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Seems like something for the ICHC people
In soviet russia, wild boar hunts YOU!
In Soviet Russia, the KGB hunt you.
OR
In Soviet Airstrip 1, Big Brother hunts you.
‘1984′ is just fiction! george orwell go to hell!
Of course it’s fiction.
I really think that last sentance was unessessary. Orwell wrote many books that commented cynically on the communist regime in Russia, although he was a Socialist himself. Like Aldous Huxley, he wrote of a dystopia.
Dyspepsia? Ow.
Dysplasia? Ooooh, nasty.
Dysphora. Boo-hoo.
*dysphoria
dysphasia
dysentery
dysphagia
lexdysia? os use em
that’s Mookies field of expertise…
I think I’m the only one that could decipher Admiral’s last sentence. And it was really marts!
Wow, Admiral…you need to be less cryptic. Only one person on the internet could read that.
We’re up to three people (including myself) by my count.
I was being sarcastic, Avis, so I hope I’m included…
*adjusts count to four* Sorry ’bout that. I don’t always read sarcasm correctly.
Don’t worry Avis, sarcasm is hard to detect over the internet for most people.
Also please adjust the count to five as I could read Admiral’s sentence as well…
And it asw reyv ynnfu.
Cnuot em ni!
*tallies new count to… six, it would appear*
Oh ye of little faith. This is failblog. You think only 6 people got that? Add POB, Loz, BFF and several others and I think you can jump straight to 20 right out of the gate.
I don’t get it.
*ducks!*
Oh I know, I’m merely tallying those who weigh in on it. I know this placeisn’t entirely populated by turkeys!
This brings us up to 8, regardless of what Dragon says.
Ok, now see, I wrote a response that did not show up.
I’m only counting the people who weigh in on the topic.
I see we’re up to 8 now, whatever Dragon says.
I do not like this blogmonster.
It is a very nasty blogmonster, Sam-I-Am.
Yes, it is.
Mayhap we should start ritually sacrificing trolls to the blogmonster? Do you think that would appease it?
Not sure if it appease the blogmonster, but it just might do wonders for me!
I must be off to bed now, I get to start baby-sitting at 5(ish) am. Fun.
Blast! I missed being added to the tally by 4 minutes.
*adds coyote*
There you go!
*smooch*
rysor ot pasidipont, tub I nocult’d keam uto hawt teh ladrami dias.
The KISS album Destroyer, what?
dysplasia
*thwacks non-seq*
Dyslexia? Suck really must that.
When I read that I saw: Dyslexia? That must really suck. Not a joke.
Does that mean that I really do have a touch of dyslexia?
who came up with the word lisp and dyslixia they rae real athhh hols
i’ve just wrote a task about ‘1984′, ‘Animal Farm’ and ‘Fahrenheit 451′
from Ray Brandbury. so i’m fed up with dystopian novels.
But 1984 is my favorite.
i like it because of it’s unhappy end.
*borrows Loz’s red pen*
*thwacks klaani with the halibut*
*gives the pen back*
…I just thought the pen gave me more credibility. I didn’t actually want to use it.
So the red pen is like a Talking Stick? The person that holds it is the only one who can whack with the halibut? I kinda like that.
*chuckle* borrows Loz’s red pen* borrow’s Dragon’s halibut* thwacks fluffy* retuns items to owner*
You could have used your brand new fail stamp.
You and every other grade 11 Student in Canada (or possible US)
lawlzasaur
Of course it’s fiction.
Could you imagine living in a world were the superpowers preach fear and worry to the citizens to continue a perpetual war over scarce resources and the general population is constantly watched and every book you read is logged by the government and where people can be pulled off the streets and detained without trial and interrogated simply because of the beliefs they hold or the thoughts they have? That’d be horrible. Glad its fiction.
Now see, this is sarcasm I can recognize!
If you’re going to comment, you should double check your sources sometimes. Most scholars accept that Orwell was commenting (like Alan Moore in V for Vendetta and the Watchmen) on the current state of affairs in his own country, Britain. The title for 1984 was originally 1948 and was supposed to reference the way things were at that moment under the regime that had begun to put a stranglehold on Britain after WWII, in fear of communists and Fascists.
That is the great-grandson of Courage the Cowardly Lion!!!
You’re mixing two pop culture characters together. The “Cowardly Lion” was from the Wizard of Oz, while “Courage the Cowardly Dog” was the main character on a show of the same name, which shows mainly on Cartoon Network. Maybe, though, those two had a baby, which was then named “Courage the Cowardly Lion”, but I wouldn’t trust my guesses solely.
He said himself, 1984 isn`t about the soviets.
No, I agree with klaani.
LAME
don’t be talking shit about Orwell. I’d like to see you write as well as he did about the communists.
‘1984′ wasn’t just about communism in Russia, but what he saw happening to many governments following the Second World War and where he was afraid they were headed to, England and the US included.
And fyi, socialism -isn’t- communism. With socialism the power of the government is still in the hands of the people.
sentence*
See, it’s idiots like klaani which made Eric Arthur Blair use a pen name.
1984 is more important to the past, the present, and the future, than your pretentious defense of Stalinist Russia (or anything else, for that matter).
Совка уже лет 20 как нету, баран.
http://encyclopediadramatica.com/IN_SOVIET_RUSSIA
А люди все ровно помнят…
exactly!
Dont worry dude, they’re too retarted to know the regime is over. And wtf did this have to do with Russia?
I think that means:
“There hasn’t been a Soviet Union in 20 years.”
Close?
Uh…yeah…it’s called a joke, you retard.
and google translate says:
Sovky already 20 years as no, sheep.
I like the ’sheep’ part. Google translator is very baaaaaaaad at translator correctly.
Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.
.
In Soviet Russia, Google translates you!
Уже ближе к 30. Хотя им бесполезно это говорить:))) здорово их СССР напугал. на несколько поколений вперед!
хехехе =)
more like ‘i cn haz pulled pork sammitch’
NO. You can not.
OM NOM NOM NOM
The lion probably couldn’t concentrate with all those annoying sound fx going on.
its not hunting fail, its a boar win
Hakuna Matata!
I miss the wolf, kinda. *pouts*
Me tooooooooooo.
Though not the snarly wolf. I like the dignified wolf.
*smile* thanks
I’m sure I’ll switch back. Lost Boys got stuck in mind the other day while thinking of times past.
What about a pic of you???? You need to keep up with the trend, here!
I’m not very photogenic, and um there are no cameras here! *ooh thats a good one*
Where are you that there are no cameras or access to bacon vodka?
Sure, further down he had the cameras rolling the whole time. Now suddenly he is in a place where there are no cameras…interesting.
I think he’s ashamed of his conjoined twin.
Or his triple butt cheek.
It’s not the cheek, it’s the tattoo that says “I heart Christopher” that he is ashamed of. Don’t ask don’t tell goes right out the window when pictures of that surfaces. Na’mean?
The pictures will probably end up on failblog. And the worst part is I probably won’t have the speed of internet to make “First!”.
Oh, yah.
*LOL* double lol since 2 of my workers are named that *pukes in bukkit* Hope no one needed that anytime soon :S
Im in the sandbox and the other kids havent learned to place nice yet.
.
Re: Avis – really is no vodka allowed
I actually prefer abstract avatars to pictures. It has nothing to do with the photogenic quality of anyone’s face.
Or…hip?
:p
my choice in avatars is a true expression of myself
if that helps
.
and a lovely hip it is .. or asmuch as I can make out in the little 2cm2 pciture
So.. uhhh.. you guys are all starting myspace accounts now?
Yup!
Yes, I here by declare the start of the minimalist failblog-myspace community .. cause its funny Lou, EGG, Mookie and I have all very basic spaces
I haven’t done a whole lot of work on my myspace page either.
For some of us posting a pic here may be a bad idea… our boss might discover what we are doing on our work hours (I have the theory that some bosses gets their training looking at other people fails)
Wow, your boss sounds like an ass. You can come work for me. I’m nice.
Oh, you are very nice. I do not know about litigations or even using proper Engrish, but I am very dutiful and never waste the time on Internet.
[ actually my boss is fine, he is based on another country and I only see him once in a month ]
Before accepting your offer, I must ask… does punishment for being late at work include spanking?
Great! Send me your resume. Oh – and your credit card number.
Last time I checked my credit card had been stolen on the Internet.
I am waiting for the poice to find it and take it back for me
No doubt it was stolen when you checked to see if it was stolen.
You know, you put in your credit card number and when it expires… then all of a sudden *poof* your card got jacked.
Oh man, any of you guys could have put that so much more eloquently than me… I feel bad now
*more eloquently than I*
See what I mean…
My boss sits here with me and laughs at the pictures.
I have an awesome job : )
Lucky you!
My boss tends to besiege me every time he can.
I think hes geting ready to assault the sally port again … *oh no offense and s too late and I can’t resist the bad ones this late*
There is something about having your sally port assaulted that sounds so sexy.
Care for a disembark?
I’d put on a pic of me, but the Surgeon General has deemed it a hazardous material.
i don’t think he needs a pick of himself…
well, at least i dont
Pumbaa Wins!
Pumbaa, no!
And on a somewhat unrelated note…
*kicks self for not recognizing “Circle of Life” moment the other day when Sara J held up the newborn bun bun for us to see*
first!
First person here to say “first” you mean I’m sure….
Why the hell does nobody ever post normal comments about the fail?
ok there are 666 comments so i feel like i should say something to make this more holy.
First!!
…In other new, Hank has been arrested on charges of saying ‘f*rst’.
does someone have break of dawn at the moment so that we can hang him?
Whoa there sharkee, let’s not jump ahead.
*ahem*
HANK! On the allegations of claiming first when by fail book law, chapter 35, section 7, article 23 purely states “One shall not claim, say, sign, whisper, or type first unless thee has honestly posted “first”. Updated Clause A: Regardless of position in topic, posting the word “first” by itself may result in ridicule from other members and an increase of self despair.”
How do you plea?
Clearly he gave the right to be silent.
I plead the fifth! I swear it was only a fifth of jack officer… oh you weren’t talkng to me .. um nvm then…
That might fall under the category of “excited utterance”.
I watch waaaaaaaaay too much Law & Order. In almost all of it’s permutations.
Doink Doink
*harbors a very large crush on Detective Goren*
I cannot explain it, I don’t understand it myself.
Right there with ya, Avis.
It’s the smarts. It’s always the smarts.
I think it might have a bit to do with his intensity. But it definitely has much to do with the smarts.
He has that really smart cuddly teddy bear that will rip someone’s head off verbally in a much more painful way than any punch could hurt look to him. He had me at the Edgar suit in MIB.
*snork*
I forgot about the Egger-suit. That was awesome.
The funny thing is, the woman that plays his wife and is sent shopping *damn girl, just damn* is on Criminal Intent often enough to notice.
I love the one where he dances up to the house and drops papers through the mail slot on the front door while singing “SEARCH warrant!!!”
Sorry for being overhasty. You’re right. He should get a fair chance of an unfair trial. Can I testify?
only if I can get an amen!
*hands over bucket of amen*
*Hands over bucket of a man*
*looks in bucket* Emy, I thought they only shredded privates at the shop down the street, not the whole man…
I do, I just got off of work, so I’m totally free. Does 7 a.m. central work for you guys?
Lynch mob! LYNCH MOB!
He said First!!! Stone Him!!
Classic First-Fail.
That lioness is boared.
her predator credibility is heading sowth
I bet she went straight home, swine-ing all about her horrible experiences.
That’s certainly snout how you win friends and influence people.
She just didn’t feel like pigging out.
Well, she had already been porked by her mate, so why over-do it?
She’ll get criticised for not bringing home the bacon.
She’ll be lion about that to her family.
No, she’ll just ham it up by telling a story of a warthog the size of an elephant.
Tusk, tusk, tusk…
She’ll get criticised for not bringing home the bacon.
Double your pleasure, double your fun!
I. . .did. . .that on purpose. Honest.
It’s. . . . .an offering to the fail gods.
By failing this obviously here they let me get away with other fails elsewhere that slip by un-noticed.
Oh, very nice!
Total hooey…but nice.
Nice hooey… it sounds provacative!
That’s her hoo-hah you might be thinking of.
Ryannon, what you do, girl?
I am a marketing and data analyst. I help struggling grocery chains compete against the giants by telling them what they are doing wrong and what to do right.
“Sowth”? Spelling fail!
joke-understanding fail
Comprehension fail. They’re on a Fun Pun-Run! Watch in amazement.
No you idiot! That was obviously a play on words. A sow is an adult female pig. Thus “sowth”. Go back to school before attempting to mingle with the wit here which is evidently far beyond your IQ level.
cluster-recognition fail… poor lad…
or pun recognition fail?
Punderstanding fail!
You lose the Internet.
sow-th = sow: another name for a pig. I am pretty sure the name is for female pigs, but I am not so sure if it applies only to pigs which have a had progeny or some other status.
Pun comprehension fail.
misunderstanding of pun fail!
fail. Dude. Sow = female pig? They were all making pig puns?…
Punderstanding fail
Retardedness win!
hilarity awareness fail overturns spelling fail
Look up sow n00b
This is one of the best flogging threads so far! I will be surprised if he returns. I have never seen such derisions and scorn heaped upon a fail, as the outpouring of flame this has generated.
Ha! I was just thinking the same thing!
Just goes to show…don’t mess with the pun-runs!
And most of the “heapers” I’ve never even seen before! Interesting, it would appear to be troll on troll action.
Oh, I wouldn’t call them trolls, Avis. They are, after all, defending the pun-runners!
I’ll give you that, shall we call them lurkers instead?
I do not believe they were trolls. They seem to be organized. Squirrellybob do you have something to tell us?
Are We being watched?
Skwerlly Bob! Sorry! *should check names before posting*
I think they are Egg’s minions of whom he speaks so highly.
Love the new look Ryannon!
I have no minions!
I offered myself as a minion once…or twice (Sorry, no pictures available).
I do, however, have this nice video of the event for sale! Just email me your credit card number and I will be happy to send one to you.
There’s a video? Damn those sailors, they lied to me!!
Cute Outfit Egg! You’re getting quite creative! There must be an EGG site somewhere on the intertubes.
Squwerlly, I tried to IM you, but I think I mighta screwed up!
Lol that is great and it did continue and I aggree with Dragon, it looks like all the lurkers burst forth to hurdle derision upon his head and turn it into a punishment thread.
Either pun detection fail, or troll win. I’m not sure which.
Not getting it FAIL!
Heeheeheeheeheeheeheehee!!!
Moron.
Recognition of pun fail!
Pun-recognition fail!
Punderstanding fail!
Pun-spotting fail
Um, following the line of the joke fail!
(a sow is a female pig)
Following the lion of the joke?
Um, no.
Sow= term for pig
Ergo, pun.
Ergo, you fail.
Recognition of a pun fail.
Play on words recognition fail!
Failure to understand the pun FAIL.
lol
Understanding puns fail.
You’ve now run the pun gauntlet! I’d make a pun for it if I were you.
They were making a play on words, a sow is another word for a female swine.
perception fail…
Understanding the intentional misspelling fail.
Longest burn in the history of failblog WIN!!
That was a pun, genius.
Spelling pun-getting fail.
Stratholm
November 24th, 2008 at 10:23 am
“Sowth”? Spelling fail!
It appears someone is having a Pun-derstanding fail
You should know by now that Failers just want to have pun.
understanding fail
Not getting the joke fail…
Sow = female pig
Porcine-related pun understanding FAIL.
Understanding puns fail.
See… what they did there was use a clever spelling of ’south’ incorporating the noun “sow” into the word. Sow of course is an adult female pig.
Pun recognition fail!
Are you being deliberately obtuse?
Pun recognition fail
“sow”… as in pig? warthog? get it? SOWth????
understanding puns fail.
Pun comprehension fail.
Unable to spot a pun fail!
It’s a play on words. A sow is a female pig.
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_a_female_pig_called_a_sow
a “sow” is a female swine, they were making a play on words.
you, my friend, have a humor FAIL
Yes “sowth” – Pun recognition fail.
Reading comprehension fail!
Getting-the-joke fail actually…
“Spelling fail”? Humor fail.
> “Sowth”? Spelling fail!” =)<
COMPREHENSION FAIL!!!
__________________________________
sow
–noun
1. an adult female swine.
__________________________________
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sow
Stratholm-
understanding joke fail
pun-recognizing fail?
Fail-identifying fail.
Comprehension fail.
criticism fail.
No. It’s a pun. A sow is a female pig. Sowth=South.
Her playmate is pignacious.
Maybe he just wanted to barrow a cup of sugar and she refused.
He gave her the shoat end of the stick.
Tusk, tusk. I have to kosher all these puns with my coworkers.
He wanted to give her razorback, but she told him to keep it.
She should be careful, anyway, or she’ll end up a little potbellied.
If she did, she could ham it up at the opera
This is looking like the baconing of the end here.
Less BBQ, more pew pew
No, you just have low exporctations.
maybe the lioness had just gone to market…?
She’s going to have to admit her gilt at some point, though.
She was just trying to sow some wild oats.
Oh lard, I just love doing that!
Yes, but the morning after can be a-boar-ent.
The best trichinosis for that is lots of water and Advil.
I think she just wanted a piggy-back ride!
It can get lonely in the savannah, maybe she needed a hog
I can see Georgia from my house!
Can you? Are there tanks?
I don’t see any…
I saw some shermans go through a while back…
Does the septic tank count?
Sus! You’re going to scare them!
That pig really went the whole hog…
I think he’s gonna pork her…
If he does she’ll be lion about the father of her hybrid litter later.
Or maybe if he knocks her up she’ll a-boar-t (Oh, even I found that in bad taste)
She’s having trouble catching and eating warthogs, why not try cub sandwiches.
Her hunting trip was a CATastrophe!
*paws for applause*
She’ll just have to wallow in shame over losing dinner, the pig was the mane dish.
Okay I think I have all the puns out of my system, now.
Or Pig Win!
Wow, this post is going to annoy the under 10s in here!
aww crap
That neatly summarises your two comments.
that’s funny
What do you mean funny, funny how? funny like I’m a clown?
Down, Pesto!
Goodfeathers, ftw!
Spider, get me a drinky!
wtf
I guess the level of “fail” depends on who you’re rooting for.
The lioness must have been lion around instead of practicing her hunting skills.
can we relion that?
well, she can’t seem to CATch her prey
what a pussy…
U suck… stealing jokes from The Lion King
KH2 is calling. they want your obsession back
You suck… using “u” instead of “you”.
You’re not paying per letter here, pal, you can use proper grammar.
Someone has to use up all the spare ‘u’s the Americans keep dropping, he should be applauded for recycling.
Hey, we have a reason to drop the ‘u’s! It’s for all of those illiterate children, so they have less to write!
*URGENT AND JUST QUITE POSSIBLY OBVIOUS NOTICE* “No Child Left Behind” did, in fact, leave children behind. Redundant? Not so much. Bush FAIL!
Stealing a joke is better than no joke at all, ask Carlos Mencia.
Oh, that was defiantly a burn!
I even felt the heat from here…
why not?
FIRST!
sorry…I meant FOURTH!
Because you’re 4th?
Kamokazi, the correct Japanese for your name is Kamikaze, or 神風
lol!
Why was that funny?
Because your phoarth?
kamehamehahahahahahahahahaha.
heh, personal thing I guess.
I wish more people knew more about foreign cultures. I mean, if you’re going to take a foreign word as your name, the very least you could do is learn how to spell it.
Yea, uncultured people should just commit harey carey (腹切り).
Erm…hari-kari?
lol!
.
See? there is goes again
Kamikaze means “divine wind” so is that a God fart or something?
Maybe this conversation should move down the hall to Engrish?
It’s not “because”, it’s “why”
do you speak spanish right?
Kamokazi is correct. The question was “why”, the answer is “because”.
Do you speak English right?
Maybe he is a kamikaze in hiding.
Camokaze?
No thank you, I don’t drink.
No thanks, I’m baptist.
This is absurd.
Camuskazi?
No thanks, I’m overcome by Nausea.
*ungulates with joy*
Camelkaze.
(psst. I moved the couch…)
Kamoflaarrrj!
Bless you!
well this is weird
Haha. That pig doesn’t want to be eaten and he’s letting the lion know how he feels.
I wonder if being eaten is as bad as being drunk.
Ask a glass of water
Water wouldn’t know what it was like to be eaten though…unless its ice
Or frozen. Because there’s a difference.
No, but water does know how to be drunk!
you can use it the same way though!
Hitchhiker’s Guide Win!
Also referencing another Failblog picture win!
Or haven’t the Ice Fail picture?
HHGTG ref win!
Drink water – Drunk tank
I’ve experienced both and being eaten is definitely better.
Ahahaha !! FAIL !!
A fail? On the failblog? Surely not!
I’m absoultely shocked! Did you know the Pope’s Catholic as well? Catholic, I tell you!
Noooo, say it ain’t so!
I know! Its scandulous!
I’ve heard that the US is governed by a president! Can you believe that? A president, of all things!
Not until January 2009. We had an 8 year hiatus BF.
Not always, the last eight years we’ve had a dicktator.
*snork*
And I’ve seen this aaawesome documentary about bears and their faecal habits. You wouldn’t believe it!
Way to jump the shark(ee).
Do ursine mammals evacuate their bowels in sylvan environments?
It is better to be violent, if there is violence in our hearts, than to put on the cloak of non-violence to cover impotence.
you aint lion
I’m Gandhi hug you for that one…
*hug*
Mahatma’s off to you for that pun!
Well, ahimsa my hero…to pun is to honor!
That commend indira’ed you to me!
Aw, now I feel like a caste-off for not being commended as well!
You Budda believe that we’re proud of you for that one.
Nehru or far, wherever you are, we will always be proud of you.
This Confucious me…
Gupta get with the program…
You Budda believe we’re proud of you for that one!
Primero!1eleven :-/
are you trying to be funny or can you not see how many posts came before yours? Either way, I’d call it a fail. Don’t worry though, everyone fails sometimes.
It was just Pumbaa’s turn to win. Simba could totally kick his a** if he wanted to.
Eh, that’s just the circle of life for ya.
except that’s a girl and simba is a boy…
Maybe s/he had that operation … it’s been some time since we saw Simba last…
Maybe it was Nala or Sarabi or Kiara… all of those are female lions who appear in the Lion King movie and it’s sequel.
I was going to add Sarafina’s name to the list but I thought you all would think I was nerdy for knowing Nala’s mother’s name even though it’s never mentioned in the movie…
There a fail in this post but I can’t decide where or what kind….
The thought of a “post-op” Simba is kind of creepy…
Repeated first fail?
hehe .. sooooo fuuuny
hoho .. reaaaallllyy???
haha .. iiiii woooouudn’t knooooow.
hehe .. weeee sooouuund liiike weee’ree hiiigh.
there are 2 words that can describe this video… the one is “LOL” and the other one “FAIL”… “epic fail” and “ROFL” may be used as well…
what about “BRB” and “ASL?”
or SCUBA?
du DUUUU da dudu~
roflmao
du du DAH du
roflmao!
du DUUUU da dudu, dah dudu, dah dudu, dah dudu dah duddle dududuDAHdu
Either that lion is really young, or that warthog is ballsy.
That pussy got licked.
I suddenly need a cold shower.
It’s this blog. I brings out the animal in me.
“I brings out the animal in me.”
I think that’s more towards the truth, there, Mookie!
Gotta love those Freudian slips.
I wear them all the time.
Do you like my Freudian corset?
*poses*
I thought the paper clips were a particularly nice touch.
What’s this string here? *pulls* oops! Sorry!!!
*stares*
Yikes! *covers BF’s eyes* Quick, Dragon, cover yourself!
Waah! Who turned out the lights?!
You already covered BF’s eyes! Does she really have
to cover herself as well?
As a safety precaution.
Why is it I end up half-naked on these threads so often??
*puts on a bathrobe and the Admiral’s “peal” socks with the bells on them*
Um, Mookie, you can take your hands off my eyes now.
Mookie?
Helllooooo?
Huh, wha? Must’ve had some of that soup…
Don’t worry the cameras have recorded everything to make sure no crime was committed. We can review the tapes later.
Yeah, non-seq’s been handing it out on another thread, I think.
*peeks in*
Lets see, three woman an egg and a 14yr old.
I’m outta here.
*flees*
Fair weather friend!
*sticks out a leg and trips Blue2th*
Hey! Why did you do tha…….nice legs!
*quietly sitting in the corner taking notes*
*thinks: [how in the world did these humans make it this far?]*
*finds Dragon in the dark because of bell socks*
*knows it’s the Admiral by sense of touch*
I don’t shrink when I see that Freudian corset.
Off topic. Since this site doesn’t allow PM-ing, I’ve set up a very rudimentary myspace page because I know you’re all burning to share your secrets. And I never tell secrets.
On the bad side, I’ve had to remove the fried egg you used to see when clicking my name.
Here’s hoping this works!
Well, perhaps I should lay down on this couch here, and you can help me with one of my more pressing problems…
Ooohhh, your minimalistic state-of-the-art fried egg blog is lost.
But on th ebright side, now I know where to send these word document you were asking me for
I like to keep my hands free so they can roam.
*uses teeth*
You missed one.
*breathes deeeeeply*
OK, Lou, I’ll be waiting…..
For Christ’s sake, Dragon and Admiral… I’m climbing the walls here, now. Thanks a bunch.
I like saving that one for last.
*zzhiiing*
Most definitely our pleasure.
*grin*
*hears the small tinkling of bells as the “peal” socks go
flying across the room*
Hm…I think your particular brand of therapy is working, Admiral. I’m baring my…erm…soul to you now.
Geez, I’m feeling left out. Lou, wanna have cyber-sex?
*disclaimer* Offer only applies if you are over 21.
*exasperated look*
FINE! We’ll move off your Myspace thread to a different thread. Just stop with the “seductus interruptus”!
:p
Ahhhh hell looks like another cold shower night …
*goes to off to check out Mookie*
Just a minute, EB, who’s checking out whom?? I thought it was my turn to be the doctor???
Mookie, I wonder how did you read my word document before I had the chance to finish it.
So you already know the answer! (and yes, I am over 21)
But I brought this nurse’s outfit for you try on
.
on another note see if that linky works and I put up a pic of me on my bike.
Back from dinner!
So, what’s up? *reads* Cyber-sex..? Nurse out…fit…?
*covers eyes*
*thinks*
*uncovers eyes*
Omigod! ErickB, you’re…you’re…you’re…a cartoon!!!! Sigh. You seemed almost human…
So. . .we have tossed the innuendo machine out and everyone is just having at it?
No, we upgraded! Meet the “Innuendo 3000″ (tm thingie)™!
It has lots of new features, and it goes to eleven.
*eyes the new machine, noting that smoke is beginning to rise from it*
Okay. *Picks up club and goes in search of dinner.* TTFN
who is the 14 year old, Blue2th?
Our trust and respected friend, BondFan, is 14. Believe it. Or not.
He’s 14 and is capable of burns on great proportion.
Of!! Of great proportion!!
*sigh*
Whose great proportions is he burning? I heard some sizzling between him and cicili …
Avis, I think you should tell us all who this “Great Proportion” guy is. I need to give him a talking-to.
what about Freudian stages of development? I’m in the genital stage myself.
Watch out admiral, I tend to get violent when people bring up my impotence!
Watch out, Rob, I tend to reduce to ash anyone who threatens violence towards my Admiral.
Watch out, Dragonwriter, I tend to reduce to high-energy gamma radiation anyone who threatens violence towards rob.
“let’s get ready to rumble!”… “FIGHT!”
Be careful with that phrase. The Buffer Bros. tend to sue. They trademarked it.
*takes back*.. there was no fight anyway
Watch out, Erm., I tend to launch a nuclear missile at anyone who threatens any member of FailMENSA.
Watch out BondFan4518, i tend to get very close to watch people suffer and i don’t want to get stained with the nuclear powder remains of Erm. or rob’s ashes…
Watch out, EGG, the missile is getting very near, so get in the nuclear bunker with me.
Watch out….for that bus…..too late.
Can I be a part of FailMENSA? I’m just a pretty kitty looking for an itty bitty piece of… food, and FailMENSA is like wet tuna to me. I just can’t stay away.
Watch out, BondFan, I may have turned your nuclear bunker into a disco.
*dances*
*raves*
Watch out, k-k-k-katy, theres a fire in the disco- a disco inferno. You best be dancing or get the heck outta there!
Don’t worry. The DJ will save her live…
k-k-k-katy!!! Thanks for inviting me to be your fwiend on myspace. You’re my first one! (I’m such a rube where myspace is concerned). But now I can messages from all you fun people!
You accidenty your myspace, Mookie!
No getty, Dragon. Duh…
Yay! I love Myspace. If you get a chance, you’re welcome to read my blogs. Most of them are inane, but every now and then you’ll find a truly funny one.
CRACK his shell, BFF! Or, we can soft boil him, have him scrambled or, serve him up in an omelete. Mmm, hand over the butter, the cream, What fillings should we utilise?Some neener neener neener, some sharkee, some erm, some rob. And we shall bind it with the best cheese, Dragonslayer cheese.
Pound-for-pound warthogs are the feistiest mammals.
I see your warthog and raise you a tazmanian devil
What about a straight up feist?
FEIST!
…Oh, wait…
I have a slightly used feist here…minimal stains.
…Okay, that was terrible, and I am ashamed.
*hangs head*
Alright, Dragon, bend over for your punishment…
Must…resist…set-up….
*fails*
B3nd 0ver and I’ll show you punishment!
but it made me chuckle! Don’t be abashed!
Hrm…
That’d be a great fight, warthog vs Tasmanian devil.
I think I’d bet on the pig.
Some Pig!
That brings back memories of reading to my girls.
Uhhh…. What??? That was a very disturbing comment, Marius…
I always hated Charlotte’s Web. I think the spider wigged me out too much.
Arachnophobia Ryannon? My younger daughter has it. I wonder if it was the book?
And Fluffy,
Charlotte’s Web is a classic!!
No worries Fluffy. The comment does appear off without mentioning the book title.
i cried.
Pound-for-pound, I’ll go with a badger.
I’d go with a shrew, on a pound for pound basis.
Or a wolverine.
Or a snipe they’re very shifty.
I’d pick a badger, mostly because I was, in fact, chased by one while I was riding a horse…and I’ve seen footage of one successfully fighting off two wolves and taking their kill from them.
In a sexy way?
No no no!! Not the badger badger badger!
Pound-for pound, I’d be wondering why I suddenly had British currency.
I’ll see your tasmanian devil and raise you a badger.
That lion must be from Detroit.
What’s that supposed to mean?
*hands RandomAct a newspaper*
Oh my god!!!!! My team sucks THAT badly?
*moves to Boston*
Ack! I can’t believe I missed such a simple reference, I guess I just wanted to repress all thoughts of my poor, poor team. I don’t even have Michigan football to fall back on…
BTW, sorry if a similar comment appears, I’ve been having trouble with my posts not coming up on-screen.
It’s been doing that to me, too. I lost about eight posts yesterday.
Grrrrrrrrrr…!
Hang on, before you go any further, I’d like to bring to your attention this pressing matter.
*squeezes dragonwriter*
*sets sail for the isle of the hattifatteners*
I’ll give them barometer.
Detroit has a large community of Muslim lions
Well struck, rob, well struck.
It means, in the future, when NFL shows are talking about winless teams, they won’t just be comparing them to the Bucs team back in the 70s.
that hog has balls !!
Or a vagina.
He should get some nitroglycerin for that. Just in case.
*explodes in ball of flame*
Maybe both?
It’s hog fail, the lioness is just playing. He’s lucky she doesn’t give a shit. If I was him, I’d run away before she remembers she’s hungry.
Or does it smell so badly that she lost her urge to feed?
What was she looking at?
What was who looking at?
Your mom O.o
What about my mum?
(Note – Civilised spelling)
What about my mun?
(Note – civilised spelling)
Apparently it is civilized to repeat everything twice.
Quite, quite.
Only on failblog…. or a Monty Python skit…
Good evening… Tonight on ‘It’s The Mind’ we examine the phenomenon of Deja-vu.
Good evening… Tonight on ‘It’s The Mind’ we examine the phenomenon of Deja-vu.
Good evening… Tonight on ‘It’s The Mind’ we examine the phenomenon of Deja-vu.
Just a test, if you can see this, please reply.
*waves*
T or F, multiple choice, or essay?
I didn’t study!!
*has a cheat sheet*
*peeks at Avis’ paper*
I saw what you did there…
*reply*
“It’s the Mind!”
Hear hear
*draws some ear holes on EGG*
*Puts Mr. Potato Head glasses on EGG*
*draws little mustache on EGG*
*puts a frilly pink dress and ballet slippers on Egg*
Looks like he’s ready for the prom.
He’s gonna be mad when he looks in the mirror in the morning *eep*
You never can tell. He might just start singing “I Feel Pretty”.
*yawns*
Now that was some fiiiine nap… wait, who…what..?
What’s this on my face??
Ngah!! I knew Mookie was tricking me with this avatar!!
I’m er…Mr Potato… ballerina Hitler collector’s edition?!
Not funny…
Aw, EGG, you will always be cute!
EGG, you gave me a good chuckle with that collector’s edition.
At least my price has increased. I might be able to sell my body at last!!
*Sings*
I feel pretty,
Oh so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and gaaaay!
And I pity
any girl who isn’t me today
*Snicker*
It may be civilized to say things twice,
But it’s comedy to say things thrice.
Such as ‘I say, I say, I say,
A funny thing happened while I was on my way.
I messed up all the syllables,
And the last line didn’t rhyme.
The end.
I was wondering the same thing, like someone or something was distracting her, maybe she’s not totally wild and learning how to hunt? Millions of possibilities I suppose, lol.
Pig Fail
But truly, does the pig ever win?
When it comes to breakfast, the pig is committed, the chicken is only involved.
I’ve got your hakuna matata right here…
I’m suspecting a very young lion who bit off more than he could chew. And I do mean he. No mane means it’s not an adult male–not necessarily a female. This looks like the work of a teenage boy.
Shouldn’t this be over on LOLCATS?
Clearly the lion is on the hunt for something else and this pig is interfering.
Right, ‘where’s the caviar?’
That lion is a pussy.
Good evening… Tonight on ‘It’s The Mind’ we examine the phenomenon of Deja-vu.
One of THE best skits with Monty Python.
I love how the hog backed up to charge again.
Ramming speed!
you men are soo all alike. lol
You know, unless I’m very badly mistaken, this was ripped straight out of the movie “Born Free”. The whole point of the scene is that Elsa, the lioness, doesn’t understand the concept of hunting because she was raised in captivity.
Fail fail.
For the love of Pete, stop raining on my parade!
Aww…poor Mookie…
*covers Mookie with an umbrella* We’ll just wait it out until these trolls go away.
They NEVER go away…! They just keep coming back.
*sobs!*
What, is your FOOOOM broken?
No, but it’s such a shame to waste it on such paltry trolls. They’re not really deserving of the attention.
I like saving my *FOOOOOM!!s for the real ugly ones.
True. For trolls like such, the attention of a FOOOOM ™ would only make them stronger.
Oooh! My *FOOOOM!!* has been trademarked (tm thingie)™!!
Dragon, you would make a fortune if you bottled it. Bolg partisans would buy it by the truck load. Would have made the above burning session spectacular!
What a mess. Would, would, would. Ugh!
*pats Marius*
It’s okay…you’re just in a very subjunctive mood tonight.
I have tears coming out of my eyes from laughing for the last ten minutes. You hit the mark on that comment Dragon. My sister-in-law has been staying with us for the last six months hiding from her now ex husband. Needless to say private time is at a premium. It all makes sense now.
See why we need a rule?
*nods in an ‘I-told-you-so’ kinda way*
For an egg, you are very wise.
He is an egghead, after all.
It’s not your parade. Quit whining.
I believe this is, in fact, Mookie’s parade. The Troll parade is over there, right on that squirrel’s habitat.
I don’t think so. There are too many people wearing clothes in this parade to truely be a Mookie social.
Wait, no one said anything about clothes.
It’s my birthday, should I put on my suit?
I have a birthday this Thursday.
You should probably give it back to the person it belongs to. They’re likely wondering where it went.
Belonged to my elder b{r}other, he wanted to trade me for a tonka truck, he was 2, I was new.
Should have chosen the Tonka truck.
(Oh, gawd, I’m glad someone said it so I wouldn’t have to…!)
Oh, my, the cruelometer ratings just went thru the roof!
ahh be kind to cicili, my favorite non-seqt.
It’s not your wine. Quit parading.
Who’s Pete? And why is he raining on Mookie’s parade? And is it really rain?
Only love
Can bring the rain
That makes you yearn to the sky.
Only love
Can bring the rain
That falls like tears from on high.
In the rain, the pavement shines like silver….
As the sky came pourin’ down
I laid down on the ground
Like I was dreamin’
I let the feelin’ wash all over me
Rain, rain love.
LOL, I think Admiral’s hot fer teacher!
Who?
Don’t play dumb with me, missy!
Um…t’was a joke. The Admiral’s lyrics…the band…the…the…
*droops*
My pun…it failed.
Nah, it didn’t. And the answer to your original
question is (of course): …
.
(wait for it…)
.
“He’s on first”.
Wait a minute, who’s Pete, and why should I love him?
Well that would explain the music…
But Kanchou is right!! It *is* Elsa from Born Free.
But Elsa still failed. hehe.
I have REALLY got to get to work on that troll and flamer filter for web browsers…
Wow, that movie was a 60’s film, unlike the 60’s film on all the wildlifes teeth!
btw, Kanchou, I like your screenname, lol
See it’s no fun if you explain the fail.
Oh geez…1972 melodrama movie fail. I accuse Failblog.
YES! I thought that as soon as I saw it, but I wasn’t sure because I haven’t seen that film since I was little.
it’s a warthog, not a pig.
duh
A warthog is a kind of pig.
It’s a female. It is actually Elsa, who was raised by humans and this was one of their first attempts at rehabilitating her into the wild. She did not know how to hunt at this point, this clip is from the film ‘Born Free’, which documents her life with humans and subsequent rehabilitation.
(Yes I know it’s actually Girl, not Elsa, but she was playing Elsa for the benefit of the cameras, since Elsa was unable to star as herself due to the minor inconvenience of being dead).
Still, with a good agent, she coulda got some sort of supporting role or cameo appearance…
Obviously ’shopped.
*shops Krall the deceiver into video* Well, whaddaya know! The lioness knows how to maul things after all! *munches popcorn*
Pulls out Popcorn Eraser just in case.
*sharpens popcorn eraser, just in case*
We’ve gotta film this and sell it as “par-per-view!”
They call me… MISTER PIG!!!
Spider Pig, Spider Pig…
“Call him Mister Pig, call him Mister Hog; call him Mister Vain..” *sings*
Let me come in!
Not by the hair of my chinny chin chin.
You should wax that.
…does whatever a Spider Pig does. Can he swing from a web? No he can’t, he’s a pig. Look out, here comes the Spider Pig!
Epic reference win.
Awwww looks like Pumba & Simba playing… where is Timon???
yeeey for pumba!
Whatever the distraction is, it’s more important than pork.
And on another note .. this is the first video fail I have been able to watch since i have been posting on here! yay for personal internet!
*oh my secret shame*
I thought your secret shame was your conjoined twin? Now I’m confused.
Wait, so who has that “I heart Christopher” tattoo?
*cough*don’t ask don’t tell*cough*
Now I guess I will have to post photos of my bare bum to show its tattoo-less.
Well…if you MUST.
And don’t go convincing some other guy to sit on the Xerox machine instead of you… we want the wolfie bum!
I’ll claim photoshop.
Looks like we’re out of bacon.
Food chain: Ur doin’ it rong!
Lulz.
C*cked-blocked by dinner x]
Warthog WIN!!!
Eeeeek! Brave lion inc!
I wish I could superimpose the “Dr. Zoidberg” sound effects on this video for every time that boar charges.
Ohhhhhh, that would be cool.
Woopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoopwoop *thud* miaow
Its not a fail its just a smart animal
Its like… the pig wants to be eaten…
Pig: Eat me!
Lion: Wtf, go away! I said I’m not hungry!
and thats what happens when you declaw a lion
That’s no ordinary chopped bar-b-q, THAT’S PORKULES!!!
Spamticas!
lol what a retarded lion
Bacon, is there anything it can’t do?
Suicidal boar fail.
It should have run towards the mouth to get inside the belly of the lion.
Fail lion is fail.
FAIL!!!
This blog seems to be incoherence: it isn’t a failure!! it’s a very good blog!
Hakuna Matata win
Frady cat!!!!
You know, that’s actually a bit sad, I think.
the pimp has become the bitch
actually who is the hunter dis time…??
You might wonder, but if they’re not hungry, sick, or tired, they are far less badass. Just like with most animals, they just go their way, if you respect them and act according to their character.
Yeah, because that porker was showing the utmost respect to that lion.
Agreed. Most people believe that all carnivorous animals will try to eat everything that moves because that is what hollywood has taught them. But the truth is, they only eat when they are hungry and CAN be scared/intimidated or fought off just like any other animal.
LOL…I never thought boars are that tough!
These are the funny outtakes of the Lion King. If you watch the end credits, you have seen them already!
You lose.
Hahaha Pumba kicked Nala’s ass!
Is anybody else thinking of World of Warcraft when it comes to this video?
lol you are right
This clip is from the movie “Born Free” and it’s about a lion that was orphaned and raised by two folks who lived in Kenya. They realized she would either have to go to a zoo or be released due to her mischievous nature, so they would take her out into the plains and try to teach her to hunt. This is a scene where they think she actually is going to be successful, but she doesn’t know what to do with it when she catches it! Her name is Elsa. It’s an old school movie, but it’s great!
That isn’t a boar…it’s Chuck Norris in disguise.
Pumbaa and Nala are fighting again.
I think it’s a Jewish lion. Just trying to keep kosher.
Win.
Perhaps Dick Cheney was there assisting the lioness. She’ll have a fun time explaining that one to the cubs.
LYON say: THIS is madness!
BOAR say:THIS IS AFRICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
NOT FIRST!!!
And was anyone else reminded of Simba and Pumba from the Lion King movies?
I guess you’re not going to be bakin’ bacon with Macon tonight.
or Makin’ Bacon either
I always root for the underhog.
The poor bloody lion was spooked and distracted by the people following it with the camera!
Wow i think that lion has ADD
This video is a fake!
Boar:”I ain’t going out like that!”
Lion: “Screw it. It’s not worth it.”
hahaha!
lo freeking l
that lion was like, look at this thing. i know he did not just hit me
This is a clip from the movie Born Free.
Epic pwnage!
Pumbaa is such a jerk!
Poor Nala was left aching from the bacon.
that lioness got OWNED
that loin just got OWN3D!!!!
They call me MR. PIG!
Run little kitty cat, run
Не ну ебать копать
Cool video i mean
this is not surprising at all. why would simba eat pumba?
This blog should have been called “Simba and Pumba Fail” or “The Lion King Fail” Does anyone agree with me?
LION KINGGGG!!!!
PUMBA AND SIMBAAAAAAAAA
seems like that lion had better things on its mind lol
Lol what a pathetic failure of a lion hahahahahahahahahaha
That was the point of the movie — an animal raised in captivity cannot survive in the wild.
PUMBA WINS!
simba just got pwned! xD
i think this should be named “warthog epic win”
PWNED
This is from the movie “Born Free,” which was made in the 1960s. This would’ve been funnier had it been recent. FAIL.
LOL this is good.