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Cheezburger Network Blog
Looks like a car with paint rollers for wheels went through the area.
“Looks like a car with paint rollers for wheels went through the area.”
*CarS
And this is why we shouldn’t let women drive. women suffrage fail
A woman would not have made such a god-awful mess. This HAD to have been a man’s doing.
You’re a man’s doing
Your mom is a man’s doing. Actually, lots of them.
town bicycle win
Clearly, you need a whompa-ing.
Clearly, you need a squizan you you cleaver little girl you
Clearly, they let stevie wonder make the lines…
If you put a “line”in front of Stevie Wonder he’d find it.
Have you seen Stevie Wonder’s awesome new piano?
Yeah, neither has he.
Blasphemy!
why does Helen Kellar play the Piano with one hand? So she can sing with the other
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
‘Cause she’s a woman.
this coming from a ‘Pretentious White Girl’…
Criticism Fail.
You need an irony supplement. Here’s a suppository.
mmmm…. suppository…
Yeah does it feel a touch warm?
Where has BOTW got to anyways?
Yeah, I miss the burnage. I’ve had to resort to drinking a teaspoon of straight Tabasco once a week for the past few.
Actually I kinda like that. nvm.
Haha, so a burn fail, is that a Scald? A Chill?
I propose a Toast…
*throws toast at PWG* A TOAST!
Pretentious White Girl: “I propose a Toast…”
.
That’s a rye remark.
(and so it starts…)
Just Gin and bear it.
I’ve made too many screwdriver jokes already (and not enough actual screwdrivers).
Hey, thanks, I love toast! *slathers it with bacon fat and marmalade*
I’d rather be a Stout defender.
Anyone for a Pale Fail Ale?
*stumbling home from a late night at the pub…*
Right…now whis-key goes to the front door again…?
I’m a bit late, but how do Gin and a black bear mix?
This is a rum line of comments, that’s for sure.
I think it would be very hazardous to combine the two, if y’ask me.
Drunk bears are way more entertaining
Whass Ursine babe? (hic)
book suppository! relevance fail!
proud to say ive driven this road its up in minnesota and cant you see its a woman fail TAN
ooh ooh me me me
Net Handle Whompa1: “town bicycle win”
.
Village idiot win
the only way a man could have done this is if he told a woman to do it but she didn’t want to. so then she would leave and sue the man for 1/2 of his worth and charge him for child support for kids she had slutting it up with the goddamn gardener. This would cause the man to get drunk and start painting roads in his drunken stooper. and even then the roads would come out wider and more luxurious
divorce court fail
Wow. I sense some bitterness here. *gives Whompa1 a cookie* does that help?
Stoopid stooper.
Sooper dooper!
Gary Cooper?
and a Storm Trooper??
Let me tell a story.
A man was in the hospital after a major accident. After a time, the doctor decided to call in the family to discuss options. “Well,” said the doctor, “At this point, there is only one option. We could try an experimental brain transplant. Now, a male brain will run you about $50,000, while a female brain will run at about $35,000.”
Several men in the room snicker, thinking they know why, however, one you ng lady, curious as to the difference asked, “Doctor, why are men’s brains so much more expensive then women’s?” to which the doctor replied, “Simple pricing practices. A woman’s brain has actually been used.”
Ok, you can stay!
Yes…we like you!
Pssst…. go back to First Aid Fail and read what raelalt said. It’s very eloquent. It’s right after your blinking.
Okey-doke.
*runs to look*
You know, sexism isn’t acceptable when you do it, either…
Ooh. Fair point. Sorry about that.
It’s more of a defense mechanism. When you live every day having people treat you as an inferior and a second-class citizen, as an imbecile and an incompetent, as unworthy of respect or equity…you tend to want to throw it back. But you DO have a good point–that doesn’t make it right.
Okay. As long as you apologized. I personally can’t stand prejudice of any kind. As a straight white male living in the southern US, I guess that makes me kind of an oddball.
Why thankies~! *bows*
That, sir is a WIN.
Nah, that’s just simple truth.
The simple joy of being a gal.
May also be that men’s brains are a rarity.
Just curious, do you have several cats?
It’s a long, long way to the tip of a rarity.
But my, ah, head’s right there.
You base this sexist opinion on what statistic? (All numbers suggest men are more accident prone and more likely to drive aggressively.) How does a woman’s right to vote have anything to do with operating a vehicle?
You know, when you post misogynistic crap like this, all I see is “Waaah, why won’t women have sex with me?” Maybe, here’s a thought, it’s because you don’t respect them?
*clap clap clap*
Why are you giving Seth the clap?? We LIKE him!!
Yeah… I’m sure Seth wouldn’t like to have the clap.
Here’s my idea: Guys do dumb stuff. Girls do dumb stuff. Get used to it.
As an absolutely perfect person who has never done a single dumb thing in my life, I take offense at that.
heh — a perfect Rogue
respecting women gets you female friends, doesn’t get you laid.
you gotta be an asshole to get laid, grow up seth.
HAHAHA, look in the mirror, i think you’ll find the less repect and the more indifference you display will give you better results, unless you want sex of fat librarians.
Suffrage means the right to vote, not the right to drive a car. Unfortunately, morons have both of those rights, worst of all they have the right to post on failblog.
The semantic Poice has arrived!
Quick, everybody act like you know what you’re talking about!!
What’s a Poice?
A previous fail.
A rock band. I’m surprised you’ve never heard of them. They sang “Messag in a Botte” after all…
Don’t feed the troll.
*feeds PWG instead*
Yay! I feel so loved.
*nom nom nom*
its a test road look at the paint on the far right
You failed our reading the comments test.
_____
stupid sexist bastard
Ummm, she/he said “looks like A car…..” not “looks like a carS”
This a test road for traffic paint you idiots. Does anybody read anymore?
No.
tl;dr
I want to know where they test it like that, though. In my state they have nice test patches on major highways. Never heard of a whole test road.
The University of Oklahoma owns a lot of land. There are some old roads on an unused part of campus where they either practice painting lines or use it to empty the remaining paint in their trucks. It’s even crazier than this picture because it has both white and yellow paint.
I wish I could read, but I’m illiterate.
Are you a bilingual illiterate? You can’t read in two languages?
Hmm… good point! I guess that makes me an omnilingual illiterate.
I can’t read in any language!
Sorry you are sick but now I am stuck in an endless loop.
This statement is a lie.
No, the cake is a lie.
I’m making a note here, huge success.
This is what I’m talking about.
Let me help you Raelalt.
*Inserts code*
if (i = 1337) then
JOOTS
end if
A classic case of “white line fever” I thought.
no, not really, no. welcome to the 21th century.
albino skid marks
what?
what what what in the assholes
WAKE UP PPLZ!!!!
ITS PAINT TEST STRIPES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
poles
Czechs
Lyres
Pants on fires
Or on a mission…
….impossible
Not impossible. Improbable.
lickable!
Like a free meat snack.
Do you like your meat snacks wrapped or unwrapped?
Depends on who’s sharing.
Well, I have a meat snack I’d love to share
Actually, several.
o.O
*blush*
Hey, it’s not what you think.
(Although it could be if you want . . . )
Oh… *blushes harder*
so there is a finite possibility. So Possible.
Now all we need is a Brownian motion inducer (preferably a nice hot cup of tea), an atomic vector plotter, and a Bambleweeny 57 Sub-Meson Brain.
Oh, and two leads to suspend in the Brownian motion inducer.
∫éñ∂ ø√é® and I’ll induce some motion…
:O
WOOO!!! Hitchikers guide to the galaxy win!
*activates the Infinite Improbability Drive*
To Magrathea~!
Hmmm, Sorry, All I have is a flux Capacitor.
aaArgh! *exerts willpower again in attempt to prevent self from making b3nd 0ver joke*
Your capacity for restraint is impressive.
I had an ex like that, it was hell getting the knots untied.
A mission from God?
A blessing! A blessing from the Lord!
A sign! He has given us his shoe! It is a sign that we, too, should hold up our right shoe and praise him!
Praise Juses!
All praise Brian~!
*holds up a gourd*
“F*ck off!”
“How shall we f*ck off, o Lord?”
In Soviet Russia, Polacks make fun of you.
In Soviet Russia, you make Jokes laugh.
In Failblog, jokes make laugh you don’t!
Please not be cross posting Engrish-funny comments. Thank you daily. pp Paedo-panda
-sigh-
I miss the Paedo-panda.
I’d like to see the photo taken five minutes earlier of the Top Gear presenters trying to paint the road.
O.o
Haha, nice one!
Eh, on second thought, maybe it wasn’t them. Had it been the TG boys, the road would be cracked and in pieces, and there would be a jet engine and an overturned forklift in the middle of it. On fire.
Ha. Someone must’ve been drinking on the job.
You’re on the job
Your mom’s on the job.
Tracy emin strikes again
Drivers Ed torture road. “Stay in your lane!”
It would be kind of funny to take a driver’s ed student on some nightmare course (like in “License to Drive”).
*overtakes*
*underpasses*
“underpass…” must… not… make… b3nd…. 0ver… joke…. yaaaaargh….. *exerts willpower*
*cackles madly*
*willpower fail* gnnn….I’ll….giveyouan….underpass…..aargh goddamnit!
*snerk*
White Stripes Blvd.? Does that road head to Wichita?
These are the new brail roadways for blind drivers.
um, what brail have YOU seen???
Brail Fail
Rhyme Time!
It’s not a fail.
It’s the road painters’ training site.
This is why you wait to smoke that joint until after work.
Or if you smoke the joint, be sure that you can handle your pot before doing something ridiculous.
Ummm, smoke that crack?
Unless, you work at marijuana quality control and aren’t sleeping or eating on the job.
It would seem that someone should take the b-lane for this.
Not really a fail. This is a stretch of road where the local Road authority paints test strips.
In Canada, one of these areas can be seen on the 401 Highway when travelling from Toronto to Kingston.
We probably need another forum to discuss what the picture is really about.
The test strips on the 401 are testing how properly applied the paint reacts to traffic.
This test has tire marks from multiple vehicles driving S-curves through fresh paint. Maybe they were testing wet paint interactions with tires.
Could it be training for paint truck operators? The paint truck wasn’t driving very straight for many of the runs.
That’s what I said! Some dude was all up and hating on me for it. I just speak the truth, you know?
where’s mr. sausage? Need some 1 to masturbate! *masturbates*
btw in soviet RUSSIA the roads driving YoU!
Roads? Where we’re going, we don’t need roads. (In Soviet Russia, there is no future to go back to.)
There is no spoon.
Comments won’t spoon below this level.
But spoons will comment below this level.
Like Me!
Oh, fork off.
My elixier of Knife won’t let me…
All these cutlery jokes, I just cant take it.
I’m just going to have to ladle for a while
Have a knife time.
Make sure it’s …grater… than the last one. Sorry, I ran out of ideas.
I think we’d better cut it out.
with scissors?
I could sure go for a screwdriver.
I could sure go for a screw…
Here, PWG, have 3 more.
*hiccup* gee, thanksh, Llllozzy old pal! *hiccup*
glug
glug
glug
*headdesk*
Bo “I could sure go for a screw…”
.
Damn Bo, that is sure one strange fetish you have there.
There’s a boner joke in here somewhere.
Don’t worry, it’ll pop up eventually.
I think it just did.
*masturbates*
Sieve we care!
*spoons pob*
My name is thepowerofblue, and I approve this message.
*spoons Loz*
Hey, no, I wana be the spooner, not the spoonee!
And the roonerspism
I’m like Burger King: have it your way.
Is that not Subway?
No way!
Nope, Subway is “Eat Fresh. Make of that what you will.
It’d be funny if it was “Subway: Make of it what you will”.
*hangs head in shame*
I forgot the quotation mark.
*pouts*
I think the blog monster ate it. It’s eaten about three of my posts so far.
No it was funny! I do love a good subway
Ah… I’m lovin’ it.
NO! YOU ONLY THINK YOU DO!
Mmmm mmmm good.
cue the crash dummy…
testing, 1,2,3.
.
(see what I did there? recoveries I haz dem.)
I have nothing to say.
You have no idea how much I related to that song.
Neo? Is that you?
your tax dollars hard at work
You’re hard at work…
*masturbates*
so’s your mom
*masturbates* at ur mom
“Your mama’s so fat
How fat is she?
Your mama is so big and fat that she can get busy
with 22 burritos, when times are tough,
I’ve seen her in the back of Taco Bell with handcuffs”
Hey, I recognize that road… it’s Picasso street over in Cuba.
More like Mondrian Avenue.
WIN
Thank you for remebering Mondrian
most don’t they only remember Picaso, but you, my friend are a true aficionado
Mondrian, the one with all the squares? Some filled with color? Contemporary of DeStille? That Mondrian?
yup, one of my favorite artists
*remembers art history class well*
I like that whole era.
i see you are cultured as well. maybe it’s just people in Pennsylvania that don’t know anything about art.
I went to art school. This kind of explains my current job situation.
I feel ur pain there. Music student. *hi five*
It’s a drag that the education avenues that are the most interesting
are also the least profitable.
.
My GF got a degree in Art History but then had to go back and get a Masters in something else (Library Science) so that she could find employment.
I have to go back to school too. And oddly enough Library Sciences are wwhere my intrest lie. Go figure.
Library Science? Is that an actual degree course?
It’s what it takes to be a librarian. You can be a library clerk without the degree, but the librarian gets paid more.
I want to be a librarian. But right now, I would just like a job.
Very few schools offer it but yes it is.
.
She went to San Jose State (CA-US) for hers. Worked out well for her to, retired recently after 30 years working for the City of San Jose.
GF got a job as a library clerk after getting her Art History degree and realized that the librarians got all the fun duties.”I want that” she thought and went back to school.
.
I was a theater major…went to NYU. Didn’t take long to figure out that I needed something else for a day job!
I was a religion/philosophy major. Talk about eminently unemployable.
*high fives and commiserates*
When I went back to college after a rather long hiatus (homework got too much in the way of my partying at first) I aimed towards Political Science. Thankfully I came to my senses and got on the Information Science track. That was
the very early 80’s. It was a very wise choice, one of the few that I’ve actually made.
Speaking of jobs…I should go and do mine. I have a mountain of papers to grade today. See you all later!
*smooches*
What the hell, abstract?
Hell Hath No Curry like a dillyfeltya creamy, cheesed & sconed.
She Hirst my feelings.
haha, my laundry bag is painted in a mondrian-esque pattern.
Would that make me da champ… or Duchamp?
You are a fountain of wit.
Dah, dah.
This is a road for the new Mini cars..!!
Smart cars
Mini cars aren’t always smart you know..
Dumb comments.
It’s that a van Gogh?
Only if it’s where the vans go.
Duh! This is clearly a surealist art win!
Or the guy was high off the fumes.
mmmm… paint fumes…
I recon the workmen just had too much paint and didn’t want to take it back to the yard.
Dont’ EVER reckon a workman!
But I reckon you may beckon them at will
I prefer becking for bacon. Especially crispy bacon.
BECKONING, even. I fail at spelling that >.<
NEW WORD!!
*enters it into the Failblog dictionary*
I prefer two turntables and a microphone.
Laurent Garnier likes crispy bacon AND has the Technics.
I like makin’ bacon… Does that count?
Mmm. Bacon.
*spreads leftover bacon fat on her toast* ahhh.
Sure, why not?
*offers to cook PWG some eggs with the leftover bacon fat*
I love cooking, it’s a socially acceptable excuse to play with knives and fire >:D
Fire is cool. I like fire.
*chuckles maniacally*
Welcome to the club!
*offers PWG a flaming club*
Awesome! Do I get knives, too?
Sure!
*hands PWG a set of steak, paring and X-Acto knives*
Close, but I’d say this is a private road that contractors use to test road marking vehicles.
No Fail.
Deja vu
Deja vu.
What the hell just happened?
Somebody had too much to drink.
Ready for me to ruin it? This is a small, isolated strip of road used by a DMV somewhere to test the machines that paint lines on other roads. There’s one like it near my hometown, and there’s probably one like it close to yours. It’s interesting and still kinda funny, if not a little creepy looking, but it’s not a fail.
gthb
Sorry I ruined your life.
THIS is why I had the new White-out strip dispensers. They suck…. almost as much as the old White-out bottles with tiny brushes. White-out, in general, sucks. And, so does almost any white girl (God bless ‘em.).
Hey. *smacks killerwit in the head*
Which one?
Good question. They’re both hard.
WIN!
Thanks for noticing. ::)
*Tosses Killerwit a hand grenade* *ducks*
*laughs as hand grenade harmlessly falls at his feet because the pin was never pulled* Imaginary assassination FAIL
this roads up for auction in new york for one point five million dollars
*dances like an egyptian*
*dances like an Irishman*
You might want to stop that if you want to get laid.
good if you want to get drunk though!
Really? I dance like an Irish girl all the time and it doesn’t get me drunk.
But it is poetry in motion.
So is throwing a chicken.
. . . No, wait, that’s “POULTRY in motion”. Sory.
I would think, rather, that getting drunk is an effective means of acquiring the ability to dance like an Irish person…
Precisely!
What? You’ve never heard of rohypnol?
*sings* Let me tell you ’bout a girl I know….
Hallelujah…
You saw her bathing on the roof?
Perv!
No. It wasn’t me. No one saw me. You can’t prove a thing.
.
But if it was, I would have to say she uses too much bubble bath.
Obscures the view.
It’s a good thing she cut your hair.
And tied you to her kitchen chair. Serves you right.
*dances like a Bratenboy*
*dances like an idiot*
*trys to spot difference*
*Dances like Elaine*
No, really, I do.
Oh…oh dear. That made me lol.
Do you even do the thing with the thumbs…?
No, but I really can’t dance. Unless I am very very drunk. I don’t like to get very very drunk, so I don’t do a lot of dancing.
See, I’m not terribly coordinated. A wee bit on the clumsy side. It all comes from the NF.
I can sorta, kinda relate to that–but not for dancing. I have a deal where sometimes my hands get really, really weak and I end up fumbling everything. Drives me NUTS!!
B3nd O√3r and I’ll drive me nuts.
HA! Looks like a pissed off Employee.
Either fired or about to quit haha! Sticking it to the man!
Or drunk at work, who knows.
I work for a Dept of Transportation for a medium-sized city. The driveway to our Operations Division looks like this… gotta practice somewhere…
Raelalt, join us here.
I couldn’t reply at First Aid Fail ’cause you got the last comment!!
We didn’t mean to offend and will try to not do it again.
No offense really, in fact when I was writing it I had no idea it was as harsh as it sounded. When I started it was meant as a tongue-in-check response but then I started to like the sound of my boring pedantic style of writing and went
off on a tangent. And being the end of the day I hit {enter} without re-reading
it objectively (I so wanted to get on my bike and away from my desk).
.
I got home and started to think about it and went “OH SHIT” I really came off as a total ass (as opposed to an asse which would have been ok).
.
But for dog’s sake please don’t hold back on the comments, I really
don’t have as thin a skin as it sounded like. And I do need an occasional
roasting (dragon style) to keep me in line.
.
-D. “raelalt” F.
I did say we would TRY to not do it again! We are at failblog after all. It’s bound to happen again. I get fairly defensive too, so not a biggie.
I did like your limerick!
:hugs:
Fare enuf, and I promize to give you all several of opportunitie’s to do so.
(heh heh heh heh)
:hugs-right-back-at-ya:
you spelled “jive” wrong
Damn! Thanks for catching that.
*hugs raelalt*
You have NO idea how relieved I am. I hated the idea that you were pissed at me.
I didn’t see any malice in your original comment. It was a little out of left field, ’twas all.
The white zone is for FAILing only. There is no FAILing in a red zone.
The red zone is for immediate FAILing only. There is no FAILing in a white zone.
Dammit Betty, don’t start in with your white zone shit again.
DOWN WITH THE BLUE ZONES!
Reference fail! (try google, Airplane, Script)
Reference fail on your end too. (Try Google, Blue Zone, Tiberium Wars)
And since when does C&C have anything to do with roads? Double reference fail. Up for 3? Bring your cup!
There are plenty of roads in C&C. Just look at any of the maps.
Answer fail. I asked you want C&C had to do with roads, I didnt ask if there were roads in C&C. Again you fail to understand the concept of “CONTEXT”. Engrish fail. Stay in school.
Hey, I’m just playing off the whole “zones” thing here.
http://www.awesomefilm.com/script/airplane.txt
Read the lines that say voicelady and voiceman.
It will all become clear. It is an older movie but classic none the less.
C&C? Are you people talking about the mixers for tonight’s party?
I’ll bring the B&B!
Bed and Breakfast? I guess that could come in handy for when we all pass out!
Well, that would be nice, too, but I was thinking about THIS.
(clickie my name)
“I’m thinking of starting my own chain of Chair-Lunch-Dinners.”
-Mitch Hedberg
Now, now, children, be nice.
Funny, you don’t look Blueish….
That’s right. I’m red and black, and I fight for Nod.
OMG you are killing me here. Again you missed it. Its a spaceballs reference. Stop while you are behind. Catchup fail.
Well, I’ve never seen Spaceballs.
CRITICISM FAIL.
NEVER SEEN SPACEBALLS!!!
CULTURE FAIL!
Nay, merely a deprived child. Poor thing.
More like a “depraved” child.
Teehee!
I have seen Young Frankenstein and Blazing Saddles, though – andI prefer Young Frankenstein to Blazing Saddles.
Well at least there isnt a taste fail. Bravo on that one.
Cheers!
Although, when it comes down to it, I’m not sure what’s wrong with responding to a reference with a reference to something else. It just adds to the general winnage.
Its perfectly acceptable, the only contingency is that you must let the first reference run its course before the introduction of another, otherwise you end up on a Tolstoy-like montage of references which in the end just aren’t funny at all. So it becomes reference fail instead of endless reference win.
Good point.
I am referring to this.
You know, in space, no one can hear you use caps lock.
Aaaaahhh, Killerwit…we’ve missed you!
(Next time our aim will be better! :p )
You just gave me the warm fuzzies.
(I love it when you shave.) ::)
*grin!*
Well, most people don’t show those in space.
looks like the guy who was supposed to paint the road found out, that his wife was cheating on him with his boss
21st… OMFG! I have to go drive there! lol
Warning Spoiler Below
.
.
.
.
(psst: This is an abandoned or private road that is used to test the paint sprayers that are mounted on the paint truck. Every organization that sprays the lines on the roads has such a section of road for just that purpose.)
.
(raelalt wishes HE had a TMI moniker for posts such as the above)
(you spelled harmonica wrong)
(you spelled spieled wrong)
Scheiße! Danke für die fangfrage.
Gesundheit.
Besser wie krankheit!
Besser *als* Krankheit
What, now we have grammar corrections in German!
Diversity win through grammar fail?
Someone failed to color in between the lines
You know that they are having trouble getting enough books for the Bush Presidential Library that will be built once he is out of office?
.
They can’t find very many that he hasn’t colored in already.
.
Another problem the Bush library will have to face: the fact that there are only so many copies of “My Pet Goat” available.
Which would be placed in the “Sexuality” section.
You guys keep pounding Bush… and so will I in my own homonymic way.
^ homonymphonic maniac
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!
eye test fails
Last
O rly?
so it never occurred to anyone that this is photoshopped??
*****************************************
Now you are cordoned off.
dude! — you diss’d ‘cord!
.
(it was an all-star admirable type thing, too)
Wow. You lose.
cokehead roadpainter win
It’s obvious, the aliens did it, just like the crop circles
Not a fail. Steve Jobs wasn’t even born when that happened.
Oh, sure, break 300 Communication Fails without me. *grumbles*
EPIC FAIL!!!
YOUR ALL WACK!!!
Well, we’ve got all this extra road paint. Might as well make use of it…
i wonder what the speed limit on this road is?
Where am I supposed to drive?
No Way ! That can’t be real !
This is where they practice.
If any of you had a brain you would relize that they are using this section of road-way as a test site for road paint. As a woman I know!!!
Icen revenant ate them.
… with relizh
I bet the little painty truck things were having drag races and forgot about the paint (nods) That must be it
WTF
clearly a test road for line marking vehicles, but you still be like wtf?!?
I’m guessing this is a road for incredibly thin cars. Right?
omg
thats just a road where they test the durability for different sorts of paint solutions.. its nothing unusual and no fail