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Hard to decide.
Captain, do you like dicks? :O
No, but he LOVES me !!!!
and me!
SKRULL!!!!! o_O
Sure, Dick’s is a fine establishment.
I’ll be over at B.J’s.
thanks, Captain Obvious!!!
hey…. whaddabout me ?
haha haha ha
You said hard.
yeah, ‘hard’ is definitely not worth that last breath required for that final ‘ha’
I hear they are collaborating on a buy one, get one off sale.
username WIN
agreed. can we start a WIN of the week? just for that?
we should! the (wo)man deserves a prize.
I’m holding out for Commander Clear.
It says Fail on it
One stop shopping – WIN!
I think I’d need to make two stops.
Oh, I see what you mean.
Come again?!
You spelled it wrong.
Fail.
In no way was this a fail. You arbitrarily stating that it is a fail, is a fail. I award you no points and may god have mercy on your soul.
He didn’t spell it wrong. You fail. Suck it up
Well, he (Captain Weiner) may have spelled “come” incorrectly if First! is going for an alternate effect with the word come, which has a homonym (which I am desperately trying to avoid using) relating to both Dick’s and BJ’s.
Thanks for spelling it out for us But why? I had know idea what Fist! was getting at!
Overexplainatiamation FaIl
Umm. Did you see the comment that But why? is responding to?
Sarcasm Detection Fail
yes, but, ‘cum’ is not a legitimate word, unless it’s in the context of, for example “bedroom-cum-study”. that’s all i’m sayin’.
actually, it sort of is. The actual term for the liquid before the
semen is precum, so i suspect cum is a legitimate word.
hmm, well if it’s not in the dictionary it’s not a proper word!
LEXICON FAIL!!
Let me stop this ridiculous argument.
Just call it “semen”.
Or, if a verb, “ejaculate”.
:masterbates:
My God, at least have the decency to spell it correctly!
On a side note, do atheists say “Oh my God”? If they do, they’re kind of acknowledging that he exists.
my mom, an atheist, will often yell “jesus christ” or “god damn it” when she gets angry. i once asked her how much sense that made… she just got more pissed
should have seen how angry she got when she called me a son of a bitch, and i agreed
I’m agnostic and I say ‘oh my god’. It’s just a phrase of exclamation these days and I certainly don’t see it as actually relating to a deity lol.
lol you didnt just say “come again” to comment this picture did you?
HAHA !
Its BUFFALO NY!!!!
is that buffalo? on transit road?
I was thinking the same thing!
That totally HAS to be the Transit Rd one! I’ve always joked about that, but never thought to take a picture of it.
That is absolutely Transit Road in Buffalo. I used to work in a store in that same strip mall.
You fail for not taking a photo of this fail years ago. Photography fail. Not uploading fails to failblog fail. You all fail.
Oh go stand outside the fire, corky!
Are you the person who posted the pic?
Blame FAIL.
I have been wanting to photograph this for ages! Thanks. I used to work at the Wal-Mart further down.
I think so.
methinks… i was like, i totally know where that is lol
oh…. because of blow jobs and penises… i see.
very strange cure for blindness win
I’ve seen stranger things.
…your face? your webbed feet? your 14 fingers? your comment without humour or any point of interest perhaps?
Win!
You’re just mad because I single handedly ruined your joke!
i bet you used both hands
you are just trying to distract people from the fact you got burned so hard that the wicker man had to take a step back.
that’s what she said.
To be honest, i dont see a fail in there… or am i just blind?
Yes, or perhaps to ‘holy’ to see the fail.
even jesus could see that fail.
too
I apologize for my little fail
it’s just a pet peeve of mine is all.
And lack of capitalization is a pet peeve of mine.
the word pet peeve is one of those little things that bug me
Failure to pluralise correctly is one of those things that bugs me.
Failure to spell “pluralize” correctly irritates me.
He could be British, although, being American, I wouldn’t know
Practice=Practise
She, actually.
bugs is one of those thing that peeve me
something about soviet russia.
you know, i thought about that after i posted it- it could be “one (of those little things) that bugs me”
but what if i meant “one of those (little things that bug me)”? then it’s correct.
ambiguity of the language, i can argue myself right after the fact
or i might just not give a shit
Starting a sentence with a conjunction is a pet peeve of mine, and it’s improper grammar. You fail!
You may just be blind, HolyMaestro.
I’ll give you a hint… it’s a penis joke…
Not only that, but “BJ” can stand for “blow job,” meaning oral sex, which is where…
Aw, screw it, I think I’ve made my point.
Turn them around, got one lovely stop.
i see what you did there.
that really couldn’t be accidental now, could it?
Nope, people fail on purpose all the time.
I thought it was accidental until I went to Gloryhole’s around the corner.
Lol’d!
ROFL! I’m laughing at two things. That fact that that was funny, and the fact that i for a whole second i thought you were serious! XD I Epically Fail!
You didn’t fail alone. I was tempted to see if there really was a store called that.
Is that next to Anal Intercourse?
lol?
wonder what’s in between?
your mother.
spitroast, baby.
A liquor store!
with poker in the rear
She speaks puniards, and every word stabs.
( Speaks she thus, perchance she’s easy. )
Hopefully a condom store.
A hard place…
No, a soft place. It gets hard after some attention.
I’m not sure what’s in the middle, but there’s defiantly a condom machine there too
Unless they sell those inside as well
Perhaps a kisosk with a computer so you can order “used” condoms?
Reference to previous fail WIN
Not pictured is the carwash.
Actually this pic was taken from the car wash.
If you were getting a hand job, what were you doing taking pictures of the stripmall?
Planning my next course of action.
Didn’t you need to stop at Dicks first?
Indeed.
Nah, they don’t have anything I want at Dicks.
You sure about that?
I figured since your nick implies that you haven’t seen yours in a while, you might need a replacement.
he wanted 22 bucks for it, but i talked him down to 17
i don’t understand..
See, it’s a fail because both stores are incorrectly pluralizing the titles. It should be BJs and Dicks. See? Anyone?
lol.. it’s fail because BJ=BlowJob… you don’t even masturbate?
Sarcasm detection fail.
Stealth sarcasm win!
No . . . BJs and Dicks are pleural
The apostrophe between the name and the “s” is possessive
Still funnier Bobby’s way.
Understanding the joke fail. Didn’t the “See? Anyone?” part give that away? Anyone?
Apparently not.
bueller? bueller? bueller? anyone? anyone? bueller? anyone?
Movie reference WIN
Sarcasm fail
then u suck
So… I’d have to purchase a dick first, and then go to the other shop for a blowjob. Why is there no restaurant (for eating)? Female discrimination!
hmmm…you’re talking bout female discrimination, because there’s no food?=/
Joke-understanding fail.
I believe Bo meant “for eating out”.
A thousand pardons if this was too obvious.
And Loz beats me to it again! Sorry, I really must learn to type faster.
oh not to worry, your comment will serve to explain the joke for any other retards who should come along.
Yes, that was my little fail. I wrote ‘eating’ instead of ‘eating out’. I apologize. Still, it’s a much bigger fail not understanding the joke. It was pretty obvious…
Nah, ladies can get full satisfaction at Dick’s. Very popular for bachelorette parties.
ladies don’t need dicks to get satisfied, that’s just what guys like to tell themselves :p
I think you are doing it wrong then.
Nope
Ok… Your ‘guys’ are doing it wrong then.
I didn’t say dicks can’t satisfy a woman. Just that they aren’t necessary.
Touche’
No, touch. The right touch is what is required to satisfy a woman.
i like the idea but it’s just no so funny when its a photoshoped picture. Actually it’s just not funny. Funny-fail
Congratulations, jackass. If you had read Eric and Rick’s posts above, you would know that this is in fact an actual place, on the 5100 block of Transit Road in Buffalo, New York. Just because you’re so painfully cynical doesn’t mean that everything on Earth is photoshopped.
Attention-span Fail.
oh snap, smell the glove.
Is it covering a rubber fist?
With used condoms
Previous fail ref win!
not only BJ’s but WHOLESALE BJ’s!!! Buy in bulk for discount prices!!!
Can I be a pedant please? “BJ’s” has an apostrophe before the ’s’ so it means “belonging to BJ”. Therefore “Wholesale BJ’s” does NOT mean the plural of BJ.
I know I’m being a prick.
You’re No Prick, You are dick and if you don’t stop being one, I’ll sell you at Dick’s.
Who are you? Captain Obvious?
Way to ruin the humour. D;
Didn’t you hear the one about the dyslexic pimp? He bought a warehouse…
Eric-
It looks like Transit Road to me.
Title fail. A stripmall is not a stripmall without a stripclub.
Yeah, technically isn’t it an outlet mall?
In England it’s called ‘two shops next to each other’.
Silly Americans, making names for everything. Silly!
LOL. I’ve never even heard the word ’stripmall’ before.
Silly Americans, not knowing what your names for things are! Silly!
I’m not American…
Silly!
Oh, my apologies, good sir.
It appears that I am in fact the one who is silly.
…But not as silly as those silly Americans.
fail
good lady*
sillier and sillier!
Excuse me while I hit myself for being so silly.
Can I hit you too? This thread hurt my feel bads.
And now for something completely not retarded and not brought to you by limey Brits.
A man with three legs!
No no, it’s time for Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern -schplenden -schlitter -crasscrenbon -fried -digger -dangle -dungle -burstein -von -knacker -thrasher -apple -banger -horowitz -ticolensic -grander -knotty -spelltinkle -grandlich -grumblemeyer -spelterwasser -kürstlich -himbleeisen -bahnwagen -gutenabend -bitte -eine -nürnburger -bratwustle -gerspurten -mit -zweimache -luber -hundsfut -gumberaber -shönendanker -kalbsfleisch -mittler -raucher von Hautkopft… of Ulm. (Had to copy and paste lol).
.
(talons is developing a bit of a complex!)
You mean silly USAians?
Reference to previous fail and ensuing useless argument WIN!
Don’t you mean two “shoppes”?
no, Geoffrey Chaucer.
Don’t you mean “Jeffrey” ?
if that was some obscure joke i don’t get it lol. his name was spelt geoffrey.
The two are not mutually exclusive. Think of a Venn diagram.
Oh, okay.
Thank you.
Awesome!
It’s like a Mitch Hedberg standup routine. It’s so stupid, but he just keeps coming at you and eventually you break down and start laughing.
Making fun of the dead… have you no shame?
How is that making fun of him, retard? He’s one of my favorite comedians of all time, I was simply pointing out the sexual innuendo failblog posts chip away at you until you lose it and start laughing. Go take your two cents and drop them where somebody cares.
I believe that was a joke.. but thank you for explaining how the failblog posts need to abrade your sense of humour before you can laugh at the innuendos.
My pleasure.
You just described my last date!
A liquor store
Or a meaningful relationship store
wouldn’t that be one in the same?
In my town we have the same, only we also have a Seaman’s furniture next to the Dick’s. There is probably one at this location too, because I’ve found that where there are Dick’s and BJ’s theres bound to be a Seaman’s eventually.
Epic win.
Yes, eventually…
What town? I just posted below about our former Seaman’s in Mays Landing, NJ.
i assume one of the stores is for gay and women only
so for you and your mum then?
originality fail
you think using the word ‘fail’ is original? lol.
Burn.
Both of the stores are for gays. Duh.
I think this statement needs to be further quantified by ‘receiving’ and ‘giving’. While both stores could be for gays, the same could be said about straights.
Are you saying gays are the only ones allowed to get their… ummmm… hands on some dick?
No… I’m saying that gays (gay men) could both work and shop at both stores. Happily.
) (or should I say gaily?)
Ah! Thank you for the clarification
I once tried finding Dick’s Sporting Goods website and went to dicks.com. That was a mistake.
I told a friend about this (a software engineer) and he said he was looking up Linux documentation once and went to manpages.com. Apparently that was also a mistake.
great story!
*wishes he had a nickel for everyone who just browsed to dicks.com and manpages.com*
*browses*
… *masturbates*
err, manpages.com actually is a Linux site. Your friend must’ve failed.
This was years ago. Go look at archive.org’s records for manpages.com around 2000. He didn’t fail. Well he did, but not for the reason you say.
I once worked in a lab doing atherosclerosis research and had to look up “Stroke Magazine.” Apparently there are two.
The other was a magazine for rowing aficionados, right??
This looks like Consumer Square in Mays Landing, NJ. If it is, there used to be a Seaman’s Furniture to the right. Seriously. It’s no longer there, but it was the big joke — how could you put BJ’s, Dick’s, and Seaman’s all together like that? I know there are some witty retorts just waiting.
Still waiting…
It’ll come.
Hello? Anyone got anything witty to say? We could really use it. This is beginning to feel a bit awkward.
You were watching too hard and you missed it.
Missed because it came a little prematurely?
My wife is from the area. She told me the story once that the designer of the mall got screwed over somehow & so he put the three stores together. I wonder what took seamans place?
Nothing takes the place of Seaman’s. But you can sometimes have a vasectomy reversed.
here’s a mall that’s fun for both parts:)
That’s scary, They’re doing the exact same thing right near our house, same order too.
Fear fail. What are you scared of?
Just don’t Google “manpages”!
failblog FAIL! Comment landed in the wrong place. Should be safely nested up in P-Diddy’s Linux thread but instead was orphaned down here.
Failblog does not make mistakes. User comprehension of thread structure fail.
Full service mall win
He didn’t spell it wrong. So you fail. Suck it up
Cum again?!
nesting fail
Near where I used to live in Venice, CA there’s an In-N-Out right next to an EZ Lube. Always cracked me up.
Someone go photograph that Fail, dammit!
That’s pretty much amazing.
I lol’ed.
Definitely a win.
We have a plaza like this in Buffalo, NY.
Wait, I think this is it.
We used to have a Giant Food stores next to a Dick’s, and the road signs for the strip mall read:
Giant
Dick’s
… after several weeks they wised up and reversed the order =)
But then couldn’t that be read as “Dick is Giant”?
No, not really.
How do you reverse the order? They actually had the store pack everything up & redesign that whole section of the strip mall?
Giant Food. Totally miss the East coast for that unglorious grocery chain.
Not only on the East Coast. Used to have one on
the outskirts of San Luis Obispo (CA-USA).
Never heard of BJ’s wholesale, but this does make a nice combo.
I always thought it was funny enough just to have a Dick’s sporting goods and hoped they’d have an ad campaign, “Come to Dick’s to get your balls!”
Anyone ever seen ‘Kicking and Screaming’? The movie sucked, but at one point the main character’s (Will Ferrell) father (???), who owns a sports store, shows the latest ad for the store. “I’m (insert character name here), and (camera zoom out) (entire staff say “He’s got balls!!!”
That was an unnecessary and long comment…
There’s a BJ’s, and Dick’s in the same strip mall in Mays Landing, NJ too.. but there also used to be a Seaman’s furniture store there as well.
BJ’s, Dick’s, Seaman’s…. and then a Babies ‘R Us.
I always regretted not taking a picture of that sign.
Ever thought of the combination?!? BJ’s Dick’s I don’t really want to know how many dicks he has got.
I know several have said this is a real place in Buffalo, but the architecture sure looks like a Lowe’s, right down to the color scheme — and I’d expect a BJ’s to use as much square footage as an entire Lowes.
This isn’t actually located in Buffalo, it’s located on Transit Road in Williamsville, near the Eastern Hills Mall. The Lowes is down at the other end of the whole thing.
Not to be a party pooper, but shouldn’t the Dick’s be a part of the BJ’s? Cuz right now it just looks like dry phalluses on the right and ineffectual sucking on the left.
This is just the perfect combination of a girls and guys night out, no one is stuck sitting at home alone anymore!
success!!!!
it’s funny too,
because also in this plaza is a “Michaels”
which is an arts and craft store.
so, what you could say is, “BJ’s dick is right next to Michaels”
These two companies are in cahoots. There’s a strip mall in New Jersey with a BJ’s and Dick’s next to each other as well as this one. It’s not far from the Hamilton Township Mall, but don’t ask me on what street it’s located. I haven’t been there in about ten years.
It’s in Consumer Square on Wrangleboro Rd. A few years back it also used to be a Seamans Furniture store on the other side of dicks….
WIN!
haha, word. I love down the street from this in Buffalo. I knew that I had recognized it when I saw the picture.
Haha I worked there
I worked there
Our Dick’s Sporting Goods was built by Hoar’s Construction. The signs while they were building said:
Coming Soon:
Dick’s
by
Hoar’s.
Much laughing ensued every time we passed.
This is on transit road in amherst NY, i live there! it is a town full of FAIL
This place is on Transit Rd, East Amherst, NY (near Buffalo).
Totally a win!
Hey I know where those stores are.
Please be careful with the name games. It’s not easy, but it is possible to reconstruct. Google never forgets.
Please don’t reply.
I know this is very silly.
i’ve seen this in real life. its in buffalo, ny
At the Crossgates Mall in Albany, NY, there used to be a (Nobody Beats the) Wiz right under Dicks.
They did the same thing in Buffalo NY around my house they have dicks and bjs next to eachother
actually, the city I live in NC, there are two places where a BJ’s is next to a Dicks….
I used to live near that. There’s a Siemens next to the Dick’s that’s cut off from the picture.
So, one day my wife, teen son and I were on a shopping trip. We were in an electronics store, and the next stop was to shop for some sporting goods…. yes, at Dick’s. I guess my son and I were taking too long, and my wife wanted to move on to the next stop. Finally, in a loud exasperated voice, she says, “Can we get out of here now? I want to check out Dick’s!” I looked at my son, he looked at me…. the entire store looked at her…. and we fell on the floor laughing.
True story.
in the strip mall where I work we have dicks, bjs, best buy, mandees, micheals, joyce leslie, old navy, bath and body works, seaman (furniture store) target and babies r us..
Micheal got back from the good old navy and visited mandee’s for the best buy on bjs. He met a girl named Joyce Leslie who gave him the bath and body works, he missed his target and in 9 months this seaman was making a beeline for babies r us.
I know I know, its corny, but everyone has their own little version of this.
There is a Party City right next to Dick’s that they forgot to include in the picture. hahaha
I’ve always wanted to open a New Army Next to an Old Navy.
lets go to Dick’s and buy some Balls!