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Cheezburger Network Blog
wat?
wet?
Why do you say ‘wet’?
Why ask Why?
Why wet ask?
Twat did you say?
I c*nt hear you
Spunk up!
As you wish, m’lady!
*masterbates*
i like to masturbate
Hey! No dirty talk! Think of the children!
tits ok you’ll finger it out.
failping!
that was the most sophisticated unsophisticated reply grouping.
Forgot the ‘T’ you did.
I pity the fool!
who eat my cereal…..
i think that silly rabbit got away with your cereal…if not it was the leprechaun…
imagen waking up and a rabbit is next to you
That explains the carrot in my bed every morning
that’s not a carrot…it’s your morning wood!
Umm
Give the guy a break there is no possible way he could know your a woman, with the exception of the picture of a woman and the woman name. How could he know!?!?
(all in good fun mr. cuddles)
Maybe Ryannon is very well organised and has her morning wood delivered just before she wakes?
Agreed. My morning wood is delivered just before I wake.
So this time I woke up a little bit too early and saw those little gnomes delivering my morning wood.
And leaving with your underwear?
Was that at 2PDT?
They indeed threatened me to take my underwear if i didn’t pay them at least their mim wage
(
my desk is made of wood :3
in Soviet-Russia cereal eats you
HA HA HA !!!!!!!!! I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TIRED!!!
vacancy?
I wouldn’t stay there. It’s just a soggy hole.
I applied for a job but didnt have any experience raping.
I’m sorry they wouldn’t hier you, even at mim wage.
Trespassing can be another option, if you don’t mind a slight change in job scope.
previous fail reference win!
mention reference is a previous fail reference fails
And don’t worry, we make the best of your two soggy holes.
THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!! ONLY WEEKLY RAPES!?
Photoshop.
Dreamweaver
Illustrator
Paint?
Notepad!
CS3?
(I started to say that, and didn’t… lol)
Premiere?
CF developer
Gimpshop?
Couldn’t be. Gimp’s sleeping.
Corel :frown:
PhotoPlus *gasp*
Picasa
Ascii art with Notebook?
Win!
ASCII art with notepad.
Analogue art with notebook?
Etch-a-scetch?
Black velvet Elvis
Mississippi in the middle of a dry spell?
All 64 colors
Paint.NET?
Actually it’s not Photoshop. Some friends and I changed it, the other side said “Ask about our Sunday special” so we took the ‘P’ and changed the ‘T’
I grew up in Billings Park a mile from this motel. Nicely done!
lmao DAILY!?!?!
well, you can see it’s a cheap motel.
Then I better make sure I get my rape
Which is nice.
Finally, a hotel for perverts with rape fantasies!
That’s what they get for hiring teen boys to put up the letters in the sign, I can hear the giggles from here.
well better then what they are using the teen girls for…
hirr
which is rape
Which you should expect in this hotel.
Because that is what they advertise.
Must be where Kobe Bryant stays.
How about that big ugly boxer who bites off ears stays there too. I can’t think of his name.
Mike Tyson, there it is…
Chewbacca?
Chewing tobacco?
wugggg(chewbacca noise) means no
third
Would that be, one rape per week, or a week-long marathon rape? Confused.
i hope it’s the week-long marathon one…anyone know how i can get to this motel? hahah!
You can’t rape the willing.
But you can prostitute them when trespassing.
^^
The best damn use of this website I have ever heard. Kudos Feyn, kudos.
Just remember, if you shout surprise first, it isn’t rape, it’s just surprise sex
The week-long is only available with the honeymoon package.
And you are advised to bring your own chloroform as they buy it in quantity and are rumored to water it down.
Can I also bring my own coliform ?
Just no broccoli
Zucchini FTW.
And do not forget that sexual harassment is welcomed
And whore kids come first!
3th
doh- fail
awwww
ewwww
FREAK OUT!
Well at least they’re organized about it. I wonder what day this all happens.
FIRST!!!
The only good clown is a dead clown.
Captain Spaulding is the only clown I’ve ever liked.
“The beds are a bit rough. When I wake up, my butthole hurts.”
ROFL
This must be where the trespassers are sent.
After filling that job application. They only hire experienced rapists.
Holiday Inn Select has DAILY Rapes. I’m going there. This place is a rip…
that’ll be 65 dollars
Per rape or per night?
For the whole conference.
Wait, do i get to be the raper or the rapee?
Depends on your raping experience. If you have been raping for a long time then you can be the raper. If this is your first rape then you have to be the rapee.
A rapist-in-training program? Can I use my GI Bill benefits for that? Do you get certified after a certain number of rapes?
I believe you have to go through an internship.
And then hands-on training.
Mmmmm… hands-on. Mikey Likey.
*hands on mikey*? Is that a command?
Have you met Mikey? That’s what I named my ‘parts’. *looks down* Oh, I see you two have met!
Shouldn’t that be “*looks at Ryannon’s jar* Oh, I see you two have met!”?
I hope never to get that far…. *makes mental note to never ever ever propose marriage to Ryannon*
*innocent look*
For the first part you will be working under an experienced trainer.
*Pictures statuesque Amazon wearing a black-leather corset and an SS cap*
Dreamer.
Trainer is likely to be a very burly, hairy chested matron named Myrtle.
Dont forget your safe word!
FLǕGGȦ∂NKđ€ČHIŒβǾLʃÊN
LOL!
ROFL!
That’s hilarious!
But is this a paid internship? I mean, the experience is nice to put on your resume, but I’m broke!
And if you look sharp you can be the rapier.
Nice to have the option!
Would you like a man Friday, or all week?
Does it have to be the same man every day?
Men changed daily!
Into what?
Do you mean in general or when I am done with them?
When you have finished, just ring for room service and place the washed out, empty one outside your door. A fresh one will be supplied in a few minutes.
I wonder if they have extended stay rates. I could get used to this kind of service
Serviced with a smile ma’am!
I always loved service men
You can service me bitch.
It’s just like with the towels.
If you want them cleaned just let them lie on the floor.
But if you are okay with using them a second (or a third and so on) time you have to put them on their hook..
Ieek!
Naw, I don’t like sloppy second times.
You’re driving on Crusoe control today, aren’t you?
Yeah, but it’s primitive as can be.
Still…it’s a novel idea.
I almost didn’t make that comment for fear that the Professor was going to reprimand me for not taking the high road. I was betting on a run of comments by the time you got to it.
*tries to make the best of things*
Hee…I think most people have learned not to get between us, don’t you think? Besides, you know I always save the spanki…er, I mean reprimands for when we’re in private.
And…what are these “best things” of which you speak..??
Isn’t this where Dr. Phil goes?m Ooooh, THERAPIST, not THE RAPIST…..
Suck it Trebek
This must have been the company that asked job applicants how much experience they had raping.
They are always hiering at the Manning Motel.
Damn. I should have scrolled down…I should have known my Admiral would get to this joke first! :p
I have to call “staged” on this one. I don’t believe this is a genuine fail. Some adolescent, or a disgruntled employee on his last day MEANT to do this….
No, not really.. The fact that it stayed up long enough for someone to take a picture makes it a fail on the management’s part. The sign did its job, the management failed to do theirs
Changing the sign and taking the picture could have taken all of 5 minutes. Show me the manager that’s walking outside every 5 minutes to check the sign, and I’ll show you a manager that’s ripe for “downsizing”.
I have to say staged or PS’ed. Look beyond the obvious at the context of the pic: Dark, Framed perfect, no flash was used. (proly taken on a tripod) The picture was taken “too” deliberately IMHO.
That’s ridicolous
At least it’s not ridiculous.
Flash doesn’t work at that distance, and it’s easy enough to take photos in those conditions without a tripod—all you need is a wall, bin, car or something else to rest the camera on, or even a wall to lean against. The photo is little different to many night-time photos I’ve taken without a tripods. It does not take significant time or effort.
If this was staged or PS’ed, there would be no dark signs at the left side at all.
Blue’s comment looks photoshopped to me. It’s too perfect.
I agree with Lunchbox. The management plundered when they let this sign stay up.
I think we need to plumb the depths of this mystery!
That’s a pretty big plunge…
*gets out of the way*
No worries, Joe the Plunger is on the job.
I can’t fathom what we’d find.
We should form a league and investigate.
This is sounding good.
It does have a spooky atmosphere.
Staged or not, it is still funny.
Look, they have vacancies! Let’s go book a room, shall we? I do so enjoy a good rape every now and then! And remember kiddies, you can’t rape the willing!!!
What about the ready and able?
How about the cheap and sleazy?
*raises hand*
Pick me….Pick me!
I’ll take you, and you, annnndddd…. you… and….. you, with the wings, you can come too!
Am I too late to the party? I brought rags and chloroform!
Excellent, now if you’ll just follow me down this dark alleyway…
Are you trying to get me to trespass?
No, never! I respect you too much for that…. but if you’re offering…
What about me!
If you pick me your income will be even hier!
Positions open, apply in the rear
May I jerk at will or do I need the permission by the jerking authority?
*knocks at back door*
“Who is it?”
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, know what I mean?
You Can rape the able…..but not the ready
Better than Bates Motel
How about Master Bates Motel? Is it better than that?
Is the Master Bates Motel near Dildo, New Foundland?
Right between there and Climax, Minnesota.
As long as it isn’t near Crotch Lake Ontario, there’s something fishy about that place.
They need a Wal Mart. That would solve the smell, for certain.
Look for a midget in a watercraft.
Okay that made me laugh enough to make all the old biddies in my office want to know what is so funny.
Let me guess.
They all instantly went on their holydays to check in at this very hotel.
Nothing is better than that! *slips room key into your pocket*
It is now Fail to speak the truth?
Not anymore!
Obama is pres!
The conga line forms over there, next to the Oreos.
Alternatively, there’s a conga line forming on the Urinal Fail thread…
and thier slogan is:
WERE CUMING!
You’re not going to curry flavor with that spelling.
MOTFL.
100% shooped.
At Wal-Mart?
Snoop Shooped?
Shoop shoop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop ba-doop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop
Shoop ba-doop ba-doop ba-doop
The men were altered?
If you stay there, you are asking for it.
Then it isn’t rape
Nope, it’s called trespassing.
This sounds like a Sublime place to take a date.
Dat rape, how a lot of marriages started.
Date*
Oh… I thought she was referring to outdated computer equipment replacement costs…
I think he was asking Ryannon on a date.
*looks up at POB*
Well?
No no no, don’t even get me near trouble with Loz.
But, he could take you out for Burritos, and sing you a Ballad of Johnny Butt… and on the way home you can do a little Drunk Driving!
Outdated? DDS/5?
In a bar in downtown Hell?
In that part of town, they probably do have weekly rapes.
Downtown they weakly rape!
But they keep their pimp hand strong.
Gorgeous motel, typo or no.
yeeee… oh, I mean: how disgusting
They probably meant “weekly rates available”.
Oh, now I get it. Thanks Holmes!
At least they’re upfront about their “special” menu unlike those snooty masseuses.
*sings* You can get the rape emphatic.
You can get the rape polite.
You can get the rape with Indians:
A very charming sight.
You can get the rape on horseback;
They say it’s new and gay.
So you see the sort of rape
Depends on what you pay.
I’ll pass, kthx.
What? Weekly “rates”, right?
This is a known fake….
sorry guys….
I like the live action video better. Because its like movie maker was raped by photo-shop. On a weekly basis.
That must be the one whenre i got my ass done
this would be funny if it hadn’t already been posted on this site… as with the last two ones as well.
AVALABLE