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Cheezburger Network Blog
the first
I love it when he actually hits the metal bar completely instead of the coconut, nice.
haha, and he does that a minimum of 4 times.
Who said he was actually trying to hit the coconuts? maybe he had to hit bitween them and hit the metal bar instead.. Yeah.. I bet you feel really smart naow!
Instead of coconuts he should have stuck to those chicken nuts from the nest.
I CANNOT believe this is real, this must have been a joke or something…
“hows the hand?” ”
“not so good i think..”
seriously, he barely hit one of them, had he even practiced?
No, it wasn’t a joke.
That clip aired in Denmark in a show called “Aftenshowet” (wich I would translate as “The evening show”) and he was supposed to hit the coconuts, but
as you see, it didn’t turn out very well.
He tried to break the world record. X3
it was real… he was attempting to beat the world record, but due to rainy weather, and bad planning, this happened
LOL
what a loser
he’s like an eighth degree black belt and he never even broke one of them O.o
I loled. I loled hard. And so did my mother.
It takes a good joke to lol my mother.
Cheers, and merry christmas.
interfail joke win!!
lol
reference comedy
If i was stuck on an island and had to choose three things i would choose
1:coconuts
2:metal bar
3:kung-foo guy
the coconuts are for eating, the metal bar is for placing the coconuts. But the kungfoo guy is just there to fetch me more coconuts. I can open them
without mastery of the hidden metal hitter kungfoo, BOOF!
Indeed!
It was definitely to show how tough he is.
Douche ninja
or how dumb
fail
translation fail…
u idiot
Well, gee! Maybe coz I speak Danish??
So who’s dumber?
Im from Denmark, where this program is from, and he IS trying to hit the coconuts. this clip is WAY more fun if you understand dansih.. lol
Well, I’m Danish and I knew this clip from the radio. The stupid guy aims at
breaking the world record of bashing coconuts with your hands (which means
that at least one guy has done this before). Unfortunately, he sucks so bad that
he hits, like, half a coconut before the host (the lady) asks him to quit.
No… he was trying to kill a mosquito that was around the coconuts… now he will have to put frozen water ( that works just like ice ) on his hand
No… he was trying to kill a mosquito that was around the coconuts… now he will have to put frozen water ( that works just like ice ) in his poor hand… haha
Pretty stupid design for holding the coconuts, really, with the upright edges. Reminds me of catching my finger between a free weight and the rack – major ouch!
I love it when people actually talk about the video/pic instead of masturbation and whoever said “first”! I wish we always had actual discussion like this.
…And if he hadn’t, maybe he would have cracked one of them. The first hit probably hurt so much that hitting the coconuts was unbearable. Hit heart totally wasn’t in it after that.
hahaha! this was the dumbest ideer ever. he like hits the coconut one time out of five blows. genius setup!
Come back when you have something to contribute.
Cause your comment sure contributes a ton. Really opened my eyes and got me thinking.
So did yours.
… and yours.
Uh-oh… I think we’ve hit an infinite loop.
… and yours
…and yours.
…and mine.
I like the Tinman.
there is no santa
think about that
and mine!!!! …and yours…
So did yours.
so is your face
And … oh well, nevermind.
So did *AAAAAHHHH*
so did….yy???D’OOOOOHHHHHHH!!!
monkey see, monkey do.
Infinity WIN
I thought it was nice.
oh me too
i have never laughed so hard at a chain of comments before than i have now
cow
I have to say, most comments don’t contribute anything.
I wish that the lady was karate chopped.
Did you say you wish the lady gave him a carat chop? eeeeek!
carrot fail
What’s up, doc?
I think he took a wrong turn back in Albuquerque!
HASSSAAAAANN CHOP!
carrot shop?
Carrot? Do you mean Karate?
Why must everyone insist on doing that? Seriously. If you’re going to say first. Atleast typing something constructive then write a post script of “woooo! first”
“Everyone” does not insist on doing it. Just a few, but highly visible, limp dildos.
*snork*
Wow, I now have a new definition of “useless”.
In case you wanted to practice frustrating masturbation there, Avis.
Alex, I’ll take useless items for one thousand dollars.
This tool is used to make a limp dildo.
What is a blowtorch?
Correct!
I think that you coined one there.
Ah That looked painful. I Like to show off. Just not hurting myself doing it. >.< I lol’d, Metal Beam smash in 3…2…1… Ouch ouch ouch ouch! What.. Not once. But four times? lol
this video is great, it should get a better rating
He actually the the weather (it was raining)
“Use an action verb”
i was this when it was aired live on danish tv. The man trying to break the coconuts is actually a martial arts expert o.O
Duplicate comment detected; it looks as though you’ve already said that!
Duplicate fail
If it’s a duplicate comment, wouldn’t that be duplicate win? Or perhaps redundancy win? a fail generally implies you didn’t manage to do something.
first
Old video but fun
Suprised no one has said this but..
You failed.
After this astonishing relevation, we debate whether the pope really is catholic.
he’s clearly jewish.
Breaking News! From this, we learn that bears DO NOT do poosicles in the wood, I repeard DO NOT do poopsicles in the wood.
well, which one is it? poosicles or poopsicles?
Neither…or BOTH!
*cackles*
Snap, cackle, pop?
Vice Crispies!
No, no… sap, cackle, poop.
I would really go get you ass looked at if it’s sappy and cackling.
and that is why i stopped eating hot pockets…
Yeah. By an exorcist.
but if it’s DRUG krispies then it’s crack snuffle and pot.
Ye really are a bunch of lifeless twats! Can’t believe I wasted 2 mins of my time reading yer patethic comments
no no no. it’s snap crackle mitch and pop!
Bff…you repeard?? Surely that’s not something you should admit in public…!
epic win comment
What? He told me he was a Buddhist! What a liar!
no way… he is a just a robot! is Reitzinger Z!!
Well I reckon that makes him a democrat, then.
i was under the impression that he was a satanist….or was that “santa-ist”? i can never remember which one believes in santa as our savior……
Wrong on both counts. He’s a satinist. Just look at those robes!
I’m a velvetyterian myself, but most of my friends think I’m woolish.
I’m a pastatarian. I have beautiful meatballs.
Maybe he was just dyslexic.
The one that has noodly appendages.
it’s the devil-worshipping dyslexics. they sell their souls to santa.
*Roffle*
Funny he doesn’t look druish
Now we’re making relevations on top of revelations? Hot damn, I better hop to it!
I sure do seem to be missing a lot of memos lately…
because saying that same phrase for every single picture or video is fail in itself
and annoying
Maybe he should start off with a potato… and work his way up.
and instead of hitting with his hand he can…
oh, wait… can they put that on video?
yep, but not on failblog
hit it with his…head?
Yeah, his smaller head.
Ohhh, like Murderface and his bass guitar.
Season 1 Episode 3!
Dethklok Rules!
Yeah, I’m over it now.
Yay for Metalocalypse reference!!
Metalocalypse for the WIN!
Maybe that’s why lurker’s ass was sappy and cackling
Potatos being worked upwards seldom lead to good things.
Awwww you sick bastard.
Sometimes they lead to a new set of curtains, isn’t that good?
Oh wait, that’s “from.”
That will starch your shorts.
Keeps it stiff in his pants.
And be very protuberous.
I believe the Vicar would be upset.
I think he should start out with grapes… coconuts should be left to the professionals.
And the sparrows.
Or African Swallows
They grasp them by the husk.
It’s not a matter of where they grip it. It’s a problem of weight ratios. A 1 once bird cannot carry a 1 pound cocconut.
Damn…. quote fail. 5 ounce bird.
Ro-cocconut? What, is that a frilly French style of palm fruits?
It’s an offshoot of baroque-onut.
But of course african swallows are non-migratory!
It’s not a question of where he grips it… It’s a simple question of weight ratios.
Are you saying I’m fat? It’s the pants, I swear.
it’s not a question of where he grips it.
Or maybe two.
Uhh… When I wrote Swallows, I meant “African Swallows”… yeah… uhh… I think I need caffeine.
Psssssst. You wrote sparrows.
This’ll wake you up though.
*SQUEEZE*
Except that you wrote sparrows, not swallows.
*Hands fluffy a cup of coffee*
You wrote “sparrows”. You should stop the caffeine…. and the other legal drugs.
when you wrote sparrows? definately caffine… XD
What did you mean when you wrote sparrows, then?
But you originally said Sparrows?
You wrote “sparrows,” not “swallows.”
Correction Fail!
I didn’t get it when the first six people wrote that. I’m so glad you added it for the SEVENTH time.
And when you say you wrote swallows, you meant to say you wrote sparrows?
Or perhaps the carribean woodpecker
Judging by the number of gold stripes on his belt (5!) he’s been at it for 15 years as a black belt… That’s probably close to half his life of failure.
Or maybe a tomato
No, I think a potato might be a bit too much. Maybe eggs.
Coconuts WIN
Is it me or does he seem a little Coconut shy?………..
Ba-zing
I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts.
are they standing in a row?
yes they are
Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head!
deedledee
Give ‘em a twist, a flick o’ the wrist…
thats what the showman said.
That’s what she said.
there stands me wife, the idol of me life, singing roly poly ball a penny a pitch
There they are a standing in a row.
My nuts wouldn’t stand for that.
Hm, someone likes to talk about his nuts… *takes notes*
*recapitulates*
So Mookie, now you have incriminating notes about Blue2th and ErikB. Who’s next?
* retreats carefully *
*Looks around nervously*
No need to worry. We’ll still love you even if you are into bondage and keep your nuts in a row!
Just don’t keep them in a jar. You will never live it down.
Even? There are certain people around here that look upon such things as a requirement. Naming no names of course.
Ok, ok…replace ‘even’ with ‘especially’.
Happy now?
*grin*
And I like feet. So what?
my poor uncle
Aww poor guy. Why did he keep going?
‘cos he’s just a li’l trooper!
Because it was on live tv hahhaha he would’t get emberessed if he got 1!?
up your butt with a coconut!
up your nose with a ruber hose
Ruber…? What is that, some sort of Knight of the round table who likes to paint portly nekkid ladies, only in cartoon form?
actually, you’d have to talk to the vicar about that one.
no u
my poor uncle :/
O_O Are you schizophrenic?
Why yes!
I think repetetive would be a better adjective.
I think repetetive would be a better adjective.
BondFan4518,
It is spelled: repetitive
Thanks.
Thanks.
I think redundant would be more fitting, although redundant is more fitting.
brought to you by the department of redundancy department
repetitious fail.
At least it was repetitively repetetive
Well, that too, but I have reason to believe this commenter is the same as “Up Butt Coconut” up there…
it looks like he breaks his wrist
Nope. Absolutely a sprained ankle
Maybe he should start with a douche and stick with that.
” and everybody wasn’t kung-fu fighting”
Coconuts arent as fast as lightning!
And they aren’t frightening at all..
Well, they DID beat the crap out of that guy’s hand!
It all comes down to who has the best defensive skills.
Yeah, and expert timing.
actually, i think the metal bar did most of the work there….so the coconuts are still not scary at all…
But they didn’t fight with expert timing
dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun
But they fought with expert timing!
I beg to differ. According to ABC TV the claim is that 150 people are killed each year due to falling coconuts…interesting!
But can they be carried by swallows?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWSA6vqKPw8
this is how you do it.
That was very funny
First class fail, and (thankfully) recorded for everyone to enjoy LOL
ROFL! Now thats a real FAIL! Hahahah!
There’s a MUCH better one in Dutch!
With melons
OK here it is:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4XidLx1rXs
The fun starts at 1:50 or something. ENJOY!
It’s not quite as FAIL, but certainly more painful!
OMG that was so so painful to watch.
Painful on so many levels…
Wow… I’m surprised he has any brain cells left… :-/
Doctor should have stopped the fight after one melon.
who says he has brain cells left? He didn’t quit on the 1st one, and he’s up there to begin with!
I doubt anyone can break a coconut with his/her bare hands.
It is possible. Sometimes they do demos in Hawaii where they even rip the outer skin with the bare hands first. This guy looks like he was watching too much Texas Ranger and not practicing enough.
Chuck Norris could do it with just a glare
Chuck Norris could do it with his penis.
Chuck Norris doesn’t need to glare. They break open for him.
Um, I thought that’s how we all do it
*thinks back to last party where I woke up with that baaad feeling*
I can crush a bounty bar….does that count?
Are you *really* sure you can? You could end up like this guy, breaking your wrist trying to crush a chunk of delicious milk chocolate with melting coconut paste. The taste of paradise… Mmmmmm…
at least you HOPE it’s coconut paste
supposedly, you can’t crush and egg with one hand by making a fist around it…never tried it. has anyone here?
Nice try!!!!! Im not falling for that one!!
……. again…
no, it’s true. But did you know if you put salt on butter it gets really warm as long as I have my hand over yours…
It is true but you have to hold the egg lengthwise.
Did you know that you can make Mountain Dew glow by adding a teaspoon of peroxide to it?
That sounds like a recipe for disaster.
that sounds like a good evening.
Mountain Dew pretty much glows on its own…*gag*
Snopes covered the “mountain dew + peroxide = fake radioactive goo” And, yes, I can crush AND egg with one hand. What you do is put a opened egg in a pan, place it on a burner and start it up. Then you go back to the counter, take that egg shell, and crush it with one hand!
An opened egg huh?
No, no…”A” opened egg.
‘Cos loosing in not a option, you know.
Sorry, sorry. I keep forgetting.
*IS!!
Sheesh.
*ker-SPLORTCH!*
*facepalm*
I didn’t even see that!!
Bukkit please?
Coconutfacepalm?
False.
old
cold
scold
fold
folk
yolk
yoink
Yuck
F*ck?
Thanks, but I’ll pass.
*sign sign pass*
thanks dragon,
*sign sign pass*
zoinks
oink
Albuquerque
boink
doink
STOP IT THESE ARE THE MOST ANNOYING CHAINS EVER TO SCROLL OVER AND COMPLETELY IGNORE WE NEED A HIDE COMMENTS BUTTON WHERE CHAINS LIKE THESE CAN BE ..HIDDEN
Bitter much? Get over it, get on with the rest of your life, and leave us alone!
*sticks a “hide button” in Riley’s forehead*
Piley
Miley
Smiley (not)
bile(y)…?
Wiley
(he’s not)
Highly
Slyly.
shyly
ops
*inserts missing colon to get desired effect*
…missing colon.
*very deliberately does NOT make a ‘full of shit’ joke*
Goes well with the prune joke I made a few fails ago.
Yeah, your mamma is old…
I think he only hit a coconut once, maybe twice…. lolz!
Ouchie!
You misspelled ‘quiche.’
You misspelled ‘quickie’.
*quickens*
*pregnant pause*
*lingers under misconception*
*likes it when you linger*
This certainly is fertile ground.
We enjoy our puns, yet other may think we belabor the point.
True. Still, it’s a nice gestate on their part to let us play together.
The key to a good pun is the delivery.
When it comes to puns, some commenters are head and shoulders above the rest.
We tri to mester up some good ones!
(Btw…your last bit of Latin was a stroke of genius.)
Ooh. I like the sound of that.
*strokes genius*
I’m not sure I can wean myself off of this pun-run.
(You were quite handy with the vocabulary yourself!)
*brushes with greatness*
Well, it’s slowed to a crawl, so I don’t think you’ll have to.
(Hee!)
*touches of class*
Did you forget the picnic supplies??
Whaddayamean, he’s got a black keikogi – which he probably calls a kimono – and is ipso facto awesome. Or awful. Fulsome? Some fool? Anyway, don’t mess with a black keikogi, unless you have some serious coconuts!
Hi pot.
Uhh… thats the outfit not the belt?
Wow, you’re special
…and your comment was discriminatory
chill, nobody really cares that its called a “dan”
that was an incredible FAIL.. he should work on that then try again…
-afterthought- he’ll probably fail again tho…
Actually, “keikogi” — aka “dougi” or “gi,” as used (incorrectly) in English — refers to the entire marital arts practice outfit, comprising of an “uwagi” (shirt/jacket), “zubon” (pants), and “obi” (belt). “Dan” refers to one’s *rank* in a martial art. Not to any piece of clothing. The black belt and outfit are merely a symbol of one’s rank and not a “dan” itself.
In other words, STFU n00b. “Racist” indeed. He was making fun of martial arts wannabes like yourself that prance about trying to show off how cool they are. People who might confuse a keikogi with a kimono… or a dan, in your case.
Though, as to the original poster, I’d like to point out that several martial arts *do* use a black gi traditionally, and it’s not necessarily a show off thing in and of itself. Hapkido, kempo, and jiujitsu practitioners occasionally wear all black gi.
He should put some lime in the coconut then he may feel better.
i doubt it… fails cannot be changed over time
he should forget about getting that black belt too
PPPPLLLBT! Stop ruining all my fun you, you, you FUN RUINER!
*gets into the “crane” stance.
*
Woo-oo, ain’t there nothin’ you can take, I said
Woo-oo, to relieve your bellyache
It’s called a “fun sucker”
and lets not get the first letters mixed……
No? Whyever no-
*BURNT!*
that’s not called a belt but a DAN! you ignorant cultureless hag!
Anger management fail? Lashing out at 2 commenters…
For those of us that don’t spend hours, days and months wearing Japanese bathrobes and thinking of how pale and tough we are: WE DON’T CARE WHAT IT’S CALLED
He’s in colada pain, ya?
Facepalm (tree)
Faceapple (tree)
*rum-inates*
Pineapple (bush)
*mastur(beech)*
He should have studied Mai Tai
Or call the doctor and woke him up.
No no no
You put the BEER in the coconut then drink the lot down
Wow! he’s a 5th degree black belt in… coconut percussion? … vegetarianism?
Can any german speaker ( or whatever language it is ) tell what excuse does the guy give? maybe the coconuts did not respect the rules of the combat or something.
His excuse was probably “I am very sorry, but when I missed the coconuts and hit that metal I-beam over and over, I broke my second through fourth metacarpals into about fifty pieces, and I really should take a break now.”
I like you much better than the “I was really first!!1!!one!!” Tom.
Yes Tom, you may now take the place of Tom The PETA Advocate and
make us laugh instead of chafe.
Remember never to say firs*, though.
It’s not German, but maybe Swedish?
Anyway, what a wuss, I mean – I would perform as ludicrous as this guy does, but at least I don’t pretend.
I’d like to grap this guy’s girlfriend’s hooters when I see them one night out and then see how this wiener would try to pay me back.
Danish! YESS!!! Total Fail on RĂ¥dhusplads (main square, capital city; that would be Copenhagen for the Americans
).
I’m so proud of my country!!!
Translation please.
And now in my best Danny Kaye voice:
♫Wonderful, wonderful Copenhagen
Friendly old girl of a town
‘Neath her tavern light
On this merry night
Let us clink and drink one down
To wonderful, wonderful Copenhagen
Salty old queen of the sea ♫
Forget the translation. I found them below. I’m clever that way.
YEAH! Copenhagen ftw! I was so excited when I saw that, too!
I’m pretty sure it’s actually Danish. Definitely not German or Swedish.
he didnt bow to them first, thats what went wrong.
indeed, must show proper respect. I remember having to bow to a freaking 1′by2′ before breaking it.
It’s from a danish talkshow.
The female host, says something about – “it must be the rain”, and mister pain-a-colada swears a couple of times, then tells her he “struck the bar” and that his hand isn’t very well.
*Unreal-speaker voice yells* “Humiliation!”
LOOOOOL YEZZZZZ!!!
HUMILIATION!
LOOOL hahaha
It’s Danish, and the hostess blames it on the rainy weather. (I’m presuming she means that his hand slips or something?)
It’s Danish.
She asks if his hand is okay and he answers “it’s probably not very good”..
No wonder
It’s Danish. He’s trying to break as many as possible in some time frame. She stops him after 15 seconds. The gist of the conversation is that it’s been raining while they set up and his hand is slipping off the coconuts. They seem to have discussed the rain being a problem beforehand. The very first thing she says is, “But you’re still ready to try it?” When she stops him she says, “Let’s stop there…that rain, it’s not really helping.” The last thing she says is, “Let’s wait with the attempt until another time. Otherwise you’ll totally destroy your hand.” (Too late)
Translation to his excuse:
The woman first says: Thomas! Don’t you think we should stop it now? The time was 15 seconds but with all that rain…
The guys says: I think it helped.
Woman: Does your hand okay?
Guy: It hurts
Woman: You know what? Maybe you should try that experiement another day, or else you’re gonna completely break your hand.
(The language spoken was Danish)
Yup, it’s Danish.
The guy isn’t the one stopping it but the journalist.
He then agrees to stop and admits that it hurts a bit… ^_^
It’s actually not danish but maori, you all got owned by these noobs!
It’s Danish, and he doesn’t actually give an excuse. The lady with the mic does however (“it’s probably the rain”), and says he better stop before he totally wrecks his hand. She then asks how his hand feels and he goes, “Yeah, it’s probably not so great… I hit the bar.”
It’s danish, it’s my motherlanguage, so I’m pretty damn sure I’d know
its danish and he said that the rain made the coconuts harder
5th degree DAN! not blackbelt! You noob!
Well I may be a noob at many things. Not martial arts though, as I practice taekwondo and I’m aware of what dan is.
Judging by this sucker’s uniform, I can’t recognize what martial art is that, so I can’t tell if it uses Dan grades or something else.
If you know what martial art is this, please enlighten us all.
I’m a noob in many aspects of life, not martial arts though. I practice Taekwondo and I’m aware of what Dan is.
Since I can’t identify the martial art of this guy by his uniform, I wouldn’t know if they use Dan or another form of degrees.
If you know what martial art is this, please enlighten me.
Ok ok we get that it’s a Dan. Crack the anger management textbook. And understand to those who aren’t as deeply into martial arts it looks and quacks like a belt.
Also? To those that aren’t as deeply into martial arts? Don’t care one way or the other.
This was not aimed at Thepook, but rather to the roided up freak.
Only because I saw it again – NO ONE CARES?!
19
I can crush a bounty bar….does that count??
LOL, DEFINITELY!
Good one!
ques’t que cest un “bounty bar”?
lol
A bounty bar surprisingly is a bounty bar!!
shut up, a bounty of what? is it a candy of some sort?
It’s a chocolate bar that, appropriately enough, contains coconut.
It is the most yummy chocolate bar of them all! I could sure go for one right now!
Similar to a Mounds in the US?
Sometimes you feel like a nest…
ohhhhhh I forgot that it wasnt available in the US! Yeah, I think so. Just a chocolate coating over a coconut and wafer inside, or something like that.
You can get Bounty bars in the U.S. I’ve seen them in a few places.
Wow! Bush isnt even gone yet and freedom is already returning!
He was beating hairy nuts in public—WIN!!! But everyone is breaking his balls—FAIL!!!
A Bounty is the British/Irish version of a(n American) Mounds bar… creamy coconut covered in chocolate. Not as sweet as the Mounds, and IMHO better than.
#You know I’m waiting,
Just anticipating#
Masturbating?
Well, perhaps later.
(The tune was Try a Little Tenderness – used in Bounty adverts.)
Try a little tenderness.
And that’s what you get for not using ’show all comments’.
I hope you’ve all learned something from this.
I have.
*SQUEEZE!*
That guy couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn, let alone a coconut. He looked like a five year old having a temper tantrum.
Which part is the broad side?
‘oh! It’s the one with all the broads leaning on it, silly.
NUT FAIL….again
bust a nut?
Crusty butt?
Ew.
Best of all is that is was live television to the whole nation.
I’m wondering if that
hand breakercoconut holder was specifically designed for this demonstration of inability.I do not think so. They would had sharpen the edges to increase the drama value.
Oh, you mean like put little razors on it so when he missed it would slice off his fingers….THAT would be cool.
Maybe he should do that with muffins… It’s waaaayyy easier.
Only if the muffins are neutered.
Or macaroons?
The Coconuts was DODGING!I saw them!
actually i wont like to be the guy that will hold them instead of metal bar.
poor guy anyway
In a win of a different sort, they’ve finally captured proof on film of a man who never has played with his nuts before.
What would he do for a Klondike bar?
Mookie, does he have a case against the coconuts? Battery, maybe? You could really milk this one!
I would say he’s standing up against violence to women
Wow. That went … quite badly.
Use your head dumbass, use your head!!!
Proof that any a-hole can buy a black bathrobe…
or proof that the news brodcast is desperate to get anything.
or proof that Elvis is alive.
and you still haven’t gotten one?
He’s a British snack?
Or a bundle of sticks.
A cigarette, perhaps?
Black belt my ass… he has to actually HIT the coconuts!
it’s not a black belt but a DAN! You Milf!
Let me get this straight.
You just called a guy called ‘Frank’ a Milf? That’s not logically possible. Unless the universe imploded, of course.
M = Man *nod* Tom’s got an obsession with gay stuff.
Ah.
*shakes head and walks away*
You stole my response…give it back!! Doitnowmove.
P.S Like the new pics Ry.
P.S. Like the new nuts B2F.
O.o
I’m sure you have nice nuts too BFF but I would never type it out loud.
Why thank you, I had them custom made and imported from Bali.
I knew they tasted of tamarind! wait… did I type that out loud?
ROFL.
I think he means (no offense, Frank): Moron I’d Like to Forget. (Check out Pundit Kitchen.)
XD I LOL’d for a solid minute.
Well, excuse me for not knowing the ranking structure of martial arts…
Ignore him. Dan means step or grade. Basic ranks are called kyu. Most people refer to the color of the belt and it is acceptable. He’s just being a douchebag with too much vinegar and not enough water.
I thought he was full of piss and vinegar.
BTW, Ryannon, it’s after the 6th! How is he?
He is awesome, if he is who I think he is. How is mom?
WOO!!!
Did you give him the books yet?
*waits for answer about Avis’ mom*
Mom is good, completely back to normal. Back to driving me nuts, as per
usual.
Glad to hear/read your news!
Yep, gave him the books and went shopping for more along with clothes. All he came with regarding clothes was his uniform. “Wanted to travel light” Mom’s card to the rescue.
Glad to see mom is doing well
What news?
“O honey nurse, what news?
Hast thou met with him? Send thy man away.”
(Sorry. I just can’t help myself.)
(Oh…pfft! *smacks self* I do believe Ry’s news is that her son is home from Iraq for the holidays…right, Ryannon?)
I have it on good authority.
Well that is great news!
Well, excuse me for NOT KNOWING THE RANKING STRUCTURE OF MARTIAL ARTS.
Well, excuse me for NOT KNOWING THE STRUCTURE OF THE MARTIAL ARTS RANKING SYSTEM.
Plus, why are so touchy about it? Whenever someone gets it wrong, you seem annoyed. Why is that?
Well EXCUSE ME for not knowing the ranking system of the martial arts!!
Sorry I just wanted to say it too
m-mm-m-m-mmmmmmmultiFAILLLLL(instead of multiform..lol)
man must be used to failing…he doesn’t seem at all fazed at his fails…
He’s concentrating on not screaming like a girl, too distracted by the pain to be embarrassed.
ROFL failed so god like xD
he will be a noob for his lifetime…
Or, perhaps not. I’d sure like to see what would happen with your head on that bar instead. I’m sure you won’t be so quick to judge his marital skills then, now would you?
I wasn’t judging his marital skills at all, myself. It was the breaking of the
coconuts that I saw failing.
And heres a translation of it all!! Its in Danish. sorry for mistakes.
host: “So you’re still up for it?
loser: “Yep! yeah…”
host: “Well i have an assistant with a watch, so if you are ready we are just gonna move back over here and ermm… are you ready thomas??
loser: “yeah!”
host: “and i say. 3. 2. 1. GO!”
…
host: “ermm uhh Thomas dont you think you should be careful before you destroy (yes destroy!) you hands
loser: …shit
host: “I think we should just stop now, 15 seconds has passed.. in this rain. this isnt going to work..”
loser: I. I umm… I just took the bar. (the row in which the coconuts are)
host: “is uhh… is it bad with your hand?”
loser: “It’s probably not too good”
host: “Well uh, shouldnt we save this experiment for later? otherwise you will totally destroy your hand!!
God damnit… you have to KNOW if you have skill or not. Maybe next time he should smash some pastry? He IS Danish after all!
Ohyeah. I remember this at tv. xD
A typical dane.
haha, excellent! the sound of his hand hitting the bar is sick
Oh and for the record. A DAN is something you ADD to your black belt! There are up to a max of 10 DANs you can ADD to your black belt. Once you graduate from the black belt you get a DAN to ADD to your belt. so basically he has a BLACK BELT probably with some amount of DANs added to it. A DAN doesnt have to be more than a yellow line or a patch of some color you can sew into your belt.
I just got my Lt. Dan.
Forrest???!!!!
RUN!!
Damn you Avis!
Sorry.
Run Mookie, RUN!
WIN!
Right. So what’s this steely dan then?
Steely dan?
That is some kind of nickname. How did he get it?
Not to be picky but there are 10 dans total, and when you receive a black belt, you are a first dan (so you’re not adding it to the belt at that stage – it is your belt). Also, a 10th dan can only be awarded posthumously so you can’t technically add that to your black belt as you’re already dead. I don’t know if this is for all karate but it is the case for many of them.
Good thing I wasn’t being picky, eh? Should see me when I get picky!
In traditional Aikido, there are only two colored belts, white which is kyu and black which is dan. White belt ranks begin at six and continue to one, i.e. sixth kyu, fifth kyu, fourth kyu, etc. Black belt ranks begin at one and continue up to 8th dan, with a very few 9th dans. Unfortunately, in the West, they are adding colors just to appease people who look for rank significance.
So how many Karate hands did the metal Black Bar break?
I counted one.
Yep, one!
All of them.
It’s been filmed in DK xD Copenhagen.
They’re stupid enough to try while it’s raining AND on a metal-bar that doesn’t support the coconuts xD jesus.
I hate pure danes.
I’m only half
hahah
oh i hate those pure danes as well…mixed-breed danes are alright though
I think that Danes are great.
I prefer french bull dogs myself, but to each his own.
We hate you too, filthy half-blood. =P
And we hate you.
lol how can u say that??? im pure dane and im not stupid;D well maybe a little;D but if ur half dane i consider u as a betrayer of ur country-.-
Weeeeelll..
I say, if you’re danish, you’re breakfast!
Lige præcis – CPH.. kun sjællænder der er dumme nok til sĂ¥dan noget pjat
Hand breaking Win!
I guess busting a nut is harder than it looks.
THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!
wow. that was skill
I have to say,
Guess you really didn’t have to after all…
You didn’t give them time to finish. I always thought the interrupt cow was a bad joke.
Cowtus interruptus?
MOOve out of the way?
*gives slowpoke a pat on the back*
Ewwwwwwwww.
Backs are OK.
Wow what an idiot, you need a proper support if your going to split coconuts which require many square pounds of pressure to split by hand
Yeah…he should have put on a bra!
I would like to get my hands on her coconuts.
hey, that’s radhuspladsen in copenhagen, i go to school a block from there.
It’s all very good learning how to defend yourself against coconuts, but what happens if someone comes at you with a point-ed stick?
or even worse … a REALLY point-ed stick!
Doom awaits us all. I plan to live my life to the very full till that fateful day such a monstronsity is created. Thank God I have a time machine.
*pulls out gun*
Busts a few Caps
*takes out a banana*
Where did you take it to? Somewhere nice I hope.
Without knowing the translation, you get the impression this dude just turns up and ASSUMES he can break 100 coconuts with her bare palm. How ironic. Because he couldn’t. But he tried anyway. But he couldn’t. And he’s Danish.
But he couldn’t.
Waiting for the sequel…
Head butting bowling balls…
*clank clank clank*
Holy cow!
He killed Milky Joe
Don’t you mean almond joy?
No, Milky Joe.
Way too Milky…
Needs more crunch…
Forgot, crunched the hand…
Sorry…
did he even hit a coconut? even once?
I like as he’s hesitating before trying the last punch
DUH? The last three hurt.
Clang!
I think he broke at least more coconuts than most of you could break with their bare hand
We tear telephone books apart here.
What’s your point?
ER? head?
I just was wondering what Sum2 was compensating for.
Cocohuevos?
Or the lack thereof.
*lack lack lack*
An empty sack sack sack.
Need I say no… Big
mac mac mac
Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack…
All dressed in black black black…
With silver buttons, buttons, buttons…
All down her back back back…
She asked her mother, mother, mother…
For fifty cents, cents, cents…
To see the elephant, elephant, elephant,
Jump the fence, fence, fence!
How did they find that many coconuts in Denmark?
Leftovers from Sniper School..
Picture that exploding.
Migrating swallows carry them over.
hand breaking: WIN!
Coconut win
Stupid EURO’s
had to get that in…..
You have the best failblog avatar I have seen yet.
Nay, you.
Ooh! Ooh! *waves hand frantically* I think… it’s a pinwheel! Definitely a pinwheel! Do I get a prize? *waits eagerly*
I vote shuriken.
I vote. . . .
*SQUEEZE*
*Grabs the pinwheel and gets blown away by the wind*
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Gee, it pulled him right out of his chiair..
why the hell do people keep trying to break those things?
get a machete and be done with it.
*waits for coconut cake*
Er’, Called swords and axes in Europe.
Landscapers here use machete’s.
Exactly…
What is the average flight speed of an unlaidened swallow?
10 FPH (Fails Per Hour)
I really don’t want to feel sorry for the guy, on account of he’s a complete moron, but watching him FAIL I can’t help it.
that was actually kinda sad….
This was beyond FAIL. That was just lunacy. Round objects on a metal shoot with hinges. I could not even laugh. I’m out of laughter for the night and the rest of the week.
wax on wax off!! now go wax my hummeR!!!!!
This is so disturbing. He misses the very first one and shatters his hand yet he is determined not to fail(ironically). All of you guys calling him a “wus” would be rolling on the floor crying
Umm .. no, cause i would have enough sense not to do it.
Smart man. And I mean that.
Hee!
(Nice to see the wolf back again, ErickB.)
not if he hasn’t seen my pair of coconuts….
haha ye it’s danish national live tv xD
NOW THAT IS A FAIL
I’m rarely one to complain on blogs. Failblog is one of my favourite sites. But I found this video too shocking for general consumption. It’s a guy seriously damaging himself, in real life, in a painfully graphic way. I know some people will have different levels of tolerance for this kind of thing, and I know that I’ve had little problem with other similar videos (e.g. the guy coming off the skateboard and getting it between the legs) but for some reason this one makes me squeamish, and genuinely disturbs me. It could be that it’s the guys hand, or the nature of the thing he’s chopping at.
I’m aware that other people will feel differently, and many will say “if you can’t stand the heat” and I’m prepared to accept that. I think that if I came across this kind of thing again on failblog I’d have to simply stop checking it because it was too disturbing.
I realise failblog has “g-rated” option. I’m considering this, but I don’t have a problem with rude/swearing etc… That’s often the funniest stuff, and it would be sad to have to filter that out too.
I suggest that when it comes to videos, they should indicate whether someone gets hurt in the video before we decide to watch it. The other one where the guy teaching the kids shot himself had a similar response in me. Please failblog have some kind of warning system for your videos.
Is it just me that wants this? Sorry if I sound like a wuss, but I’m just being honest!
Eh, come on. He does it FOUR TIMES! The TV-woman had to stop him. He wanted to continue. He can’t have hurt himself that bad.
Dude, that guy WRECKED himself. Watch it again. If he wasn’t on camera and all pumped up he would have stopped after the first miss, I’ll bet.
If you think that’s bad then DON’T WATCH THIS:
Well, at least he got 15 done, which is more than one can say about this guy.
Yeah, Danish!
I rememeber when this was on TV =D
So faaar out =P
I’m prett sure it wasn’t serious though ^^
This is one of the most funniest thing i ever have seen. Dk 4 ever ;P
Ouch.
Recipy for good fail:
1. Have a crazy idea!
2. Do not think through the idea, but instead go directly to implementing the idea.
3. Make sure the implementation is such that any failure of the idea leads to extra pain.
4. Do not, I repeat NOT try it out in advance. Instead, make the first attempt live on national television.
PLEASE I WANT TO SEE YOUR WATERMARK ON MORE VIDEOS I’VE SEEN ELSEWHERE LONG AGO.
is that amsterdam central square?
It’s rĂ¥dhuspladsen (central square of Copenhagen)
Erm, this actually IS an epic fail. Like failing to break world record of swimming because the water is covered with ice. How about trying to break green coconuts actually? (that’s where the record is set)
BTW he wins is not really showing how much pain he experienced
ALL DANES FAIL!
SUCKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!
How do we know he’s trying to break them. He could be trying to hit as many coconuts as possible before breaking his hand.
assuming that he was trying to break the coconuts, this is a great fail. i dont think he even manages to hit one straight on, let alone break it- htink about it, if he broke one youd see the milk coming out of it. i haev broken a coconut before, so i would know.
Wow. What a fool.
AHAHAHHAHHAAAH
*masturbates*
In Soviet Russia, coconuts break you!
I can’t believe there are 491 comments and no one has made this joke yet.
I can, seeing as he’s danish. But f*** it, right? It’s all Europe!
who reads these comments!?
p.s. don’t think if you make a comment to this statement that i’ll read it
I didn’t even read YOUR comment.
Hand breaking WIN!
He should use de lime. Put de lime in the coconut, then you feel better.
I’m pretty sure he can break them, however I don’t think coconuts are really the best thing to try and break with your hand. They’re round so that’s less surface area for your hand to hit successfully when you’re swinging it down really hard and fast like that. Plus there’s nothing to secure them so as soon as he gets a hit it just flies off to the side. And the rain wasn’t working in his favor, either. He should have just stuck to the usual wooden boards XD
They give out degrees too easily these days. It makes having a black belt a joke now, despite the intense training and discipline you’d have to go through normally in a regular school.
Its understandable that a person couldn’t break a coconut, but to miss it and hit the stand? What?
“Boards don’t hit back”…
But coconuts, they just roll away!
Ouch! I think he needs glasses…and probably a cast.
Coconut beats loser =]
Why do you hate us so much? :,(
I dont hate you…
painful to watch
I want to see him do it with lobsters. Yeah…live lobsters, that would be cool.
Yes, and if he kept them in their shrinkwrap, they wouldn’t get away!
And yet… You did read them.
Also, you failed to relate your own post to the quote “topic of fail.”
I could go on about your superfluous use of foul language and ironically
misspelled name, but *yawwwwn* I have a few more asinine posts to make before I turn in
Haha, its on DR1. A danish channel. In the evening show, the most crappy program in DR’s history. lol
If he actually broke the metal bar, then it would have been funnier x3
accuracy fail
haha it was so funny i saw this when it was live, and me and my brother just couldn’t stop laughing it was so funny hihi (i’m from denmark)
Don’t bust a nut.
Hey, it’s from the danish program “aftenshowet”, “the evening show”.
Denmark rules!!!
Just a minor correction to the danes here.
Actually I believe he’s not saying “Jeg slog til bjælken” (I hit the bar) but, speaking with an accent, probably from the southern Jutland, saying “Jeg troede det virkede” (I thought it worked).
I’m not sure though.
zomfg rofl ololol learn2aim nap xD
lol the swedes should leave the kungfu to the asians
I saw this on danish television, and I can that it isn’t the first time they bring a person like mr. karate here into the show.
they even made fun of in the same show the next day.
kkkk
Dont, dont, dont, dont
That Made My Hand Hurt…. Then Again I Was Masturbating…
i dont get it
why didnt he try this when nobody was watching to see if he was able to do it….
another reason why white people and martial arts don’t mix…
metal win
That man doesn’t deserve his gi and that black belt… -_-
Coconut win
LOL retard!!!!!!!!!! hand breaking win!!!