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Suicide Bomber needed?
No they are looking for suicidal terrorist this way… (Anti-terrorist program)
or: No they want to crash into the terrorists WTC…(on 11-9-2009)
not cool dude not cool
Too true, Afghanistan is hot in September. Should go for February.
These boxes are too fat.
Wasted comment to make even smaller less useful boxes below this one.
they’re just doing there part in making a healthier community.
THEY’RE just doing THEIR. and sending suicidal teens away to see scenes of violence and gore does not make them come back healthy……………
makes suicidal people usefull at least
anyway there are suicidal people and they commit it. maybe they will not fight but let the enemy kill them. not a god investment then…
ok im joking. but maybe it could make them proud of themselves for serving the nation, or show them the life is good here.
but yes their mind would be more in trouble and chances of success are not the best we could have by other suicide prevention means…
(reflexion not finished… lol)
true~
Likely the best therapy for 90% of “troubled teens”. I know several completely hopeless brats that actually became adults in just 6 weeks. Boot camp will “straighten-out” most attitude problems (but not all, obviously).
A small percentage of recruits ever actually see firefights. PTSD is another issue entirely & will screw-up the most well-adjusted among us.
oooh!!! *masturbates*
Girlfriend FAIL
Comment WIN!
Owned.
Yeah… because no one with a girlfriend ever masturbates.
i masturbate on my girlfriend all the time.
disgusting.
i masturbate MORE OFTEN now that i have one.
Lars and the Real Girl
ok, lol. admit.
Honesty FAIL…
or possibly recruiting win…
first first.
owned.
Truth in advertising win?
Suicidal teens can now kill themselves . . .by going to war!
War? Hah! What is it good for?
Absolutely nothin’.
Say it again now.
I thought he said “say it again y’all”. It’s not as funny now!
You may be right. I may be crazy. But it just may be a lunatic you’re lookin’ for.
suicidal? serve your country!
this is how you kill yourself… and I’m only going to show you one time
LMAO ><
LMAO. Yes
Turn out the lights!
Don’t try to save me.
I’m getting suicidal from all the awful Billy Joel. I’m joining the military.
*salutes private*
Saluting privates!!???
*masturbates*
^ Captain Oblivious.
No! Not my spotlight in the corner.
Excuse me, did someone drop their religion over here?
Yes! That’s mine. Phew, thanks
I found Jesus… he was behind the couch the entire time.
That sneaky little bastard!
I know… he forgot to wash and ruined the upholstery.
it’s dark in here
I hope you never get out.
A good attorney can get you out of anything… even the darkness. Chances are they can get you compensation as well for the mental anguish and stress of being in the dark and being stripped of your ability to see.
turn out the lights, dont try to save me.
you may be wrong but for all i know you may be right.
*kills self*
Did I mention that I’ve seen Billy Joel in concert?
Oh, honey:)
Says a coward that’s never been to war. I’ve been to TWO, and I can tell you, it’s damn fun! Hippies = FAIL.
Err… it’s a song, douche.
And hippy stereotype fail.
That explains SO much…!
That it’s a song or that ghouck is a douche?
I love the smell of facepalm in the morning.
lol
Burn of the week win!
Ah, the cultural mores of a jar head… how very, very quaint…
Pop culture fail from the cannon fodder…
how do you know he or she’s a jar head?
It’s pretty obvious ghouck is a jar head of the first order.
He is a douche-nozzle.
Maybe we can donate him to science. After all, there are some things that even rats won’t do.
Not a bad idea, since there’s nothing a scientist won’t do to a rat. He should be studied. And held somewhere where he can’t harm society at large.
He’s a super douche… super douche… he’s a super douche… super douchebag!
That’s what my last boyfriend said!;)
Rick James reference win!!
Realising there’s an earlier Rick James quote FAIL
Absolutely NOTHING!!!
Timeliness Fail.
But still bears remembering.
What are said bears remembering?
Oh, bother.
*recalls barings all weekend long*
Get your bearings, fuzzy.
*looks round*
Do you have them?
Yeah, two of them. And they’re not for you. So skip along, teddy bear, to find different balls to play with
And fuzz goes ballistic.
I point-blank love the smell of fuzz’s gunpowder in the morning.
*Kills Fuzz*
OH NO YOU DIDN’T.
Go away, and take that retarded emoticon with you.
Ignore this sam fellow, he’s just trollin’.
He’s trollin’, I’m HATIN’
I’m ridin’ dirrrrty
LOL … I’m lovin’ y’all.
Sadness surrounds thee.
Ask not what those Outsyde do to you –
ask what you do on the insyde.
Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad…
When you’re chewing on life’s gristle
Don’t grumble, give a whistle…
Always look on the Light syde of life…
War is good for getting rid of Emo Teens
Late abortions are good for getting rid of you.
Retort WIN
corpse disposal effeciency win
that’s.. wow. Talons. You’re right. but it’s sooooooo wrong.
FIST FITS?;>
mmm, I know that!
*masturbates*
‘Cuz suicide is painless…
but it brings on many changes…
Yeah, these recruits may well need to refer to a Mobile Army Surgical Hospital!
Emo recruits + scalpels = field surgeon?
Makes sense to me.
Never saw M*A*S*H fail.
Guilty as charged.
Though to be fair, Hawkeye was rather emo at times.
They can cut other people instead of themselves. Win-win!
Doctor Alan Alda will provide therapy.
alcoholic surgeons win.
Therapy? Would be Dr. Sidney Freeman, Alda was a surgeon on the show.
therapy is not always mental, there can be physical therapy, and hawkeye was known for getting physical…
I know. But Alan Alda was the only actor I could think of off the top of my head…
Therapy?
*grinds teeth*
(anyone?)
ground teeth? no thank you. I prefer coffee.
*sigh* nobody gets it.
It’s your nervous titch that’s throwing people.
titch?! *masturbates*
No rapists please
music reference win.
PHEW! *hugs*
*idea lightbulb*
OH!!!
So that’s what M*A*S*H stands for!
:blush:
Well, at least all this time on FAIL Blog is adding to my general knowledge of things.
If this is where you get your general knowledge from… I feel for you
education is a master of disguise…
if i had a penny for everything i learned from monty python, i’d have £5.63
Wow! That’s more than I have in my pocket! I think MP has taught me £2.27
That’s…what? About $-0.45 U.S.?
Hahaha. It’s funny yet tragic
that sign is for British pounds not lira.
Nice try, but it’s actually used for Lira too
context madame. no one thinks you’re Italian.
The Italians don’t even use Lira anymore…
*fails to get your joke…*
Yeah, was gonna say. The Lira is keput, gone, went the way of the Dodo, extinct. The Lira is no more. For all of you folks who don’t keep up with current events within the last ten years, Europe has formed a “Union” and their imaginative currency invention was to make the “Euro” dollar.
a) Some countries still have a currency called the lira, such as Turkey.
b) Not all EU countries use the Euro; for example, the UK.
c) It’s not the “Euro dollar”, just the “Euro”.
yeah, but turkey doesn’t call it the lira…
it’s the “new turkish lira” because of all the inflation,
they just rounded everything up, and printed bigger bills.
It’s abbreviated ytl, and pronounced ye-te-leh. (roughly)
Foreign sister win.
Yes, dear. I know.
ADDS, mind you, ADDS.
Applied Digital Data Systems??
Didn’t get that one…. :-S
Disofficer attention, attention deficit disorder, what were you saying hi.
I think he meant ADD, but his mind wandered and he lost track after 3 letters.
*snickers” (NOT deep fat fried)
Yeah. Well, it’s hard to get a joke that isn’t really a joke.
“Adds” as in addition, dude(ette?), not an acronym.
If this is where anyone gets their general knowledge, I fear for the earth’s future. Now, if it were genital knowledge….
Genital knowledge?
*masturbates*
You’re both that creepy old man at the Christmas party.
Hmm…Let me call Radar ORLY.
you take it
or leave it
it’s just my life
… No it’s not. >.>; Death is painful.
Are you absolutely sure?
I don’t think any one would know.
That was kind of my point.
good
Well, I don’t wanna find out via suicide! >.>;
Pedo Bear disagrees
4th -.-
Suicidal teens welcome!
It brings on many changes
“Emo Forces Career Center”.
Bring your cuttin’ knives, you’re gonna need ‘em!
Bring “Modest Mouse” records to lower morale.
And your seppuku practice katanas.*
_____
*available if you act to fail now from the Shop At Home Network.
seppku practice katanas: impale your face when you least expect it.
An ‘emo’ joke from fuzz? *shakes head* I expected more from you!
It’s just a Patriot Act.
Your pacifism is very effective, though; you really are quite disarming.
I got an ocean’s worth of pacific.
You’re going to need a lot of Deepends ® .
Keep going (and going) on like that and I’ll go off it.
Fuzz marches to the beat of a different drummer–a little pink bunny drummer, to be exact.
Duracell win! Duracell ALWAYS win…
um… i can’t say i ever heard of the duracell bunny… though i have seen the energizer bunny
…you sure about that?
Bunny, not rabbit.
we made quiet a piramide…
Dammit, Avis! You owe me a new keyboard.
And a new Diet Coke. :p
Failblog fail: Google for suicidal teens welcome museumofhoaxes
I was gonna say it had to be a hoax without knowing the site. My friend was kicked OUT of the army for being suicidal!
If I say “photoshop” and give a reference link, is that better than just saying “photoshop”? http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/photo_database/image/suicidal_teens_welcome/
fialbolg feil
A video clip of the Simpsons episode behind the idea for this pic is here:
.
http://hotair.com/archives/2006/11/12/video-the-simpsons-salute-the-lazy-and-uneducated/comment-page-1/
As if it’s not obvious. Failblog Googling FAIL
Obviously nobody saw that episode of ‘The Simpsons.’
That doesn’t proove this is a hoax, it just says it probably is and gives instructions on how it could have been done. It’s just as possible (though I admit much less likely) that a recruiter saw that Simpsons episode and thought, well that’s one more way to convince people to enlist.
.
Hell, if you are going to commit suicide, be productive with it.
.
Anyone know why its suicide and not autocide? I’ve never heard the prefix sui in any other words I don’t think.
Are you suggesting the word is sui generis?
.
“Auto” is Greek, while “sui” (of self) and “cidium” (a killing) are Latin.
I like how there’s handicapped parking.
It’s for the vets.
Is it recruiting for an animal war?
Social engineering win.
Handicapped parking fail.
Handicapped parking may indicate previous suicide fail
Haha. Agreed. Anyone who goes to war and dies should be given a Darwin award.
but that’s no creative death, is it? Beeing killed by a vending machine you tried to open is.
LOL. True.
Or juggling grenades. Very creative, very funny.
Meh, I’ve seen better.
Shooting your mate with a sniper rifle from a range of six feet because you thought it was unloaded?
Cheney? Is that you?
Making him apologize for getting in the way?
Perhaps hormone exploitation win?
Wow….
Hey, as long as it is to bring freedom to the world….
oh no, still Fail
“Goddamnit, how come every time Failbloggers think of something clever, the Simpsons already did it?”
South Park already did that one.
(I don’t wanna be a fuzzkill, but if you Google “Simpsons salute the lazy and uneducated”…)
“… Damnit, even the dumbest teenagers in the dumbest town in the dumbest state know better than to join the Army.”
Tell that to Palin’s kid!
(The earlier comments from poo and Antonymous’ posts above hadn’t yet appeared when I made this Google “Simpsons salute” suggestion — SO DON’T BE A FUZZKILLER.)
*kills fuzz*
damnit, I hate it when that happens
What have you been reincarnated as?
Fuzz on peach, perhaps?
He sure is peachy
*nibbles*
Would that count as cannibalism?
yes
I was thinking more along the lines of buzz on the absinthe.
Hehe, he does seem to buzz on it quite frequently, brother.
makes my concepts all glowy
so i can see ‘em in the dark
*illuminates*
that’s enlightening
Brilliant!
Gawd…I hope not a republican.
*gives friend Sara J the “I’m just kidding” wink*
We can only hope…
*winks, too*
Assuming Sara J’s actually a Republican and not just voting for McCain…
FUZZPALM! Oh wait, that means…
::masturbates::
Nice job, fairy hot lady.
hey what an idea! Counter-suicide bombing. WIN!
The Palestinians are at least putting their suicidal folks to use.
The Jewish Sicarii already did that one (“Remember the Masada!”)
mmm, chicken tikka masada.
Mmm, chicken.
*masterbates*
southpark did that one too. *brandishes nightstick*
This probably explains part of the spiked suicide rates among American soldiers lately.
Sadly not. The U.S. is making their military men and women suicidal, not recruiting them that way–suicide rates have jumped, a lot, since the Iraq war has started.
.
One quote from CNN via Google: “U.S. Army figures … show 2,100 soldiers tried to commit suicide in 2007.” And that may just be the enlisted personnel, not those who have since been discharged. There are recent estimates that suggest more U.S. soldiers have come home from Iraq and then killed themselves than have died in the actual fighting.
.
Talk about fail.
:s any form of war is an epic fail in my opinion.
yeah we should just let terrorist crash planes into all of our buildings fighting back is so FAIL
that’s one way to look at it… another way to look at it is life is risk, and some of us would prefer to live with that risk than have a government that lies to us to keep us “safe”
Tell me you’re not one of those people who thinks the war in Iraq has anything to do with 9/11?
Loz, you would not believe how many people here still buy into that bullshit, even after Bush himself came out and publicly admitted that the two were unrelated.
My family seems to think Bush is a direct line to God, but they STILL think that Iraq and 9/11 are related. I’ve asked them. They are strange.
Urgh. That’s terrifying. How can people be so ignorant to such a huge issue?
Iraq was never a threat. *facepalm*
It’s a matter of will. They CHOOSE to believe that. They also believe the earth was created in seven days, AND that every word in the bible is true. Even the parts that contradict each other.
I guess it’s easier to tell yourself that the war your government is perpetrating is a good thing for the country, than to face up to reality.
Similar case with the bible. Reality is too scary for some.
A concept that is both terrifying and incredibly sad.
Absolutely. Folklore is absolutely peppered with examples of how humans construct fictions to comfort themselves about their mortality and the fact that they are powerless in the face of the Master Discourse of authority
The bible is just one big folktale…just like the Greek and Roman myths, or the Popul Vuh. AND just like the stories people choose to believe about what our government is doing.
What gets me is the way it allows someone to act in a way they KNOW is wroong. Without feeling guilty.
Ok, that and the whole “God is Love” thing. Mmmhmm, ’cause it’s all about peace. Suuuurrre.
Ooooh…trying to apply a rational argument to an irrational concept…
*head asplodes*
Yeah, they seem to think I should be stoned to death and then tortured for eternity because I kiss girls…
Where’s the love there?!
Are you in Iran, Loz?
I doubt anyone with half a wit is in Iran right now, what with Bush’s desire to attack them.
Do you think hate crimes occur only outside our borders, BFF?
Given that I am possessed of a rational mind, I tend to drive myself nuts trying to figure out what the hell my family is talking about. The rational thing to do is to not spend much time with them. So I don’t see too much of them anymore. And I bring aleve with me when I do visit.
Thankfully I’m not plagued by an overly-religious family. I can imagine how frustrating that would be.
Some of the above points are why Zen folks tell stories which cannot be rationally dogmatized. They are instead intended to provoke immediate, experiential realization, and thereby a more compassionate sanity.
Again, TMI has said this before. But like profound myth and fokloric metaphor, if you take religious language literally, you are not taking it seriously enough.
I did not mean to imply that folklore has no value. A culture’s beliefs, history, morals, anxieties, aspirations, ideologies…they all shine through the stories and myths a culture creates. In fact, I often think there is more to be gained by reading folklore than by reading “history” (i.e., that which has been written by thems that won). Toni Morrison said that “history is written by the definers, not the defined”, but folklore is the voice of the people…the folk.
But that doesn’t change the fact that I still believe that the underlying ideas behind the religious language are created fictions designed for specific purposes, i.e. to gain control and obedience from a population, or as a way for the population to seek and find comfort from the unknown.
(I love discussions like this!)
It’s an “adverbial” thing; it’s all in the “how” we use and
relate to language.
.
Words and narratives can go either way — towards dogmatic ossified concepts that keep people from questioning, or towards heart-opening works of art that both express experiences of worth and wonder and at the same gesture towards them for others to experience and know directly for themselves.
.
It’s why Fuzz looks to keep his concepts, um, in soft focus.
.
That’s also why Fuzz has a special fondness for the Buddha, who said, “What I’m telling you is the way it is, folks, but, please, whatever you do, don’t take my word for it. Go look, and accept only that which you have found in your own experience to be wholesome and healthy and true.” (paraphrase, the Kalama Sutra).
My Humanities professor paraphrased that as “What ever you do, don’t go make a religion out of this!” Still makes me laugh.
sorry but their cause wouldn’t exist anymore by now if we’d thought with our brains instead of our balls. what we did by going in guns blazing was to give them the best recruitment drive they’ve had in decades. More than one way to fight sir.
Re: “fighting back is so FAIL” — actually IMHO it is, and especially when those of us in the U.S. have such a poor grasp of history and of how much our culture has scarred and offended others and created so much hatred towards us to begin with (the U.S., for instance, gave its support not so long ago to Saddam Hussein being in power).
.
But I hope it’s clear that was not the point of my own post.
.
Whatever one’s views on war and on what’s happened in Iraq — we need to take loving care of those whose hearts and minds have been mutilated by their personal experience of that horror. And we’re too often failing them. It’s a disgrace that any vet should have any problems whatsoever in getting attention and respectful, effective treatment when they come home.
Hear, hear.
well if this is all about 9/11 then maybe we should have attacked the country where most of the hijackers came from..Saudi Arabia! But noooo, you can’t attack my family friends, Bush said.
US terrorist war FAIL
Even the Bin Ladens are close family friends of the Bushes.
Agreed.
yes
Yes, it’s much better to be rolled over without resistance.
What did Iraq do to you? It’s an unprovoked war, and disgusting.
They didn’t comply with the rules they were bound by as a condition of their defeat in the FIRST war, stupid. Damn hippies, put down the bong and go learn something.
Did they find any WMDs? Oh that’s right, NO.
And the intelligence documents were forgeries to begin with, remember?
In all fairness, one cannot use the term “intelligence” when referring to the Bush administration.
Haha, true. Oh well, looks like ghoucktroll has fled, let’s celebrate our victory!
Mission Accomplished?
*poses on a carrier*
*Carries plastic turkey*
*does not comply with the rules*
How many attacks on US soil since we took the fight over seas? That would be ZERO the same number of things you’ve probalbly done FOR your country. But hey keep spouting off it’s cute.
Are we counting attacks by our own government on our freedoms?
How many attacks on US soil would there have been if the US didn’t invade Iraq?
Let’s see…what have I done for my country?
I’ve educated young men and women and taught them to think critically rather than to blindly accept manipulative propaganda without question.
I’ve worked on disaster relief teams to help people affected by Katrina–those same people abandoned by our own government and military for days on end.
I’ve volunteered in literacy programs, because our government has cut school budgets so much that our educational system is leaving our children completely unprepared for the global marketplace.
I’ve tutored international students in the English language and writing, so they can communicate their innovations and ideas more easily to we who can stand to learn from them.
What have you done?
Not to mention the education funding was cut because of the insane amounts of money spent on the ‘war’. What a pointless sacrifice.
I believe Bush has borrowed more money than all previous presidents combined.
Oh shit, Dragon is “an important person”. *Lowers eyes*
Dragon’s just a real person.
*raises heart*
“real”, c’mon fuzz, what is “real” anyways. . ?
*visualizes whirled tara*
Green or White?
Did I say I was “an important person”??
*reads last post”
Nope. I certainly did not. I merely answered a question and posed one of my own. My point was merely that there are more ways to serve your country than being in the military.
If you inferred something that I in no way meant or implied, that’s not my problem.
Besides. “Important” people wouldn’t mistake a quotation mark for an asterisk.
*gets out the herring*
We switched to a shellacked halibut.
Avis…how by all that is holy and sacred did you nest in there???
When I replied it was, for some reason, at the bottom of the page. I really don’t know how it did what it did, but I feel like all kinds of awesome for having that happen!
Well, you’re all kinds of awesome anyway…this is just icing!
*borrows the halibut*
*thwacks self*
OW!
Shellacking is MUCH more painful than the laminated stuff.
And it preserves better.
So you think that the war in Iraq has lowered the chances of a terrorist attack on the US? How naïve.
I love your “all people who are against the war are hippies” mentality. It’s completely accurate and without any logical faults whatsoever.
Indeed. And stop bogarting the bong.
Bogart? Boy, do I need a big sleep.
It’s mine, I get to use it first.
Dude, you’re like, as bad as those warmongers. Pass it, now!
*chokes on the cloud of smoke in failblog*
*Puts on gasmask*
Fuggin’… Twenty-three… Huh huh…
(RogueThree will be in drug rehab below this level)
And Iraq’s actions has WHAT to do with 9/11?
I don’t think ghouck was talking about 9/11 in that comment
the really sad thing is, low people in high places aren’t even lying anymore about it not being for the oil…
Lol, , just what are we getting in the form of oil? Let me guess, , the US was responsible for 9/11 and the telephone companies assassinated JFK also, right?
Just look at the gigantic profits that are being made by oil companies. Current affairs knowledge fail.
what ghouck is doing right now is called cognitive dissonance. basically it’s too painful to admit that he’s half the moron he’s been taken for so in the famous words of Adam: “I reject your reality and substitute my own”
Excellent analysis. I believe you are completely correct. Not only that, but he’s resorting to ad hominem attacks instead of talking about the issue (a typical Republican dodge, by the way). After all, when we make a comment he doesn’t like, he calls us pot-smoking hippies.
Yeah, if he had at least taken a more mature approach to his commenting we might have taken him more seriously.
you can label it a conspiracy theory in an effort to discredit the idea, that doesn’t make it untrue. no i don’t think the us government perpetrated 9/11, but it has certainly been using the aftermath to its advantage, seriously, have you read the patriot act? our government feels the need to keep us in fear, the russians had a good run for a while, and terrorism is just the latest craze. in case the public gets too jaded, what with not having any real terrorist activity for 7 years now, we have illegal immigration and identity theft right behind, ready to take the spotlight
A scared population is an obedient and gullible population.
I love you.
The feeling is mutual, baby.
self love ftw!
*masturbates*
why’s it so wet hear
(here)
why’s it so inane to hear you here?
*climbs out from the bottom of the comment dogpile*
That was AWESOME!!!
*becomes aware of the residual tension in the air*
Um… unlike war. Or suicide.
*snork!*
Have I just been snorked at by Dragonwriter?
Gosh… I feel all intelligent-like now.
yes but the manner in which it is waged can increase the failure to legendary magnitude.
“There are recent estimates that suggest”?
Weasel-wording WIN, reliable source fail.
That’s obscene — and would it still would be even were it only one person who’s taken their lives in a PTSD suicide. They’re quoting the Army itself, and it’s thousands.
How’s this for a reliable source? According to ArmyTimes (“Your Online
Resource for Everything Army”):
“WASHINGTON — Soldier suicides this year could surpass the record rate of last year, Army officials said Thursday, urging military leaders at all levels to redouble prevention efforts for a force strained by two wars.”
TMI Service Fail.
The attempted suicide rates among soldiers returning from war isn’t any higher than those who’ve never been in the military.
You can use the same kind of logic to prove marriage kills people because 50% of them end in death.
Bad statistical logic, Dizzy. Military populations are screened for mental disorders prior to enlistment. They should therefore have lower rates of suicide than the general public. (Even so, the suggestion that the suicide rates are the same for combat vets and the whole population has become suspect in recent weeks–see below.) War can and does make people mentally ill. The rate of PTSD in vets returning from combat is much higher than the general population. Those individuals are at higher risk than others for becoming suicidal. And we aren’t taking good enough care of them.
.
___
Suicides among active-duty soldiers this year are on pace to exceed both last year’s all-time record and, for the first time since the Vietnam War, the rate among the general U.S. population, Army officials said yesterday. ( Washington Post, September 5, 2008)
.
____
The number of suicides among veterans of wars in Iraq and Afghanistan may exceed the combat death toll because of inadequate mental health care, the U.S. government’s top psychiatric researcher said.
.
Community mental health centers, hobbled by financial limits, haven’t provided enough scientifically sound care, especially in rural areas, said Thomas Insel, director of the National Institute of Mental Health in Bethesda, Maryland….
.
[A] Rand Corporation study published [in April] found about 20 percent of returning U.S. soldiers have post- traumatic stress disorder or depression, and only half of them receive treatment. (Bloomberg, May 5)
FAIL FAIL
Obviously and easily photoshopped. The military kicks people out for even hinting at suicidal tendencies. They would never recruit them.
http://www.museumofhoaxes.com/hoax/weblog/permalink/suicidal_teens_welcome/
Who cares? It’s funny.
Mueum of Hoaxes, I guess.
mmmmueummm … hoaxes!
Not really. I yawned irl.
used to be that way i suppose. Then people started refusing to serve a fifth term.
Come on ! Real war is way cooler than Counter-Strike !
Retort inside.
Geez, I hope that worked.
cuz in real war, you’re not limited to ONE F-ING FRAG GRENADE!
double your carnage, double your fun. FRAG GRENADES ROCK!!
This advert was sponsered by Halliburton.
Closed captioning provided by Enron.
Haha, *high-five*
*high-fives back*
S.O.B.’s haven’t even paid me yet…..
Firstly I hope this isn’t real. Secondly… anyone else notice that the US Army car is parked in a Handicap Space?
Double Fail?
Maybe it belongs to an amputee in the army? War costs an arm and a leg sometimes.
Why even have handicapped parking at a recruitment center? The Army’s getting desperate.
No, establishments are REQUIRED to have handicapped parking if their parking area exceeds a certain size. Shift the blame FAIL.
Have you no sense of humor?
He’s still fuming about the ‘hippies’, it’s clouding his sense of humour.
Or is that the marijuana?
LOL *high-five*
*misses because time is moving really slow*
Oh shit, don’t die, I hear that can be another side-effect.
*panics*
It can’t kill me, I’m already dead.
Anyone for a Matrix reference?
Not this time BFF — sometimes folks just don’t need CGI effects when they can go organic.
Hehe, nothing beats a natural high!
Hee hee hee…
Who has the Doritos??
I brought Sun Chips…
Don’t look at me, I’ve got the 12 rounds of peanut butter on toast.
(Minus toast rack, you’ll be glad to hear.)
Are Pringles acceptable?
I got some spicy sweet.
*nom nom nom!*
Hey! Dragonwriter’s hogging all the snacks!
Shhh! I have popcorn, but don’t tell Dragonwriter.
Anyone who cares, raise your hand.
*raises hand*
<__>
*slowly lowers hand*
:’(
*<__>*
*<_<*
*brings a large bag of “Old Vienna Red Hot RIpplets” to share*
Careful, they’re wicked spicy.
Um, I’d love some, but I was denied Chartreuse yesterday and am afraid to ask…
I’m happy to share, but these are chips that must be accompanied by a by a beverage. They are that hot.
I have some Strongbow and I’m willing to share!
Beer or soda? I’m buying…
Damn, too slow. I love some cider. Cider night!
BEER!!!! Mmmmmmmm…… yum.
Dragon should know about these chips. They’re only available in her neck of the woods. I have to get a friend of mine to mail them to me. Or pickup a bag or two when I visit.
Wow another sad day in America. Kids have no idea what it means to serve their country. They must be too busy trying to figure out who to vote for on American Idol. Generation FAIL.
Looks like you failed at educating the younger generation then, doesn’t it?
I know serving my country doesn’t mean fighting in an unjust war because someone told me too. And it’s not a new phenomenon. Just look at all the people who dodged the draft in Vietnam.
Don’t you just love the ‘with us or against the country’ mentality surrounding this war? reminds me of the good ol’ days when every one on this blog would’ve been blacklisted. We knew who was good and who was bad back then…..
lessee.. vote for american idol OR support a war of aggression..
i have to side with idol on this one (as much as i hate to)
The US government did that when they sentenced so many kids to die on the gross miscalculation that they could create a democratic society in Iraq overnight.
*sticks a “PEACE IS PATROTIC, TOO!” sign on the front lawn*
*leaves red pen where it is in respect of the pure win content of the comment*
Aye, sister.
Dammit.
*writes an “i” on the sign and hopes it’s in the right place*
Oops! In your current, altered state-of-mind you’ve now made it “PATIROTIC”!
*blinks…*
Looks right to me…pass the doobie, wouldja?
*surreptitiously hands Dragon a cigarette – bogarts the joint*
::leaves these buds alone::
Don’t run too fast, you’ll damage your ankle joints.
*gives the Admiral a brownie*
*asks where to find one*
Its also a sad day in America when war vets spout drivel with nothing to back it up! Guess Kerry was right!
LOL – IM GONNA SIGN UP NOW!!!
here i am!!
Rock you like a hurricane.
Oops, I just remembered that’s not something to laugh about at the moment.
*hopes all the southern yanks are safe*
I am, I don’t know about the Texans. Haven’t watched the news in a while.
You mean Georgia’s being invaded again?? God save Atlanta!
“Ma! Get the shotgun! Those durn Russkies are after the peach tree again!”
More like the damn yankees — tryin’ to take the very best fuzz on the peach.
(Virgil Caine is my name … and I’ll do the resurrection Time Warp again!)
I’m an Angels fan.
Actually, more into reincarnating bodhisattvas myself.
You don’t like them?
*cries*
^ angling to get herself something to cry out about
we’re fine, thnx
Why am I not surprised?
You sure play a mean pin ball.
Who?
Doctor?
*TARDIS landing noise*
Exterminate!
You are not compatible. You will be deleted!
::Waits with Tommy gun.::
You do realise the Doctor can regenerate?
Not now, Admiral…I’m playing the silver ball.
*feels all the bumpers*
*tilts!*
Special lit!
You have such a supple wrist…
I think it’s from all the honey.
*pours some nectar*
jesus! ….wow….
Where? Where?
*Looks for the saviour*
Nah, it’s just some naughty boy.
That’s what his mom said.
His mom…
*masterbates*
Photoshopped.
this is shooped. i can tell by the pixels and from seeing a few shoops in my day.
Throw your life away, the American way!
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/televisiontvthemelyrics-50s60s70s/mash.htm
Hey LOZ send me your address and I will send you a prescription for 2 testicles. Seems you are 2 short.
Gawd, I should hope so, considering Loz is a woman.
Dumbass.
Haha, yeah. Thanks ‘warvet’, but no thanks. Keep them, it seems you need them more than I do.
*shares*
*partakes*
This is fake. The poster was inserted with a computer program such as The Gimp or Adobe Photoshop.
Wut is this “Adobe Photoshop” thing u speek of? IM preety sure no-one who frequents this site has any idea WHAT ur talking bout……*rolls eyes*
Oh, you’re going DOWN.
Darn it! I have the perfect pic to go with this one, and I can’t get it into the lol-builder! It keeps getting stuck some how.
lol-builder FAIL…
LOZ I apologize. Your comments all make sense now. I should have known you are a woman the moment I read them.
BTW why are all of you trying to bash me over IRAQ? Show me any post I said anything about IRAQ? As far as I remember we are hunting bin laden in Afghanistan although he is most likely in Pakistan IMHO.
Ah, a sexist as well as an ignorant murderer. I should’ve known the moment I read your comments!
Actually, Loz…he gave you a compliment. Your comments were well-reasoned and logical, unbound by conformist thinking. It really makes no difference if he thought it was an insult or not.
Haha, good point my fiery friend
*hugs*
Even this guy is has enough well reason to LOL at that. Beautiful.
(And when I say beautiful, I mean LADIES!!!)
I’m afraid there is no gender link to non-conformist thought. been to the mall lately? ’tis rather sad.
Wow now I’m a murderer. I never took a plane full of men, women and children and crashed it into a building. But Al-Qaeda did. Except for flight 91 where they FOUGHT back.
We obviously have different opinions on the subject. The best part is we are able to share them FREELY thanks to those who have and continue to fight for our country. Where would we be without that? I’m done with this subject but before I go I will tell you what I think about the war.
Should we have invaded IRAQ: NO
Did the president lie: Absolutely
Should we have invaded Afghanistan: YES
Are we safer for it: YES
Before we invaded Afghanistan Al-Qaeda was operating terrorist training camps and plotting attacks with no repercussions. Today they are on the run and in hiding. They are still fighting us hard just not HERE.
Before you post some witty comment about a recruiting office take a moment and thank all of the courageous men and women who are willing to fight so you can have your freedoms.
And before YOU comment take a moment to remember three things: one, this is a lol-blog, we make fun of stuff here. Two, WE are the people that you protected. Three, not everybody here is from the U.S.
Four, perhaps you think we should just watch as our “freedoms” are taken away from us by the very people who deployed all those soldiers. Five, our own people have perpetrated war crimes so horrific that the media has been censored to keep people from knowing about them.
And six…I often do thank our military folk. They are pawns who are trained to kill and are being used for unconscionable purposes–and as fuzz pointed out, often with drastic and tragic consequences to themselves–but I wish only that they come home safely.
What freedoms have you lost? Can you give us a specific example with dates and times so we might verify? I find it hard to believe the government has altered your day to day life. I heard a similar comment at work last week and I posed the same question. The silence was deafening.
Day to day life not altered?
Been to an airport recently?
Had to support a librarian’s wish not to disclose patron info?
Know where your phone records have been lately?
Aware of all the government data lists you’re on?
Had any friends unable to visit your country for friggin’ medical conferences?
Had to dance around patient data reporting so they can get some simple health care without risk of deportation and the mutilation of their family life?
Had your country’s reputation diminished in the eyes of the rest of the world? …
Have you been paying attention?
*cuddles fuzz*
You win
Thanks, Loz. But I’m sure you know, I wish I didn’t this time.
You beat me to it, but…perfect (albeit tragic) response.
*smooch*
Thanks.
I know, *consoles*
Here, have some absinthe, it’ll blur your perception of reality. And morality.
But it’ll protect against mind-Boggle-ing.
tree hugers sticking together who would have thought?
Yes. We embiggen trees.
LOL. I love you, Dragon.
Day to day life not altered? Not mine but I don’t live in fantasy land.
Been to an airport recently? YES thx for keeping bad guys off my plane
Had to support a librarian’s wish not to disclose patron info? If you are looking at bomb building books please end up on a list (Oklahoma city ring a bell?)
Know where your phone records have been lately? I have nothing to hide
Aware of all the government data lists you’re on? NO
Had any friends unable to visit your country for friggin’ medical conferences? LOL NO
Had to dance around patient data reporting so they can get some simple health care without risk of deportation and the mutilation of their family life? Illegal entry has it’s risks. Besides why should my tax dollars pay for them?
Had your country’s reputation diminished in the eyes of the rest of the world? No country is like by everyone. No not one.
Have you been paying attention? YES and I can think no just eat what the media feeds me
You asked for examples to disconfirm your suggestion that the current U.S. government has not altered our way of life. My comment was intended to point out ways it has.
.
In direct reply to what you’ve now posted, I’ll say simply that I very much do want my tax dollars to be used to save a child’s life, with utter disregard to his or her status as an “illegal” human being.
.
Beyond that, with you now choosing to refer to fantasy lands and plans to build bombs, laughing at medical conferences being denied access to the world’s best minds, and intimating that persons like myself don’t think — that only inclines me to join those who respond with silence to you.
the silence may have been brought on by disbelief at your ignorance… i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again, have you read the patriot act? just one example
I see much to commend in WarVet’s post here, especially the effort to acknowledge freedom of thought and opinion.
.
I will again call for better appreciation of historical contexts, something Americans really and truly tend to have too little of.
.
We, for instance, actually helped Afganistan become a Taliban-dominated country, when assisting the ouster of the Soviets, without enough cultural understanding about what was going to come after that.
.
And when our President uses a word like “Crusade,” he has no idea the impact that has on the Muslim world. The last time Westerners “crusaded,” we ate some of the conquered Muslims (at the siege of Maarat). They still remember that, while we tend to have little idea what they are even referring to.
I would like to point out that someone who calls themselves a warvet, then spouts off a bunch of ignorant crap is doing it SIMPLY BECAUSE he gets a reaction. Reacting with “moral indignance” is only going to encourage him.
In short, don’t feed the trolls. Getting a sensible debate on foreign policy in Failblog is just not going to happen.
I’m also going out on a limb saying probably NEVER been to war either.
Talons…do you actually read the comments? I’m thinking you really don’t, otherwise you would see that 1) there are several very interesting conversations and debates going on at the moment, 2) there are many different points of view being expressed, and there is actual learning going on, 3) asking people to justify their claims is a very good way to expose ignorance and faulty assumptions/arguments, and 4) those of us with more than two brain cells to rub together are not “reacting with moral indignance” but responding with facts and logical reasoning.
So why don’t you just go set some dead babies on fire…that’s much more your forté anyway, isn’t it?
5) We have managed to do this with a modicum of civility as well, thus indicating we can have a true exchange of ideas.
civility healthily balanced out with the occasional burning baby.
Well, yeah, there is a fair amount of that too.
My you are very self important. Forgive me for polluting your precious arena of ideas with free speech.
*laughs*
You missed a comma.
Just exercising my own self-same right, there, talons.
Free speech without worth pollution.
…worth pollution?
*confused look*
It’s what ghouck and warvet cause in the failblog atmosphere.
A tangled mind is so fun to work with, my apologies.
Free-speech-without-worth pollution.
To loz,
I now have to clean my computer.
Thank you.
BURN! I’m really burned, I’m going to go slash my wrists and bleed out on the sidewalk. U guise ar so much SMARTER than me!!11!!1!!1!!one!
*celebrates*
Umm…no. That was not a burn. It was a mere statement of fact.
Well if it wasn’t a burn before, this one definitely is.
Not really. It’s more of an attempt to burn but only got to lukewarm temperature before dying back down to nothing.
You’ve added less than nothing.
Hee hee…pronoun trouble!
It’s a gift.
Not just yet. but soon, I’m sure
I really, really, really wasn’t trying to burn you, talons. This is just called “talking”.
Of course, if you really want to be burned, I’m sure we can arrange something.
He’s a glutton for punishment.
I have some lawn mower fuel to use as an accelerant if you want?
Do you really think this dragon need accelerant?
wrong burns
Wrong, yet again.
And the fail continues…
At least there’s some form of consistency then.
This is why I stay out of political debates. o.o
Another TMI Service Fail
The crusades were an effort to stop the muslims from spreading because they were already killing ‘infidels’ for not believing in their psychotic prophet. The war in the middle east today is no different. They’ve wanted you dead long before W was in the White House.
can’t we all just get along?
I suppose you’re going to tell us the Fourth Crusade’s attacks on Zara, Trieste, and Constantinople were “to stop the muslims from spreading.” Catholic Zara and Trieste, and Greek Orthodox Constantinople were Christian cities.
It wasn’t about “stopping the muslims” — it was about pillage.
ooooOOO they’ve put it in hip new letters.. cant… resist! teenagers…like.. cool…writing!! I MUST JOIN!
*Takes down sign*
that’s awful…
also, only teens?
I’d like to see ‘suicidal OAPs welcome’
Ahahaha, this reminded me of a bit by Jeff Dunham with Achmed
“So, do you guys have a motto, like ‘We’re looking for a few good men’?”
“We’re looking for some eedeeots with no future”
“So where do you get your recruits?”
“The suicide hotline”
Register now and get a free DVD and boonie hat!
(And burial!)
Yeah it’s too bad every soldier we have is dead. Plan B anyone?
Obama? As in the Presidential candidate?
Yes, I’m sure Senator Obama is posting comments on failblog. I hear the masturbating comments are his favourite.
Bad taste WIN!
DUPLICATE FAIL.
wow. That is an amazing fail fail.
Somebody set us up the teen!
Actually, there are so many emo suicidals… recruitment WIN ?
Well, at least they’re being honest about it.
Copy Pasta
Did anybody else notice the handicap sign on the building? Fail x2
YOOU ARE ALL BUMMERS
“why kill yourself when you can kill others for your government?”
Lol, I’d call that a recruiting win XD.
but uh…it looks photoshoped to me…anyone else?
They attempt to fix that suicidal urge when you join then they send you to war where you can really get killed.
lolz they are just being honest =)
Perfect, where do I sign
Honesty Win!
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