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Cheezburger Network Blog
douchey burger
I tried that burger and it smelled bad.
It didn’t smell bad when I tried it….they just put the vinegar on the burger instead of the fries. and some sort of foam…….why was there foam?
Hey guys, let’s go down to the Brazier for a Doucheburger!!!
Nah. Brassier is better.
i have a booty
For dinner or snack on a summer’s eve?
Pass the douchey burger on the left hand side.
hahahahah!
oh, you people crack me up!
hahaaahahahaha!
Double-douche bag burge to go, thanks.
Hot queens with burgers
Hot Douches with burgers?
Bet they have hot buns, too!
But they’re cross and all cranky.
Never get in the way of a cranky douche with burning buns…
$3.33? They are cheaper at Wal-Mart and they come in cammo.
its not cammo its poor storage
Homecoming queens with wieners.
And brazeers.
Haven’t we seen this before???
You may be thinking of “Keep screaming until Daddy stops”.
Or the voting page. That always gets ‘em. Deja Vu fail.
Failja Vu.
Prices high? What’s the fail? Oh, and my earliest comment evah.
Yeah prices high, that’s it… there are so many douches around here you’d think they’d be cheaper.
Oh, douche as an insult as opposed to a word for a shower or something? One day I might grasp that North American slang…
Still not funny though.
Language is usually good for a laugh though. Now that I think about it, the German word for shower is “Dusche”.
So ‘Shower burger’ is normal for you?
Nothing compares to clean beef.
True, I always make sure my beef is very clean when in the shower.
I provide a beef cleaning service. I only charge £5 and I’m very thorough.
Umm, if it says ‘douche’ then there’s still ‘eburg’ left…
So no doucheburger >.<
Douche e-burger.
It’s an ELECTRONIC doucheburger.
Huh?
Think e-mail compared to mail…
I have not laughed that hard in a really long time. Thanks
*exits stage right for a few hours to contemplate service*
Okay, get back to me.
Do you accept Euros?
Loz may want dinar, regardless.
Yes, I accept Euro. €6 please.
The dinar is optional, but it is the decent gentlemanly thing to do…
I have a yen for some vagetables. Does the beef cleaning service clean those also?
You must be feeling quite Randy?
Oh yes, in fact, vagetable cleaning is our speciality.
Do you do beef curtains as well?
Yup, and clams!
what about crabs? can you clean those?
I’ll be franc with you, Admiral; if yuan to come over here, and akşa very nicely, I’ll show you my own personal treasure…!
There are certainly a bevy of harlets of negotiable affection here. It’s like Amsterdam all over again.
Yes ghehorg. Shave one side, soak the other in kerosene. Get a bat, light the kerosene side and beat them with the bat when they run to the shaved side.
Lira it up to dragon to drag the tone down
You should be locked up in a pound where the trolls are euro-nly friends.
Sorry! REFRESH darn it.
So many currency puns… I think I’ll go and KIP on my back.
(please don’t FOOM me)
Dragon, you know I won to come. I’m always up forint. Perhaps you should pesos tonight.
Budju promised to take me out to dinner first, remember. I have a cupon.
Oh, I’m sorry, this coupon’s expired.
That coupon is for the Captain’s Galleon. I got sickle a bit the last time I ate there, and I’m not knuts enough to go back.
Okay, to hell with dinner. Let’s just drink some gulden wine and get real snuggly on this couch here.
Oo. You kyat me!
You look a little wobbly there. Are you already piastred?
*sits on couch*
Rublis more comfortable if you lay your head in my lap.
Mmm…
*schuggles into your lap*
…Hee! Hey, that ticals!
Kwacha think about settling down for the night? Litas retire to your lair.
You are in-kori-gible.
(Don’t forget your shoes…I finally brought them to you on the “drunk” thread.)
*retires*
o.O Sorry to interrupt, but… does anyone else see Dragon’s “Dammit! I fell again” post nesting past the no-nesting point? Did someone break the space-time continuum again?
I have skillz.
are they mad?
Being a repeate customer, I can heartily endorse m’lady’s beef cleaning service. I’ve already lost twenty pounds this year!
i often eat burgers whilst showering, but one time I accidentally the whole urinal cake
And in french, it’s “douche”: spelled exactly the same way…
$199 for a banana split… that better be one hell of a banana!
Oh, it is, my friend, it is!!! I gotta warn you though, it grows rapidly.
And it comes with a conga line.
And anal fisting.
and cheese!! edan of course.
Great. You have 10 weeks to come up with a pop song parody with lyrics paying tribute to your favorite fails. Good luck.
BotW!
MMMMMMM…. try the all new Douche Burger, sponsored by Wal Mart.
Ultra!
Summer fresh!
Try the Douche Burgers, they’re only half evil!
Only half? That’s less than 90%!
hmm nothing funny today @ failblorg.
You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.
strange… no one noticed that I failed – writing failblorg instead of failblog.
FAIL WIN
!
or WIN FAIL, whatever.
BTW, FAIL FTW IMHO. NM.
Lol, imo, stfu. Jeez. >:(
ROFL
OMGWTFKFCBBQ to all of you.
BKMcDARBYS right back atcha…
hard on ?!?!?!?
*masturbates*
Drive through Dairy Queen. Hmmm now there’s an idea!
Be careful, you could get a Doucheburger in the way and also get your banana split.
I can has side order of cottage cheese with my doucheburger?
That is a nasty thought…..
Cellulite, it’s the new condiment.
Banana split, it’s the new profolactic.
yeowch!!!!
yea but its just a bit of shmeg around the edges….
Do you want extra vinegar with that?
no, the fail is enough for me
Also note the price-sign fail. I mean yes, those are common and not at all funny…
But has anyone else ever wondered how it’s possible to be so anal-retentive that you don’t even notice that the characters that you just put up on that sign are BACKWARDS?
-K
I noted it. But how did you write backwards?
Very carefully.
with the force
^^ One trick pony ^^ of the Shetland variety. No appaloosa or clydesdale here.
But he turns that trick with pride!
how do they get that backwards “b”?
ROFL
In a mirror?
Of course, the ‘O’ is backwards. I knew that didn’t look right.
No the “O” is upside down! Sheesh some people.
i’m just wondering how they got that B without the line
and that backwards d
I think he means the backwards dollar sign. And you must realize that there are fast-food employees, most of which are in thier 30’s. Don’t be so hard on them, the welfare office already forced them into jobs, how cruel does life have to be?
*I so used to work at Dairy Queen in Seattle*
Liar. There are no Dairy Queens in Seattle. Even the DQ/Orange Julius in the Northgate Mall is gone.
Wait – I think I figured out how they got those backwards thingys on there. They got a forwards thingy, made it look it a mirror, took a picture, scanned the mirror, and printed out the backwards thingy! See? It’s just that easy!
.
Am I right, or am I right?
…
Oh forget it, I’ll just go eat my doucheburger now. (Damn it, that sounded more sexual than it was meant to sound.)
*in, not it. (after “look”)
“I’ll have one Doucheburger. Hold the cheese.”
“Would you like vinegar or unscented?”
“Just make it taste like a nice summer’s eve.”
Why not ask for Midnight Whisper so your cooter has someone to talk to at night
Your cooter talks?
Wry Cooter
Catcher in the Wry Cooter?
drinking whiskey and Wry Cooter?
Oh whiskey, rye whiskey, whiskey I cried
if I don’t get rye whiskey I surely will die
Yeah I’ve had a few burgers with that ‘not so fresh’ feeling.
then they need full throttle douche bottle.
Ha! Gross!
Hmmm… Screw this, I’m going to Hooters, home of the FUR-burger.
…
…Lolwut?
Bob and Tom FTW!
I heard a rumor that hooters girls wear their apron pouches on the front to cover cameltoe. Has anyone else heard this or is it a job for Mythbusters?
Camel toe. Always better than a moose knuckle…
Don’t leave out whale tail.
Can I have a side of thighs with that?
French thighs or American thighs?
American thighs will knock you out.
I prefer them with salt.
Now we know why you have to scream for daddy to stop.
I can only imagine the class of person who would have thought that was funny in the first place, and then brings it up again.
My god, the stick up his butt must have a stick up its butt!
That was an image I did NOT need in my mind before I went to sleep.
it’s 2 Double Cheese burgers >.>
GIVE ME 2 DOUCHEBURGERS
Hold the smegma.
you dont like smeg on your doucheburgers?!?!?!?! FREAK! *walks off muttering to self about how weird mookie is
Oh, I love smegma, but I’m allergic.
Smegmose Intolerant
LOL!
Q. Why did the Dairy Queen get pregnant?
A. The Burger King forgot to wrap his Whopper.
on old MacDonald’s farm?
E I E I ‘HO.
Trespasser!!!
Time to prostitute!
I thought trespassers were only prostituted in Vegas and family farms in Arkansas…….
Go look up sign fail
It’s terrible how they need to use a deterrent like prostitution to stop people trespassing. You’d think the $200 fine you can get from touching the instant-death-causing electric fence would be enough.
There’s a Dominos near here that apparently ran out of Zs for their sign, so they used Ss. There was a really big storm once, and the A fell off.
Result: “LARGE PISS ONLY $9!”
Wow, I love when Dominos sets up low prices for pisses!
I can has doucheeburg?
Their prices are outrageous and their burgers are too moist!
$3.33 for a pair of doucheburgers? Fail indeed. I wouldn’t pay more than $2.50 for a pair of doucheburgers. You fail, Dairy Queen.
I can has doucheeburg?
Pass the doucheeburg on the left hand side.
Sounds like a town name: Twodoucheburg. You can buy the whole place for just 333 dollars.
Doucheeeeeburrrrg!!!!
ROFL, I was in Wisconsin a few weeks ago, and I saw a Dairy Queen sign that said “Chix Strip”. I was going to take a picture, though my camera was in the trunk, while in a four way intersection. I fail.
You had a camera in your trunk while in a four-way? Sounds kinky!
Can — not — breathe — laughing — too — hard!!
so while the camara was in your trunk you took pictures while having a fourway with an intersection in front of the dairy queen??? im soo confused
dude, go back!
Too bad the only drink they let you get with the doucheburger combo is cheap beer…
Hey baby, take the brazier off your Dairy Queens.
thanks for the mammaries
wow… on top of that they put the dollar sign on backwards to the right…
Double Cheese Burger isnt really meant to be shortened.Lol.All Fail Doucheburg
what sucks the most about the douchee burger is it’s $333
I think I’d rather have two double cheesebugers than two douche burgers.
Dammit! I fell again.