual. At least where I went to school, Spanish was a highschool requirement.
Where I live, everything is written in both English and Spanish. Some of the neighboring towns have even made Spanish one of their official languages. Spanish is taught in the elementary schools all six years, and in middle school and high school, each student must take at least three years of a foreign language in order to graduate.
Diego are you on TV everyday with your friend Dora ? Sounds like you have about the same age appropriate intelligence. If you don’t like Americans, don’t waste our time talking to us.
Another Patriot
That’s funny Diego. I’m so stupid that I speak English, Spanish, and non-weaboo Japanese. But no, I don’t speak your shitty Portuguese and I don’t want to, considering the fact you’re an idiot who loves generalizations.
Getalife? Is that a modifiead version of Second life?
It’s the new sequel to the Half-life series. I mean we already have half a life, shouldn’t be too hard to find another half of one somewhere here…
No, actually it’s this one building in Liberty City.
Do they actually have Secondlife? or is it just an Office thing?
Bigoted troll is bigoted
But he’s right. Give it up with the moronic ‘First’ crap.
Lurk more and you will see that the ‘regulars’ do not shout ‘first’ and agree that it is lame. It is Diego’s moronic assumption and is inability to type/speak coherently that people on here have a problem with.
ErickB is right. At failblog, you really don’t want to fall into the wrong crowd and shout ‘first’ ’second’ etc., or you will be branded either an idiot or a troll for the rest of your time in Failblog.
For these transgressions, you shall be forever labeled.
In Soviet Russia, labels transgress you forever.
Kinky.
Hideous.
Sarah Palin
Awesome
my new life goal is to fall into that wrong crowd
It will never happen. People just get excited that they lose all reason and can only think of one word when they see “No Comments” under the FAIL picture or movie.
“try to lose ur virginity”
Another FIRST!
I lost my virginity once. But she said no. She vetoed it. She was China in the United Nations Security Council of my virginity.
Stereotype fail.
All countries have idiots, just try to not be one of them…
/facepalm
.
.
All of you guys just proved Diego right
Diego, for your information, we are not the ones with horrible grammar.
I currently know Latin, French, and Spanish, and I am American.
That’s stupid for you.
You missed the point of Diego’s post, Ford.
Want to try again?
No, you missed the point of my post. Diego is wrong. Permanently.
By the way urwrong, you are almost as bad as Diego.
ALMOST????
Fine then, he IS just as bad!
You guys realize that now I get to make fun of anyone who take the piss out of the “FIRST!”-ers, right? Because you did it to Diego? Even though he didn’t do anything different than what you have already done time & time again?
.
From now on, I have license to piss all over anyone who hates on people who say “FIRST,” because of what you guys did on this thread today.
No, you don’t. But you go right on ahead and think that.
Only if they’re American, apparently.
*goes for a ride*
I wonder where this one will go?
If you’re going to post, could you at least TRY not to prove Diego right all the time, Avis?
.
PLEEZ?
That was stupid. And hateful.
And you’re a jackass.
You disappoint me.
Spend some more time on the blog, silently, and learn how we do things here. Before you make an even bigger ass of yourself.
I’ll speak real ssslllooowww.
wiredwrong, PLutz?
make war get more.
(Avis…I’m not ignoring you, I’m on the phone. Sorry!)
Oh, I didn’t think you would do that to me! This has been an interesting night, no?
HUG AMBUSH!
Feel the love, jackass!
*hugs Avis & runs away, laughing maniacally*
.
.
.
.
Quick! Where’s Ryannon BWAHAHAHaHA!
Who’s got the cootie vaccines? I need one, STAT!
TOO LATE!!
BWAKAHA!
*doin’ dah completely justified dance!*
The minds of the twisted speard things they thing are true. THIS MEANS YOU.
Urwrong, you are the wrong one.
In other words, demented people like yourself cannot me trusted to say anything accurate.
Whoops, *Epoch* spelling fail in both of those…probably cause I have been writing papers all day.
it’s ok
I GIVE YOU HUGS!!!!
Unless you are friendly, you will be hugging a straightjacket faster than you can say oh #$%&*@.
Ford, i’d keep that straightjacket handy if I were you.
Don’t worry, I will. Maybe I should stock several.
Nah, just one. They’re all just one person anyway.
All right then, I will have one straightjacket and will be heavily armed at all times.
Wow…! Those are some BIG biceps you have.
You weren’t kidding about being heavily armed…
**Flexes muscles**
Wow! Way to prove me wrong about you guys being stupid & hateful!
I GIVE YOU HUGS NAO!
*HUG*HUG*HUG*HUG*!
There’s a difference between stupid and cautious.
Fair enough.
Care to justify the unnecessarily hateful part?
.
Btw, want another hug? I have plenty to go around
*HUGS Ford*
I’d rather have a drink.
why dont you get a better economy ……wait…that came out wrong
sorry didn’t feel like reading all the comments but are you saying why are americans stupid because of the video or something else? If that’s the case then I thought you should know that it’s from Iceland
hohoho
Is this the Cult of the Dark Side?
i didn´t see any cookies so no you must be mistaken
tee hee hee
true, everybody knows the dark side has cookies…
Perhaps the cookies are inside.
Vader, bringin’ up the rear!
FIRST.
NO.
Actually, I think he was just telling us what his name is.
i think so too
you know i think he´s gay
because gay people believe in satan and are not inteligent
“gay people believe in satan and are not inteligent”
That describes a lot of “cultists” I know.
See, now that’s where you fail at life. I’m gay and i don’t believe in Satan. Into the troll cage with you!
I’m also a hell of a lot more intelligent than your sorry ass. Especially since I can spell the word intelligent correctly.
*snickers* I love it when trolls get caught in their own traps like that.
And it happens soooooooooo often!
Well, when you consider how stupid you have to be to become a troll in the first place, it really isn’t that surprising.
Actually, I think Poe’s law goes into effect here. Tastelessly, yes, but still Poe’s law.
Amen, Mr. Cuddles! Also gay and not believing in satan.
I’m pretty sure he was joking. Sarcasm doesn’t carry well on the internet, I’m aware, but I’m pretty sure that’s what he was going for.
I’m pretty sure he was being sarcastic.
I’m pretty sure he was being sarcastic.
You being sarcastic?
I FAIL at identifying sarcasm.
Those are his initials actually. Fredrick Ingleton Robert Stuart the Third.
That’s a really cool name.
Yeah, but he wasn’t the First.
PROGENITOR
MATT DAMON!
The dark side of the church?
I thought the church was the dark side.
Mr. Brightside of the church.
it’s not confidential. he really does have potential.
No, just the Church. But that’s really the same thing.
But this is an EPIC win!
And i also think that anybody trying to write funny comments on this blog always fail. you are not funny.
You’re right – you’re not funny.
Failbloggers are unanimous with Cloral’s statement.
Failbloggers are in unison with a choral statement.
Lol, I’ve been called ‘Coral’ before, but never ‘Choral’.
Well it was meant to be a variation of the above statement…but you’re welcome!
Oh, Cloral – I think somebody asked you this way back, but does your name come from the Pendragon books?
Damn, I’ve been on here too much. I actually recall that it was asked and the answer is … nope(if I recall correctly). But sorry Cloral, I can not remember where you said it was, maybe a family name?
Cloral actually comes from a story I’ve been working on for a long time. Wil probably never see the light of day though. So in essence, it is made up. I’ve been using it online for quite a while though on various sites.
*chains cloral to the desk*
*gets the laudlum*
What? It worked in the 1900’s!
I’d laugh, ErickB, but apparently none of us are funny, so…
AH darn! Well I guess this means we most go on a quest to find out what happen to the funny and just what is causing the nothing.
bedlam? or laudnam?
Corralled Failbloggers Union Issues Statement: WIN
So i’m pretty sure this is a Vader win
Seconded. I like the nonchalance.
that is an EPIC win!!! no fail there!!
That’s not a cult, it’s the Catholic church.
Yeah, I know. I didn’t like this one. Name it properly, Failblog! How about “loser Darth Vader fail”? The Chuch isn’t a cult.
A church actually IS a cult no matter what the religion. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. The video was HILARIOUS, nonetheless!
Cult is a word that has several different primary meanings.
Here are some:
1. Formal religious veneration
2. A system of religious beliefs and ritual; also: its body of adherents;
3. A religion regarded as unorthodox or spurious; also: its body of adherents;
4. A system for the cure of disease based on dogma set forth by its promulgator;
5. Great devotion to a person, idea, object, movement, or work (as a film or book).
We all know exactly how the word ‘cult’ is used on internet forums, and pulling out exacting definitions isn’t a valid explanation. I would bet money that whoever calls these people cultists either a) didn’t know that the procession was Catholic, or b) is anti-Catholic and stoops to underhanded terminology to subtly imply their stance on the Catholic Church. Most likely b.
Just wanted to add, those are Anglicans.
Second that. I’m Catholic and thought the video was funny. I didn’t think the “cult” title was funny. We can laugh at a good joke without needing to insult large groups of people.
There is humor in referring to one of the largest organized religions as a cult. It can be viewed as several ways and ‘insult’ is one of those ways. All religions start out as a ‘cult’. No religion has sprung forth whole and intact, but all have changed as they grow and expand and encounter new people and incorporate the belifs along the way.
My terminology: “The Catholic Church is a cult”. There ya go. Nothing subtle about that.
I agree with that. I wonder who you are though.
The only difference between a cult and a religion is the number of members. Itis somehow socially acceptable to believe in made up shit if everybody else does too, but if only a couple people believe in your made up shit, then you are suddenly a member of a cult.
Well, the priests were sure Catholic. But those wierdos with their clown collars…
Nah, these guys belong to some cult. Like the Columbus knights or something.
This is a procession from a cult that has perverted the Catholic beliefs.
Hence, Seeing Vader there really felt quite natural.
GO CULTIST VADOR!!
A or B it doesn’t matter. Regardless of how ‘cult’ is used on the internet, no matter how you look at it any religion is a cult. No one is calling the church anything its not, and anyone who disagrees either doesn’t realize there is more than one use for almost any word in the English language, or is ignorant to the fact that they are following a cult.
All in all its ment to be a joke, so don’t get so defensive.
and….where’s the difference?
Maybe if you look in the dictionary, you’ll find a technical definition of what a cult is. But the truth is when garden-variety English speakers converse in their day-to-day normal conversation, when someone uses the word ‘cult’, they’re not talking about the Catholic church.
Plus, notice how the parishioners are laughing at what’s happening instead of being fanatics and condemning Darth Vader for making a mockery of the great head honcho of the Hale-Bopp Aliens?
Actually, I don’t think that they are Roman Catholics. I think that they are Swedish Lutherans. The cut of the cassocks and the ruffs around the necks are more typical of Swedish Lutherans than Roman Catholics.
When was the last time you saw a serious Catholic? Half of them go to church because they need the sleep.
Besides, Catholics do kill people out of fanaticism. Mostly women, so I guess it doesn’t count.
The Catholic Church is nothing more than a Big Cult anyway.
Excellent Darth Vader Win!
He shows us how it is done!
Actually that’s a Lutheran church. Note the female priests. The video is from Reykjavik Iceland.
Bwahahahahahahahaha *gasps for breath* hahahahahaha*gasp*
*Picks self up off floor, wipes tears from eyes*
You must not be familiar with what a cult actually is. Or with the history of the Catholic Church and how many cults it has absorbed, stolen from, and spawned.
*still giggling*
Been reading Dan Brown again? Angels & Demons ?
Actually, no. I’ve never read any of his works. I have read some of the research his books are based on, but not his books. And yes I am familiar with the history of the Church. I’m also familiar with the histories of pagan cults in the area and how the Church frequently and deliberately arranged their holy days, rituals and rites, and other aspects to either cover up or reflect much of the pagan cultures. It is not secret that Hallowe’en began as All Hallows Eve, aka Samhain. Nor that Christmas falls near the Winter Solstice and the Yule celebration. Easter is near the Spring Equinox, and was a festival in honor of Ester/Astar, a fertility goddess. That’s where the Easter bunny and the Easter eggs come from – symbols of fertility to pagans.
That said, I am a Christian. I just find it silly when people get so up-in-arms about calling a religion, any religion, a cult. They all are, plain and simple. As it is, I really like some of what the pagan aspects stand for, and see little conflict with them as long as credit is given where it is due. But to insist that the Catholic Church is not a cult, or to trivialize how much it owes to and has taken from other cults, is just silly.
Are you aware of the history of the Catholic church? And, yes, the church has made mistakes in the past, I will grant you that. It is also 2000 years old. Kinda bound to happen. The modern day Catholic church, not quite as cultish as some of the protestant evangelical religion-type things I’ve seen.
There’s a difference?
No, actually it is not the Catholic church. That’s the Evangelical Lutheran Church of Iceland.
So you FAIL.
For the record, it isn’t a Catholic church. It is at State Church of Iceland, which is Lutheran. So get off your high horse and let’s hear from some irate Icelandians.
Okay, who’s been putting weed in the haybags again??? Those horses are out of control when they’re high!
*guilty look*
What…? The application said they wanted a joint!
How ’bout some irate Lutherans? We could go through that again…
fail dude, we’re icelanders not icelandians
um, yeah, not a cult. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
(yes, I was raised Catholic)
This is definitely not a Catholic procession, it’s a Lutheran one. This is with the Icelandic Evangelical Church, which traces its lineage straight to the original Lutheran Reformation.
Nah.. Actually, we’re supposedly protestant here in Iceland (for the last 500 years or so), so these priests were all protestant, except for Vader.
That’s not a Catholic Church, it’s an Evangelical Lutheran one.
That’s not the Catholic church, it’s an Evangelical Lutheran one
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA
this is a darth vader win FOR SURE
best one i’ve seen in a long time
Anyone ELSE want to say ‘darth vader win’?
Ah heck, why not…Darth Vader W- HEY LOOK A PENGUIN! NEAT!
Wow! A blue car!
I just coughed up my spleen from laughing.. Brb from hospital…… (afk)
Toe Mater sandwich
Come over to the Dark Side, we have cookies and funny collars!
–D Vader
I usually don’t have my sound turn on for these (since I’m at work), but today I just happend todid. I giggled hearing the Star Wars tune – it went so well with the video. But it wasn’t until the end that I noticed DARTH VADER! I about fell out of my chair! Kudos to you, failblog!
Wow – have you all ever experienced that deep, sinking feeling when, just as you’ve hit the “add comment” button, you notice glaringly obscene typos in your message? I’ve got a lot of nerve calling myself a professional secretary.
We wont judge what you do here…much…
Awfully considerate of you, dude. Thanks……much.
Yes, as long as you remember to remove your boss’ name from the email stating that you can’t give out his name!
And try not to sell the fire extinguisher again.
And by all means, end your screaming if daddy stops.
There’s so much to remember here! I should take notes…
Don’t worry Judy. I’ll let it slide this time, but next time, I’m bringing out the red pen!
Thanks, Mr. Cuddles!
Don’t let it slide, you might find a worm filled envelope in your mail if you do.
“I’m your secretary!!!” Buwahah!
**** JUDY: PROFESSIONAL SECRETARY ****
* TYPING * FILING * & * OTHERWISE COVERING YOUR ASS *
You again! Why do you persist in troubling us?
How’d the door on that cage get opened….?
Someone probably left out some nuts and acorns and attracted Everyone Else.
Probably. That would work.
Uh oh. I smell a squ… rodent.
You’re not the only one!
loool
in 0:15-0:17 one guy even slows down to see Darth