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Cheezburger Network Blog
FIRST
*slaps BondFan*
With a fish?
Whatcha do that for?
*Slaps Loz with halibut*
*takes the halibut and returns it to the sea*
goodbye halibut!
*waving*
may you get catched again bye some chinese ship and be thrown in again
your existence had a meaning!!!!
…
I hope you get catched bye a chinese ship and shotten.
or shat on.
That too.
Or both?
gotta luv the way loz shits on love
that would be shitty wouldnt it
For the halibut.
Lol’d.
Waka waka.
Rada rada?
I smelt that one coming.
Get off your perch
Don’t be so crabby.
There’s something fishy about this whole thread.
Aww man, now I’m hungry.
this thread is taking off like a fish tail
Isn’t it obvious? You said the forbidden word.
No, fish have feelings too.
Fine then.
*Showers Loz with rubber fists*
*showers BondFan with free chunks of concrete*
Ow! Ow! Ow!
How about THIS!
*showers Loz with concrete and rubber fist mix*
That tickles. I like it.
And this?!
*showers Loz with billboards*
WHAT!
just wonder how many layers of replay of replay of replay can this blog support…
Ooooh…! You guys are showering together!
*sits down to watch*
*munchity-munchity*
showering together? its free amorous day~~~ (refer engrish)….
*reenacts herbal essences ad.*
Loz, send me the video of that, HUH? Pleeease!?
*Showers Rober Coleman with a bag of infant girls.*
^^^WTF???? I could swear I signed in as Goodnplenty, but my post came up as my email address, “beelzebabe.” How the heck did THAT happen?
*Tries to remember if she took her meds today…*
No, it IS ok to eat fish,
Cuz they DON’T have any feelings.
And raelalt would know, being a reincarnated haddock.
No, I HAD a haddock, but the Motrin(tm) help immensely.
That joke was a pain in the bass.
really? dont tell my pet fish who displays emotion. He might get upset.
You’re right, I guess I was just being shellfish about it.
I like how it says “was accused for rape and several accounts of sexuall assault” and then underneath it has a picture of miley cyrus “for just 9.99!”
They feel really good wriggling down your esophagus.
Yeah but I really hate it when they try to climb back up.
…TO FAIL!
Second!
*twiddles thumbs*
*Twiddles toes*
*twiddles nipples*
Shouldn’t that get you arrested?
Uh oh, here come the sirens…And its just4internetfame with a billy club!
Psh, he has no intent. He’s only in it for the fame.
*twiddles eyelids*
Dayum, you’re so beautiful when you do that.
*Takes out Walther PPK*
I have you where I want you, Miss Loz.
What’s that smirk for? You are now in the hands of MI6. Now, this chloroform rag should fit perfectly
Oh please don’t hur… *passes out*
*Drags Lolz off to Robert colemans rape shack.*
*drops free player piano on Brandon_ha*
*drops fairy on Brandon_ha*
Just to be safe…
*drops gas powered billy club on Brandon_ha*
*wakes up and kicks Brandon_ha in the balls*
ha ha.
Wanna borrow my boots…?
Just be careful…I think there’s still a smear of Dork on the bottom of the heel.
*bursts into commotion*
Hey guys, (insert catchpharse here)
(trolls who expect others to be funny for them wont nest below this level)
Random cuddle interference! *cuddles Dragonwriter and Loz*
*pokes Loz softly with billy club*
That’s better!
Have a toothpick to poke as well.
That feels good.
Bah!
What about this rusty nail?
I can go harder… *attaches toothpick to billy club*
Go on…
*cranks up gas powered billy club*
ouch. that’s just mean.
Alright. Just4, you’ll need a solar powered one.
Yeah gotta think green, besides it costs alot to run that one for long. *pushes a button on solar club* Hang on it’s gotta warm up.
*Gets a cup of tea*
I can wait
*looks nervously at watch before nervously biting off fingernails*
*beep* Oops I hit the wrong button! DUCK! *grinding noise followed by window crash from billy club shooting out the window*
*BondFan staggers from hiding place in cupboard*
What on earth…Right, you’re paying for that!
*waves smoke away* *cough* Hey it was your suggestion. Not my fault the company labeled it in that 61 language.
*just4 flees*
Wait! Come back here!
*Chase starts with attack helicopter*
*hides behind jesus sign, accidentaly kicking computer on the way in*
Jesus is the reason for the ERROR MESSAGE?!
Never mind.
*Fires two rather large rockets. Billboard blown to smithereens*
AH I’m naked! *waves white flag* I said sorry.
You two are so cute.
Wow, that was intricate!
you should write a book or make a movie or something… lol
i think it needs more references to previous fails
Dammit. I forgot the Prozac in the punchbowl again.
Please put a sticky on your frig for tomorrow.
Aww, but Dragon, it’s so much fun when you forget the prozac in the punchbowl.
the rpg chancre that is killing /fb/
*pops a bag of popcorn*
Mine!
*Snatches bag away*
Hey! I was going to share!
Oh!
*Returns bag and looks quite sheepish*
*Tries to avoid thepowerofblue’s glowering eyes*
*joins on the couch* ooh this should be good.
oh wait…
So, what are we watching again?
Oh, great. No show, and I’m the one stuck holding the bag.
Let me see the DVD collection you have there…
Let’s watch the Lion King.
de de de de de de de de de a whee um um a way!
Dammit now it’s stuck in my head.
Serves you right that you get infected by your own earworm.
The ciiircle of LIIIFFE!
The popcorn thing was MY idea, not yours, you dang little idea-thieving piles of… *stomps off infuriated and mumbling to himself about threats against failblog, thepowerofblue, and Orville Redenbacher…*
And I salute you for it, good sir. Consider my usage of it as a tribute to your genius.
Loz, send me the video of THAT, HUH? Pleeease!?
And HURRY!
Just in case the random posts from just4 & BondFan
got you as lost in the nesting as it did me.
The above is in reference to:
Loz
August 28th, 2008 at 4:10 am
*twiddles nipples*
I wishes a video of that… plus anything else [except Lion King].
Ok, I think I am in need of a cold shower. See you in a few minutes.
Tom, you’re really damn creepy. Please leave.
AND SECOND
Fail
I know.
*Cries quietly in the corner*
*comforts*
Awww…Thanks. Here, take my truck. I’ll give you a map, so you won’t crash into the train tracks.
Just don’t try to take his popcorn! :p
No comment, I’m trying to keep my anonymity.
A one, a two, and a one, two, THIRD!
DAMN!
Damn indeed.
*Pats on shoulder comfortingly*
I’m sorry…you guys are just too hilarious…
*wipes eyes*
Enough about this first second third shit! Aren’t we supposed to be commenting on the ridiculous FAIL by the retarded journalist?!
Yes we are. But we don’t want to. Because we are having FUN.
Good point, I’m just jealous I was ten minutes too late…
It’s never too late for ladies.
It’s never too late to start all over again.
What is there to say? Journalist obviously wasn’t listening in his legality classes at journalist school. I laughed more at ‘Sadline’. What a name to give a helpline.
You mean Sgt. Jason Sadline?
LOL. That’s even funnier than my misinterpretation.
It would have been even funnier if Jason Sadline was the journalist, no the cop. Then you would have a Sadline on the byline.
(LadiesTrolls won’t be happy below this level)
Second to comment your complaint!
(fail again)
why is this a “fail”? the name has not been revealed until charges were filed. now charges are filed, so the name is revealed. very logical conclusion…
epic fail on failers part, the story makes perfect sense and everyone who cant comprehend the english language has the Phail charges against them.
“Detectives say he ‘will’ be charged…” As it appears in the story, the charges have not yet been filed…
Read the entire article before trying to look smart by correcting the actual smart people who uploaded this FAIL, and the others who were correct in believing it.
tu est un jummy
lol xD
Weak fail. Name wasn’t released until charges were filed but the article says charges had been filed. Not anonymity fail, maybe tense fail for “has not been released” instead of “was not released”.
Fail fail.
Anyone else think this was some sort of Miley Cyrus Fail the first time around? I feel so dense and alone…
Did I miss a half-naked 15-year-old with a bedsheet? *checks glasses*
Uh, I wants a video of that TOO!
Methinks we have a peeping tom in our midst.
Oh? I thought failblog was mainly used by peeping toms.
Now kids. Stop all this Tom foolery this instant.
Yeah, quit it! Tom is my FRIEND!
Tomatillo salsa, anyone?
Erm…maybe they were talking about the person that filed charges against that dude…
Shit, read it wrong. That just…that’s EPIC fail…
You are an EPIC FAIL.
30 – 40 counts of rape?
OMG!
Gotta’ be pretty messed up for that.
You have to be pretty messed up for 1 count of rape.
By my math he’s at -10 counts. He’s got 10 to go just to get to zero.
Any judiciary system which sentences a man to commit acts of rape to clear his record is a system founded on WIN!
…Unless the guy is sentenced to rape ten men. Possible latent homosexuality aside, this would be a definitive case of Cruel and Unusual Punishment.
Wait. Damn. Misogyny Fail on my part.
*looks up definition of misogyny*
LOL. <3 you Shadow.
^.^ <3 you too.
Thanks for the entertainment Loz, Bond and Just4!! What I want to know is, he’s charged with 30-40 counts of rape with 5 girls that he babysat; so why did the parents keep on hiring him after the first time one of the girls said they had been raped??
Because she was in bed by 9.
I really shouldn’t have laughed at that…
He probably did the dishes too.
Good baby sitters are so hard to find on the weekend nowadays.
I’m not sure I’d hire a grown man to babysit my children. Doesn’t it seem weird for a grown man to want to babysit your kids, unless he’s a family friend and owes you a favor?
No. Most adults don’t actually want to have sex with your children.
A better question would be why did teenagers need a babysitter in the first place? By the time I was a teenager, I WAS the babysitter.
This site is usually pretty dead on, but this article contains no fail. The suspect’s name wasn’t released until charges were filed. The article clearly says he admitted to all charges. So, the charges were filed. = no fail.
Unless you mean the multiple counts of rape. That is legendary fail.
Where are you from, girl?
just because he admitted to the charges doesn’t mean they’ve been filed. the charges are probably just sitting on the desk still.
Perhaps he opened the forty lbs. box of rape near a schoolyard?
Dr. OCTOGONAPUS ! BLER!
Evil twin of Professor Breastagon!
Oh that had to be an intentional “Slip Up”.
Why are all these posters so immature?
because this is the internet.
They don’t ripen ’til early fall. But it’s been a dry summer, so they may not ripen at all.
it’s been pretty wet here
Yeah, but that’s ’cause of all the masturbation. *masturbates*
And sticky.
It’s actually an epic win… A child molestor doesn’t have a right for privacy!
No children mcnuggets for you buddy!
Wheres Chris Henson when you really need him?
I see a followup piece in the future about Coleman having been found dead in a gutter somewhere…
Wearing a bloodstained clown suit and a c*ckring made out of hannah montana’s face
Were no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do i
A full commitments what Im thinking of
You wouldnt get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand
* never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Weve know each other for so long
Your hearts been aching
But youre too shy to say it
Inside we both know whats been going on
We know the game and were gonna play it
And if you ask me how Im feeling
Dont tell me youre too blind to see
(* repeat)
Give you up. give you up
Give you up, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, give you up
Never gonna give
Never gonna give, five you up
I just wanna tell you how Im feeling
Gotta make you understand
(* repeat 3 times)
(* repeat 3 times)
.
Why? I couldn’t get through it the first time.
oh snap!
I gave up a long time ago.
lol fail hehehehe keke
Note to all those reading comphresion failures who are having trouble seeing the FAIL in this and think that the charges had already been filed:
The article clearly states: “Detectives say he will (notice the ‘WILL’ readers?) be charged with at least 30 to 40 counts of rape”.
Now can we move along?
(OK DragonWriter, do you still have some PROZAC to share? I may need some)
I have some good ol’ ho-made imitation Prozac, just like Mom used to make. Want some?
I think I’m better now, the cold shower that was triggered by the nipple tweaking earlier has calmed me down, thanks though.
Damn. All I have is some Prosaic. You can have some, but I warn you–it’s extra-ordinary strength.
Just ordinary Prosaic?
No…as I said, it’s EXTRA ordinary. With added ordinary. Can’t you read?
*thwacks raelalt with a trout*
(I can’t find my herring at the moment)
My shirt size is extra medium.
oh you want nipple tweaking? read the radient warrior series
(Timeliness Fail, I know)
Yeah, though if he already admitted to the charges, that should mean they’ve been filed. Still, the Today’s THV article explicitly says his name and “Charges are expected to be filed next week”. So his name was obviously out before the charged were filed, meaning it wasn’t an anonymity fail, but rather a we-shoulda-deleted-that-sentence fail. (Possibly a copy/paste fail?)
Article is http://www.todaysthv.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=69839&catid=2
LOL
i wonder what is the man name. oh wait robert coleman that means he paid the charge oh wait he dident
God, thats scary…thats my state and I have family in that town! I didn’t even hear about this until I saw it on here. Thats pretty sad…getting local news from failblog…
Lol – “sadline says if anyone has been a victim of failblog.org”
Well, that isn’t the only this on that page that’s a fail
miley cyrus = fail
Maybe the name given is a false one? Even if so, that would still be weird.