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Cheezburger Network Blog
God’s Balls! My first FIRST!
Also, that’s why my hubby proposed to me naked in the sack. It’s hard to say no to a guy who just screwed your brains out.
I always say “NO” when a man tries to screw my brains out.
NO NO NO! RAPE! NO!
YES YES YES!
Ooh baby, just like that…
Like babies eh?
Only on ice with a splash of vodka.
yum baby-tini’s!
A vodka baby-tini, shaken, not sti-Oh good god, what am I saying?
*Cries quietly in corner at own sickness*
BABIES! Damn, I’m hungry. Let’s fire up the ol’ BBQ and make some tasty dead baby corpse flambe sirloin rump roast shoulder pork dead animals!
How dare you ignore my James Bond impression!
*Slaps talonsofpeace*
I’ll slap you again if I have to!
A shaken martini waters it down due to the ice chipping off due to the vigorous shaking, whereas a stirred martini is gently stirred and no ice (or very little) is chipped and then melted. Therefore Mr. Bond drinks a wussy drink.
.
(WW)
A shaken martini might initially take on more water, but a stirred on keeps the ice in the glass, it continues o melt, and continues to dilute the drink…….think about it
OMG NO! You heretic. The martini must still be strained when poured into the glass.
u diots its dry martini shaken not stirred
Thank you, Canuck. Only he understands Bond with me.
James Bond Martini from Casino Royale (the book):
three measures of Gordon’s Gin
one of vodka
half a measure of Kina Lillet.
Shake it very well until it’s ice-cold,
then add a large thin slice of lemon peel.
Wow…you’re just going to sit there and let this guy call you a diot?
udder diots
Well…I didn’t say he was wrong…
“Wow…you’re just going to sit there and
let this guy call you a diot?”
Naw, he’s Canadian. We just look the other way.
First off, raelalt is right- Bonds drink is a sissy. A true martini is Gin, frozen, simply poured into a glass, also frozen. A dry martini is a martini with nothing else it, so Bond doesn’t drink a true martini.
To fuzz: Stop filling my cows w/ diots so i can make more steak w/ them
S’matter, you don’t like low-cal spotted milk?
No, fortythree….there is no “true martini” there are gin martinis and vodka martinis. a dry martini means either little or no vermouth or to use a dry vermouth. its all to the taste of the drinker. regardless of whether the drink is
shaken or stirred, it is still strained as there should be no ice at all . shaking the drink makes it much colder than simply stirring.
true, but shaking bruises the gin and dilutes the drink with too much icemelt, and is therefore considered inferior by many cocktail lovers.
fortythree, though the drinks you have may be manly,
that doesn’t mean you have taste. James Bond surely does.
Would that be a baby-Q?
You all have the attention spans of a gnat…. I love it
@ forty-three
What you’re talking about is a “Churchill” martini (which is essentially a very cold glass of gin, drunk whilst looking at a bottle of vermouth.)
Stirring v shaking has already been covered well enough.
Gin is used for a martini. period.
Vodka martinis are called “vodka martinis” because you HAVE to ask for the vodka, otherwise you get gin.
Vermouth is used in a martini…even dry martinis at least get a rinse of it in the glass.
Olives, onion, lemon, lime pepper, mint and any other garnish is up to the individual
“dirty” is squeezing extra juice from the garnish into your cocktail.
AND lastly…Sir Ian Fleming (above) was right about the Bond drink…commonly referred to as a Vespa.
/FIN
Hey, it’s a good way to end world hunger!
I’m squintz and i approve this comment
“my name is michael j. caboose, and I HATE BABIES!” lol
dbl lolz
Oh, Mr. Don Logan reincarnated.
Can’t fuck with jesus…
Tell that to the Roman Catholics.
Or the Romans
Or Walter
Or Waldo.
I FOUND WALDO!!
in other news-waldo Did not find Jesus. And was soon cast into the lake of fire.
I’d toss him into the ring of fire.
(Comments wont dante below this level)
Dante’s Inferno? Anyone?
*Paging Loz and Dragonwriter*
*abandons hope*
Abandoning hope is somewhat sysophysian (sp?). . .
…And we have news that the amount of braincells have just increased with fuzz.
Which ring? What exactally was his crime? I am unfamiliar with the punishment for bad grammer and spelling, but MASTURBATING falls into the fourth or fifth ring….I think;)
The burning ring.
.
Or so says the man in black.
You haven’t read Dante, have you raelalt. Annabellie has, and she deserves to join the Failblog intelect club.
And you don’t know your Johny Cash do you?
.
I just wonder how many have actually read “Inferno” instead of just quoting the well known images and phrases garnered by others. Have you?
And you don’t know your Johnny Cash.
.
And I wonder just how many who quote the well known
(to the point of being cliched) concepts of Inferno have
actually read it.
.
Have you?
And you ain’t walked the line, NotACountryWesternBandFan.
Right on. I’m no C&W fan myself, but Cash transcended genre.
Well I bet you don’t have rhythm. Or the cocaine blues. Or stripes, for that matter.
I have read Dante.
And what did you learn?
hell is shiny.
I have read it…it was hell to get through…
I actually found it very Commediac.
If not divine.
Yeah, the whole thing reads like a dream.
Actually, the ring of fire I was referring to, is the geological ring of fire.
Oooh. I thought you were having hemorrhoid trouble…
You guys are so punny.
Oh if Dante could hear this now.
Let’s go to Cali!
LOL
Actually, you just got Rick Rolled!!1!
Eight year olds, dude. Eight year olds.
Obviously you’re not a golfer.
Stop WHINING and be to the point.
you are all here just telling jokes. don’t you know someone is raping jesus?!
does anybody notice that this is JESUS saying this? i’d say this is a name choice FAIL
That’s your excuse for not having any brains?
Oh damn you, I was SO close to getting this one. You absolute prick
Oh, I sorry. Here, have a failcake.
chocolate fail cake?
Gorramit, I had an appropriate response, but the failblog failed me. In any event:
Super Failcake!
cakewrecks(dot)blogspot(dot)com
Firefly/Serenity reference?
every damn day!
Shiny.
I’ll be in my bunk.
with vera.
juggling geese.
(Signals cannot be stopped below this level)
…and may it be your last
That’s ok, at least I’ve achieved one of my last great goals in life. All that’s left on my list is home-ownership and a boob job.
If you need a boob job, I know a guy.
Just call him Dad.
You called?
: masteurbates :
*joins*
Do you know a guy if I don’t need a boob job?
I’ve never met anyone with a conditional relationship with a guy.
[/demetrimartinwin]
Honey, you should meet me. ALL my relationships are conditional ones. Which is probably why I’m not married (and my mother thinks I’m a lesbian).
lol, how does one say something like that…”excuse me honey, but are you or are you not a lesbian? Want cookies?”
Good call, Lambwithwings.
I would’ve waited 2 weeks to compliment you because I really wanted to use the word “fortnight,” but I couldn’t wait that long.
Catch a hot dog, get a boob job!
Yeah! Congrats m8!!
Watch her lips as she bends down to speak to him: “DUDE! I’M YOUR SISTER”
Aw, weak.
My first FIRST and it’s a fake fail.
Lame.
God’s balls? *masturbates*
Oh my god!! I was AT THAT GAME!!!
Epic fail!!!
Who are you, me?
Fail!
Burn…
…Baby burn
Yes Yes! Dead babies on fire! Celebrate! Screw Burning Man and their stupid wood armature! Real dead babies are the dead bee’s knees! *Gargles*
Sorry? Are you a member of a new cult? Nice to meet you. How about a free trip to the loony bin.
We’re pretty sure there’s a multiple personality thing going on here.
I believe we prefer to be called schizophrenic.
“Schizo-phrenia” is better understood to mean “ruptured mind” — not “split personality.”
Someone with a split- or multiple-personality thing has a dissociative disorder (a somewhat exotic form of anxiety).
A schizophrenic has a psychosis.
And a jurgen is a youngster who believes jerking off and mommy jokes are something other than tiresome dumb shizzle.
whose link is a debt management scam.
Not cool man.
remember that time I proposed to you infront of those thousands of people at that basketball game and you walked away.- well at least the mascot gave me a sympathy hand job afterwords.
and a beer.
And an ice cream
and herpes
And impreginated you.
*impregnated
And a hair ball
i have two hair balls.
Really? Do you collect them? I’ve heard of stamp collectors, but a hairball collector?
Your mother collects them. /owned
…Um, that is the worst insult I have heard in a decade. ‘Cept for mine.
naw, that’s awesome! your mom…..
…should really watch what you’re doing on the Internet lately.
PORN!!!
There’s porn on the internet too???? OMG!! Why didn’t someone tell me? I’ve been wasting my time wacking off to the posts on the failblog all this time
Jim made me lol
The internet is no place for that kind of sleaze. Pornography on the internet is a disgrace. Anyone who watches porn on the internet will burn in Hell for all eternity.
[25 minutes later]
Well boys, looks like I’m going to hell.
For real, what was your joke? Mine was pretty wack so yours has got to be some dumb shizzle.
the hair collector joke. Sick ones win em all.
Yeah wow that sucked. I didn’t it was you because, to be truthfull, i expected more of you.
harbls?
ant true love.
^ only visible through magnifying glass
there’s no true love, like ant love. Oh yeah. One queen and a bunch of horny ants. Nothing says loving like bumping hard candy exoskeleton
drone on
I’d rather be a bee. They’re pretty much the same as ants as far as that goes. But they can also fly and have a stinger. Ironic thing is I can’t stand bees.
Iron is good for you.
Superman told me steel was better.
Worker ants and worker bees are all female (the bee’s stinger is a modification of the female sex organ) … and sterile. The only fertile ones are the queen and the drones. Largely for that reason, some biologists consider an entire ant or bee colony to be a single organism.
TMI Service lives up too his name. TMI for non-intellectuals.
just like VOLTRON! – one single organism- all having sex with itself
*to
well, anyone who thinks multiple seperate organisms are actually one oganism is clearly retarted.
Ant masturbation?
abstract, he sort of phrased it poorly. He’s talking about the theory of “swarm intelligence”, which means that certain organisms, each by it’s self very stupid, demonstrate the ability to function together very smoothly and in doing so, they acquire a high degree of intelligence. As demonstrated in ants, or in a more familiar case, failblog trolls. Each individual troll by it’s self is laughably ignorant and unintelligant and most are barely literate, but when you get three or four or five trolls in a comment thread, they can really get to you after a while
. Read this book and then tell me if it’s so “retarted”:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prey_(novel)
“Prey” – by Michael Crichton.
Offers an interesting perspective on nanotechnology and the theory of swarm intelligence.
ohhhh, irony…
i misspelled unintelligent
And the link is broked
You know what, f*ck it, just disregard my entire comment.
Still…research!
*tingles*
I can’t read Crichton anymore, he seems to write the same book over and over.
And some say that the entire earth can be considered a single organism (gaiai Hypothesis)
*gasp*
The author-gods will smite you for saying that.
TMI Service was not speaking about swarm intelligence, but about basic principles of biologic genetic. Some biologists think it sensible to view a collection of living material where no one part of it can reproduce, but which works together to perpetuate its genes — like ants and bees do — to be a single organism. A worker ant cannot reproduce; an ant colony can.
.
Consider the cells of our body — are we just many living parts that form one organism? Most would probably say yes to that. But then consider sponges — break them apart and they go on living and reproducing separately — is that one organism that then turns into many organisms? And the microscopic Volvox (collections of prospective single-celled organisms that arrange themselves into a sphere and then show some differentiation of function, but which are still capable of splitting off and doing it all over again) — is that many organisms that turn into one organism and then that one organism turns many organisms again?
.
Strictly speaking, where we draw the line to define a “separate organism” is a conceptual decision we ourselves construct; it is not a natural fact. Anyone who goes ahead and insists that their made up concept determine what is naturally real is both retarted and conceited.
*Last word of the first sentence should be “genetics,” and the final sentence’s “concept” should be plural.
.
By the way, there are of course biologists who also insist we use ecologic systems perspectives — pointing out there’s no such thing as a “separate organism,” because organisms are composed of, interact act with, and are in constant material exchange with, materials of their environment.
TMI service, you wouldnt happen to know Fuzz on the
concept by any chance?
a boo-bee?
i hate bees more than anything
do love boobies, though
Ants are candy? I should remember that next time I’m out in the desert tripping.
Honey ants could be called candy, I guess.
Best not to watch in strong sunlight.
and true love.
Again?!
Too late, the thread has already involved from insects to metals due to your spelling mistake
Evolved?
sub-geniused
Or would that be sub-geniied?
And changing avatar in honor of your prior reference.
Ha, Latin win.
lol.
How are you gentlemen?
What You Say?
must .. resist ..nerd urges !!
NYaaAAAaaaaRG!!!
ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US
You are on the way to destruction. There is no time to survive make your time. Ha Ha Ha!
omg how can one recite that wrong…
in this day and age…
Glitches don’t do such things right. BZzz pfft
Ahh! A glitch!
…but ooh, yay, infinite master balls!
NBA + Chinstrap + Marriage Proposal = Failbag
On an opposite note, keeping those goodie mounds she’s packing single = FTW
Now that’s a HUMONGOUS FAIL…
On second thought, its probably a WIN for the poor guy. Marriage is a FAIL by default.
true- sympathy sex win with cheerleader? or mascot
or both
Cheerleader sex?
*masturbates*
Masterbate?
*Cheerleader sex*
Perverted sickos?
*Arrests and throws in jail*
*Breaks out of jail, hurls dozens of flaming dead babies at Bondfan, who then catches on fire and falls to the ground, dead.*
*talonsofpeace formally charged with manslaughter, arson and baby burning. Put on death row. BondFan recovers in hospital, and vows to ban all baby burning*
*Throws a burning talonsofpeace at BondFan*
*Jurgen killed by accident when engulfed in flames. Plunges screaming to his death off a 32 storey building. BondFan has minor burn.*
*kills talons of peace…plain and simple*
*BondFan aims sniper rifle and…*
sorry, I am Hiro Nakamura, I bend time and space. *freezes time, teleports to BondFan, teleports him back…in front of bullet…..*
you’re not dead yet, you can still negotiate…
Alright! Let us be partners, abstract. Partners in time.
*Puts down gun*
I mean no harm.
*removes BondFan from path of bullet, unfreezes time* So, what is our first order of business as partners?
Hey, Mr Hero, can you go back in time and save me from jumping from a 22 storey building?
Ps:Heroes coming back 25th september. Yeahhh baby!
*Masterbates*
Even if he could, he would be hard-pressed to come up with a good reason to do so.
Indeed…Hiro works only for the greater good.
*Narrator’s voice*
And so, Hiro and BondFan became partners in time, fighting crime.
marriage=WIN
problems with commitment=FAIL
single? sounds like there’s a graveyard you should visit.
Kudos to the girl. Very high pressure situation but she handled it with a lot of class.
Class would be laughing him in the face.
Mediocre would be her.
It would be class, but definitely lower class.
Class would have been to accept (temporarily) the proposal so the poor guy wouldn’t fail publically. All women (ALL OF THEM!) should realise that us blokes have a difficult time as it is selecting a ring, kneeling down and all that crap. All you birds have to say is “yes” or “no”. Ungrateful wench should’ve let him down easy.
Oh, and DEAD BABIES!
Yeah, we gots it easy with proposals but I have two words for you: child birth.
Although I agree with you about sparing him the public humiliation, he should have thought it through as well… It strikes me as being a bit desperate, to put that much pressure on her hoping she’d say yes.
I don’t know, they both should have been a bit more aware of what they were doing.
Must resist the urge to make a dead baby joke.
Must…. resist…
What’s pink and silver and runs round bumping into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.
Now that was sick! sick! sick! How could you?! Urgh, that will give me nightmares for several days. You sick minded b*stard! You should be ashamed of yourself.
rofl, lmfao, and trying desperately to keep it quiet…still at work
I’m so glad you were able to resist the temptation to do so.
What type of baby?
I didn’t think human babies could walk, let alone run.
Whats more fun than spinning babies around on a washing line?
Stopping them with a shovel
Actually I disagree with you on this one. And I’m a guy. All he had to do was NOT propose in front of tens of thousands of people and he would have been saved a LOT of embarrassment. His main failure is in his sheer lack of intelligence in planning for the worst.
No shit. I mean, what if she doesn’t even like basketball?! Or that he’s asked her before, she said no before, and now he’s just annoying her?
He deserves it.
(I am female, and nothing would piss me off more than to be put on the spot in front of the whole country [tv and all] for one of the most special moments in life. He deserves it)
Aye, it is very difficult, even when he knows the woman will say yes. Which, by the way, the two of them should have been talking that over long beforehand and known already that she would say yes. Especially at such a public venue.
As women, we cannot lie in that one precious moment, just to make him look good. We are not pieces of bling to be worn and screwed. It would be the worst lie she ever told herself if she had. It’s unfortunate for both of them, I hope they give it another chance.
No. Yes, proposing is difficult, but no one should put someone else publicly on the spot as he did. All women should avoid this weasel.
What a bitch.
Not really. She just didn’t love him that way. At least she tried to say no quietly rather then a loud “Hell no!”
Nazi!!!
I beg to differ. Don’t make the guy look like an ass unless you truly hate him. She should have accepted the ring then break up later in private (and return ring). At least she could spare him some dignity.
I beg to differ. If a guy (or a woman, for that matter) chooses to make himself look like an ass, and voluntarily throws his dignity out the window, it is not the woman’s responsibility to make him look good.
Hypothetically speaking, of course, since it seems this is not a “real” situation.
No, she’s not a bitch. He tried to use social pressure and pity to get her to accept. I’d be proud of any of my female friends who would and could stand up against that as she did.
Oh man, there’s just no way to recover from that level of humiliation.
Except for one: alcohol.
..and suicide.
I would suggest a combination of alcohol and drugs, followed by suicide, for optimal outcome.
And masturbation, don’t underestimate masturbation!
Yes, especially when you’re masturbating your wife. Oh wait, he doesn’t have one.
Wow… three hours and that’s the only witty response you could think up?
“witty”?
.
I think you misspelled “pathetic”.
WIN!
did you see someone give him a beer man he definatly needed it
Ever seen a movie called “Dirty Work”?
i can think of a few ways…
Ye fat!
Yet another announcer jinx.
I was thinking the same thing – could just as easily be called “Announcer Fail!”
She’s a bitch and he’s an alcoholic. He had a beer in his hand within a minute of being denied. Depression fail.
Maybe he was thirsty. Public speaking always leaves me parched.
That could have been a sympathy beer someone gave him.
why is she a bitch? just because a guy proposes, does the woman HAVe to accept? and it might be more hurtful if she said yes just to keep up appearances, then said no in private…
also, having a beer when you just had your heart crushed is not alcoholism. having 10 beers every night because your life sucks, that might be…
She’s a bitch by default for being a female. FTW THE LOTTERY!!
Is it any mystery as to why you are always having to masturbate?
Na, I do it myself the best.
*Masturbates*
And you’d be comparing this to… your other hand?
burn!!
Dissed!
Why I oughtta…
*Takes out bazooka, blows Jurgen’s brains out*
Wait – I wanted to ask him a question!
*Runs over to Jurgen’s bleeding, gory body*
Dammit.
No no…you have the right idea.
Just take out the “to”.
“and it might be more hurtful if she said yes just to keep up appearances, then said no in private…”
LOL!
She’s a bitch. When I propose to bitches, bitches better say yes, or they’re going to get a serious downpour of dead baby rain. Serious. This is all such super serious business.
If the bitches better say yes, then she isn’t a bitch, cause she said no.
confusion, ftf?
ayup, dead baby rain of wrath……you’r starting to grow on me with all the dead baby business, it’s kind of funny…
Or having ten beers every night because she did say yes and now is making your life miserable…THAT’S alcoholism.
How do this without being sure she will say “YES!” ?
So sad…
He probably WAS sure. Some people are clueless. Like people who think it’s really romantic to propose to a girl in the middle of a basketball court with a giant mouse watching and egging on the crowd. Laaaaaaaaaame!
I think a lot of guys tend to be clueless. Many of them get egged on by their friends, and they think they’ve got a girl for sure…There was a guy that even said to my friend that his friends told him he had a huge chance, and he was all expectant, then she went all “Do your friends even know me?”
XD.
Alcoholism win?
Let this be a reminder to you all…
You NEVER ask a woman to marry you (especially not in front of a crowd) unless you are absolutely sure of the response.
The guy was probably sure, so you see, your point is invalid. The solution? You NEVER ask a women to marry you, regardless of what. Just hump them. Do that all day.
“a woman”: Jurgen’s pet name for his fist.
or his name for his pet
It’s what he named his rubber fist, you mean? The slightly stained one?
Considering Jurgen’s habits I’d say it was more then slightly.
Lol…
Suddenly putting giving a ring to your partner takes on a whole new meaning
Feeling particularly gerundial today, Shadow-sweets? :p
Yes, I know.
I have words, and I plan to use them, damn it!
Heeeeeeeeeeeeee…
*removes superfluous gerund*
“But Rosie you’re all right — you wear my ring
When you hold me tight — Rosie that’s my thing”
-Jackson Browne
Yeah, he should have just asked a dude.
Was I the only one who thought for a moment there she MIGHT be a dude…
Yes. You were. Is there something you would like to announce to the group?
No, you weren’t the only one. I expected ‘her’ to pull off ‘her’ wig right after the camera zoomed in.
iawtc
Video FAIL.
Great reaction from girl – WIN!
Seriously, guys, DON’T propose in front of thousands of people. Is epic fail.
The girl said:
“Remember when I said to NEVER embarass me in public again, or you’d be sorry?”
What is it they say on Law & Order…Don’t ask a question if you don’t already know what the answer’s going to be?
Well the bitch was ugly anyway. I think he’s better off now.
And when I said the bitch was ugly I meant I’d hit her every day. Sometimes even twice a day.
And by ‘hit’ I mean ‘have sex with’.
So you think her knees are to sharp?
i guess from all the pervs visiting this site at least 80% :masturbate:d on the vid.
i didnt.
Why would you masturbate to this video when you have the picture just before this?
Because the video is MOVING. It’s like it’s alive and you can almost feel it.
*masturbates again*
Masturbates? *masturbates*
The fact that you didn’t masturbate to the video, makes you one of the remaining 20% of perverts.
You’re still a perv though.
Still, a closet pervert is better than an active one.
I call them hypocrites.
And a hypocrite pervert is worse than a regular one where I’m from.
*Head explodes from confusion*
there is actually a small number of non pervs here. including me ofc.
lets say its 1%.
so from the 99% of perverted failblog users 80% :masturbate:d on this video.
are you happy now?
If there’s one thing programming taught me, it’s to test your shit before going public.
Well if you learned stuff from programming you’re probably the kind of guy shouldn’t worry about proposal fails. That’s because they’ll all reject you on way before you get to that.
extreme pwnage!!
I wonder if anyone warned him that this was a stupid idea? I mean romance is overrated, but this veers wildly into the realm of negative romance. He might as well have given her a Cleveland Steamer at centre court. Thumbs up to her for putting her own public humiliation aside to try to lessen his. It must really be love.
stfu buddy. Seriously.
A troll is to be ignored, my friend. The failblogger you told to shut his/her f*cking face is a troll. Probably. Indefintely.
*Punched by racoon1 anyway*
I FAILed.
I agree with said troll and at least she (in the video) was sympathetic to the guy’s feelings.
Wait.. how is that in the least bit trollish?
Beats me. I thought you had a good point.
Anyone else think this is fake? Those two aren’t very good actors. Could be wrong, though.
Hokay, so here’s the thing. I showed this to my husband, who immediately said “It’s a fake” and that they talked about it afterwards. So I decided to see for myself before posting about how sad it was (as many have done here).
So I found this: http://www.nba.com/wizards/news/spoof_proposal040225.html
Basically, it says that it was a spoof.
However, the picture that it shows (and many other sites show) is not the same as what is shown in this video. So… I am left unsure.
Ignore the picture, that was for a different team entirely, that should have clued you in.
there there…
there there…
it’s ok… it’a all gonna be just fine
there there
there there
No. . it’s NOT going to be fine. There there there there there’s going to be much tumult and FAIL.
the proposal was actually staged during the break of that nba game. I don’t remember which teams played, but i know the “proposal” was there just to kill time.
That was a different game. In that one the guy jumped out of a box or something. I think this one is legit.
reality fail
lol the one commentator can look into the future!
I don’t know how to say it in english… so… “se fodeu!!! hahahah”
so u “like big cocks” ah? naughty naughty!
Vai se foder.(portuguese)
Go f yourself(english)
See, that is why you test the waters beforehand. Watch a movie where someone does that, then ask “Could you imagine if I did that? Ha ha!” if her reaction is to start sharpening a knife, decide to propose another way. If her reaction is “HELL YEAH! WOOO!!!!”, starts jumping around exuberantly, and there isn’t an over abundance of Sarcasm… then you might have a shot.
Kudos to her, bad him for not making sure she’d say yes first, and looks like they are both single NOW! ha!
OWNED!(?)
She pretty much proved SHE’S not owned.
Well, at least Houston was winning.
w00t!
Hardly counts since they were playing Sacramento.
JUST FAIL? more like UBER FAIL !
Failland, Failland Uber alles…
Helloooo? German national anthem? Deutschland (sp.)?
*über
Deutschland, Deutschland über alles,,
Über alles in der Welt,
Wenn es stets zu Schutz und Trutze
Brüderlich zusammenhält,
Von der Maas bis an die Memel,
Von der Etsch bis an den Belt
Deutschland, Deutschland über alles
Über alles in der Welt.
Yeah, yeah, I forgot the German punctuation. I still get a cookie, don’t I? DON’T I?
No, but you can have some black forest cake.
mmmmm….Schwarzwald Kirschtorte
gesundheit.
Cummerbund.
sounds like a bund of joy
Bundt of joy?
Bunk of joy?
You take the cake!
(Just don’t mistake it for cheesecake.)
can i haz cake and poke it too?
:]
I’m serious!
Tonight we’re gonna party like it’s 1789!
Ich bin ein BondFan!
…Hold it, why do I sense a connection between the French Revolution and 1789?
A man shall not live by bread alone.
youll get a cookie if you call him a nazi.
“Ich bin ein Berliner!”
OK, no cookie. How about a jelly donut?
*waits for the “jelly donut? :masturbates:”*
Guys, that text is actually not used anymore. It is the old first verse of the anthem, popular during Nazi time, as it calls for “germany above everything”and within borders that nowadays belong to countries like Italy and Danmark.
OWNED
)
your 16 minutes too late mate.
*slaps lawl with a herring*
*slaps dragonwriter with a whale*
slaps both of you with a giant Cthullu.
Jesus hurt me! *sadface* *tells his jew-friends*
nah I was just messing!- come on don’t tell them..again…we were just playing…aww sh*t. If i get crucified again….
Yeah, but just think of the view.
that would make a nice background for a wedding-photo though.
Is there any other kind?
At least he win a beer, yohaiiiiii!!!
Past tense = won.
*Grammer Nazi salute*
sorry, another grammar FAIL
*Executes self*
The Rockets actually admitted it was staged.
http://www.fanhouse.com/2008/02/18/where-failed-marriage-proposals-happen/
Thank you for posting this. I was feeling really bad for that guy.
But are we sure that the commenter, Jay Houston, who made everyone aware of the *skit*, didn’t just make that excuse up to help the poor guy save face?
if you actually go to that link you will see that Jay Houston did not make it up.
I did go to the link (where do you think I got the name?), but how does going to the link prove that he’s not wrong or lying?
hopefully it will make for a good public service announcement: don’t propose in front of thousands of people.
You know you failed miserably when the mascot is trying to comfort you.
clever way to get a free beer !!
What do you expect when you put an obviously freaked-out woman on the spot? Frickin’ idiot.
Maybe one of the BEST fail EVAR!!!! x)
this is love
but luckly he got a beer.
Actually, this whole proposal was staged. It was fake. The girl and guy are actually friends, and wanted to see the public empathize with someone when they’re publicly humiliated. It’s like when the announcer says he’d like to see her say no, it’s because it never happens. And th couple thought it’d be funny to actually see someone say no.
Yeah, that’s romance for you.
I dunno, looks like went in proposing marriage to his girlfriend and came home with someone in a plush animal costume – some people get off on that.
cosplay
Two acting fails and many failures to recognize bad acting.
i’m feeling sorry for that guy…..can’t laugh about him…
I don’t: he did it specifically to make it impossible for her to say no without being the “bad guy”. He did it so that if she said no, he’d be the wah wah poor, poor put-upon male hurt by the EVIL BITCH.
He’s an attention whore. If he really wanted to marry her, he’d ask her in private. This was all about him, and an immature, self-centered gesture.
I agree, Charlene. I once had a (stupid) boyfriend who did something like this to me. On Christmas morning, in front of all his out-of-town relatives, while his mother was filming the ‘gift opening’, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. We’d only been dating 3 months, and I saw it as a skeevy, manipulative ploy. So now it’s all on film: the look of horror on my face, the fact that I almost barfed on the gifts, and my resounding ‘NEVER!’. His entire family was scandalized, and I never saw him again (although I’d pay money to see that video now that enough time has passed that I can laugh about it). Proposals are very personal and should be done in private.
Yeah, I’m with the commentator — I’ve been waiting for someone to do that.
If someone did that to me, even if I *had* been willing to say yes before, I woulda said no at that point. It’s massively unfair to do that to someone.
I hope your future husband has diamonds for family jewels, otherwise you’re gonna break ‘em.
Obviously you have rock for brains if you don’t think that was immature attention-whoring (and sympathy-whoring) of the first degree on the part of that guy.
She says yes, he wins because he’s getting married! She says no, he wins because she’s the evil one!
You are either very naive or very stupid.
Those are not necessarily self-exclusive properties.
But I didn’t say or indicate in any way that I didn’t think otherwise. Logic fail.
Men believe that women want to be proposed to in “special” ways, and they’d be correct more often than not. The desire to propose in a manner to her liking doesn’t always translate into appropriate action. Assuming that the man already knew the answer was yes, the only thing he managed to do was to grossly miscalculate his beloved’s desire (and to run some ideas by her friends).
Saying no to marriage to someone that you were previously going to say yes to out of spite, is another thing altogether.
Kevin Nealon’s character, Doug, on Weeds, has a term for such a spiteful person. It involves juggling and thunder.
And there are people who worry that gay marriages are going to ruin the institution.
A single public display of affection is all it takes to kill a relationship that otherwise was bound for lifetime commitment? That’s insane. You know that, right?
Seems like there’s not much left to ruin.
That was the best outcome possible. Any man the proposes, or marries is an idiot. Marriage means nothing any more, all it does is screw the man over when the woman leaves him. GUESS WHAT GUYS? You can live with a woman, get sex and even raise a family all without giving her legal claim to your money.
Child support responsibility does not depend on a legal marriage.
And neither does spousal support should you be together for a legally determined period of time.
Child support yes. Spousal support? You must be talking about common law marriage. That only applies if you are dumb enough to live in a state that recognizes common law marriage. I don’t. Plus, even if you live in a common law state the solution is simple. You have to dumb the broad before the time limit is up.
Lol, meant “dump the broad”.
“You have to dumb the broad before the time limit is up.”
.
Somehow I don’t think you have to worry about the time limit.
Ummmm…yah. Agreed. Totally. Absolutely. Quite. Indubitably.
… Yes.
“Somehow I don’t think you have to worry about the time limit.”
You’re right I don’t, I don’t live in a common law marriage state.
BWUAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!
*ahem*
S’cuse me. Funniest thing I’ve read all day.
You just have to realize that not all men are willing to marry women
who only want to screw them over and steal their lives. And that is
90+% of the women in the US today. They are all out to make a score.
Oh, I’m very familiar with your misogynistic viewpoint. I’ve heard it before.
*snore*
I’m still laughing at you, though. As are the two other people here who totally and completely burned you without you even noticing.
Oh I noticed the comment that I don’t have to worry the time limit, implying that no woman would stay with me that long. That’s why I followed my reply with the winking smilie. Or perhaps you didn’t notice. As far as “totally and completely burned you” goes, that burn was lame at best. It was right up there with “I know you are but what am I.” Typical Feminazi bull, can’t refute the truth so you call names and make third grader retorts. Next you’ll make comments about the tiny size my penis must be. I’m very familiar with your militant feminist viewpoint. I’ve heard it before.
Because I call you a misogynist, which you have clearly demonstrated that you are, that makes me a militant feminist?
Your logic is…truly stunning.
And in case you didn’t notice, the burn wasn’t mine. It was raelalt’s. So I do believe you just called him a “Feminazi” and insulted his maturity. I just laughed at it, and at your ignorance.
Yes I noticed that it was raelalt’s. I also noticed you taking credit for it “I’m still laughing at you, though. As are the two other people here who totally and completely burned you without you even noticing.” Implying that all three of you “burned” me. As far as raelalt being a man, that changes nothing a lot of men are dumb enough to buy into and support the feminist brainwashing. Since you agree with and, took credit for, his “burn” my reply applies to you as well. As far as ignorant goes, if you can’t see the truth all around you then you are the ignorant one. Or in denial.
Your point about credit would be true, had I not been referring to the post
where I was actually laughing at you (as evidenced by my statement that I was “still” laughing at you), thereby drawing attention to the fact that you had missed the point of hisoriginal comment.
And I’m pretty sure that your definition of “feminism” is very different from mine. As is your definition of truth. And I’m quite, quite comfortable with that.
If you think laughing at someone constitutes a burn, then you truly are ignorant. So, either you are just backpedaling or really need to learn what a term means before you start using it. But by all means keep your head buried in the sand and refuse to acknowledge what is evident all around you. How many men have you screwed over and robbed blind? From how many men have you stolen away their children? How about your mother, sisters, aunts, neighbors and friends? I’ll bet far more then haven’t. No need to answer, you probably wouldn’t tell the truth anyway.
mi·sog·y·ny /mɪˈsɒdʒəni, maɪ-/
–noun
hatred, dislike, or mistrust of women.
mi·sog·y·nist (mĭ-sŏj’ə-nĭst)
n. One who hates women.
adj. Of or characterized by a hatred of women.
Tell me again that I was calling you childish names?
I truly, truly pity you.
Guess what guys? You can commit to a woman FOR LIFE, and have her do the same in return, meaning that your kids will grow up in a stable environment and not grow up screwed in the head. Claim to your money is irrelevant if you don’t separate.
And yes, public proposals are stupid, because they’re trying to force a “yes”. My husband cooked dinner for me, cracked a bubbly and proposed in private. Much more meaningful.
Wow, what a low respect for eternal love. Maybe some men are in relationships for more than just sex and babies. There’s more to life than your short-sightedness, and marriage is a symbol of that.
Now, the people who marry and don’t do it for the right reasons, we can both agree, fail.
He should have known better than to propose to his own sister but it appears she set him straight.
That’s his sister? She looks more manly than he does!
I think I read somewhere that this was a publicity stunt. I have no idea what it was promoting, but I think it was fake. It’s not fair to corner a girl in a public place like that, most women feel obligated to accept even if they don’t want to. Good for her for saying no when she didn’t want to.
I really hope this was actually staged. If it’s real, I feel terrible for the couple that their humiliation didn’t end at the basketball game, but continues all over the internet. I think it would be a little indecent to continue to spread a real video like this around.
Yes, and since decency runs the internet…
As a consolation, they might get to be part of a Weezer video some day.
I love how the announcer’s like “he’ll get over it on 10-12 years.” Not with it being on the internet for his friends to bring up FOREVER!
“Hey aren’t you that guy from fail proposal on failblog?”
Announcer, FTW!!
i want half!
The irony is that someone such as I, who have never proposed to a woman in my life – nor do I ever intend to – is regarded by by far the largest proportion of the female population as being “commitment phobic.”
To which I typically respond by pointing out the natural, and healthy, human aversion to being committed …
again with the antique stale staged video and the insensate moderators…
Am I the only one who heard the sportscasters saying it was a prank?
yes. You have the ears of angels. whore angels from the future.
Are they EEEEEEEEVIL whore angels??
I heard it too. This fake proposal fail thing is a new trend in the NBA for some reason.
Those two sport reporter guys are WIN.
Poor guy.
wow… poor both of em… for the girl, that can’t be easy to do in public… now I’m not a big sports fan save maybe the world cup or the olympics… but proposing to your wife on the court of a f**king basketball arena sounds like… about as tragically distant from romantic as you could possibly get… no wonder she said no.
Tell the married couples they got it backwards; you propose after you are man and wife.
LOL nice
This is actually fake. It was the television broadcastings way of gaining more viewers and a publicity stunt.
LAST !!!!!!!!!!!!!
world-ending-at-7:40 fail
This is a local channel for me!!
I’m so proud lol
oh yeah and SUCKS for him… but he should’ve been sure first.
Post that mascot bear failing again, make it a hat trick!
Im not sure which person is more humiliated/embarrassed! If I were the girl, Id be more embarrassed about walking off the court after saying no… but the guy has to be pretty darn mortified about getting turned down. O.o
“She” looks like a dude to me.
Fake, like photoshop fhake.
fyi, this was a stunt for the game.
I’d say this is a proposal WIN and a refusal FAIL.
Hehehe!
I remember watching this on TV and laughing SO hard. Everyone was talking about it the next day at school because our town’s team was playing in that game.
its a win for the commentator cuz he just said ” i wanna see someone say no” or sth … ^^
This was a stunt pulled for half-time entertainment. The announcers even say it was a prank before Valentines day in the video.
Fail to read the comments before commenting fails. Redundancy wins.
Bad actors!
The buzzer at that critical moment was awesome.
Besides, if she accepts, then breaks it off, legally she can keep the ring.
The 2004 game described in the article here:
http://www.nba.com/wizards/news/spoof_proposal040225.html
took place between the Wizards and the Pacers, not the Rockets. The court and the uniforms in our Fail say Rockets.
The Wizards and the MCI center are in Washington,DC – “news10.net” is located in Sacremento, CA.
I emailed the TV station to see if they can answer the question. It might be fake, but it’s been a fun look at “reality” on the internet, either way.
The station emailed me back today and confirmed that it IS, in very fact, a staged proposal.
Alas, internets. Even your lies are lies!
OMG !
look at this stupid looser .
he does not even knows how to ask something …
oh , and marriage sucks
Win! Fake fail for free beer!
RE-RE-RE-REJECTEd!!!
Awwww…. I really feel for him. It takes guts to be turned down in front of millions of people – heck, I’d head straight for the booze too! Poor little tyke!
hahaha….*REJECTED!* i think its almost egotistical when people propose in that manner…i think a proposal should be private…
Sad sad sad, , you KNOW the a$$h0le proposed in public for the sole purpose of pressuring her into it. NOBODY with the slightest brain proposes in public like that, , it only happens as a proposal ANNOUNCEMENT. I would be the douchebag didn’t think she’d say yes, , so he tried to “corner” her with a public proposal. She did the right thing.
If I were her, even if I wanted to say yes, I would’ve just said no to him on live television just to show him how lame it was for him to propose in front of million of people. Then later I probably would’ve said yes.
What a C-U-N-T! I’d tell the B1itch to never speak to me again.
Oh man – that is harsh. I wonder if he stayed for the rest of the game and got totally shit faced.
The guy shouldn’t have proposed in such a public place. It’s like there’s this outside pressure for her to say yes… But she didn’t and now it’s backfired on him… Nice work with the mascot trying to comfort him though!
I wish there were subtitles to what she said exactly 0_o
WHAT A BITCH!?
Poor pup
pwned
Damn…
Would have been funny if the mascot was a chick and they hooked up.
oh my, thats so sad
That poor bastard! – the crowd should have really booed at her!!
FAIL!
All the money who he expend…and the shame… really sorry for that guy.
B3asht
I was at that game here in Houston. He said that those had been the most amazing 5 weeks of his life. Most people in the staduim fell over laughing. And not only did she run from the court, she ran from the building.
Stupid bitch! At least she should’ have pretended to have accepted and not making the guy loook like a idiot. Hope that she never get married and if she is already married, hope her husband torture her for life.
“Sad sad sad, , you KNOW the a$$h0le proposed in public for the sole purpose of pressuring her into it. NOBODY with the slightest brain proposes in public like that, , it only happens as a proposal ANNOUNCEMENT. I would be the douchebag didn’t think she’d say yes, , so he tried to “corner” her with a public proposal. She did the right thing.”
What makes you so sure that he intended to “corner” her to say yes? You probably are just a whore that doesn’t know true love and sleeps with a different person each night, hope you die from AIDS you idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its funny how the announcers are laughing at the poor sap’s misfortune. Lololol.
OH NO!!!!! OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This has probably been said before, but -
Is that the same mascot from the previous fail videos? He’s must be the unluckiest being alive.
Fuck the bitch man if she refused you in a hole crowd of ppl then she is a fucking slut and deserves to fall off a cliff. If i where you i would have drop kicked the bitch in the face and hocked a loogie in here mouth. Fuck teh bitch!
and that my friends is why you never ask a girl to marry you in public.
Omg.. Wow I would… I would just cry… Right then and there I would just… wow
Is it me or was that guy Turtle from Entourage?
OMG too bad. he will go curl up in a corner and die because of that
There is a reason why she said no, she was trying to explain it to the guy and I just do not want to reveal her secret.
the man was later found dead in his studio apartment downtown.
You guys are all morons. That’s not a woman. It’s a man dressed up as one. Look at the size of the hands. My bet is that it was some morning DJs pulling a prank.
Poor thing. I wonder if they’re together….
aww that poor bloke you have to feel for him
Nohing like a little shadenfreuden to brighten your day.
i seriously feel sorry for him
She is beautifully feminine…
…however, he is the ugly one.
…that one hurt my soul T_T
I love how the mascot tried to make him feel better, and they sent him off the court with a beer..
what a bitch….. saying NO to get gangbanged from alle players on the field *gg*
dont worry guyz… hes only gunna b scarred 4 life…. its not THAT bad….
“He’ll probably get over it in 12-12 years or so” xD GOGO MAKE FUN OF HIM. He shouldn’t propose when the chick’s been watching tall fit black people for the last 30 min or so (seeing how he’s an avarage, chubbu white guy).
Ummm i dont get it
I can’t beleve!!!!
lol…da buzzer went off lyke….”WRONG ANSWER!”…or “FAIL!”
HE IS ACTUALLY THE WINNER BECAUSE THAT “CHICK” IS A DUDE.
That sucks, but he deserved it for cornering her like that. I have to say that proposing in front of hundreds of people is the cheapest thing ever, cause she CAN’T say no without getting boo’ed and feeling like a bitch. It’s like, what if you don’t want to marry him? What, do you say “Yes” at first but then later in private say “Oh yeah, about that….No way, sorry dude. =D” then run off?
I applaud her for being brave and saying no. =)
hahahahahaha i love how the asshole in the audio room starts playing “love stinks”