Click to see G-Rated Pics and Movies Only
« Previous Tasty Fail | Paint Job Win Next »
» 541 Failures in Communication
-
Recent Comments
RedHeadedStepChild on If Christina Aguilera is the s… RedHeadedStepChild on So, I just pee into the DVD… tehawesomesauce on If Christina Aguilera is the s… Arthur Eld on If Christina Aguilera is the s… Old guy on If Christina Aguilera is the s… RedHeadedStepChild on So, I just pee into the DVD… Admiral Apparent on If Christina Aguilera is the s… Arthur Eld on If Christina Aguilera is the s… Daliddlkid on So, I just pee into the DVD… Arthur Eld on If Christina Aguilera is the s… 
Cheezburger Network Blog
ouch
ice melts
see ice melt.
melt ice melt.
Bad ice! Don’t melt so fast ice!
fat ice! melt so fast Ice fat!
This ice melts just like frozen water!
Maybe he should have made a frozen water sculpture instead.
Damn you! Greenhouse gasses! >:(
duh
Fat fatty fat fat.. >: | … ice
Iced that one. Cone of phrase.
Hoof hearted? Ice melted.
i smell
we know.
I blame global warming for this one.
Stop being so cold
You’re as cold as ice, you’re willing to sacrifice our art…
More like; what happens when you sleep off physics classes.
ice ice baby.
burning ice baby
the sculpture stay alive?
Wait. Ice melts?
NO Silly! Water Unfreezes!
Not too tasty. Try patty melts instead.
Almost looked like the guy was crushed by it.. that would suck.
That would have made it more amusing…
You are a TERRIBLE PERSON! And yet…bwahaha…
Why thank you…that’s what my parents tell me every night before bed
And you SIR are a Wet Stringy Congealed Wheat Paste Person,
with Squished Vegetable Matter Slop all over you!
HA!
ARrGH! Noodle Male was bad enough, and now this!?!?
I had no idea my name was so susceptible to sudden attacks of puns and/or word insertions!
I may be invulnerable to tazers, but clearly not to squirrels.
*starts to cry tears of tomato sauce*
Come on! Man up dude, man up! Well then, mr. small rodent of the family Sciuridae, whose meat is considered to have only a slight gamey taste and can be exchanged for chicken in most cookbooks, and whose meat can be rolled up into meatballs which taste delicious on PASTA!
Ha! I am not worried, I live on a University Campus, a Gun Free Zone, well away from the Physics and Chemistry Buildings where hazardous things happen every year! I am fed, housed, clothed, and adored by Faculty, Staff and Students. If a Heathen Pastafarian like yourself ever tried to harm me the Animal Husbandry Dept. would finally have a Live Volunteer Test Human for their Primate/Crocodile Mating Experiments. the She-Croc ate all the gorillas so far.
*Raises hand* I’ll volunteer!
NO JJ! Let’s try this again, OK?
The Female Crocodile Test Subject has EATEN all of the Male Test Subjects she’s introduced to so far. Even the 640 Lb Gorilla wearing Body Armour.
He may be confusing this with the animal husbandry course.
You know, in Lebanon, animal husbandry takes on a whole different meaning.
That is some very relevant knowledge right there.
Really Relevant Knowledge™ As always brought to you by FAIL Blog’s most smarterest skwerl!
That’s legal now??
Ever tried to introduce her to an actual crocodile? That may solve the problem..
Campus Tomato Soup in a can???
I don’t think crocodiles eat spaghetti so HA! I WIN ANYWAY!
And college kids are wimps, 5 or 6 tazer shocks and they go down easy.
I seem to remember that it takes a lot more than that to get a college guy to go down…
It took threats and begging as I remember it.
You really don’t know the secret? Just tell him there’s beer down there.
Most of the ones I dated weren’t THAT easy to fool. Besides, none of them were an GOOD at anyway.
Just trick them by telling them no one can beat the last guy you were with. They will hop right to it to prove you wrong. And the work ethic is tremendous when there is something to prove.
Beer and competition. It’s imprinted in the male’s DNA.
I will have to remember that one Ryannon!
It’s gotta be better than that whole “begging” thing.
It was more of a bribing thing, really.
Well, us poor guys usually hafta beg for a half assed BJ.
I’ll trade you
doubleTRIPLE the time you spend on me.What the hell do you think I bribed them with?
Private access to that slippy warm thingy ‘tween yer legs?
Among other things, I WAS referring to that which it seems you must beg for.
Oh? So I don’t have to beg for that then, cool!
Oh, no…you’ll have to beg for it, just like everyone else.
*BEG BEG BEG*
All right…who stole my avatar???
If you ‘fess up now, you won’t get *FOOOM!!*ed. I promise.
Ok. The blogmonster is just having fun with us now.
Hmph.
*is happy to see her dragon back*
It didn’t even show that I posted a reply to Sammy! The reply went up, but not on ” Recent Comments. I blame the blogmonster. Again.
Do you guys ever get the feeling that there’s a bunch of 9th graders that started running this site as a CompSci Homeroom Project and now they’re waaaay outta their league. It does explain the posting of new Fails during Recess & Lunch times & after School.
If this site was started by a bunch of 9th graders (who don’t get a recess btw) these kids are RICH!! And smart. And deserve to jump ahead to college!
Well, they can’t get rich off of me. I never click ads, you never know when one will viciously bite your hard drive and eat your
porn stashimportant data files.That’s not how it works. The folks with the ad’s? They pay the site to have the privilege of being able to show us their ad’s. Not that all of us can see them.
*loves her Adblock Plus*
*ditto*
.
And that’s why woman prefer older men… we know what a woman wants and aren’t shy about it..
.
I think we will have this problems licked in no time.
And just how old are you Erick?
Old enough to know better.
Young enough to do it anyway.
Hehehe…I think he’s about my age!
Hmmmm…..
heh.. old enough to know what to do and young enough to still do it
like going down at the crack of ice?
DONT TAZE ME BRO!! >:O
That’s horrible! And funny….mostly funny.
Put ice on it to reduce the swelling.
If you don’t have ice, use frozen water.
Yeah. Not that nasty dihydrogen monoxide stuff.
Putting water in the freezer is cool if you want to keep boiling water ready made for later.
Also good if you want to make instant water. Put some in a bukkit, add water and ta daa!
crushed ice.
More like Ice Crushed.
artist fail. resonance win.
Nice comment – what a friggin genius you must think you are.
holy shit…that sucks
i feel so bad 4 that guy. hard work 4 nothing
Failtastic
Should have made it with frozen water.
It works just like ice.
And it’s cheap.
But does it carve like ice?
Very similarly, actually.
And it looks very similar also.
Does it blend?
Does it float?
In this case, it’s a witch.
I think there’s a duck frozen in it.
If it floats, its not ice. Its a duck…made out of wood…
Does it bend?
Or just balance the sculpture better…like a bigger socket/base instead of the tiny. Hope they learned their lesson until next year
That totally felt like yesterday at the office.
Or the US economy.
Dude, the ice didn’t COMPLETELY break. It wasn’t THAT bad.
The fundamentals of the ice sculpture are strong!
Roffle!
LOL
If it’s too be compared to the US economy, you’d have to put bu$h in there, carving the sculture with a sledgehammer.
Oops, hang on, I have to answer the Secret Service at my door.
And have some guy going around with a collection tin asking for 700B to use to fix it with.
Comment placement fail.
>:( my bad. Internet Explorer refresh fail.
Internet Explorer user fail.
Hey, internet explorer rarely ever fails me. Not like my experience with the supposedly superior firefox *shudder*.
I use it only because the data applications I use are only certified for IE. If I use Firefox, the data comes out wonky. Otherwise, I would never IE. I have too many issues with it.
Such as…?
Abandonment, lies, cheating …
If you want comment placement fail, how about this:
Does anyone know why I have trouble posting comments when there are more than 200 or so? It’s a bit frustrating.
At 200 comments failblog servers start shutting down because it’s nearly guarenteed that all appropriate puns have already been used.
And “First!” has been posted 175 times….
They are being posted but don’t show up unless you click the “show all” link. There are other workarounds too but they are all a total pain in the a$$. Failblog does not seem too eager to work on this problem either. I know that my participation has decreased quite a bit since they went to the paging process.
ahhhh!! So that’s what happened to you!!!
And yeah – hit the “show all” link on top and it works very well. I have never had a comment show up in the wrong places, and only a couple of double comments.
After reading through the comments section on a fail I would then just click on the “Recent Comments” to go directly to the new ones. But this doesn’t work on fails with more then one page.
.
You either have to paste in “?cp=all” before the comment-######
parm each time, or get the comment number from hover over the recent
comment and then entering it as the comment number in the address bar. PITA, total PITA! (oh great now I’m hungry for a falafel sandwich)
Oh great. Now I am, too.
We’ve missed you, Raelalt.
Why thank you! I also took a long weekend from the computer this past one. Plus I became officially engaged Thursday night. Yep gonna try it a second time, only I got a winner this time.
WOOHOOOOOO!!!!
*breaks out the bubbly*
Woo hoo hoo!!!! Congrats!!!! And congrats to the new Mrs. Raelalt!! She done good!
Congratulations realalt! That is wonderful.
Thank you everyone. I’m pretty excited about it. A year
ago I would have given my chances of finding someone
this meaningful to me as absolutely nil. Then about 11
months ago I meet her. From just friends to best friends to
lovers. Can’t beat it.
*happy sigh*
Maybe there’s hope for me, yet.
Of course there is. Don’t even think otherwise.
That is awesome Raelalt! Best wishes!
(I know that’s what you’re supposed to say to the bride-to-be, but My spell checker growled at me when I tried to spell the other one)
Congratulations Raelalt! I wish the two of you much happiness!
Congratulations and best wishes Raelalt!
Konga Rats on yur knot furst raelalt! *chuckle*
Congratulations!
Congratulations!!
Congratulations!
In Soviet Russia, you have to type “?CCCP=all”!
I would have thought it would be “?CCCP=gone”.
That’s in Modern Russia.
(Oh, and a belated congrats on your engagement!)
Thanks!
Hey, we’re not in the 70s. Her bush was clearly shaved.
So was ours. But it took 8 years of living with an unsightly mess.
I’m just gonna admit it: I’m in love with the I’ll Be Bach t-shirt girl. There. I said it.
Someone beat me to the “frozen water” gag, so I had to come up with an alternate post.
I’ll Be Bach t-shirt? All I see it Hot Mama 4 Obama…
Do they sell the girl as well?
They sold the ‘ON SALE’ banner.
But whatever you do, don’t sell the fire extinguisher!
Sell it? I can’t even get it out of the locker.
I keep seeing VANILLA ICE RINGTONES! Accck!
oh look! the “Hot Mama 4 Obama” Mama.
She’s not Hot until I can see her “Come Hither” Eyes.
*Puts on “Come Hither” eyes*
*Falls in Love*
*Falls out of Tree*
@#$% ?%$@*!!
Umm, I’m OK!
You might want to put some ice on that, Skwerlly.
Or, at the very least, a cold shower.
It will help with the swelling.
completely off topic and i apologize, but myspace says you fail
I know… myspace accidenty my account
Was it the squirrel porn videos that got you banned?
Im’ likin’ – “No Worry Beef Curry”
baba
Yikes, I read that as “beef curtains” at first.
*gets glasses*
Watch out for that potato.
Yikes! Flashbacks to previous fails!
Yup…that one is HAWT!!!
On Topic FAIL!
-Doc
The “Drink Your Milkshake” girl is bangin’ too.
The Giant Gummy Bear On A Stick is clearly the best advertisement of the day.
and clearly you are a douchebag
HUH? What’s the the “I heart lamps” T-Shirt? Is that an american inside joke?
It’s from the movie Anchorman (one of my favorites). It’s Steve Carell’s not-so-bright character trying to talk about love. He just looks at a lamp and says “I love … lamp”.
Yeah, I pretty much was just coming here for the cute t-shirt girl in the bikini bottoms and to look at Mookie’s icon of the day. But neither are here today. Sigh.
There’s advertisement on this site?
Don’t tell me you surf without AdBlock?
How can you people stand that load of trash?
I prefer the trash. I want to see if the ads know something I don’t know when it asks if I know if my man is gay or not.
The trash amuses me as well. I’m sad that I have yet to see the “gay Chubby dating” one that people keep talking about.
Without advertisements, how would we ever have come to know the greatness of Gummy Bears on Sticks?
Dentists need to hand those out instead of lollipops. They would be in business for years.
People come to this site for something OTHER than the fascinating advertisements? Good golly….
Hey buddy! Zebra bikini-bottoms girl may be trash, but that’s the way we like ‘em in the good ol’ U.S of A. Or wonder woman in a scuba outift. Or Sarah Palin in a stars and stripe bikini holding a shotgun.
Honsetly, if she has more teeth than tits, she’s worth a once over…maybe.
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure
I love that the people are still cheering them on in the end, despite the fact that they’re failures. Awesome.
I would cheer HARDER after it crashed, are you kidding me?
It was actually a brilliant piece of performance art performed at a local production of failure on ice.
I apologize in advance if I messed up the italics thing
Shame we don’t have the video of Failure on Fire. Now THAT was a brilliant performance.
Fire???
But we have a photo of it.
uh, that’s what you get making things out of ice?
No, Sir, that is what YOU get for not using capital letters.
What, for not capitalizing his words, he gets an ice sculpture crashing down around his head?
This thread is controlled the the grammar police. Are you proud of me now, mr. cuddles?
Uh, I think “the the” grammar police have put out an APB for you. You may want to lay low for a while, I’ll try to cover for you.
*police cars arrived*
We have you surrounded! Do not attempt to escape!
*Sigh* I give up! What’s the sentence?
Just a warning. Just don’t do it again.
*wags finger*
It’s a grammatical unit of one or more words typically expressing a single statement, question, request, command, ect.
Bravo!
ectoplasm?
EGGpalm?
That’s what we were trying to figure out.
That video left me cold and shattered.
That sent a chill down my spine.
The atmosphere was quite cold.
Ice-aw it coming.
Egg-sactly.
That has nothing to do with ice. Pun run fail. D:
Brain freeze. I was running out of ice jokes.
We’ve done the egg puns, like, 239,408,892 times now. I don’t think there’s any more egg puns left to be had.
Yeh, I’m pretty sure there’s not. There’s barely even any pasta puns left after that last exchange, *coughs* thanks to skwerlly *coughs*
I would make a pun here too, but….
I’m not sure how to break the ice.
Hammers work pretty well.
Icicle of having to think up smart puns.
…Oh, who am I kidding? I LOVE IT.
I’m off to make an iceberg lettuce salad. Brb!
Polar Bearsbreak the ice quite well too
You sneak up on them and kick them in the ice hole.
Oh wait, wrong punchline.
Those artists have ice water in their veins.
I froze when I noticed this.
This was actually a VH1 anthology of Vanilla Ice’s career
Do you mean analogy?
fail
On failblog?! I don’t believe it!!!
Are you gobsmacked?
I actually smacked my gob today.
that… actually sounds kind of gross. I think I need a translator on this one.
Are you insinuating that Dragonwriter has a gross gob?
Hey…yeah! I have a lovely gob, theng-kew-veddy-much!
:p
Unless he meant you have 144 gobs and if that is the case…*scootch*
*scootches back* I would like you even if you have a gross of gross’ of gobs.
he had a career?
I DID NOT EXPECT THAT!
Please tell me you were being sarcastic.
I was being sarcastic
It was the most predictable fail ever.
OR WAS I?
But…that would be a paradox.
*head explodes*
I beat your paradox with a straight inconsistency.
Not so quick, I have a forever oxymoron.
Well, I guess I won’t bother to mention my apophasis.
Schrodingers conversation, apparently.
Mobius’ thread, allegedly
Poker recognition fail.
You poker, you brought her.
I’m not even going to TALK about the Admiral’s many poker (apo)phasis.
OH no! A forever oxymoron? ITS THE END OF THE WORLD
I’m lying
I see your forever oxymoron and raise you one looping juxtoposition.
I agree with noodleguy. I fully expected it to defy the law of gravity and be able to hold the great weight reaching out past the main pedestal. Engineering fail.
I was totally disappointed, where are the frozen rainbows?
Okay, you were being sarcastic. Oh, and you’re a cab, too.
Surely, you jest.
No I am not, and don’t call me Shirley.
You know me to be of infinite jest, most excellent fancy.
The joke does not go like that!
It’s
“Call me a cab, my good man”
“Alright, sir, but you look more like a Rolls to me.”
Yes, sweets…he was employing subtlety in a screamingly hilarious manner.
What did you expect? The spanish inquisition?
NO ONE EXPECTS THE SPAN.. *cough cough*
*throws a bucket of water on fluffy the fish*
Better?
You just made my aquarium overflow…
I didn’t either. I expected it to tip over, or somebody to do some shit to it
Nobody expected that!
I think that video should have been cut by at least 20 seconds.
Yeah, I almost fell asleep actually.
That was the caffeine crash.
It’s called building to a climax. You just have to hum the tension building music to yourself to get the effect.
Dude, you’re right. This video is so much better if you play that song that goes “da da da DA! dadadadA! Da Da DA!” in the back of your head while you watch it.
Also…
The song “The Final Countdown” is now playing in your head.
Indeed it is. Two and half more hours ’til I leave work. “Dada Da Da! Dadadadada!”.
Here, allow my 6 yr old to fix that!
“Have a Hol-LEEE Jol-LEEE Christ-MAST!
It’s the BEST Time of the YEARRRR!
I don’t snow if it will SNOW,
but have some cups odd CHEEEER!”
{REPEAT 600 times on the way to school!}
I’ll accept your repititious singing and raise you 1,000 idiotic computer users.
I accept your 1,000 idiotic computer users and raise you one 720 degree pie.
I’ll trade you a potato stuffed vicar for that 720 degree pie.
I’ll pass on the pie. I’m still trying to finish my steel plate pizza.
I’ll save the pie for later. My titanium fish and chips are getting cold.
I have both the little one singing and the idiot users.
1000 !!
Why, that’s more than….. uh, a lot!
Do you work on a University Campus ?
Unfortunately, no. My users are office workers and think that all I.T. does is collect paychecks and browse the Internet all day.
And…?
What?! Are you trying to say something?
And he’s proving them right.
Pretty much what most of us are doing.
I’ll see your 1,000 computer users and raise you one single class of Freshman composition students.
I’ll see your freshmen and raise you an entire week spent with my very religious, very conservative family!
Fold!
DON’T FOLD THE COINS!
I see your conservative family and raise you a bunch of whiny sick adults who cant take care of a common cold and you wonder how they survived to adult hood.
I’ll see your whiny sick adults and raise you my sister-in-law. (She will never move out.)
*hug!*
Thank you. I needed that. *hugs back*
I do! I browse the Internet all day.
My users are really, really smart and astute State Workers.
They never ever break, jam, or burn up anything or get lost in the stairway or totally forget how to do a procedure they’ve been doing for 10-15
years.
Actually the only reason I have nothing else to do is that the
equipment is being relocated and they’re not using it.
What I wouldn’t give to have users like that
((((
siiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh…. gotta go show someone how to double-click again…
I just taught someone how to copy-paste…
I taught someone how to print.
These were QUITE a few years ago but:
.
I had to show someone how to turn their PC on because it “wasn’t working”. (They kept switching the monitor on/off but with no results.)
.
Then there was the Communications Dir. who deleted all his DOS
system files because “I don’t use those files”. I had to re-install his operation system.
.
The Community Development Manager who called me up to complain that her CD jammed her CD drive. I couldn’t remember installing a CD drive in her machine, and when I went over to her office I had to replace her damaged 5″
floppy drive.
*roffle!* That brings back memories. My old boss once put a CD in a 5 1/4″ floppy drive.
I had to dismantle the thing to get it out.
Supervisors. Can’t live with ‘em. Can’t shoot ‘em.
uhhh.. yeah… I’m a supervisor….
Eep!
*hands in the TPS report*
*heads to the bathroom and borrows some TP from Dragonwriter*
Damn…it was stuck to my shoe, wasn’t it?
Ummmm…. yeahhh…. *sips coffee* I’m gonna need you to…. um…. *sips coffee* …come in on… um… Saturday….
Is that my stapler?
Who wants birthday cake?
I’ll take Cake. Who gets the Birthday?
But the cake isn’t included.
The cake is a lie.
We’re putting new cover sheets on all the TPS reports before they go out now. So if you could go ahead and try to remember to do that from now on, that would be great!
Here and let me just give you a copy of this memo.
.
*thinks he is going to have to keep an eye on things – is a supervisor too* Hehe I make my medics do most of the work so I can have more time for surfing
I have a sudden urge to beat the hell out of my network printer.
Meh, I think you all need more flair.
You know what they say. “A watched ice sculpture never breaks’
I talked to They, They says they never said “That”!
They says HE said “That” and that they said “Something Else”
“That” being said, He said that “That” was not the “That” that which They said He said.
Hmph. My brain hurts.
Skwerlly Bob, you must be veeeerrrrry bored.
Yes.
The rule says I have to be here, it doesn’t say a word about what to do if there’s nothing to do. Plus I’ve had WAY Too Much Coffee!
Coffee makes all squirrels go nuts.
*Reads Skwerl Manual, Chapter 7*
OMFG! “Caffine is NOT Recomended for Skwerls EVER!”
What will I do with my $150 Starbuck Gift Card now?
Well… we could exchange it in for money, and then use it to by some things for us to use… together…
*Blush*
*buy
They say a lot of things, don’t they?
That is because “That” is what She said. Or so They keep telling Me.
I didnt even notice that last pillar until they knocked it out… good thinking!
Good thinking? I suppose if the goal was to destroy hours of work, knocking out a supporting pillar is good thinking. Reminds me of the time my father collapsed the garage while renovating…
How do you know that wasn’t the goal? I bet the point was to destroy it, and that’s why the people are cheering at the end. Probably they wanted to make it easier to clean up before it melted. It probably isn’t even a fail TT_TT
I was just thinking the same thing. It’s the same reason why it’s not a fail when I take the support out of my house of cards and send it crashing down. I hold out hope, however, that they had intended for the structure to stand without the pillars, and that this is still a fail.
Thank you, noodleG.
This was actually a brilliant piece of performance art.
A metaphor for life, the economy, American politics, etc etc.
WIN!
Waiter, more champagne!
And plenty of ice.
Yes, sir, and might I recommend the Bread option tonight? It’s th house special, and should go nicely with the sheet metal pizza you ordered as well…
Here’s the e you dropped…
Thanks! I was wondering where I put that!
I love how the guy just walks off like he has already made peace with the fact that he is most certainly fired.
If he has any intelligence he should melt the evidence.
Psssshhhh, he isn’t worried. You know why? Because this is OBVIOUSLY PHOTOSHOPPED. The shadows are ALL WRONG.
Hush NoodleBrain! Or I will steal your Pasteurized Processed Parmesan Cheese Food Substitute Topping.
Because this is OBVIOUSLY NOT PHOTOSHOPPED!
It’s all COMPUTER GENERATED by GEORGE LUCAS HIMSLEF!
No idiot would try to carve a REAL Ice Sculpture THAT BIG!
It’s easy to see that it is COMPUTER GENERATED because
the guy with the chainsaw, (Lucas used a CGI of himself),
DISAPPEARS for Seconds when he should be visible.
Plus the refraction gradient is off 16%! Gawd! Wake UP!
Pride goes before a fall.
Or after a crash, as the case may be.
‘Tis pride that pulls the sculpture down.
Now is the winter of our discontent.
I have no ice to cool the sides of my intent, but only freezing ambition, which o’erbalances itself, and falls on my druthers.
If you lick us do we not bleed? If you tipple us do we not quaff? If you poise-end us do we not die?
Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of winter! That this foul ice shall melt above the earth.
What a piece of work is a blogger, how noble in failing, how
infinite in frailty, in forum and typing how express and
admirable, in diction how like an angel, in punning how like
a god! The beauty of the internet, the paragon of colloquy. . .and yet,
to a scoffer, what is this quintessence of dust? Bloggers delight not trolls nor combo breakers neither, though by our loling we seem to say so.
Tut, tut, thou art all ice, thy kindness freezeth.
Madam, I swear I use no ice art at all. That I am hoar , ’tis true: ’tis true ’tis rime; and rime ’tis ’tis true: a frozen figure; But defrost it, for I will use no ice art.
Some say the fail will end in fire;
Some say in ice.
From what I’ve tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to fail twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To know that for failing ice
Is also great
And would suffice.
You sir have set a truck on fire and ice on a sculpture . Two fails covered in one frosty quote. Hats off to you EB!
*doffs!*
Thank you good sir, for those kind words.
I was concerned that I would receive a frosty reception or be flamed for twisting such a beloved wordsmith’s words.
Oh pfft. We twist words all the time. There are no sacred cows on Failblog!
(sorry, Mookie!)
…Winter kept us warm, covering
Earth in forgetful snow, feeding
A little life with dried tubers.
Summer surprised us, coming over the Starnbergersee…
I am SO glad that wasn’t me! Yikes.
You’re an ice sculpture!?
With frozen assets?
Well, that WOULD hurt, but I really meant is that if I was the guy with the chainsaw, I would be really embarrassed.
pssst.. they know what you meant… they just wanted to have a little fun…
*draws up 25cc of humor* Ok nurse Fluffy sendin the next victim.. er .. patinet.
Oh dear…!
So no one was killed? Then why was there so much applause after it collapsed?
Maybe the audience didn’t like the sculpture?
Or they were sadists?
This sculptor specializes in busts.
After that crash, I think the bank might have to freeze his assets though.
I would have preferred if he carved a pair of snow balls.
You prefer balls over busts?
NTTAWWT, of course.
I’d try to liquidate his holdings.
Win!
Physics are a b!tch, ain’t they?
*grabs red grammar pen* Wow, where do I begin?
Bwahaha, this could take even you a while.
I’d start by asking for clarification as to what exactly one phsyic is.
You know though, he could be referring to physics as in the word meaning a medicine. In that case though, what do medical treatments have to do with collapsing ice structures?
Feed a cold, bury a fever. . .in ice?
*takes red grammer pen, hands him big red Sharpie* There you go.
*grabs big red Sharpie and hands him a big red paintbrush* There you go.
*Grabs red paintbrush and hands over a shrubbery*
*holding shrub* What am I supposed to do with this? I don’t even like bush… :-/
*ponders the last reply*
And he wonders why he keeps getting the Chubby Gay Dating site ads.
I have yet to see any of those ads. I’m quite disappointed…
*signs mr. cuddles up for a gay dating service*
Yay!
I’m so excited!
Hee! Let us know how it turns out, okay?
*goes outside and makes mr. cuddles a pair of snow balls*
I hear he has his first date with Bruce this weekend.
Oh come on JJ, it was spelt right there in front of you…grammAr.
I knew there was a reason my English teacher hated me…
*sigh*
We are so universally despised. I think only dentists are hated more.
Uh, no. Ever heard of lawyers? (present failbloggers exempt
of course. We like Mookie.)
You are not a very nice person are you?
Hahah! I’m one of the nicest people you will ever meet
*Takes away red grammar pen, hands cuddles a paint roller*
I would respond but I might one-up you
That’s ok, I’d most likely enjoy you being on top.
Ryannon gets shear joy being on top.
I am usually a cut above when I am on top.
You and Christopher really are quite a pare.
I enjoy his thrusts and he enjoys my parries.
*takes a stab at this* You guys slay me!
Hew guys are the maim reason for the laughs around here.
I saw what you did there.
Don’t cut yourself out of that group, Admiral. You’ve provided some of the most hilarious snippets of humo(u)r around here.
Aw shucks. I carve out a little niche. Only about seven people get more than half of my comments, anyway.
Well with such a sharp wit, you should expect that.
No dice – he should expect a better percentage of his comments to be appreciated… (*makes pie chart*)
AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAH! That was funny. Shame, it was a pretty sculpture.
OLDER THAN INTERNET FAIL. Fuck this stupid website. Stop putting your water mark on stuff that we’ve all seen YEARS AGO.
And yet you keep coming here.
Tomorrow I’m going to walk in to the dump and complain about how much the place smells.
I will go to the toilet and yell at it for having so much shit in it.
Amazing how angry some folks get at a website that offers little snippets of humo(u)r for their amusement at no cost to them, and participation in which is completely voluntary.
Funny, the video doesn’t look like it was made over 30 years ago.
Oh, that was sad. It was a fail, but not because they were stupid. They knew and was prepared for that to happen, made a pretty sculpture, and it didn’t work.
Overreaching slightly is a fail, but not a funny fail.
Now I’m gonna watch a moron squash his car with a tree again. THAT was a funny fail.
Dang shame it failed. It looked like a really nice sculpture.
Poor EB, I think you have a case of ice envy.
He’s switching to styles to cubism.
Two to’s are one to too many.
But tutus for men were on sale, and I do not think it lessened a very squared away comment.
Even with two to’s, it’s still clear he Braque his sculpture.
“O, that this too, too solid flesh would melt!”
*crash!*
DAMMIT! I said MELT, not BREAK!!
We’re on quite a Hamlet run today, aren’t we?
So runs the world away.
The play’s the thing!
Fellow fail lovers, we need to look at the positive side of this fail. In one hand you have a destroyed piece of icey art. In the other hand, you now have a couple large pieces of ice that with a quick buzz of the chainsaw can be made into big beautiful VODKA SLIDES!!!!
It’s almost reminescent of a Tanqueray commercial.
Bacon vodka?
think of the guys’ thoughts when it started falling. probably something along the lines of “oh sh!t oh sh!t oh sh!t…. oh good it missed me. oh well it would’ve melted eventually…”
beats a house of cards falling down…
It’s better than watching Gellar bending silver spoons!
Goddamn that would suck!
What is the ice sculputre of? Looks like Lara Croft from Tomb Raider to me shooting at a bat or something?
Damnit…..I forgot to take the lens cap off!
Hehehe that funny….
This is not a fail, this is simply sad. Nice sculpture, a lot of work put into it.
Which is why it is a fail.
No, a fail is when someone is stupid or dumb and the result is funny. Here, they have bad luck (although, not very good engineering, yes) adn the result is sad.
cosmopolit3, you have to understand that some people find this kind of thing absolutely hilarious. I’m sure many are horrified to see this masterpiece tumbling down, but we are all different, which is what keeps the world together.
I thought glue kept the world together.
The end result of the FAIL is funny. Do not argue with the regulars over what constitutes a fail. Fails are subjective.
Besides, for those of us that are human, we get pleasure from other people’s misfortune. Just watch anybody’s children that are ten years or younger.
Gotta disagree with you there, Avis.
We’re not living in some postmodern fail-world.
This is a world where we should (and are!) not afraid to call a fail a fail!
Sheesh.
Ummm, thank you for saying the same thing I said, in a different manner. I think you misinterpreted my comment.
Buzzkill.
What does buzzkill mean? I am on the other side of the moon, we speak a different language here.
The dark side?
No, very bright here normally. Now we have night- just a hint: it is now 9:50 pm here…
So maybe you should head to bed instead of wasting time being a troll.
And yet, does not appreciate dark humor.
Bah! Mere seconds late!
the dark side of the moon is a good song, not humour. BTW, the beautie would melt here in half an hour.
Everything has its dark side, including humo(u)r.
*Need another hint. Do you have a red dust problem?*
There are still spaces available in my Humo(u)r 101 class, cosmo!
There is no dark side of the moon really. After all, it’s all dark.
which moon are you talking about?
*moons scotteh*
(_(_)
Your bum is a bit lopsided there, Ryannon. :p
It’s the pants, they make my butt look fat. I swear!
Oh. Mah. Gawd.
It is NOT a rape star girlfriend’s butt!
It looks to be a 3/4’s angle.
Buzzkill means that the buzz (enjoyment) is gone.
Hello! My name is Jon Maas – trying to find the original filmer of this clip. I’m from TruTV – hoping to feature this clip in our TV show…
Let me know if you know the person who filmed this! Email me at jmaas@nashentertainment.com – thanks!
Jon Maas
Segment Producer
TruTV
Please, stick to letting D list celebs make fun of criminal idiots. They deserve every crack Bonaducci makes about them. These guys have real talent, just needed to math this out better. Physics sucks.
Epic obvious scam fail, and obvious not going to work fail.
why does it take you so damn long to post these here when they are on your youtube account anything upto a week or two earlier
They go on the voting pages first.
We try to tell them, but then they think that that means that you guys are re-posting stuff.
The front of the sculpture looked like a pair of balls hanging………..
If you think those are balls, I think you need to see a urologist.
I think you need to see a GAY GUY OLOLOLOLOLOL?!~?!@
Ooookay…I think I’ll just brand you a troll and ignore you. Seriously, those kind of insults got Mr. sausage banned. Either that or he’s been arrested.
That makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
You sure it’s not the gerbil?
No, it’s a potato straight out of the oven.
I hope Nate took the foil off of his pomme de tear.
…ow.
Fuzzy potatoes… yummm.
I got so nervous watching that, although what can you expect on failblog
Definitely not the Spanish Inquisition!
No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.
What is that from?
Are you serious?
Be kind, I think Christopher is not from around these parts
Oh, alrigtht.
Christopher, the ’spanish inquisition’ thing is a sketch from the British Comedy Series ‘Monty Python’s Flying Circus’. Some of their most famous sketches include the ‘Dead Parrot’ sketch or the ‘Spam’ sketch.
Hence the awesome play Spamalot.
I say! Anyone for tennis?
Christopher ~ go to youtube and search for Monty Python Spanish Inquisition. You’ll be happy you did.
Hmm might have to finally go see that when i get back home
Don’t forget the Cheese Shop and the Argument Shop!
FAIL – sad one, not funny one
And you call yourself Lucifer, what a disappointment you must be to the rest of the fallen angels.
raelalt, I think you need glasses. His/her name is lightbringer.
lucis, light
ferre, to bring
Thank you AA.
And for BF4,
Lucifer was the bringer of light. the monotheists version of Prometheus.
*ponders*
.
hmm wasn’t sure if BF was being serious on that but it seems more often the younger generation is not as steeped in biblical knowledge as ours and previous generations.
I love it when you speak Latin.
*infernal laugh*
That was hawt.
239th! YES!
SUCK ME
Trying to find a one-night stand FAIL.
I lol’d!
This is a triple fail: the other two are on the website of the owner of the video credited below the video, 49 Designs.
Non-working Enter button: Fail!
Terrible website design on a website designer’s site: Fail!
No, wait there’s more!
Inconsistent text alignment: Fail!
Not a single working link or scrap of info, just an email address: Fail!
Yeah, yeah, I know; the cobbler’s children go barefoot. I can’t say I’ve never had a crappy website advertising web design. But I don’t anymore!
At least it doesn’t play sound when the page loads: Win!
HAHA I just clicked the link very true. Informative website TOTAL FAIL
Fail! it’s not ice, it’s frozen water.
This makes me sad.
gravity win
I’m pretty sure the “49 Designs” web site is the actual fail.
A good design tip–know when to STOP!
Man, I remember when this happened, it was at the World Ice Art Championships in Fairbanks. I don’t know why John was filming it though.
Why are all these recent videos keep getting taken down before I can see them??
That was some thin ice.
ouchh..very creative
I had the grilled cheese and fries in the cafeteria at work today. Wendy said it was the “kids meal”.
Are you cicili’s sibling?
ahh I’m missing our little non-seq ..
if u look closely under the sculpture right b4 it crumbles, there is a bird there…
BIRD FAIL
INGREDIENTS (Nutrition)
* 1 cup all-purpose flour
* 1 cup white sugar
* 1/4 teaspoon salt
* 2 cups cranberries
* 1/2 cup chopped walnuts
* 1/2 cup butter, melted
* 2 eggs
* 1 teaspoon almond extract
* add to recipe box Add to Recipe Box
My folders:
* add to shopping list Add to Shopping List
* add a personal note Add a Personal Note
DIRECTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease one 9 inch pie pan.
2. Combine the flour, sugar, and salt. Stir in the cranberries and the walnuts, and toss to coat. Stir in the butter, beaten eggs, and almond extract. If you are using frozen cranberries, the mixture will be very thick. Spread the batter into the prepared pan.
3. Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 40 minutes, or until a wooden pick inserted near the center comes out clean. Serve warm with whipped cream or ice cream.
Doe snot?
That was rather painful to watch… I knew what was going to happen. They should have stopped when they could. >.>
buba is sad
I’m sorry but I found this more sad than funny. A beautiful piece of artwork was completely destroyed, and it’s not like someone was just being stupid or being a douche or even being rude and they deserved it.
It was a straight up accident and just..sad.
My 14 y/o brother & I both read FailBlog pretty regularly, him more often than me, and he’s the one who showed me this and said “This isn’t funny, this is really sad…”
So, yeah, WHY are people laughing? Can someone explain the humor?
Someone had a worse day than I did?
Well, for one, it’s funny to watch things fall down. Sad or not, the human race has a natural delight in watching disasters. Second, it’s a fail because the guy was obviously a professional ice sculptor and had done this beautiful sculpture… and then started to saw through the pillar that supported the heaviest part of the sculpture. What was he thinking? That was a dumb move on anyone’s part, especially those who should know better, and thus deserves a fail.
Owned
Try
http://www.icealaska.com
It was at the world ice art championships. Multi-block. 5 days of competition, 4 people per team. Temperatures 0 to -50. It was Junichi Nakamura, world class ice sculpture, cutting the supports.
Every year people push the envelope and stuff falls over. Just usually isn’t filmed. Not sure why this one was. Just lucky I guess.
People are cheering because he walked away. It was about 20 tons of ice. It shook the ground when it went down. There is a documentary coming out (I’m in it)
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=jkIYYrKDyK8&feature=related
God, the comments here are so retarded.
Giddy-up Charlie. Looks like rain.
Amanda Senior.. there’s a German word that I couldn’t spell for the life of me but I’ll give you how it’s pronounced: Shaudenfroid or something…. it means taking joy from others’ misfortunes. A little like sadism but not as severe…. THAT’s why we’re laughing. Yea it’s sad but that’s the point.
Predictable fail is predictable. Should have been cut in length…
Uh, how is VANDALISM a fail??
He’s not a vandal, Einstein. He’s the artist.
SEX-AYE!
…well…now that that is over….lets make snow cones!
Ah ben merde alors.
xD So much effort put into a temporary piece of art. So not worth it.
There are much better sculpting materials out there people. xD
I am an Epoch Fail as a person, because i am reading these while i should be working…on an addtional entry about Earth for the Guide. Hmmm…Mostly Not Harmless?
why the hell did the sculpture have a set of cow udders for a foot, that’s what I want to know!
He should have used “water powder”. Just add water.
i want 2 africans and an asian.
This video made me cry. I understand laughing at the misfortunes of others…and to be honest…I often have mixed emotions when cakes and sugar sculptures crash at competitions (sometimes I think it’s sad, sometimes I think it’s funny). But this killed me.
Putting your soul into a piece of art is different than crashing a car into a tree or losing something monetary. It’s different than getting hurt physically. Really, I find it different than a misfortune. I don’t feel the pain of the person crashing their car. I am detached so it is funny. But these men…I feel their pain. So it makes me sad.
If you look closely, the base of the archer’s body if very centrally located. She/he is not laying down at the end, but lifted up with little weight at the corner in question. I am positive that calculations were done with excruciating accuracy. The chance of this crash may have been high, but it was probably less than 50%, meaning that these men felt confident in taking the chance. Also, these blocks of ice aren’t just cut off a glacier around the corner or something. They are made in a painstaking and expensive process to create the ridiculously clear ice. That means these blocks are rare and precious.
This is not a fail. It is inspiration…and sometimes inspiration is trial and error.
Artists are free from the laws of physics?
This is sad :s
Seems to me like everyone went WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY on him lol
He must kill himself with a saw,life fail.
Just LOVE the “aaahhh” fail sound…
Please note the two inbred ignoramuses calling for a “dumb-roll,” instead of a drumroll… in the first part of the video. FAIL!
Did it fall on his head?
Ice Sculpture – Apply directly to the forehead!
Ice Sculpture – Apply directly to the forehead!
Ice Sculpture – Apply directly to the forehead!
Ice Sculpture – Apply directly to the forehead!
Ice Sculpture – Apply directly to the forehead!
sorry, had to do it.
..god…
That is a massive fail.
Gravity wins again!
that made me laugh!
Wheeeeeeeee!!!
Wheeeee! too!!
We’re getting better at this!