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Cheezburger Network Blog
That explains the permanent smile.
Yea dolphins love taking it up the dorsal after all.
that’s always been a fantasy of mine./
You need a Sex Doll Fin …
The post above me is PURE WIN!
That’s how they get that high pitched squeaking and chirping!
Kinda reminds me of that vase with the dolphins and the lovers… MUST… NOT… THINK… DIRTY…. ARGH I can’t do it!
4th!
1337th!
I heard that some nuns saw said vase in an art show and were offended until they were told that what you see in the vase is shaped by previous experience.
Ive never had the “experience” though O.o
For some reason, I want to know…
SECOND! CAN I GET A COOKIE AGAIN?!
no more fail You get cookies :[ I’m serious!
Fer srsly :[
But I want a cookies! I can haz cookies?! OMFGLOLZOMGFTWYouTubeEBAYYAHOOGOOGLE
We are sorry, but BondFan is undergoing maintenance.
we know because you fail!
ROB64: BondFan’s ship is in for maitenence
My god I have that game sitting in my basement gathering dust!!
fail you weren’t second l2/count
o rly?^^
Despite the comedy of buying this for your kids and laughing at their innocence (read: ignorance), who would spend $99 on a blanket with two duck-dolphin hybrids pounding each other in the ass(?)? That’s funny, but not $99 funny.
Unless it’s not in USD… could be another currency, since I doubt anyone is charging that much in USD or anything stronger for a bathmat.
Yeah, it´s not USD, but Czech money, 99 is equivalent to about $5, so I guess it might be worth laughing at kids´ innocence after all..
Well the american dollar is plummeting. In a few months you could be paying $99 for a beach mat!
No. They might be charging $99 for a beach mat, but I won’t be paying it.
I don’t think it’s THAT bad, but…
looks like romanian Lei, around 40-45 us, seems about right since stuff is about 120% the price in the states
Gotta be japanese.
Ahem…Japanese person in the room
AKA: ME
Well, I didn’t say you did it.
Still, I feel a bit insulted you decided to stereotype my nation.
Bah, calm down. I spent some time in Okinawa and saw stuff like this all the time. This is no where near as funny as the Hello Kitty and Whinnie the Pooh vibrators I’ve seen over there though.
Which reminds me. In a Tokyo store, I saw a toy of two dogs humping. Not only that, the toy was called ‘humping dogs’.
And I’m not trying to stereotype your nation, but alot of wierd sh*t has come outta Japan.
And alot of weird sh*t comes out of other countries too, like the US. cough *George W Bush* cough *Michael Jacson* cough *Hillary Clinton*
Bwahahah! Ok but the first and last of your examples can’t be classified as wierd sh*t, better classified as DUMB sh*t. But I can’t argue with Michael Jackson being wierd. He’s the only poor black boy who turned into a rich white woman.
Should have gone for a full dolphinoplasty.
It can be achieved relatively simply.
All you need is a scrotum to sew to your back to form a dorsal fin. And a large tank of salt water to use when going to the bathroom.
Sounds like you need some cough medicine
Anyone that has ever watched Japanese porn knows, , ,weird sh*t comes from Japan. .
*coughcornbratorcough*
I pwn you with my biggoron’s blade.
(Comments wont bukkake below this level)
…Did I really just type that? Dear God.
2 girls 1 cup?=D
no no no BME PAIN OLYMPICS!!!!!
haaaa….
I feel that I should inform you that the grammar police have been summoned for your use of “alot” instead of “a lot”. Run.
*flee*
*sirens and flashing lights*
it’s a high-speed chase!
Oh crap! It’s Loz! *lays down and surrenders* Please be gentle with the billy club. *tear*
OK son, get up off the ground and stop crying.
I’ll let you off this one time, but don’t do it again!
just4internetfame fought the law and Loz won…
Yeah my anal virginity is still in tact!
*high fives*
You shall not pass my electrified truncheon! Waitaminute-ARGH! *Twitch Twitch*
Anal virginity?
*masturbates*
You’d better start fleeing again, fame…when Loz sees that you wrote “in tact” rather than “intact”, she’s gonna get medieval on your ass.
in tact? in tact?!!
kiss that anal virginity goodbye, darlin’.
*lulz* Loz, you really are harsh to the point of cruelty… horrible, evil, hilarious cruelty. More than likely your words have sent hundreds of failblog users running into their rooms, crying.
Nah…but she’s sent Failbloggers running to their bunks to do something completely different…
Just ask fuzzy.
(not fuzz. fuzzy.
)
…or was it fluffy?
Dammit.
Just ask Loz’s girlfriend!
*mutters obscenities and stomps off*
‘Twas fluffy, I believe.
Oh I’ve sent more than just my girlfriend to their bunks
Dead Kennedy’s = Win?
Then his point is proven.
so his point IS pink jelly………….. I KNEW IT.
HONEY GO GET THE BANANAS
Can dolphins be Japanese?
No, he means the cutesy-hentai comnbination is Japanese. Which feels a teensy bit racist to me.
Is that what he means? Well knock me over with a feather!
Yes. I will accept the kind offer and blast you away with my new TungstenFeather 3000
“cringes and hides under table”
Ah, so you escape my feather. But you may not escape THE DALEKS! EXTERMINATE! E-X-T-E-R-M-I-N-A-T-E!!!
Quick! Everyone! Run for the stairs!
That only works for old school Daleks. New Daleks can fly. You need that crafty time shield to escape these days.
Correct, my knowledgable friend *ing-hey* *starts off with Proffesor Frink accent*. Daleks can now fly *glavin* and the only one who can stop them is the *hoy* Doctor.
I would say they could be but their tail fins are sideways, but that would make them sharks, *mumbling* and I wouldn’t wana sound racist.
Ugh. I prefer my dolphin in a can, not on my towel, TYVM….
Dolphin in a can: it’s tuna-safe!
Well, mating IS a wild animal’s main porpoise in life
I hereby revoke your crappy pun privileges.
Give them to me! *tries to think of something punny…*
*Slaps Loz up side of his head with a dolphin and revokes his crappy pun privileges as well*
her*
and damn, that dolphin slap was almost arousing.
Much more than I needed to know.
*steals back his crappy pun privileges while coyote is distracted*
I wonder if they’re practicing dophin safe sex…
practising* dolphin*
Pssst…Loz…we spell “practicing” with a “c”…
I just figured that it was one of those funky British spelling things.
Let’s all practice practicing: practicing practicing practicing practicing practicing practicing practicing practicing.
Are you serious?! You use practice as both the noun and the verb?!
Well failblog is certainly informative when it comes to American spellings.
Has someone got a fetish? TMI, my good friend.
TMI…? Oh, I’m sure he’s around here somewhere…
Tends to happen a lot eh. I think Loz doesn’t sound feminine or something. Hrmm Meditate about this I will.
How can I sound more feminine for you? Shall I talk about raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens?
Sound more pink, dammit!
I meant the name ‘Loz’ my darling.
Well this is an interesting development…I wonder if there’s a special fish that will alleviate that pesky “almost”…
*begins gathering various species of aquatic life to slap Loz with*
Psst. Try the electric eel.
good luck with that
So for now on is it Dolphin style.
Just be careful of the blowhole
Seriously now… that is just innocent and playful dolphin “HUMPING” action.
[For dolphins to be having actual sex they hafta be
in a "Missionary" type sex position, ie: belly to belly.
Don't y'all watch National Geographic specials ever?]
Only camels can have “humping” action.
I had forgotten things like this were fail-blog worthy.
Now I have to look into my “Notable Pictures” folder for that sign on an extended warranty for a Kodak disposable camera…
I love the splashes of “water” along the bottom of the towel. And the dophin on the bottom is freaking loving this, you can tell.
she is shouting while her partner splashes more “water”
I don’t know what’s more funny, the dolphins or the price, 99.00. I really hope thats not Euro or dollars…
Well dolphins are one of the few species that have sex for reasons besides mating.
How do they know this anyways? Kinky pregnant dolphin sex? Gay butt sex? And what does a dolphin one-night-stand look like?
I’m pretty sure that’s just an urban legend…
Well, we know this because dolphins have been observed having sex with each other a lot, even before they are old enough to reproduce. They give each other the dolphin equivalent of oral sex. Also, they have gay sex sometimes. Dolphins can also show sexual behavior toward other animals, including humans.
Sorry! TMI. I just watched some dolphin documentary on PBS. XD.
How do we know they are dolphins and not sperm whales that like to eat semen?
Is this a Moby Dick reference? Besides the whale doesn’t eat the seamen, just drowns them.
Who wouldn’t want two happy little dolphins on their beach mats?
So, is this the towel that talonsofpeace has been offering to masturbators recently?
Some towels Designer is having the laugh of his/her(yeah right) life now…
Aw, come on. I’d make a towel like that, and I’m a female.
Although, I’d just make it to see how many people would buy it…
Beach mat? Fail.
Sexual “subliminal” messages? Epic fucking win.
pun intended?
Kinda hot, I gues…
*guess
I fail at double consonants. -_-
You and me, baby, ain’t nothing but mammals
So let’s do it like they do it on the beach mat fail towel
When humans swim together with porpoises in captivity, it is not unusual for the male porpoises to get erections.
You must be joking. Seriously?
Yeah. John Lily and colleagues of his have commented on it in both research articles and in the popular press.
They also note that porpoises tend to get bored pretty quickly with humans if the humans don’t use a lot of creativity and changes when they play with them in the water.
Interesting.
“Play with them”?
Double-meaning WIN!
I wonder if they put that artwork on there by accident or on porpoise?
This picture fails to depict reality.
Dolphins don’t use sunscreen.
“Kids, this is how baby dolphins are made!”
*sings* So long and thanks for all the fish.
Parenthesized Caption WIN.
LOL!!!!!!