Submitted by Christina Kennedy
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Cheezburger Company Blog
FIRST!
Congrats…
*tumbleweed*
Damn I would have been first if his mother wasn’t so damn good in bed!! Damn it all!!
Jeez, double whammy. You didn’t get first and you have to hire a prostitute.
How do I nominate you two for a burn of the week?
conga rats
Can you nominate a burn and a counter-burn? I categorically state that that should be a new category!
what ever happened to burn of the week
Damnm, triple whammy. Missed first, wasted cash on Simmo’s whore mum, AND got dissed by Loz.
Thats gotta hurt.
One day I will be the greatest too
Why be a hero when you could be a zero?
______
When do we get to go to the shitty planet where I’m a hero?
This must be what going mad feels like…
Firefly WIN!
wow you prowed of your self…
SECOND!!!
IM SO HAPPY
I thought it was your dream to be first? Better luck next time
Idealism WIN!
first fail
Wow… That is one extreme sale!
Yeah … and if you divide the % OFF by itself, you get extreme INFINITY!
( … or extreme “undefined” … or, like you said, extreme “one” )
I get the “undefined” (anything divided by zero is undefined).
Even though it doesn’t actually work with zero, I get the “one” (something divided by itself is one).
But I DON’T get the infinity because zero divided by anything (other than zero) is zero, not infinity.
I mean, I DON’T get the “INFINITY” because zero divided by anything (other than zero) is ZERO, not infinity.
The smaller the denominator, or divisor, the greater the quotient, or result. As the denominator approaches zero, the resulting number approaches infinity. So, yes, dividing by zero “isn’t allowed,” i.e, it’s undefined. But if you snuck off and did it anyway, you’d get an infinity.
(It goes either way — nothing divided by anything is nothing; anything divided by nothing is infinity; so nothing divided by nothing is … nothing … and one … and everything.)
(btw, if you’re curious, the “circle” avatar image here happens to have a not dissimilar many-meaninged/ nothing special character — see the “definition” on the Billboard Fail thread, next)
._.
Anyone else starting to feel philosophical?
Fuzz has that effect. Well, or confusion.
uh, except the problem is that you’re going to be converging to +infinity or -infinity depending on which direction you’re approaching it from, so it’s undefined, NOT infinity in some bizarre other world you exist in.
*yawn*
… i am fairly confident that “i” am rather intimately and appreciatively engaged with the matter-of-fact suchness of here and now, before any such sophisticated “bizarrenesses” as words and philosophies and ego structures
.
care for some tea?
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
What does he end up with?
Hmmm.. That doesn’t look shopped at all…
You’re right. It doesn’t.
Your idiots look at the ground.
Oh, but by all temporal and username indications, YOUR IDIOTS — look at the thread … at 4:20 am and 4:36 am and 4:55 am and 5:18 am and 6:01 am and 8:32 am ….
I’m with fuzz on this one. YOUR IDIOTS!
wait… aren’t you idiots???
They are not my idiots. Or did you mean you’re?
But… But I don’t have any idiots… =’(
There seems to be plenty laying about, so help yourself.
Nope, not in the least.
That sign has always had plenty of room for another number and a discoloration on the left side.
Photoshop phail.
THIRD > second > first
GODDAMNIT!!
Hey…who posted this? Whoever it was didn’t sign his or her name…
Looks like it was some kinda preacher.
An imposter attempting to soil the good name of WilliamCA!
THIRD!!! I’ll take what i can get!
WilliamCA
Valuing useless achievements fail, failing to get them fail, signing your posts fail.
somebuddy jest got nom’d, nom’d, nom’d
It clearly says “Submitted by Josh W”
so…..
I don’t think it’s a fail. It appears the guy on top of the wall hasn’t finished yet. Or perhaps the first number fell down, it’s lying there, you know.
It would have been funny if there was nobody around.
Yep, agreed!
its still funny…
Yeah… I’m not really feelin’ this fail.
*feels Loz*
…Better?
*feels better*
wooot!
I haven’t been felt in a while.
There was a period that I was satin.
Common? COMMON???
I’ll have you know that I am a very uncommon hussy!
I was only joking, wee lass! You’re the most unusual hussy I’ve ever had!
…I think Loz just called me weird. Not to mention a hussy.
*thinks*
I can live with that! :p
She may have given you your goddess props:
That’s exactly the angle I was going for!
Hee…I was thinking of the “weird sisters”…but goddess works too!
*inserts the “from Macbeth” explanation after “weird sisters” in the above post*
Fair is foul and foul is fair, hover through the fog and filthy air?
*cuddles*
You scare me a little more every day.
C’mon Loz … everybody knows that.
*ducks*
*ducks* Fuzz! Don’t say something like that without warning me first! An innocent bystander, potentially caught in the cross-fire.
Ahem…
*fixes fuzz in a hypnotic dragon-gaze*
uh oh, she weighs less than a duck,
i fear i have no charm against this weirding
Oh, come on. Give it a try. I’ll bet you could charm your way out of this one.
(Charms won’t nest below this level)
*nests*
He stole me lucky charms!
(Loz won’t charm below this level)
Do you have a map? ‘Cause I keep getting lost in your eyes…
Alrighty, that was unexpected.
I’m scared of the consequences of asking your gender.
Phew. Sorry for that, it’s just that I suspect alot of people on failblog have *ahem* alternative lifestyles.
Well I do swing both ways. You got a problem with that?
No, no! I mean people of alternative lifestyles of the male gender! I’m fine with females. Not to be sexist or homophobic in any way. Have I touched a nerve? I’m sorry.
Communication with women FAIL.
Flirting FAIL.
No no, no nerve, my comment was meant to be taken humourously
I can deal with a bit of sexism. You chauvinist pig.
Right, newfaceinhell, your screen name is about to become literal if you do not retract your comment.
He probably dropped the first number making it a fail IMO.
It does look a bit like he dropped it. But that totally ruins the fun.
No, that just makes it all the more funny. Because he dropped it and so he’s like “CRAP! Now I gotta go down and get that!”
and if he bends over you know what those convicts will do
im-just-here appears green with envy,
no doubt wishing he-was-here in the receiving line
He loves a big bit of felon beef. It’s those stripes that drive him wild.
That looks like it’s adhesive vinyl… so he’s pretty much effed… it fell and stuck to itself… he’s up there probably cursing himself. Still a funny enough Fail
photoshop can help you to make this become a real fail…
I agree with Bo, it’s not a fail.
The Fail-shop sets sale again.
Nice secondhand comment you bought.
Zing!
10th! Woohoo! I got 10th place! Hurray! Hurr-waitaminute…
WTF?
Is this where they have that sweet deal on the guitar?
Thats a crowd puller that one.
15th!!!
I don’t think this is
1. a FAIL
2. a WIN
3. funny
I don’t think you are
1. over the age of 12
2. of a higher IQ than 90
3. funny
That response was
1. predictable
2. Futile
3. covered with rouge
4. fuzzy
5. generally conspicuous
6. Had 48 letters, 5 numbers, 3 periods and 1 apostrophe
7. No Pooftahs!
8. Poonhounds?
9. You DO NOT discuss Fight Club.
with slightly used rubber gloves
∞. You want to finish this off?
You rock =O
Not a sale fail, but definitely a fail at the moment the picture was taken. I’m assuming the point for the one sign was to adjust the percentage as needed – 30%, 40%, 100%…
100% off? Sweet!
After all, only the best things in life are free!
Bacon cheeseburgers aren’t free…
Apparently at Skip’s shop they are!
…and HERE’S how to get them! Send check or money order to…
I´m not first, but my avatar is cooler than yours.
you might be onto something
…Didn’t you mean to say, “on something”??
Who’s on first?
… And who’s dissin’ whose divinities?
… And who’s smokin’ Orugula?
Sweet fuzz…I’d never diss your sweet, rich, fluffy candy. Makes my mouth water too much!
Our avatars are waffle-ish. Actually, mine appears to be a cross between a waffle and a swastica.
Oh no! A Nazi! :-O
It’s a banner fail. I think that the bundle of white and red synthetic material on the pavement in front of the sign is actually the first digit of the number, which fell in the process of being posted/glued/whatever. Who’s with me?
shoobey, as usual, wins the prize for pointing out the obvious.
OOOOOUGH REEEHEHEHEEEEEALLY ?!
MEDIC!!!
we need new inspiration, we need support for a rebirth of creativity, a rinascimento of wit, a renaissance of ideas …
MEDICI !!
I’ve got nothing. Sorry.
niente? o poverino!
… but you still made me laugh! grazie
Respect are-country. Speak English.
Intriguing avatar, Rogue! *applauds*
3e, I vouche saaf, þou doþ spek sley3ly and verrily.
‘Swounds!
*swoons*
Morans.
I second the call for a medic. Shoobey appears to have fallen out of a bucket of grapes.
I… can’t… breathe!
I’m pretty sure I’m really really really dead.
Two previous fails combined! High-five, guys.
Who knows CPR?
I was there when they put up this sign akshuly and someone had stolen the first number.
Hey, I seem to have lost my thunder. You haven’t happened to see it lying around, have you?
No
Yeah. They made movie about it. Set in the Tropics.
I think it’s a sign guy fail because you can tell he’s disappointed in himself and the number. It has to make him feel worse that people are taking pictures of him.
Yeah he is like hanging over the edge ready to jump over.
I agree. You can tell he’s thinking “why do I even bother, I should’ve stuck with plumbing. I may as well end it all now.”
In wich case he is perfectly positioned to do so. All he needs to do is do a swan dive. Of course, the roof isn’t THAT far up, so there’s no garauntee that it’ll work.
Yeah, let’s face it, there’s nothing worse than a failed suicide attempt.
Suicide is against the law in a number of U.S. states.
.
(I know a physician who once told a failed suicide patient he was treating in the emergency room, “You know, suicide is illegal in this state.” It was in fact the truth, but the doctor was saying it to try to make a joke.
The patient, though, replied earnestly, “I wouldn’t've done it if I’d known that.” )
:[
Lol! That is hilarious. I find it amusing, too, that some countries (or states) make it illegal. As if that’s going to be any sort of deterrant.
After-life possibilities: heaven, hell or prison.
Well, it obviously can’t be illegal to commit. Attempted suicide is illegal. How do you give a dead guy a fair trial?
Ask that god dude, some folks tell me he’s pretty apt at judging dead guys.
One fine day in the middle of the night,
two dead boys got up to fight.
They pulled out their swords and shot each other.
A deaf policeman heard the noise
and came and shot the two dead boys.
Pedobear + necrophiliac. That cop is quite a guy!
or maybe he’s trying to be a hero, in forming another “O” to go with the one on the sign — a zero hero
____
He’s leading the way for the Zeros’ Rights/Awareness Movement all right!
What a pioneer, putting his life on the line for the cause!
Just because I’m a moran doesn’t mean I’m stupid!
What would be even funnier about the sign is if it actually boosted sales for that store!
In Soviet Russia, 0% IS a discount!
I’ll allow it.
Well I guess your mother couldn’t be any cheaper.
Cheaper? Heh, your mother’s free! [starts taking advantage]
I went to the store today. They were having a sale on everything. All the prices had been changed to exactly what they were before.
Well, obviously it was just installed when that photo was taken. The other number lies on the ground and the first digit can be changed to whatever the shop wants it to be.
Thats as dumb as if you photograph a half built building and call it “building fail”.
Failblog fail, once again.
Hailarious.
Failarious?
Failariousorous Rex?
-saurus. Correcting a non-existant word, new lows!
Like a beggar in the sand, with the sky in his hand.
____
You rattlesnake out with your tailfeathers high
Jitterbug left and smiled to the sky
With your black velvet cape, and your stove-pipe hat
Be-bop baby, the dance is where it’s at.
Ooh!
*sits down to watch Cowboy Be-Bop*
get off of me
“Boss, you know what you told me about falling prices? Well, y’know that modular banner you got? Seems our discounts want to join the prices. Yes, I know. Butterfingers is fired.”
Seward? Seward Alaska?
“What’s in a name? That which we call a Lolz
By any other name would smell the same as a Hugustus ass.”
That which we call a rose, by any other name would smell as sweet. <3
Yes, that IS what he was referring too… <_<
Oh, really? Amazing!
…
eat cake
okay <3
mmm, cake… *drool*
B0ll0cks. That is a photoshop job. I see no point in posting *fails* that are photosopped… I could PS anything to make it amusing.
This picture IN ITSELF is an EPIC FAIL!
That’s funny, ’cause I see no point in posting repetitive comments about how a fail is *not* a fail. Maybe you should head on over to morans.com.
i doubt you could make anything amusing.
Funny, but i’m sure i’ve seen this somewhere before..
EPIC photoshop fail. If your monitor is properly calibrated you can clearly see whoever did this used the clone tool to hide the first number, possibly a 5. The creases on the lower part of the fabric don’t look natural at all.
This one could go to Photoshop Disasters.
They went to all of the trouble to print up the main part of the banner and had not decided yet how much they were going to take off, other than some unit of ten? That’s business fail.
*** They went to all of the trouble to print up the main part of the banner and had not decided yet how much they were going to take off, other than some unit of ten? That’s business fail. ***
Uh, no they printed up a REUSABLE banner that they’ll use for multiple sales with multiple discount percentages.
You’re a real business genius, you are.
Sign hanging Fail
To be sure, to be sure. Irish swearing is top o’ the mornin’!
We use ‘top o’ the mornin’ as a greeting lol.
You idiots look at the rest of the banner on the ground. It’s not a photoshop, just unfinished!
photoshop fail…
Failure to look at photo closely and read previous comments fail.
all of you are dumb cause someone obviously photoshoped it
ur name says it all
hi!
oh this is so shopped that its not even funny
it is weird how these comments are never about the picture
it is weird how u posted a comment about the comments
without bothering to read the comments about the picture
What is this?! You can’t go on to the next page, there is just an seemingly endless line of mindless babble…..
It cost $18,500, but with this discount, your new total is… $18,500.
At least its not getting more expensive!