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Oh wow — first?
Um… 2nd?
t’rd
No, you are not!
well… we both posted @ the same time, who was first?
Does is really matter?
Toss a coin for it. Heads or tails?
Always been a legs and ass man meself.
All you’ll work out is who’ll get tazed by bondfan first
*taze*
I love that school or whatever it is…
as i can see, the poster didnt saw the not…
Shouldn’t that be heads or FAILS?
*ba-dum-tsh!*
Looks like turds and fails to me.
I noticed the turd as well. Hm.
(Cut off) heads, or fails?
FOURTH
LOL
WIN
More like Bullet Formatting fail, but still funny. That should have been under the “do not” heading above it, but then that “do not” should have had its own section, so fail either way.
This isnt a fail. as you can see, the 4th dot down, says NOT and the “FAIL” follows under.
Theerd
Bronx University?
Masochist’s High
more like Failsville Community College
School of Hard Knocks
Ahh did you also gain a Diploma in Cunning?
Cunning Linguists, I believe.
Cunny Lingus, Dublins favourite airline!
Have 3 gold Stars from me.
Have 2 from me. -1 for poor punctuation. *holds up score*
Double-Entendre WIN!!
Yay for Blackadder! You just made me as as happy as a man who thought a cat had done its business in his pie, but it turned out to be an extra large blackberry!
‘You are to be congratulated my friend: we live in a world where depravity and disease are commonplace and yet you mrDobalina are without a doubt the most disgusting person I have ever met. I would shake your hand but I fear it would come off’
Hmph, well your brain is like the four-headed man-eating haddock fish-beast of Aberdeen.
In what way?
It doesn’t exist.
That comment was about as useful as a barber’s shop on the steps of a guillotine.
“If you cut off someone’s head, you
do not worry about his hair.” —Stalin, 1930
all this arguing over splitting hair heads
Bronx cheer.
Win.
If only my school had had this sort of Code of Conduct, I may have made the Principal’s Honor Roll.
Rumor was, he had a board with a nail through it to administer discipline.
(Strangely enough, “board with a nail” turned out to be “luxuriously comfy couch”.)
Luxuriously comfy couch?
CONFESS!!!!
Among the many tools available to the Spanish Inqusition are cunning, surprise, and the COMFY COUCH!
possible bully win?
Hah! Tab fail!
indentation fail
Actually in this case I think it should be a “Bullyet Fail”….:-)
Yea… umm if you look at the bullet point above, it says NOT
Yea… ummm, if you read the bullet points like that, you’d have you believe the school meant for students to not do all assessment tasks and examinations, not not smoke in class, not abide by the internet computer usage rules, not return library resources, and not not disrupt classes.
Could it possibly be that this is a case of bullet points being formatted incorrectly, and that everyone here understands that?
And that is exactly why this is a fail.
right, eveyone except JediYounglingMarloinSkitop. Who, btw, has the worst srceen name ever
As far as screen names go, that one is incredibly, absolutely, undeniably awful.
SSJGokuVegetaDBZYugiohNarutoMaster.
Keshundheit
Gesundheit*
makes me want to srceam
^ srcasm
::or cream or gasm::
How about both?
aye, it does, but this is a seperate bullet, therefore, “not” no longer aplies to it. ever learn how to do outlines?
a bullet to the bonehead
____
(oh, and abstract, has two p’s … oops, I spelled wrong!!)
That’s a seperate issue.
seperate?
*goes crawling into a pyramid and dies.
Don’t be silly. You can just borrow my bukkit o’ pudding.
thanks. I appreciate it.
*steals bukkit o’ pudding and wonders how many get the reference*
Not I,
but I want to……..
It looks like the Code of Conduct for a Catholic high school here in Australia.
I kinda like how student have a responsibility to “Cheating” too. They don’t specify if that’s on tests or in relations…
As long as they don’t cheat themselves.
Fuggin’ A … you don’t know where to start reading, do you?
knowing when to start isn’t nearly as important as knowing when to stop. didn’t your school ever teach you about the dangers of reading addiction?
That’s offensive, I have that. It’s like crystal meth.
You should try reading anonymous.
Or at least authors who write with a pseudonym.
George Eliot? I thought you were dead!
Actually, the status is just genderly ambiguous.
“Brett, I’m David Bowie…”
Well, at students don’t have to threaten and assault the faculty…
That’s not the ‘least’ of their problems…
Well done…subtle, yet the burn stings just as well…
indeed, you have my compliments
That could possibly make “Burn the Week”.
I think this is my school…
If not, well, all the students did anyway.
Well its a sign of the times.
In the beginning the teachers beat the pupils
Then the pupils beat the teachers
Will equilibrium ever be found?
I wish to include a clever chemical equation here, one demonstrating equilibrium, with ‘pointy, both way arrows’ and such.
Unfortunately my chemistry class used to be made up by two back-to-back doubles on a Thursday morning and was so dull I resorted to using the casing of my pen to fire projectiles at my class mates.
Needless to say I failed Chemistry.
You did, however, uphold your student responsibility to assault your fellow students. =)
i was (permanently) kicked out of chemistry class senior year… we were doing a lab which involved dipping various metals into various acids- while mr. h was giving the lecture, i asked if it was ok if i lit my bunsen burner, and, apparently underestimating my penchant for mischief, he agreed… one of the strips of metal was magnesium… i held it with pliers in the flame, it took a while to get lit, but the timing was perfect, he had just noticed what i was doing and yelled, “what are you doing?” the entire class turned to look just as it caught flame, so everybody had a bit of a blind spot for the next few minutes.
i didn’t fail, but i was barred from the class, i had to do all the labs and such after school for the rest of the year… but it was worth it
I think you went to fail school. We were encouraged to set fire to magnesium to observe what would happen (not directly observe. Kind of half gaze at what would happen from the corner of our eye). Hmm…come to think of it maybe it was my school was fail school.
…
The most fun thing (as a 12-year-old) to do in Science class was throw and handful of iron filings directly at a bunsen burner, and watch TWO magical golden fountains (one from the fire, one from the teacher pissing his pants).
I just mixed any and all chemicals within arms reach. (A result of our teacher leaving to watch over the other “less responsible class”.
It smelt foul and stuck to everything that touched it, to this day I still don’t know what it was.
Since we’re all telling stories nobody cares about, one kid at my high school way back when jacked a bunch of magnesium ribbon from the lab and hid it under his shirt… it was raining heavily that day, so when he went to go to his car it got a little uncomfortable.
A guy in my chemistry class stole an entire brick of sodium from the chem lab and threw it into a snowbank outside of school.
Big…booom.
And the teacher of my chemistry class named her poodle “Cujo” because she heard the name somewhere, and wore one of those stupid t-shirts with a poodle and the name in cursive.
My chemistry teacher could pick up a hot beaker with his bare hand … because in just a couple years the poor klutz had spilled so many chemicals he had no sensation left in his fingers!
Shop teachers are always missing at least one finger. It’s like that scene in UHF every day for those poor bastards.
Carol never wore her safety goggles. Now she doesn’t need them.
Where:
PT = passive teacher
VT = violent teacher
PS = passive student
VS = violent student
αVT + βPS ⇔ σPT + τVS
I think I love you.
The admiration and affection is mutual, dear strong and fair Dragon.
*melts*
♥
It’s entirely possible that I love you to. Clearly you WIN chemistry.
Love you to what?
Clearly, ripple’s love is unconditional.
I fall so easily
How the heck did they dodge that bullet?
Easy, they realized they were in the matrix, so they just leaned back slowly while the camera circled around them.
Fantastic. Woohoo for incorrect indenting!
you have a responsibility to FAIL.
dude, there is more to the writing… obviously thats not what its really saying
um……duh, that’s why it is fail. regardless of what follows, it still says you have a responsibility to assault students and staff.
more writing:
- with blunt objects
- with small stones
- with knives
I had a student throw a textbook at my head once…
It’s probably because you’re boring.
I understand, dragon. I’ve had many, many things thrown at me. My 7th grade math class can be especially bad.
Yeah, but…I teach at a university!
Wow… Remind me not to come to you for teaching advice.
Hehehe…he was angry with me because I wouldn’t change his grade
on an exam.
.
“You got the answers wrong,” I pointed out.
.
“But I meant to put down the right ones!!” he shouted. “You should have known what I meant!”
Huh… I had one of my 7th graders try to pull that same argument.
I guess they don’t change, do they?
My absolute favorite: I gave a quiz in class, and then took the students over to the campus library to do research for their next paper. One student sat down next to me and said:
.
“Hi…sorry about this, but can I make up the quiz from today?”
I stared at him, confused.
“You were there,” I said. “You were in class. You took the quiz.”
“Yeah,” he said, “but I didn’t do the reading, so I didn’t know any of the answers. So…can I make it up?”
I lol’d
You ar’boreal?
Oooh! Let’s make risotto!
I love this.
We used to have that in the guidleines of our student diaries in highschool! I had forgotten about it, but at the time it was the cause of much merriment.
if you read the entire thing there is a section that starts with “Don’t”
this one doesn’t qualify as a FAIL
no, that section starts with “not”, and there are a bunch of sub-bullets (for lack of a better word) of which “threaten” etc is not part, so it does in fact read “students have a responsibility to threaten or assault fellow students or staff”
typical administrative fail
those who can, do
those who can’t, teach
those who can’t teach, administrate
those who can, do
those who can’t, teach
those who can’t teach, are called ‘Gym Teachers’
That is untrue. I taught gym and English, thank you very much. Our other gym teacher taught religion classes.
those who reach menarche, period.
*snert!*
*snort!*
*snurt!*
*snarf* oh look another reference
intelligence: FAIL
Well as long as I have to threaten other students and staff I guess I will…
C’mon you wuss, leave the name of the school in the pic. Guess his school pride prompted him to blur it out.
Or fear of legal repercussions.
One of the first things it says about a students responsibility is to treat other students and staff (and by extension the school) with respect. And not embarrass or vilify…. so this Fail could well be construed as embarrassing.
Ω
= the teachers’ last meal
So, you can drink alcohol, so long as you are not under the influence of it. Win!
Oh, the difference a Tab key can make…
obviously some of the text in the syllabus was cut off from the picture.
now if a reference like a frame of the desk were present and it had a typo that says exactly what we can read then it is a fail.
other wise it’s a photography fail!
Students have a responsibility to threaten or assault people around them ? Must be a Madrassa.
Before you call me a hater or intolerant, at least read Sura 9 of the Qu’ran.
You can find strident and intolerant messages in most all the world’s holy books (and through the course of history Jews and Christians have for the most part been better treated by Muslims who had political power over them than vice versa; consider the history of Spain as one example). We could all use with softer hearts and more open minds.
.
Here’s another Muslim holy work:
.
____
Those who don’t feel this Love
pulling them like a river,
those who don’t drink dawn
like a cup of spring water
or take in sunset like supper,
those who don’t want to change,
.
let them sleep.
.
This Love is beyond the study of theology,
that old trickery and hypocrisy.
I you want to improve your mind that way,
.
sleep on.
.
I’ve given up on my brain.
I’ve torn the cloth to shreds
and thrown it away.
.
If you’re not completely naked,
wrap your beautiful robe of words
around you,
.
and sleep.
.
~ Rumi, Ode 314
Through an illogical numbering system (the longest Suras are first;shortest last) Sura 9 is the last chapter written by the prophet. Sura 9 (and many others) abrogate or make null and void earlier chapter verses that contradict it. When Muhammed was in Mecca, he had few followers, no army and modest wealth, so his verses were all …softer and friendly. But when Muhammed went to Medina, he had a large army, great wealth, and many more followers, so … he changed his tune. Sura 9:5 ‘When the holy months are over slay the idolators, wherever you find them, take them and beseige them.’ Christians and Jews are ‘idolators’ to Muslims. It’s not just this verse, but many others support this.
Islam is a religion of “peace”. That peace is when they believe Islam controls the whole world and implements Sharia law over all of it.
Christian’s believe their faith will rule the world through Christ’s return and his power alone, NOT military action.
Jesus died for the redemption of the world; Muhammed killed for the sake of his god. Don’t EVER let anybody convince you these two faiths are the same.
There is hatred and ignorance in all cultures.
If Christians truly do “NOT” believe in military action, why have they followed a book in which God repeatedly says things like, “Go and smite the people of Amalek, and do not spare them, but kill both man and woman, child and infant” (the Bible, 1 Sam 15:3). And why did Christians slaughter all the Muslim men, women, and children at Ma’arrat and then EAT them (during the First Crusade, in 1098)? And why would Christian Protestants and Christian Catholics kill over three thousand of one another in Ireland just a few decades ago?
It goes on and on and on.
Again, I invite you to compare how the Muslims respected both Christians and Jews in Spain when they had political control there, versus what the Christians did to the Jews and Muslims when Christians took it over (viz., “in military action”).
If we continue to make sweeping, uninformed, and unkind stereotypes of others, the whole world, to paraphrase Gandhi, will remain blind.
There is also beauty, wisdom, and kindness in all cultures.
Wake up. Go there.
School of hard knocks!
More of an indentation fail
Someone actually read that!
It’s obviously not a good fail, because IF you read the things that atre not highlited, then it says “NOT” and bully is under that. Not a good fail.
Actually it’s a Secretarial Failure. As TimME said it was wrongly indented (and also wrongly bulleted – the main points have filled bullets, whilst the sub sections have hollow bullets), making the threaten and assault part of the main points. So attempt to state fail – FAIL. Thank you for calling. Please Call Again.
Meta-fail. This is under things to NOT do.
Hmm. Meta Fail. Sorry!! Claiming a Meta-Fail – FAIL!!! Read carefully here’s what it says:
(Solid bullet Point – Start of Seperate Section) NOT
(Hollow Bullet Point – Start of subsection – Indented) List of sub point
(Solid Bullet Point NOT Indented – Start of New Section) Threaten….yada yada..
As previous stated it’s a secretarial and Indenting fail since the section was wrongly bulleted and not indented, thus appearing that it was part of a brand new section). If you can’t see that I’ll send you my glasses
Does anyone notice that this isn’t a “fail”, it says “Students have a responsibility to:” and the before the indented paragraph it says “not:” and after the paragraph has what is highlighted.
“Student have a responsibility to:” “Not:” “Threaten or assault fellow students or staff”
Looks more like formatting fail than responsibility fail …
Oh man. I wish there was a typo like that in my student hand book.
don’t i wish…
bee careful with all bullets!!
this is the biggest fail of a fail post ever whoever posted this is an idiot cuz it says things not to do.
Uh thats in the not list. Fail Blog Failed…
the person who posted this fails because it clearly says “NOT” five lines up from that