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Cheezburger Network Blog
Decisions, decisions…
FIRST!!!!!!!
reply
I demonstrated that trick to be first worked. That should boost its price
I will give you 100,000 Dinar!
And the auction just began.
Of course, money is not the most important thing or only means of payment; and for ethical reasons I cannot sell the trick to anybody with “First” posts in their criminal record.
I bid one round trip through the Time-Space Continuum.
So anybody can stop himself from posting “First”? You shouldn’t bid it, you should auction it!
Does the criminal record of first’s apply to the sister sites? I regretably firsted on I has a hotdog, but I don’t want to be omitted from the auction.
If, however, I can still partake, I bid 100,001 Dinar! (ErickB, I watch The Price Is Right. I know how it’s done.)
BTW, how do you get the italics and bolded thingys in here? Yes, I am well aware I just said “thingys”. I love my thingys. ….Well, maybe not THAT way.
Well start by concentrating really hard on your thingys…
You’re saying that because you don’t have one.
Someone posted this on a previous fail, I’m too tired to go back and look it up.
But I believe they said you have to use “I”word”/I” replacing the quotes with the ‘greater’ and ‘lesser’ symbols and you replace the I with B for bold face…I hope this is right and help
test
test
Handy dandy, crow dude. That should keep emygirl busy for a while…
Wait, let me try it. This is very confusing!
>I>emygirl</IB>emygirl</B<
>IemygirlBemygirl</B
DAMMIT!
Try flipping the first symbol, then only putting I or B after the / if you want italics or bold, then placing another “left pointing” symbol in front of the second word, then flipping the last symbol
Ok, wait one second…
emygirl
I am actually impressed you got the < and the > symbols to show up in your post ….
This is too funny!
TMI I’m actually impressed you couldn’t read further down the page to see that I had already realized that fact and stated as such.
Re: flighty crow – And I’m not impressed that you took offense to a comment that was not directed at you, as you obviously didn’t take the time to read my comment or understand it. I was referring to emygirl’s comment where the > / < signs actually are displayed. Whereas none of your comments above here show the symbol.
.
And excuse me for not reading the whole page to make sure you haven’t posted something related to a comment which I choose to comment on. If you have trouble understanding this comment IS directed at your comment which was improperly directed at my comment which was not directed at you, nor was it a slight in any way. Now, eat crow or simply say “I see where I mis-read, my apologies.”
I see where I mis-read, my apologies.
*smile* Apology accepted! *offers Crow a Guinness*
*Gladly accepts Guinness*
Have some cake, some fool just walked forever for it.
Does this work
WOO! Pint o’ guinness fpr all!
Brilliant!
I think I understand this italics thing
Brilliant!
HTML is fun
Ok it worked but the symbols didn’t show ” on the right of the I or B for italics or bold
Ok, I failed. Apparently I’m not intelligent enough to figure out how to show the greater and lesser symbols. Sorry
Can’t you just put a few spaces between them? Like Words ?
apparently not….
<I>word</I>
or
<B>word</B>
Here’s hoping what i wrote above actually shows up as it’s meant to and i don’t look like a complete fool
phew!
Thanks Jono, that’s much better than my attempt to explain it.
You were actually trying to explain it? I thought you were trying to embarrass emygirl!
No, sadly I was trying to be helpful, but failed miserably. Thank you for making it that much easier to accept.
Nice. My arsenal has vastly increased!
*eery laughter*
Wait, wait! I think I have it this time!
emygirl
emygirl
I will give you a Giant Gummy Bear?
*stares for awhile at the ad*
I will give you 88 Normal Sized Gummy Bears!
*stares for a while at Black Shoes*
Is that a challenge sir?
*turns attention to talldude88*
At dawn we shall duel to the death using only the object which we so love the most.
Hmm…my collection of beanie babies is probably going to be useless… Where’s cupid…I need to fall in love with a Panzer…
Iraqi or Serbian?
He actually meant 100,000 dinner- you will be well fed the rest of your life.
Oh, alright then. Well, if anyone on here is an ant, I can give them 100 dinner. Yeah, it’s THAT bad.
Again, how do you get the whole bolding and italic thing to work?
Please reference earlier fail
a succinct comment on html tags
is posted there
How do so many people not know basic HTML?
Bah you young wipper snappers with your dreamweaver and front page express … back in my day we had to type it all in by hand .. every page .. there was none of this fancy schamancy CSS to eas the way
*doesn’t know what EB is talking about*
heheh Its ok I don’t know what I am talking about some
of the time as well. I still prefer to use basic html when ever
I do a new web page since that is what I learned and have not
really learned anything about CSS and scripting.
LOL, EB, remember that white correction tape you had to type over to correct a mistake? There was no delete or backspace, you better believe it!
*chuckle* hehe Remember when a typing class involved
typewriters?
I liked those ones better than the ones that ripped the wrong characters off the page, though.
We keep a typewriter at the office for typing on certain forms that aren’t online. It’s one of those huge IBM Selectrics… remember those things??? I swear it’s like 20 years old.
Ah, progress…
Fancy! Vintage stuff in the office? Law firm?
How did you know?
Fancy, forms… and you seem like you have no flaws, so you must be hiding something. There’s no other option.
Oooh, Mookie – we have some old school typewriters in my office too. It’s shocking how often we use them.
Carving doesn’t count!
I know HTML, it’s just that a certain site I use often uses [ and ] instead of greater/less than signs. And I don’t know many abbreviations besides bold and italics. There are also sites where the tags just don’t work in comments for no particular reason.
could be Kuwaiti … or Jordanian or Libyian …
Is there a country called Les? Because then the people from there would be called “Lesbian”!
No, but there is a Greek island called Lesbos. I don’t know what the inhabitants would be called though…Lesbonian? Lesbonese? Anyone know?
“The sexualized derivative of the word lesbian originated from the poems of Sappho, who was born in Lesbos, which contain powerful emotional content directed toward other females and have frequently been interpreted as expressing homosexual love (see sexual interpretations). Because of this association, Lesbos and especially the town of Eresos, her birthplace, are visited frequently by lesbian tourists.[2]”
Ergo, the Isle of Lesbos residents are able to claim and have taken to clain they are the only true Lesbians, regardles of gender.
Who would have though that you could find such interesting facts in the Failblog comments…
You must be new here.
Those Greek fiends! How dare they taunt the sacred and sexy union between two totally hot women! I just know that Zeppelin is displeased. And you know who else are displeased? Inpu (Anubis), a whole lotta foxies, Abraham Lincoln, Fox McCloud, and all our other national icons. Two hot women making out is something all straight, horny men and gay women hold sacred. They insult our national icons very strategery-like and then they insult hot women making out? What next? You just know they’re insulting Robert Plant, John Paul Jones, John Bonham (RIP),and Jimmy Page as we speak. Bastards.
What about Jason Bonham? He’s ok with that?
Or Jason Statham? He will stunt drive you to death.
Or Jason from Friday the 13th? He’ll just kill you.
That movie still terrifies me. That and the original Halloween.
they are called lesbain and they have sued the gay and leabain allince name
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/04/30/true_mytilenians/
Or Yugoslavian…
Or Czechislovakian!
Dr. Kevorkian
Or Argelian…
Or just a guy named Ian.
What about Bob?
Maybe, but only on a Saturday.
He can’t build on Saturday though, that is Bob’s day off.
Yugoslavian? Have we gone back in time?
Didn’t you know? AsTheCrowFlies altered the Space-Time Continuum……
*groan*
No, sadly us “trolls” don’t have that kind of power. I was just trying to use it as a bid for the secret of the “first”.
So this is not 1982?!
*removes shoulderpads, deflates hair*
well we are talking about typewriters as well so it could be
No, it’s 1984.
AHhh! The wolf in ErickB’s avatar is moving!
You’re a troll?
I was a little surprised to read that, too…
Hey, don’t judge him!
He’s risking his life by staying up during daylight!
But Trolls are not allowed to bid for the “First” trick!
No, I was just messin around with Egg. I can’t be a troll, since my dad might be a fish…lol
Well and he did use quotation marks around the word ‘troll’.
For emphasis ?
I’ll teach you how to have your watch tell time FROM THE FUTURE!!!!!!1!
Why not take the fitness walk to make room for the cake?
Good idea. If you are dressed in fitness clothes, that would qualify for exercise.
Have your cake and … uhh… something.
… take it for a walk?
Try one of our new walking cakes. Eat your cake while walking!
I would love a cake, but I do not want all the accoutrements like a litter box, and a leash.
And having to pick up all the little tarts and pastries it drops when you take it to the park.
And watch it hump other cakes and then have litters of muffins.
No, it would have a litter of cupcakes. Unless you’re doing some sort of freaky cross-breeding experiments.
Eat your fitness instructor?
Okay, I will! Thanks for the suggestion!
You’re welcome!
Just film it and send me a copy.
Eating at the Y at the Y
Huh????
*wonders how to point out what it means with out being blatant*
well you know the YMCA is referred to as ‘the Y’ and is a gym
*stares blankly* not getting it….
*peers at Mookie to see if she is pulling his leg*
No sir! The only association I have with the YMCA is that song by the Village People. *dates self, yet again*
*chuckle*
)
Are you familiar with the expression “Eating at the Y”, as
referring to a certain activity between 2 consenting adults.
One of which must be a female?
.
yup failblog really needs a PM function or I need to be less
obtuse in my comments
LOL – never heard it called that!!!
*should of that of this before – points Mookie to urban
dictionary*
.
And I just asked another female friend and she says she
has never heard it before either
Don’t worry EB. It was a male innuendo based on the free meals served at the local YMCA and male to female relations. I do not think it was as popular with the women.
I am not female and hadn’t heard it until now…
For some people just getting dressed counts as exercise.
Oh you know me so well…
Dad???
Is your dad a fish???
Well I would hope not, but one never knows for sure.
I’m sure your dad does…
How exactly does a fish type? How exactly can a computer operate under water, or, vice versa, how would a fish servive out of water?
*Replaces ‘e’ with ‘u’*
Be carefull, Loz has the red pen.
*ahem*
*takes crow’s erroneous ‘l’*
D’oh
*facepalm*
Ohh, Loz – nice to see the irony supplements have worn off
Obviously this fish has enslaved its human owner and is now forcing it to do its bidding.
I hope your mom does!
Inpu does. Inpu always does. Inpu can do anything because of his strateg’ry.
I swapped my dad for two goldfish.
Can we trade back, please? Your dad is really fouling up my aquarium.
You were supposed to swap him for something else with someone else so lunatic adventures would ensue as I tried to follow the trail of swapsies to get him back.
P.S. If you’ve drowned and deaded him I don’t want him back.
Not everybody reads the same children literature as you do!
Maybe next time.
WHAT?!? This is an outrage! I’m leaving.
I’ll trade you Mikey’s dad for my original Flash Gordon soundtrack album.
Scha-weeet! *runs for the fishnet*
*runs in the hose*
Damn! *changes stocking*
Those legs go up a long way.
*hands ErickB a ladder*
It’s a well known fact that cake, when eaten standing up by the sink, has no calories.
Same goes for brownies at the oven, cookies at the table, and jello at the fridge.
But if you eat celery at any time, it’s negetive calories. However, it’s not enough for anyone to lose weight.
What if you go on a celery walk? Or eat it standing up by the sink? Then you have double-negative calories…Does that mean you get positive calories?
Oh… math…celery…cake…calories…brain is hurting… KAPLOOM!
That’s not a fail! People work out to be able to stuff themselves with delicious cake, right?
It’s a Cake Chase!
It’s a Pope Chase!
It’s a Chevy Chase!
Oh, Good Days, Bad Days, you know I’ve had my share.
That’s a piece of cake!
Easy as pie.
You guys are such smarty pants!
*For those in America or Canada, you should know what Smarties are. In the US, they are a dull equivalent to SweeTarts, and in Canada, they are the sickeningly rich version of M&M’s*
I guess that would mean mine are the M&M type…*vomits in mouth a little*
Ah, you see, I meant that statement literally. Literally sickening.
Do you eat the red ones last?
You mean the red vomit chunkies? No, that’s gross. Why would you think of something like that?
Mmmm smarties.
How annoying that they changed the packaging though. Bring back the plastic caps with the letters on them!
*Agrees*
Which smarties are you referring to? Chocolate or sweetart-ish?
The packaging you’re speaking of sounds eerily (sp?) sexual… o.O
Plastic caps are sexual? Well, whatever gets you off emygirl…
C’mon, you mean that PLASTIC CAPS don’t sound sexual???
Well maybe if you melt down the plastic and use it as some sort of molten lube that inevitably hardens into a mold of any body part of your choosing, then yes, I would love to have permanent burns.
I don’t know what a ’sweetart’ is… I’m talking about the Smarties that are similar to M&Ms.
They used to come in cardboard tubes with a little plastic cap on the end, and on the underside of the cap there was a little embossed letter. So you’d collect them until you had the whole alphabet… or maybe that was just me…
I remember the M&M Minis tubes…I don’t remember the Smarties tubes though.
M&M copied that too?!! Boo to them!
My comment may have been better placed here.
Ah well. Smarties never taught me that.
Loz,
I google’d “Smarties Tubes” (you’re comment intrigued me) and had my world view completely shattered (well, not really).
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/4276553.stm
The tube package that you mentioned was actually the original way that Smarteis were packaged when they first came out in 1937. Nestle changed the packaging in 2005. I’ve never encounter these packages before though. All of the Smarties I’ve ever eaten came in a rectangular cardboard box. Nestle must have packaged their candy differently to appeal to the Canadian market….
I was wondering about that – I don’t recall ever having seen smarties in a tube before. In Canada they’ve been in rectangular boxes since the 80’s at least.
Arg, failblog ate my post again…
I’ve only ever seen the rectangular packages in Canada.
Smarties = Mormon Cocaine
I blame the change in smarties packaging for the severe decline in literacy that is evident in children leaving school nowadays.
With the plastic tops, they had letters you could collect to form words, because smarties did indeed have the answer.
With the hexagonal packaging there is no lids, therefore no letters, therefore no making words to unlock the answers.
And let’s face it, who wants to eat out of a hexagonal prism?
I prefer my sweets out of a dodecahedron.
It’s a b*tch to get the lid off though…
I’ve never seen smarties in a box–they are always wrapped in clear plastic that has been twisted on the ends to stay closed. And smarties are definitely more like SweeTarts than M&Ms. Smarties don’t have any chocolate!!
Please go back up and read emygirl’s post where she helpfully points out that the name “Smarties” is used for two different candies in Canada and the US.
I’ve actually learned to count with smarties (the chocolate ones). Empty the box, count them all, eat one, put in the box. Rinse and repeat until you got no more..
Was fun.
Have you people never heard of cake walks..? o_o
It’s more the irony of a cake walk juxtaposed with a fitness walk, as cake is antithetical to fitness.
By Inpu and all that is good and Zeppelin, this decision represents life. Does one work to better oneself or to satisfy one’s desires? Does one work out because one’s body is a temple or because one desires her “temple” joining one’s “temple” in bed for a bit? This “fail” is a philosophical win.
It is almost as much win as Inpu (Anubis), baby Jesus, Abraham Lincoln, Fox McCloud, and all our other beloved icons all in one place. Oh and Krystal. Can’t have a win without blue vixens. It’s just not done.
Does one stop talking of confusing philosilosophicable crap, or return to their “temple” to take an Inpu?
“Philosilosophicable”??
Just had to throw a few more syllables in there?
Damn straight she did. Know why? She doesn’t let some snobby Ancient Greek tell her how many syllables to add.
One does not take an Inpu (Anubis). He takes you and he brought some Zeppelin and Iron Maiden. Lucky you.
I like that word. I’m going to try and use it somewhere.
“Temple” ?
“to”
Ahh, well good luck finding a place to use that one.
It’s gonna be tricksy. You’d think such a useful word would have come to my attention before now.
Finding a place to use “philosilosophicable” was easy though.
Is there a Cole’s Notes version of this post? Are any of these things going to be on the final exam?
Teacher! Teacher! If one’s body as a temple housed the likes of said beloved icons “all in one place” would that temple be more sacred than the sum of its parts?
You’re just upset that Horus is a Chozo and didn’t give you special magic space armor like they gave Samus.
No, there are no notes. And yes. This will be on the test. And you should know that because of America’s assertive foreign policy, its national icons will soon become everyone’s national icons. Especially Canada and the UK. After all, how can you get more American than the sixteenth President, the Egyptain jackal-headed god of mummification, two fictional anthropomorphic foxes from an awesome Japanese company known as Nintendo, an ancient baby Jew that was destined to die on the cross, rise from the dead, and start (directly or indirectly) the second, and largest Abrahamic religion, etc? You can’t. They represent democracy, more-than-assertive foreign policy, and American football. Not wuss “international football”. I’m talking the one with the body armor and nasty injuries. You know, impact sports.
I think I’m going to fail this class…
Seems like somebody’s home needs a good ole-fashioned American-led regime change.
But… what about Zepp?
Groucho, Harpo, Chico, Gummo, and Zeppo
*chaos ensues*
Nyah. American football is just a wussy version of rugby. Wearing all that armour and being allowed to throw the ball forwards. Ridiculous.
Hehe, *high-fives*
Hmm…I detect a definite air of floccinaucinihilipilification…
Ooooh, thats an even better word than ‘Philosilosophicable’, and your word exists!
What about rugby? Violent impact sport minus the body armour
Who’s the wuss now?
And they throw the ball backwards in rugby to make it that extra bit harder. *high five*
Armor? You mean weapons. The armor is not only shitty (your knees are still very vulnerable), it actually encourages to hit a hell lot harder, making it extremely likely to eventually cripple one’s knees.
Inpu and Bonham frown on your ignorance of football’s armor’s shittiness and basic human psychology. You fail, sir. You lose.
Oh please. Take away the armor and they’ll actually be more careful. Helmets=go crazy. No helmet=be careful so that you don’t crack your head open tackling too hard.
It’s all psychology. We Americans realized that when you add padding to sports, said sports get more violent as players can now get more aggressive and violent without breaking said aggressive player’s neck. Stop drinking the ancient Greeks’ kool-aid.
Cole’s Notes? Are those like Cliff Notes?
Cake for me too, please!
Well, we’re OUT of cake! We only had three bits and didn’t expect such a rush.
So what do you want?
Very well! Give him cake, too! We’re gonna run out of cake at this rate.
You! Cake or death?
THAT CAKE IS A LIE!!!
A LIE??
*signs up for the cake walk to try to fill the emotional void this lie has caused*
It’s an ancient Greek cake?
I think I see a pattern forming here…
Yes, it’s called the ‘Boring Pattern’. Copyright 2008 capt. awesome, patent pending.
photoshop can be quite an amazing tool.
*labels you ‘troll until proven otherwise’* Yes, it can. Was it used in this picture? I doubt it.
Cake or Death? Cake, please.
Death Cake for Cutie.
is delicious cake, you must eat it.
finally get to use a Stairway to Heaven quote.
There’s a sign on the wall, but she wants to be sure, ‘cuz you know sometimes words have two meanings.
Chooz? Chooz? What is this, ICHC???
Okay, I want to post this under the smarties/candy discussion but for some reason whenever I try to “reply to this comment” it doesn’t work. Explanation please?
So, this is what smarties mean to me, and they have always been packaged this way that I have seen: http://thesift.atlblogs.com/images/smarties.jpg
There is no decision because the cake is not a prize that you win at the end of the walk. Those who enter the ‘walk’ are to donate a cake to be auctioned. You could also donate a fruit basket. READ!
NO U
Way to kill the effect of the fail. *frown* I wasn’t joking btw, way to go, you win.
You can go to the cake walk first and then go to the fittness walk to burn off the carbs. And drop dead from exhaustion because Lord knows those things are like ten miles long and they always happen when its a hundred something degrees outside… :-/
it’s like..chocolate mentos…
what happened to sixlets?
ELEVENTIETH!
and on top of that, wtf is BSA?? bull**** avenue??
so like..fat people who are proud go to the cake walk, fat people who wanna lost weight go to the fitness walk, skinny people who are proud go to the fitness walk, skinny people who wanna be fat go to the cake walk…this is just too much D:
I PIK KAKE. KLOSEST TIHNG TO CHEEZBURGUR