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Cheezburger Network Blog
What do you expect from the people who brought you “all your base”?
a sense of belonging
plus a consistent infantilization of a former imperialist nation (See “Pooh Bears on cell phones)
you might want to buy an end quote before someone tries to copy all the way from your comment to cryptnotic’s comment
A rich cultural history.
i think he was still talking about ‘all your base are BELONG to us’
I think I was talking about certain histories and traditions regarding hilarious translation debacles.
If they can’t speak English right, why do they even try?
Those were japanese. The language up there is obviously chinese.
It’s only obvious if you speak one of them. To those of us who speak languages that use the Roman alphabet, they’re all just weird characters.
speak for yourself, i, an american, can at least tell the difference between chinese, japanese, korean, thai, and a few others even if i can’t read a word of them
Wow you are clearly smarter and therfore better than the rest of us sir.
thanks for noticing! i’m also really humble
Wow is that how you expect to get the burn of the week, oh how you
bragging Americans make my day.
who ever said i was aiming for burn of the week? it was a joke. you know, haha, or at least a groan b/c i know it wasn’t that funny
Perfect example of why americans are ignorant… although im one myself and like malfeasant, i too can tell which is which
I use the Roman alphabet, yet I can tell
Plus, most of the characters are the same; only the pronunciation phonetic syllabaries differ. (AFAIK; don’t quote me on this.)
Actually, this is Chinese use of English. The “All your base are belong to us” was a poor English translation of a Japanese video game.
I expect “massage parlors” and an unspoken question in those little eyes when my “massage” is nearing completion.
It’s made from kenobi oil.
::This is not the butter you seek::
Star Wars quotation FAIL!
I believe that would be “This isn’t the butter you’re looking for.”
i love you RogueThree u__u
Oh, wow, I have a fangirl!
You have a fanguy, too. *points to self* *cuddles RogueThree*
This is awkward…
You think cuddling is the answer to everything! This is preposterous!
*squeeeel* *clingss*
welcome to the internet:
where men are men,
women are men,
and kids are FBI agents
I’m okay — I’m a lumberjack
Well, If you’re the lumberjack, then I’m the big blue ox.
And I’m sure you are a Babe.
Yay! You understood my little joke. No one ever understands my jokes. *cuddles*
(Cuddles won’t nest below this level)
or should it be
(Comments won’t spoon below this level)
you sleep all night and you work all day?
and he cuts down trees, wears high-heels, suspenders and a bra
I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lavotree.
on wednesdays I go shopping…
for buttered scones and tea.
Great now I have “The Lumberjack Song” running through my
head. I love Monty Python but whenever my brain gets a song stuck and can’t remember the next line it just starts over until it does a complete run through the whole song. I’ll now have to go watch it to get the song completed so my brain can move on to more useful things.
I’m a Kid
Unbelieveable!
is it butter?
Help me RogueThree, you’re my only hope.
Stay on target.
‘All your base…’ was from Zero Wing which was made by a Japanese game developer. This box of un-butter is Chinese manufactured and we can do a lot worse.
You’re thinking of Japan. This is from China.
second
More like number 2. You know…. poop.
Buuuuuuurn.
go easy on the hot sauce next time
Come on ice cream.
the pic was not that funni… i think anyway.
Well, did you find it “funny”, perhaps?
no. not that either. but thank yew for my spelling fail
I think you mean “ewe”.
fine then! im just failing all over the place today!
Baaaaah
meh. *glarez at ewe*
Zexy’s looking pretty sheepish about now.
meany.
He can’t pull the wool over your eyes!
Sadly true.
Damn! More Sheep Trick references.
No ewe.
Mashirafen, do you play a starwars game called nb2 (or something like that?) i think your name is familiar…
phailing all over your phace.
THATS MEAN! im just a bad speller…. god…. *cries in corner*
EMO FAIL
uh! im not emo!
pulls out gun and shoots you in the balls
hahahahahahahhahahahahahaha
All of our balls are belong to ewe?
Depends on which way they splattered, doesn’t it?
…ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwe.
All of your balls are now Kyle’s new kneecaps.
thats very desturbing…
They belong to the wind now…
i think a blind dyslexic could spell better than you.
I ma a libnd lesdyxic, adn I psell bertet hant mhi.
You’re a les-dick-hic?
no no, he said les-dick-sick. strange mental image.
yall are just mean. i cant spell well. is that such a bad thing!!!
Yes.
actually it’s emo WIN
Oxymoron win.
True. So what would a Tickle Me Emo doll do? Just mutter about tickling being a form of death he’s well acquainted with?
Truth in advertisement win. Have you ever tasted that stuff?!
*checks pulse* Still alive, so my answer would have to be “Nope!”
Yes. I find it quite easy to believe it is not butter.
I’ll be convinced when I can taste the “not” butter. Until then, I must remain without judgement. At least for another couple of comments.
i think sand is the inverse of butter.
I think you might be on to something…
My cats breath smells like kitty food.
Well if that’s the case, then my dog’s breath would have to smell like chicken poop.
ralph wiggum quote win, even though it’s “cat food”.
hello supernintendo chalmers
HAHAHAHA
Somewhere in Europe, Fabio cries himself to sleep at night.
and why are you telling trhis to us??
because it is funny…laugh a little. (Fabio used to do the ” I can’t believe it’s not butter” commercials)
Until his face got smashed by a wayward goose who didn’t respect the flight paths of roller coasters.
Is that how he earned his “Slashie”?
Ahh, Zoolander references are priceless.
Do the “first” people just sit all day and hit F5?
No, they hit Alt + F4.
Wow, stay up all night thinking about that one? Went to bed around 2, 2:30?
Obvious troll is obvious
*gets out the spray*
Someone called ?
Genuine LOL #2…
this is my view: the only thing more tedious then those people shouting first all the time, is the string a replies that follow. it’s always the same and it takes up a lot of room.
Amen.
Ben, just throwing it out there but given the gap between your post, Sara J’s reply and your sharp-tongued retort I’m thinking we may have a ‘Refresh Monkey’ in our midst.
I’d also have to say that given Sara’s reply being 3 minutes after your original post she didn’t waste too long thinking about how to burn you.
Carry on.
my thoughts exactly.
yes we do.
Somebody’s jealooooous.
Me! Me…! Is it me???
It’s me, isn’t it?
Jealous, and paranoid
Finished with my woman, ’cause she doesn’t help me with my mind…
why not “cause COULDN’T help me with my mind”?
Black Sabbath fail
Face it, you had to look at a lyric sheet for that, didn’t you?
I wonder how many dyslectic people will fail to notice the fail.
dyslexic do you mean?
Dyslexics Untie!
Lysdexia!
He menas dysclectic as he worte it, stop bieng a samrtass.
i can be a ’samrtass’ if i want to be.
yeah, just not a smartass. no one likes those.
yeah… ur ringt. thank you for ur support.
“Yeah, you’re right. Thank you for your support.”
Spelling fail. Once again, the laugh out loud cat people have strayed from home. *Brandishes broom*.
Oh dood!! Bring it!!! *unsheaths claws*
you can stay. you warned us beforehand.
Bartles and James SUCCESS
WIN FAIL.
It’s called WIN not SUCCESS.
No, I’m using SUCCESS now. You can take your shitty peer pressure and talk twenty one-year-olds into trying cocaine, but leave me and my innocent comments alone.
p.s. I hate you.
Is it because I’m black?
What you talkin’ ’bout, Willis?
Are you glaDos in disguise?
killerwit needs a Companion Cube or he’ll have to remain here, alone and companionless.
It’s calling your girlfriend then calling you cuckolded.
ZING!!
*gets out the horns*
I must say, that old turn of phrase has always made me wonder about the term “horny”. It just somehow doesn’t seem right.
Cuckholding is a very old word. It was first published in “Penis” Magazine in an article featuring orangutans being grilled on nazi barbeques. After application of ho sauce, the eager male seeks unbelievable mating rituals with upstairs basements. After the eggs hatch, the male realizes that while away from his home state of Georgia, the Russian army invaded and inseminated his upstairs basement. His baby, a FAIL, now studies geography.
This is cuckholding.
I think a more precise definition of cuckholding is this: talonsofpeace
Ok so I digress, it’s when a male impregnates a female, but the female is already “mated” with yet ANOTHER male. Duped, “cuckholded” male then raises the young because he thinks their “his”.
Note: This is also why humans almost ALWAYS suggest a newborn babies eyes LOOK LIKE THE FATHERS. It’s too assure (subconciously) that the father was/is the real parent. (And doctors have noted that this happens even if the baby does not have the same color eyes.)
*they’re
Grammar Fail.
To*
Spelling Fail.
*Tip toes away to avoid making anymore FAILS*
tiptoes*
Shouldn’t it be “tip-toes”?
Ok, that was a Waldo, you found it. You receive many wisdom blessings from the Enlightened Flaming Orangutans.
Shouldn’t it be “blessings of wisdom”?
I’m using a Tibetan Buddhist expression here. The word “Samaya” itself means “wisdom blessing”. It is a correct translation, albeit a little strange for western palates.
My World Studies teacher told my step sister’s class that the Japanese threw flaming monkeys at the British.
Oh my, Tiamat, Talon and Dragon in one nested post.
*hides*
Yeah, that one kinda scares me too…
I’m frightened, hold me fuzz!
Fuzz will be your “Boy with Pail.”
(google us)
i know i have majer spellfailage issues. i spell things rong all the time! god…
Maybe you shouldn’t post comments then.
Oh wow, then did *you* just stumble into the wrong blog!
Do dyslexics understand palindromes? And does Michael Palin have a brother named Nilap? Hmmmm.
Unbelievable.
Judging by the Chinese lettering this is definitely not butter – it’s most likely dog.
yeah… i have to admit your right. i have tried that stuff before and it tasted like it might be…
you’re thinking of Korea.
They all look the same to me.
The letters, not the people.
You ‘coons all look the same, too.
no i mean the eating-dog stereotype is from Korea not China. or it could be both i guess. hmm.
I once got that “that wasn’t chicken” fortune cookie at a Chinese restaurant, so allow me to be skeptical about them not serving dog.
My friend helped shut down a sketchy chinese restaurant in my city. The health department discovered LIVE RAT TRAPS in the basement. One must wonder why a restaurant was KEEPING RATS ALIVE. The evidence is really damning, and it all points to the unfortunate little fact that FOR YEARS, this restaurant sold unsuspecting patrons RAT MEAT.
Why exactly DO YOU keep CAPITALIZING random WORDS?
Because IT is ENTERTAINING
Because he WRITES for a SHOCK NEWSPAPER
If you think those words are random, then you will continually go through life eating trapped rat meat at crappy Chinese restaurants because you didn’t heed the warning.
Rat meat isn’t all that bad, actually. It’s kind of stringy, but it’s alright in a pinch. I actually find overzealous use of capitalization in worse taste than mislabeling a particular brand of charred animal flesh.
FAIL.
still capitalising are we?
Well, we ARE capitalists….
P.S. There is no such thing as a ’stereotype’ regarding asians eating dogs, we’re talking about a fact here.
no, it’s a fact that some of them eat dog. it’s a stereotype that they all do.
i think of it more of a vietnamese thing…
I can’t believe this.
cant believe what? you cant just let us hang?!?!?
This is not my ZexyLuver!
okay……
This is not my ZexyWife!
where is that large automobile?
Oh God, what have we done??!!
There are pills for that.
Main Entry: cant
Part of Speech: verb
Definition: to speak whiningly or affectedly
Holy shit! It’s not?!
no, its dog like Racoon1 said.
If it’s not butter, what the hell is it?!?!?!
i just said it is dog like Racoon1 said!!! (it does taste like it to)
It’s a cuter dairy product posing as butter.
tub butter like that is one molocule away from plastic so it is PLASTIC BUTTER!!!
ZexyLuver: Now With Less Wit!
yall are so goddamn mean
your comments, meanwhile, remain below the mean
What do you mean? I say they’re below the median.
I maintain that they are outliers and should be excluded.
you clearly possess a cruel statistic streak, mmmhmm
but i’m liking your mode of operations
yes, definitely statistical anomalies.
Did you not even bother to lurk before posting? Does this honestly come as a surprise to you??
*molecule
I’ve only studied basic undergraduate chemistry, but I have a hard time believing this unbelievable butter is closer to butter than we humans are to chimps and gorillas.
Would you imply that this butter is from gorilla milk ?
And who’s the poor schmuck who has to milk the gorilla??
guess who just volunteered!
(no, not me : P )
The important thing is that if it’s not butter it’s not good for masturbation.
I prefer masturbation with porcupines in a rosebush.
. . .with orangutans peeping through the thicket.
I braid my pubes.
i’d like to grow a really long beard, braid it into my pubes, and strum it like a harp.
Sounds like pubic indecency to me.
No, that sounds like a fricking party and a half. I’ll bring the Fritos.
No, talonsofpeace, you’re not welcome to the cuddle party!
Foiled again! *Jumps out window*
*Tosses Lolcattus out after him*
wait… aren’t you a girl? bearded lady?
yeah… hence why i said ‘i’d like to’ and didn’t insinuate any ability.
maybe someone can give me some testosterone for my birthday.
And call it Willy Nelson?
It’s not good for mastication either.
But maybe ok for expectoration er expactoration uhh, spitting it out . . .
Spitting? True love FAIL
I lold
Really? I’d have thought you’d show off and garggle!
Who gargles with butter? Honestly . . .
The same people who throw shoes.
failblog FAIL. Ever heard of engrish.com? Copycats.
*tsk, tsk* Have you never heard of the failblog fairies? They come and do unfortunate things in your house if you criticize failblog. Really, you should be more careful.
*stands a little further away from 2.0 so as to not incur the wrath of the failblog fairies*
Censor me please!
<===3
Is that a new avatar you are proposing?
Dude, your avatar looks like a birds view of the top of a castle.
No, it’s just the new censorship logo.
hmmm… interesting. i think i may be the only one who gets ur icon, raccoon1!
nobody cares!!!!1
Unbelieveable.
This is not English.
Wow…lost in translation.
Translate Server Error
404 Error: Win not found
Zing!
oo0o nice
HAHAHA all your base are belong to wasabi!
Eh, Fabio got his comeuppance for advertising this spreadable horror. Too bad he shattered his kamikaze bird assassin with his humongous cheekbones.
For some reason this sounds less like false advertising then the U.S. way to say it, they’re practically warning you. ” Egads! This is NOT butter, warn the consumers!”
If you don’t want to believe the butter, don’t. Basically, this is Libertarian butter. Believe it if you want, or don’t, but it doesn’t matter because it’s your choice to buy the “butter” and eat the “butter”. Either way, the butter wants you to make up your own mind and do as YOU please.
Is that not Unitarian Universalist butter?
On second thought, it very well could be.
We need more FAIL today!
“Now with jingle by EMF!”
“And shamelessly promoted by Andrew “Dice” Clay.
FIRST
…to die. (if i can get away with my master planz) >3
ZexyLuver, your humor is as dry as an old woman’s vagine on Prozac.
are you speaking from experience?
Yes, he met your mother the other day.
i’m not going to doubt that, she is quite the tramp.
Where’s Dragonwriter when you need her? I wanna cuddle. Meh, oh well. *cuddles*
are you… cuddling yourself >o> !?
No, whenever I say “*cuddles*” that means that I’m cuddling the person before me, unless I specify someone in it like this: *cuddles happiest girl*
i see i see.
*cuddles*
oh i could get used to this ^_^
Yay! Cuddles! I love cuddles! *cuddles*
*sneaks in the middle unnoticed*
loz sandwich yum!
Yay! More cuddle-buddies! *cuddles*
(Unnoticed Fail)
Ew, get this Corky guy outta here. Sorry. *Jumps out window*
I told you you’re not welcome to the cuddle party! *drops an unwelcome lolcat on his head as he’s falling*
I’m here! Am I too late for the cuddles??
You can NEVER be late for cuddles! *cuddles*
*Bogarts cuddle, then splits through the wall like a ninja, throwing lolcat toupee back at Tiamat as a diversion*
*Throws the Pink Shuriken Avatar at talons*
*The Pink Shuriken Avatar dashes out Talonsofpeace’s brai. .dadjf
asf
t
qqr#$ 3 >
*yells: “Sabre, dinner time!”*
(Sabre’s my dog.)
Hope you put up good “fencing” for your dog “sabre”.
I thought your brain was “dashed out”. And my dog “Sabre” has a 36′x36′ “fencing” area.
*snatches back bogarted cuddle*
…And the FIRST person who makes a comment about
cuddling snatches gets FOOOOOMed!!
….Uh oh…..
(FOOOOOMs self)
Sheeesh! I thought this sort of thing only occurred on National Geographic!
You know you only watch that for the third-world boobs flopping around.
If by “he” you mean me, then you should replace that “he” with “she.” A “she” who happens to look like dragon writer’s twin sister BTW.
Cuddle party! *cuddles*
Oh, look. Now I’m between two tall, redheaded, curvy sisters! *cuddles*
(Strangest part of this whole ordeal is that red hair is my favorite color of hair.)
Well…mine’s a very dark red with plenty of brown in it. More auburn, really. I’m not a ginger.
*high-fives tall, red-headed, curvy sistah!*
how old would she have to be?
Why? You interested?
Pyramid 12
Cone 42
Many large rats being kept alive in LIVE RAT cages. Mmm, moo-shu “Pork”. Enjoy! BWHAHAHAHAHAH HAHAHAHAH!
That, and Rhombus 39
Prism 69
Sphere 101
Do I win?
No.
Dodecahedron 263.
Taco 6 and Burrito 9
Finally, you can have your geometry lesson and eat it, too!
I didn’t know lessons were edible. *Eats a ‘fisting’ tutorial*
Rubber Fist Rossini in a Creme de Couilles for monsieur.
Circle 0
translation fail.
In Soviet Russia, the tutorials eat you
.
Reply Fail.
I know, I broke the pyramid. I feel horrible.
For a moment I thought Shadow was responding to him/herself because I only saw the icons…
Oh no, I’m not crazy, I don’t talk to myself…
What are you talking about, yes you are!
Shut up.
By the way, Dragonwriter, I’m a guy. Just for future reference.
Righto!
*makes a note*
Aww shit, we gotta keep notes now?
Plz to be remembering i am a girl type, and 6ft tall also but not a red head k thx bai
*don’t need no notez for dis one,
dis pickshur iz goin right next to my heartses
… or least my back pantses pockit*
Ummmmm….
*hands pants back to fuzz*
Don’t ask…it’s a long story.
O.O
He left ‘em in…oh, fergit it, the story’s in the bike fail thread.
Not a redhead? Please tell me your not blonde. I have a strange disaffection toward blonde hair.
For some reason it’s only for females, too. My boyfriend is actually blonde. O.O
.. and is he good for relieving your ……. tension?
He can be, yes. There are times when he can add to it though.
and does he like… sports?
and i haz brown hair, and a mad that u tried to throw me out the window with talons up dere
That was a totally different lolcat, sweets! After all, you
can’t have Lolcattus without “us”!!
Wait…
You can’t have “us” without Lolcatt….no. No, that doesn’t work.
Ah, hell. Yer one of “us” and your name proves it.
I just picked a random name that was on my screen. It also had lolcat in it, which I used an lolcat the first time. So I thought it should be similar.
and i haz a confidence you can anywayz handles yourself upon your nimble paws of unsheathed piercingness
::masturbates::
::cat dies::
Sorry, had to do it.
Wierd… I just noticed… is it just me or does that knife with the butter on the end of it kind of look like a penis?
It’s just you.
Ask Freud.
I think the thumb looks more like a penis.
i can’t believe it’s not not butter…
i wonder how this stuff compares to a dead crab…
things that make you go, “hmmm.”
Lean over and I’ll make you go, “hmmm.”
I think he is still bunking with Talons
no so much anymorz
now i mostly thinks bout pickshurs mostly in my pocketses
That can’t be! He just kissed me the other day!
be careful, fuzz is a sweet talker, among other things
i learn evverything bout talkin purrdy from teh purdy lolcattus when she purr
*Purrs “I’m married”
ahh, yes …
*here looking at you, sweetheart*
… but we’ll always have Purreez.
Catsablanca reference is full of win!
Fuzz, I think you’ve been smoking something…
careful, my umbraous fellow, where there’s smoke there’s apt to be burns
for now, though, let’s listen to Rumi speak of Shadow:
_____
Only full overhead sun diminishes your shadow.
But that shadow has been serving you.
What hurts you, blesses you. Darkness is
your candle. Your boundaries are your quest.
I could explain this, but it will break the
glass cover on your heart, and there’s no
fixing that.
You must have shadow and light source both.
Listen, and lay your head under the tree of awe.
When from that tree feathers and wings sprout on you,
be quieter than a dove. Don’t even open your mouth for
even a coo.
_____
and …
____
You are a shadow in love with the Sun
… the Sun comes up …
*retires the hookah*
*Takes back comment from earlier*
Damn, that’s deep.
By the way, just to play Grammar Police for a moment…
“…where there’s smoke there’s apt to be burns
for now, though…”
I detect no period at the end of that sentence…
____
The Caravan of the Unseen enters the visible world, …
the other world keeps coming into this world.
Like cream hidden in the soul of milk,
no-place keeps coming into place….
And from beyond intellect, beautiful love
comes dragging her skirts, a cup of wine in her hand.
And from beyond Love, that indescribable One
who can only be called “That” keeps coming.
____
~ Rumi, Divan-i Shamsi Tabriz
Tabriz, incidentally, where Rumi’s love and ecstatic inspiration, Shams, came from, is the modern day Tblisi, in Georgia.
When, oh when, will we ever learn?
*applauds*
cries
::masturbates::
::another cat dies::
Yup…he’s a very deep (h)ombra.
…Okay. That was funnier in my head. :p
And jewel-minded Dragon is herself no shallow (h)umbrella.
… “You can stand under my umbrella (ella ella eh eh eh)”…
Great song…
WOO! My post moved! I’d posted this in response to Shadow’s “deep” comment.
Folks, I think we have a poltergeist on the blog.
Oh, and…
*smooches fuzz*
Someone say my name?
*checks notes*
I see you are a male poltergeist…
He has my icon!
All your icon are belong to Poltergeist.
Ya caught me, skippy.
INCONCEIVABLE.
Hey, I didn’t know Vizzini posted on Failblog.
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Don’t you mean “Inconceiveable”?
At least I dont shop there.
Burn attempt FAIL.
It’s a Princess Bride reference, yeesh, how could you not know that?
Oh, duh, I see, referring to the picture…
I so knew that.
Self 1st degree burn. Here here, mommy will fix that.
It stings, mommy…
hahahah oh my.
thank you Shadow.
You’re very welcome.
*wonders vaguely what in the hell he did to elicit a thanks*
I’m in love with you too.
*eats a live ferret*
Ok. now, that’s just creepy, stop.
Lololol, this is just fail for those who says it’s fail. The darn thing is really called that for a reason. In Jersey (and probably other places to) they have one called “I can’t believe it’s not butter!”. That is simply not butter, but another dairy product that’s suppousably better for your health than butter. But hey… what the heck, eh?
moran.
Unbelievable, you can breath!
after the new label we put on our butter, only 3 out of 5 old ladies can’t tell the difference between it and a dead crab! now with even more less!
what, more than a day and no responses?
i made that same reference earlier, nobody seemed to get it then either…
this is NOT butter
as a Chinese guy I can read Chinese.
and it says eh margarine up there.
so lol to ruin the atmosphere this isn’t such a phail i guess.
OMG lol what biters xD
Then its margarine, so its not a fail. The fail failed
Didn’t ozzy osbourne do a commercial for this?? I think it’s on Youtube