Chicken != female, chicken is chicken. Maybe this will help:
Frank Costanza: Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who’s having sex with the hen?
George Costanza: Why don’t we talk about it another time.
Frank Costanza: But you see my point here? You only hear of a hen, a rooster and a chicken. Something’s missing!
Mrs. Ross: Something’s missing all right.
Mr. Ross: They’re all chickens. The rooster has sex with all of them.
Frank Costanza: That’s perverse.
hey..hey…megavideo lets me watch house and bones when i miss them for sports; so what if theyre not a species specific match? im fine with it. as long as i get my house.
Well, that’s true. But I know him! He brings me out of my shell.
For some reason I can’t see any of the recent posts on Trophy fail. It did this to mw on Fasting fail too.
Update: If you go to the bottom of the page on the Trophy fail and click “show all”, you can see the new posts. But you can’t get to them with the shortcut links at the side of the page.
You really are missing out. You don’t realize how sexy a semi-willing chicken beak grimace is until you’ve caught the “yellow bird flu fever”.
____
(HA! Killerwit ain’t here, so I ain’t chicken to steal his shit!)
The rumors of my lying have been greatly exaggerated.
.
But, dammit woman, if you try to gimme anything more than some little deaths in the kitchen, I’ll ARIP you another pair of panties.
1. Thank you for the spelling clarification of your said nationality. I was actually referring to the employees of the Scotts lawn products company, or would have you believe such to make it look like I didn’t mis-spell it.
2. Common American stereotypes.. or my own sick mind? Not sure yet.
3. I think you’re just saying that. There’s a saying, that ends, “… In Scotland, where the men are men and the sheep are nervous”.
Shagging shaggy cattle? And who hasn’t heard the joke: You know whay Scots wear kilts? Because sheep can hear zippers. .. Sheep shagging Scots, stereotypical.
He can’t be in the tree top, he’s flightless. Which is a good thing because he can’t poop in your mouth. Although I think HoneyStarr might be into that sort of thing.
He may be flightless, but I think somebody put him up to it. Might have been every little swallow, every chickadee, every little bird in the tall oak tree. And/or the wise old owl, and the big black crow, flapping them wings sayin’ go bird go. I’m just sayin’.
Some studies have shown that directions given by women tend to work better than those given by men, when it comes actually to getting persons to where they wish to go.
.
Men tend to emphasize cardinal directions (north, south, etc.) and distances. Women tend to emphasize landmarks. Landmarks tend to be of more practical usefulness.
All my life, I’ve lived in places where there was water to the east of me. Uppsala, Milwaukee, New York, Philadelphia–whenever I face north, there is water on the right. This gives me comfort, and a sense of continuity and direction.
Then I moved to the West coast.
I drove to the Oregon coast to visit my aunt one weekend. When the directions said, “Turn north on Highway 101,” I turned…left. Water on the right.
It took me 20 miles to figure out I was going the wrong way.
i know the feeling! though in my case the water is kind of a secondary thing, being surrounded by desert- but having grown up in boston, i can’t fathom being east of downtown, but now i live east of Phoenix, i used to get turned around quite easily… i’ve been here 7 years now, so i’m finally getting used to it…
That’s not a fail. That chicken is the perfect date for a person from Singapore. Now if she was from Tijuana she’d need to be matched up with a donkey.
The chicken still appears more attractive than the girl across from it….
And as a bonus, chicken seems to have the legal age.
And, if it doesn’t work out, you can eat it!!
If it doesn’t taste good, you can puke it!
you mean – if it’s fowl?
You’re on a wing and a prayer with that one.
That bird is just a flusie.
I think you mean a braisened hussy. (I’d personally be chicken to have a relationship with Jorge.)
You’d probably prefer a chick, Fuzz.
You’re right — just so long as she’s legal AND tender.
I’d prefer legal tender.
For Jorge?
I’d reckon that would be counterfeit.
And it would just amount to chicken scratch anyway.
Its such a poultry amount, especially in this economy
HoneyStarr likes little peckers.
↑ *is not made with genuine honey*
Wow, every comment above this is a freaking EPIC WIN
Actually, all of these comments are produced by failures who have no social lives.
Nobody asked you.
Askalittlegoober knows all about being a life failure — ask anybody.
And watch what a dumbass he makes of himself on the rest of this page.
^Askagod Speaks the Truth!^
Is it too late to egg you all on?
Similar to you good fail
i personally think all of you people dig me as well as mariah’s song TOUCH MY BODY
what’s so funny about this? Members of PETA need loving too!!!
(you’ve all seen it on south-park)
I wonder if Jorge tastes like chicken.
She’ll find out and report back to us.
MMMMM….Jorge
enjorged^
If it tastes like chicken, keep on lick’n
LOL!
Aaahhhh…now we know what Honeystarr was REALLY searching for when she found that match.
Chicken != female, chicken is chicken. Maybe this will help:
Frank Costanza: Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who’s having sex with the hen?
George Costanza: Why don’t we talk about it another time.
Frank Costanza: But you see my point here? You only hear of a hen, a rooster and a chicken. Something’s missing!
Mrs. Ross: Something’s missing all right.
Mr. Ross: They’re all chickens. The rooster has sex with all of them.
Frank Costanza: That’s perverse.
O RLY?
hey..hey…megavideo lets me watch house and bones when i miss them for sports; so what if theyre not a species specific match? im fine with it. as long as i get my house.
Bird house?
That joke flew over my cuckoo’s nest.
Haha, same here. I just discovered megavideo the other day when trying to watch House from the beginning.
yeah megavideo’s not bad, but they fail for showing these stupid match things every time you pause..
There is a match for every situation!
But the chicken is all the way in Singapore… I’m not sure I want a long-distance relationship with a chicken…
All the chickens I’ve known have been rubbish on the phone.
So Avis, is that anyone you know up there?
I am not a chicken. I am a very rare and vociferous bird. Colorful too.
mmm… lemme see yo’ plumage.
I forgot to add “shy”.
just camera shy, and I dont have a camera….
I’ll bet The Boy would disagree with you there, Avis!
Well, that’s true. But I know him! He brings me out of my shell.
For some reason I can’t see any of the recent posts on Trophy fail. It did this to mw on Fasting fail too.
I can’t either…it’s been giving me fits. For some reason, it’s trying to divide the comments there into two pages, and it’s FAILing miserably!!
Update: If you go to the bottom of the page on the Trophy fail and click “show all”, you can see the new posts. But you can’t get to them with the shortcut links at the side of the page.
*pouts*
Is there anything we can do? It sounds like it’s not my computer, or user error. I seems like the site is experiencing difficulty.
I’ll email Ms. Fail Blog and ask her.
It!! It!! damned little bitty boxes!
*snerk*
“Show all”, what does that mean again?
Here, let me demonstrate for everyone. *reaches for top button*
You people are gigantic fails at life.
NO U
You should clean your phone!
disinfect it, too. Don’t want to get bird flu.
You really are missing out. You don’t realize how sexy a semi-willing chicken beak grimace is until you’ve caught the “yellow bird flu fever”.
____
(HA! Killerwit ain’t here, so I ain’t chicken to steal his shit!)
I saw what you did there…and I’m tellin’! :p
uh oh …
*starts writing last wit and testimony*
Uh-oh… Here lies fuzzy. He enjoyed etymologies, lepidoptery and bunnehs. ARIP, darlin’. We should also not forget his went from “enter” to “escape”.
The rumors of my lying have been greatly exaggerated.
.
But, dammit woman, if you try to gimme anything more than some little deaths in the kitchen, I’ll ARIP you another pair of panties.
That’s it, we’re going to the mall.
the mall has candy!
In Soviet Russia, phone cleans you!
… and Jorge phones you.
Only he’ll wait three weeks.
Yes. The emails would be slow in arriving. Chickens use the hunt and peck system of typing, you know.
Sweet and sour – but the chicken or the girl…?
I pick chicken. Assuming I can eat it later.
Playing with your food before eating?
Have you never eaten asian?
No, that would be hillbillies and Scottsmen…
Just a few points to make lunchbox..
1. “Scottsmen” is actually spelled “Scotsmen”
2. Where did you get that idea from?
3. Having lived in Scotland all my life I can assure you that we don’t go around shagging animals
1. Thank you for the spelling clarification of your said nationality. I was actually referring to the employees of the Scotts lawn products company, or would have you believe such to make it look like I didn’t mis-spell it.
2. Common American stereotypes.. or my own sick mind? Not sure yet.
3. I think you’re just saying that. There’s a saying, that ends, “… In Scotland, where the men are men and the sheep are nervous”.
I’ve always heard that in reference to Montana.
That was until the dental floss herds took over.
this sounds like kev?
I’ve seen your cattle. They’re very shaggy.
Shagging shaggy cattle? And who hasn’t heard the joke: You know whay Scots wear kilts? Because sheep can hear zippers. .. Sheep shagging Scots, stereotypical.
fite 2 teh deth figgopts
oh for Pete’s sake! no more typing this morning, since I can’t spell properly … *sigh*
i wonder if my penis might carry the chicken
I worry about your thought processes…
*steps further away*
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis.
Not only will you get AIDS you’ll get Bird flu virus and be pooped on by that brird (not misspelled check the new reporter fail)
(perhaps new reporter should be old news)
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis..
lollll
That chicken is really OLD, ¡18 years!
18 in chicken years is only about 3 weeks
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis.. . ..srsly
I wonder if the chicken would make me a sandwich when we’re done?
“No, kitty, this is my potpie!”
*Pokes pie*
*Doesn’t pay*
better check your credit card statement
Did you use gloves? Or a ladder perhaps? Were there nuts on the cake? What kind of cake was it, a Cheezy Poof cake? Ooooh, I know… it’s a Bu-Cake-E!!
Made with butt water.
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis.. . … liek, srsly qweerz ar teh first on teh bus loltfsdvbsb
From my experience, chicken salad makes the best sandwich.
I’d toss that sandwich.
*makes himself a sandwich*
Ok, dilly…this made me *SNORT* in a most undignified way.
With extra mayo?
protein shots cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis.
Animal sex WIN
Who said we had to have sex with it.
You poor sick minded little boy
Exactly, we just have to “megaflirt” with it. It’s not compulsoryanimalsex.xxx
Better than, “Anydudelldoo”!
Thanks LB, I just wet myself a little
*sneaks off to change panties*
*bows*
Will you email me that story? So I can DELETE it.
Just give me your address, so I can IGNORE it.
*deletes, with evil grin*
*pays no attention, with ignorant grin*
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis.srs story. rmabling figs.
tl:dr
Ditto!
*hides*
cancer sone here. wathc out for nazis!!1
A popular hang out spot for Prince Albert to look for Jacob’s ladder.
… just choke it…
Yeah, but it’s funny
the less-popular sister site of Lolcats
Ok, this has been making me laugh all day.
That chiken is tasty!
Eat mor chiken in Chick-fil-a-tio?
(DO NOT WANT — not even as the chicken strips)
mmm… chicken strips.
Doesn’t the chicken have to put some clothes on before it can strip?
Scraping the Failbarrel…
for chickenscratch…
I love that the chicken’s name is Jorge.
Haha, I also noticed that. Maybe he wants a sex change?
maybe he’s a chickboy
wow. chickens sure have evolved! they’re using dating sites now!
He’s online right now, if you’re interested…
♪ He rocks in the tree-top all a day long
Hoppin’ and a-boppin’ and a-singin’ the song ♪
He can’t be in the tree top, he’s flightless. Which is a good thing because he can’t poop in your mouth. Although I think HoneyStarr might be into that sort of thing.
He may be flightless, but I think somebody put him up to it. Might have been every little swallow, every chickadee, every little bird in the tall oak tree. And/or the wise old owl, and the big black crow, flapping them wings sayin’ go bird go. I’m just sayin’.
(though I hear he can’t really carry a tune and he singa poor)
He’s a chicken, not a robin.
And I assume he’s not a bat man, either — just drawn to advertise that way.
Jorge is a whore!
Hey!
Gobble Gobble Hey!
(that one goes out to Jorge Ramone and his punk ass mohawk comb over)
Beat on the brat, beat on the brat, beat on the brat with a… no, I just can’t rhyme that one.
*hangs up (nonexistant) musical talent*
It would be wrong to beat your bird with a bat — bats are mammals.
and mammals are people too.
*rhymes instead*
….With a baseball bat!
Sorry, but I think Joey already used that one.
*Pays homage to the late and great*
Ok then..
…..with a welcome mat?
How about…
… with a three ton cat?
With a builder’s hat!
Hammer time!
(*now wishes he hadn’t touched that*)
I smell a rat
In a laundromat!
Old fail is old.
That c0ck is fowl!
Yeah, but just imagine the face on the guy who has to use a chicken for his userpic.
You’re right, Eddy… although I suspect you already know. Something to do with a mirror?
I bet he has egg on his face.
That was eggsactly the sort of poor yoke I would expect from you Fuzz.
I knew someone would crack a yolk or two… shell I see if you’re all white?
feel free range to do so!
That one was eggscruciatingly bad
aaaw the shell with it.
I suspect that niether the chicken or Honeystarr are actually 18 years old.
I’m a little concerned that the chicken is “online now!”.
They’ll put anything on a webcam nowdays.
Atleast i have chicken!
Do you have an atlas?
Are you claiming you’re a worldly woman at last?
Do you have a flag?
No flag, no country, therefore no atlas to be had.
You just made that rule up…didn’t you?
I’m assuming it’s backed up with a gun though.
How did you know? Bang! Rat-a-tat-tat
at last, alas, a lass atlasless
*shrugs*
“It’s ok, I know where I’m going. I could get there with one eye closed.”
Some studies have shown that directions given by women tend to work better than those given by men, when it comes actually to getting persons to where they wish to go.
.
Men tend to emphasize cardinal directions (north, south, etc.) and distances. Women tend to emphasize landmarks. Landmarks tend to be of more practical usefulness.
It’s good to have scientific proof why I’m full of hatred for Mapquest.
All my life, I’ve lived in places where there was water to the east of me. Uppsala, Milwaukee, New York, Philadelphia–whenever I face north, there is water on the right. This gives me comfort, and a sense of continuity and direction.
Then I moved to the West coast.
I drove to the Oregon coast to visit my aunt one weekend. When the directions said, “Turn north on Highway 101,” I turned…left. Water on the right.
It took me 20 miles to figure out I was going the wrong way.
I know that sign! Don’t be embarrassed, it fooled me the first couple of times too.
(Pssst…guys…was there a sign in my story? Did I miss it? I AM horrible with directions, you know…)
Fool me once, shame on the Pacific ocean.
LMAO
i know the feeling! though in my case the water is kind of a secondary thing, being surrounded by desert- but having grown up in boston, i can’t fathom being east of downtown, but now i live east of Phoenix, i used to get turned around quite easily… i’ve been here 7 years now, so i’m finally getting used to it…
It’s a shame her avatar isn’t a cat. Then people would have a direct choice between the coc- actually you know what I’ll stop there.
yup… one of my favorite tee-shirts is a rooster and cat calling each other Chicken and P#$$y. Classic bad taste!
I would love to see a tee shirt with a rooster mounting a cat. You wouldn’t even need a caption.
It would sell a million shirts.
Chicken and Honey? Sounds like a win to me.
DON’T FORGET TO USE DUCT TAPE ON THE CHICKEN, OTHERWISE IT MIGHT BREAK!!!
You are exactly as hilariously perverted as my friends… it’s wrong I tell you, WRONG!
Thank you!
she’s got hot breasts… the chicken that is
plump, moist and delicious
*nom nom nom*
where’s Loz in all of this?
Then it is the only stupid comment that has ever been blocked here.
That’s not a fail. That chicken is the perfect date for a person from Singapore. Now if she was from Tijuana she’d need to be matched up with a donkey.
Dated a lot of women from Tijuana, have you?
Going to make an ass of ourselves again?
Jorge is obviously another dumb cluck in search of a honey.
cute chick…
A CILF joke is just out of my reach. Which is probably a good thing.
that’s a mighty fine looking c0©k there.
Hahaha that’s from a porn site. Before a porn video loads, those “find your match” ads pop up haha
LOL “Singapore” Must be a Desperate Country
Lol, the man sucks !
Its real people!!!
Chicken use Internet!!! and soon they will eat us XD xD xD
hahaha someone is into internet porn :-X
lol kinky!
HMMMM chicken……HOT…..HMMMM
haha omg i saw this when i was on there
“He wears a disguise to look like human guys, but he’s not a man he’s a chicken-boo”
jorge
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD