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» 609 Failures in Communication

  1. emerald hammer says:

    Maybe pressing 3 nine times would do it?

    • wonder mutt says:

      I tip my hat to you, sir.

    • youraznfail says:

      lets just hit #1, 27x

    • Guy Over Yonder says:

      That’s what I was thinking. :P

    • MikeW of VA says:

      [From Albequerque, the song]
      If you’d like to make a call, hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your oooooooooperator!

    • yup says:

      you guys are all morons.

      999 is the UK’s equivalent to the American 911.

      get some culture.

      • Kristin says:

        The “999″ is not the supposed fail, it’s the lack of the number 9 on the keypad.

      • Wee says:

        Yeah, well, the fact that it says EMERGENCY PHONE probably already told them…

        How does that change the anything?

        • Michael says:

          Erm.. Sorry to jump in here, but you could actually just call 112 (international emergancy services) :) Problem solved!

      • dolt says:

        yes but do you know the emergeny number that can be used all over Europeand in Britain is usually less busy than 999and which you could type on that phone?

        it’s 112, a little general knowledge goes a long way hence i have just shared it with you

      • just4internetfame says:

        Noticing the true fail, fail!

      • Evo7 says:

        Yup, you’re a moron. As everyone else has already pointed out, the phone
        has no nine. And I’m really getting sick of everyone blasting all Americans for
        not knowing or caring about anything outside of our own border. Not everyone
        in our nation is that culturally inept. My bet is that the percentage of morons in
        the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth, and that
        most of us are just as ashamed to be included with them in the all-encompassing
        ‘Dumb American’ moniker as you would be to be lumped in with all the idiots
        in your country. Except that you already proved you’re an idiot by telling us
        all that 999 is the emergency number in the UK instead of realizing that dialing
        three 9s would be difficult on a phone with no 9 button.

        • ilovesat says:

          “My bet is that the percentage of morons in
          the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…” – Evo7

          i know. The only reason america looks stupid is that even stupid people have the right to talk. In communist countries, only the display-people get on tv, or global newspapers. The anti-government people OBViously don’t. it’s cool that on the internet EVERYONE can all spew their top-level “intelligence” and then hash it out with other ppl from all over the world who think they’re dumb!!! internet win

          • Dave says:

            Americans look stupid when they appear to split the world into Americans and Commies…

            Freedom of speech isn’t just an American thing, you know.

        • ilovesat says:

          “My bet is that the percentage of morons in
          the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…”

          I know! US only looks stupid because everyone here has the right to talk, and most (even the idiots) use that right.
          In communist countries, only the display-people are on tv stations and global newspapers. anti-gvrnment people OBViously aren’t. I think it’s cool that EVERYONE on the internet can be as “intelligent” as possible, but then look like complete MOROns in front of the rest of the world…As for the picture, it’s FUNNY!

        • Sara says:

          YOU fail, evo, because the numbers are probably on the handset or behind it. NO NO ONE is so stupid that they would design a phone with only 1 2 3 on it.

      • david says:

        how ’bout kazakhstan?

    • kate says:

      uh… Sorry to burst multiple bubbles, but this is an actual photo of a UK public phone. The emergency number there, instead of 911, is 999.

      • Alice says:

        That still doesn’t change the fact that there’s no sodding ‘9′ button.

      • david says:

        this has to be a joke.

      • Not A Rapist says:

        Jesus fucking Christ! How many times do we need to tell everyone that that’s not the issue with this phone. It has no nine! Anyone else that says this shit, I’m going to stab you on that beach so you go to that phone and find out what the fuck is wrong with it!

    • Sara says:

      The numbers are probably on the phone itself, or behind it, where you can’t see it. Not sure what the ‘1′ ‘2′ ‘3′ are for.

    • rocky says:

      thats what i thought!!!

    • research before you type says:

      So let me put this to rest, the phone automatically connects to the 999 emergency hot line and then you are given three options: fire, medical emergency, or crime in progress. After that you are patched into the correct dispatch office and a responding unit is sent. Thank you for your time. And yes it could still be considered a fail because you never dial 999. a possible redundancy fail? what are your thoughts?

    • DSJD says:

      999 is the equivalent of 911 in Britain and many European countries. Maybe it is foreign made or *gasp* in a country where 999 is correct?

    • english says:

      um 999 = british version of 911 the fail is a fail

    • Pata says:

      999 is the Great Britain emergency number. Not every country in the world uses 911…

    • jahosafat says:

      or 27 times. since 3 times 3 is nine, and nine times 3 is 27.

  2. wonder mutt says:

    Would it be the 3 button 9 times?

  3. Pumpkiny says:

    You just have to punch 3, three times.
    Math fail.

  4. Yo Momma says:

    or they could phone 112…

  5. tatterdemalion says:

    FOURTH

  6. Retarded says:

    This is a Fail Fail. 999 is what you dial for emergency services across the pond, and maybe other places as well.

  7. kisa says:

    it’s in the uk, 999 is emergency number.

  8. Homer says:

    This was better when there were not 750 comments on every single fail. It’s getting lamer than lol cats

  9. Bob says:

    In Soviet Russia coast guard calls you

  10. Adriano says:

    Just push the 3 buton nine times :)

  11. joojifz says:

    PHOTOSHOP!!!

  12. Gnomie says:

    In the UK, 999 is the emergency number. I don’t see anything remotely “fail” about this picture; it was probably taken in Britain.

  13. winwintoo says:

    The picture is of British Telecom phone. In Great Britain, you dial “999″ for emergencies. 911 is a North American thing.

    • Jane says:

      Apparently having the buttons needed to dial for an emergency actually on the phone is also a North American thing, you half-wit.

      • fuzz on the concept says:

        I believe you meant “half-twit”, my dear.
        And he’s perhaps a fitting candidate of the Upper Class Twit of the Year competition, if he shoots a shotgun off as well as he shoots his mouth off.

        • Jackie Pancake says:

          Assuming he doesn’t run himself over first.

        • moo says:

          No its called a half-wit idiot

          Half-wit
          Main Entry: half-wit
          Part of Speech: noun
          Synonyms: blockhead, dolt, dummy, dunce, fool, idiot, moron, nitwit, numskull, simpleton

        • bob says:

          Half-wit is a NA saying. as in you aren’t intelligent, you only have half of a wit.
          But seriously, what is with the multiple observation fails. one after another.
          “it’s a British phone, 999 is the emergency number, it isnt a fail…”
          (NA=North America)

      • Radar says:

        That is GREAT!!!!

    • Emi says:

      Uh, also. Try dialling 911 on that phone. Go on, I dare ya. It’s about as easy as dialling 999, with no 9 button. As has already been pointed out several times.

      Noticing the obvious FAIL

    • Klaus says:

      my god, am I stuck in Groundhog Day?

    • Jacerm says:

      How is it that you noticed the British Telecom logo but missed the lack of a nine button and almost every comment up until this point?

    • e.blair says:

      Actually, the U.S. copied the 999 idea from the UK, where it had been in use for many years, but for some reason used 911 instead.

  14. Adam Bell says:

    Look at the state of thing thing… can you really expect the sign above it to be rgiht?

  15. Sorsha says:

    2+2+3+2
    3+3+3

    Addition Win

  16. God says:

    Phones don’t do maths. You all failed.

  17. Kahhhhhhaaaan says:

    I dont get it!!! Thats the UK emergancy number!! the numbers on a phone go 0 up to 9!! Americans – Fail!!

  18. Soulcrun says:

    I think the rating is messed up.
    It says I’m the first to rate while there’s already 45+ comments… :S
    If it isn’t messed up, I AM the first to vote. xD

  19. Dilbert says:

    *Maybe*, just maybe, it’s because the numbers are actually on the headset (or whatever it’s called, my brain fails me).
    Therefore, you’d just have to pick up the phone, and dial the numbers that we currently can’t see, but may include a 9 ;O

  20. oh_My_Dog says:

    If the phone can only be used in an emergency, why even have buttons, why not have the phone automatically connect with Emergency Services. The buttons may have been labeled at one time to faciilitate the classification of the nature of emergency such as 1 would be Coast Guard, 2 would connect to Police, and 3 would ring the Fire Brigade. Although I’d much rather use a blue Police Call box when in real trouble.

  21. oh_thesoundof says:

    Er … 999 = 911 in the UK.

  22. Suzy says:

    You know, in England dialing 999 does connect you to those services. I can only assume this was a North American phone, which is why its a fail, otherwise this fail is a fail :P

    • Winfail says:

      No because even if it was in North America, tell me how YOU would dial 911?

    • chez says:

      for the umpteen fricking millionth time this phone has no 9 button. this is not about international differences in emergency numbers. it is about the fucktard at the factory making a phone that has only 3 digits. last time i say this. i hate repeating the obvious for morons.

    • Radar says:

      No, no, no NO! We kicked all the FAIL out of North America about 200 years ago!

  23. Pumpkiny says:

    Maybe it’s not even a phone fail at all.
    Maybe it’s an Emergency phone line win, and a caller fail! :)

  24. Suzy says:

    lol oh nvm my comment I must be fucking wiped out not to notice it only has three numbers…Im an idiot…:P

    • goodnplenty says:

      Oh, come on then, Suzy! There’s no joy in it for us when you admit your errors. You should defend yourself to the death like Pumpkiny until comments won’t nest below said level.

      Stupid humility :(

    • Not Me says:

      It’s a shame, too, that there weren’t thirteen thousand other comments pointing out the exact same thing, so you could have read them and avoided making yourself look like such a crotchwaffle.

      • Sunny says:

        1. crotchwaffle

        That particular area located on a woman’s anatomy where the legs come together, i.e.- the naughty bits
        Dorothy took great delight in shaving her crotchwaffle and then shooting ping-pong balls out of it.

        2. CrotchWaffle

        Bre, the herpefied mathlete
        “Ew. Bre YOU CROTCHWAFFLE”

        I looked it up and I still don’t get it.

      • aphrodite says:

        Thank you for revisiting that term. I KNEW there was something missing in my life!!!!

  25. Peppy says:

    Isn’t there also an alternative number?
    112 I think it is.
    Although the sign does say ring 999…
    Maybe it’s an idiot trap.

    Or maybe I’m just an idiot.

    (In Soviet Russia, idiot traps you!… had to be done.)

  26. Sunny says:

    What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important.

    • Pumpkiny says:

      It’s funny how people keep commenting on the Americans’ stupidity with this fail when it’s already been pointed out numerous times that “999″ is an emergency number in the UK.

  27. underbond says:

    Distraction fail. The arrow actually makes it take longer to get it.

    • Fan says:

      Well, the arrow points you to what you first need to pay attention to. Then the typed words “Phone Fail” alert your attention to the fail. It’s a pretty basic Failblog formula. People are just dumber and blinder than usual today.

  28. DrDr says:

    In Soviet Russia, FAIL phones YOU!

  29. FC says:

    photoshop fail.

  30. Melissa says:

    999 is the emergency number in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and more. Thus, this Fail is not a Fail unless this phone is in the United States, which I highly doubt it is. Instead, ignorant American assumptions that everything is done around the world as it is done here is a Fail.

    • Maori Bum says:

      Ok, which button do you push for 9? 1, 2, or 3?

    • loz says:

      yet another person who doesn’t get the fail. ironically, you’re being a prime example of an ignorant American.

      the fail is that the phone does not have a ‘9′ button.

    • fuzz on the concept says:

      What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .

      • Drew says:

        They must have started the LHC. Our space-time seems to be stuck in a mobius strip.

        • fuzz on the concept says:

          My belt is a mobius strip, and I don’t read what I post, or anything that looks too Sunny. But what gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .

      • MyMalady says:

        That assumption is clear as .. the buttons on my phone??

    • goodnplenty says:

      Is it the Americans that are stupid for not knowing that 999 is an emergency number in other parts of the world? OR is it the other parts of the world that are stupid for not noticing that there’s NO FREAKING 9 ON THE PHONE AND NOT READING THE REST OF THE FREAKING THREAD BEFORE POSTING??????????

      You go sit in the corner with the this-is-old-and-fake-tards.

    • Klaus says:

      Ignorant twat can’t see that there is not a number 9 fail.

    • twilight faery says:

      Am I gonna have to choke a bitch?

  31. Kit says:

    This will certainly cut down on the number of people you can crank call from this phone. HA! Lets see you little punks call me now!

    • Bob says:

      But do you have Prince Albert in a can?

      • Malfeasant says:

        ha- once working at an evil electronics retailer which shall remain nameless, some kids called me and tried that bit- they sounded like they were 12- i asked them if they even knew what prince albert was… that shut them up for about 2 seconds… then they asked if my refrigerator was running

    • Capt Obvious says:

      You should get your name changed from Hugh Jass. That’d help, too.

  32. Melissa says:

    My apologies for not noticing there are no 9s on the phone – I thought the fail was simply regarding the number 999 as opposed to 911.

    • fuzz on the concept says:

      S’alright.
      Where would you like to be kissed to make it feel better? I’m thinking in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and then some more.

    • Klaus says:

      And yet you still look like an idiot.

  33. ausrick says:

    Uhm, just start mashing buttons WIN?

  34. Trent says:

    Umm… 999 is the emergency number in UK.
    Your fail Fails!!!

  35. Dean P says:

    Why is this a fail? In the UK you dial 999 for emergencies. Country identification fail.

  36. zearth says:

    If you push 2 and 3 at the same time, it does 2*3=6. And 6 is topsy-turvy 9, therefore try to push it while standing on your head.

  37. joojifz says:

    People the numbers on the phone are in the speaker as soon as you pick it up you can see them… I went there and checked it myself!!!

  38. British Telecom says:

    Wow. No one pointed out the BT logo on the phone… British Telecom. Clearly this phone is in Cuba. As can also be inferred by the sign being in Spanish. Duh.

  39. Jack says:

    Maxwell Murder Win?

  40. becca says:

    photoshop fail!

  41. vespinito says:

    Just because you can’t see the numbers 4 through 9 (and zero) doesn’t mean their not there.

    I believe emergency phones tend to have their numbers on the receiver.

  42. Thallia says:

    My college spent the better part of a semester installing autodial security phones all over campus. The poles, wiring, lighting, weatherproof housings, and signs were installed weeks before the phones were installed. Some pranksters went around and drew pictures of phone keypads inside the housings, and in one spot someone left a cup with a string that led inside of the wiring hole. Tee hee.

  43. GodPikachu says:

    Actually, this isnt a phone fail, its a photoshop fail.

  44. TimmyBravo says:

    Maybe it’s additive, you need to press the 3 button 333 times, the 2 button 499 times and the 1 button once, the one button 999 times, or some combination of those.

    In any of those cases, by the time you’d finished, the emergency would be over and the need to call would be obviated.

    Lazy call centre win?

  45. Radar says:

    I think we discovered Steven Wright’s phone. He had a phone that had no “7″ so he could not call his friend.

  46. Ivana says:

    Seeing as BT stands for British Telecom, the phone is somewhere in the UK, and thus is not a fail.

  47. Meyx says:

    There is only one arrow, which points at the number 999, and that makes some people think it is the main fail and not spot the lacking of the ‘9′ button.

  48. ArminVanBuuren says:

    3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3

    Congrats, you’re calling 999

    end of FAIL

  49. Sand says:

    Well, it is inherently obvious to even the most casual observer that they meant dial “999″ in base 4 where you’d actually dial “33213″… *tips hat*

    • Dalkorian says:

      Nice, except base 4 is completely useless for anything else.
      Resuscitating useless base number system FAIL.
      :D

  50. Dalkorian says:

    3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3 = 27
    You’ll have to push that 3 button a few more times to get to 999.
    Mathematics FAIL.
    ;-)

  51. Wartooth118 says:

    It’s the Cinco Fail-a-phone!

  52. kirb says:

    Am I the first to say that ‘999′ is the emergency number for England?

  53. betterthanyou says:

    You retards. 999 is the UK’s 911.

  54. asDF says:

    was this phone found outside of North America?

    if so… ignorant people thinking 911 is the universal emergency number FAIL x infinity

    dumbasses who live inside their own little box and think they know everything and deem everything that doesn’t make sense in their box as fail…. you are the true failures.

    • Sunny says:

      AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! WE ARE the TRUE FAILURES! We the ones who can see the lack of the nine button on the phone are the dumb asses. I wish someone was around who could help me out of this box! There is no nine in my little box! Help me before I fail again!

      • fuzz on the concept says:

        I wonder in what kind of box asDF lives.
        He appears to be standing penniless inside the free clues warehouse.

        • aylagriffin says:

          The kind of box where you come to failblog for a clue, obviously. :)

          • fuzz on the concept says:

            If that’s the case, asDF would appear to need a new box x infinity and beyond. Got’s the mind of a spaced cartoon.

            • Infested-Fail says:

              Why does it have to be a box? And the lack of the “9″ is an obvious atempt t reducing the population of England. Maybe like a cleansing?

    • Klaus says:

      the irony is thick.

    • Marquizzo says:

      I love the self-righteousness found on the internet. Everybody feels so smug about being correct about something.

      Way to go, asDF… look at the buttons. There’s no 9. Take a chill-pill.

  55. IBKC says:

    It looks a little like a cutout. (Don’t say “PHHHHHHHOOOOTTTTTTTOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHOOOOOOOPPPEEEEDDDD” unless you explain why!) ;)

    • Sunny says:

      In my phone experiences 1, 2 & 3 go across the top of the number pad. Can anyone tell the ignorant American if this is true other places also? Outside of my little box if you will?

  56. steth says:

    notice the phone is made by “BT”

    BT = British Telecom

    American 911 = British 999

  57. Krista says:

    999-is like 911 in Great Britain. That would explain the BT at the lower left hand corner!!

  58. Cazador says:

    fake

    soooo fake

    • TMI Service. says:

      I don’t know the engineering details, but I do see in Google images an additional example of a BT phone with just the three buttons alongside a sign instructing users to dial “999.” Conjecture: those signs were affixed independently of the phones.

  59. grishkin says:

    or you could just dial 321 reverse :D

  60. K says:

    Stupid Americans. Obviously 999 is the emergency number for the UK.

  61. Lee says:

    In the uk, and many other parts of the world where English is spoken and understood by large numbers of the population, 999 is an official emergency number.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_call

  62. Pred108 says:

    in the UK (you know, your ancestors…) you don’t dial 911 but 999 to get connected to the cops, firefighters, etc… so no fake, and NO FAIL… only FAIL are people saying it’s PHOT’ED.

    • Adoni says:

      did you read ANY of the previous posts???

      PS- not everyone has ancestors from the UK, damn window licker….

    • Sunny says:

      Please oh wise ancestral one show me how to dial 999 on a phone that only has buttons 1, 2 & 3.

    • rocky says:

      my ancestors aren’t from the UK. did u know there are people that actually live in other parts of the world other than the UK! must be shocking 4 u.

    • piperchicki says:

      No… my ancestors would dial 110. (Well, they would if phones and direct dial had been around back when they were my ancestors.)

    • Jessi says:

      Umm, yeah… my ‘ancestors’ are Korean and German. And everyone always gripes about the U.S. not being knowledgeable when it comes to other countries (or groups of countries, as it were).

  63. Bexta says:

    “Help fight crime, dial 999… is it 999 because it rhymes with crime?”

  64. Bob says:

    OK, if you’ve managed to read the million “Duh fail British 911 is 999 lol” posts and got this far, you deserve an explanation. The sign is clearly very old, and was obviously put there when there was a standard payphone there. However in some places in the UK such as near beaches or lakes, or outside police stations, these phones have been replaced with yellow emergency phones. These can not be used as normal phones but simply conenct through to emergency operators. There are meant to be labels next to each button such as “1 – Police; 2 – Ambulance; 3 – Fire”, but these have clearly worn away/peeled off. The fail is still valid, the sign should have been replaced when the phone was installed, but that doesn’t excuse the idiots above who posted comments without engaging their brain first.

  65. Mookie says:

    So to summarize:
    1. Soviet Russia Jokes Are Old
    2. People around here are selectively blind/ retarded /too self-invloved to read the other comments, THUS leading to this ultimate cycle of frustration where every second commentor reiterates what has been said and countered effing 100 times -.-
    3. The US eergency number 911 has a UK counterpart of 999
    4. THE PHONE HAS NO EFFING ‘9′ BUTTON ON THE DISPLAY…. thus the basis for the fail theorem.
    5. FailBlog has developed an internet version of road rage (web rage? forum rage? thread rage? plz to gief eyedeees fur propr nem)
    6. Fail me somehow please

    kthxbai

  66. Lisa says:

    Why is this a fail? In the UK 999 is the US’ 911… fail@phonefail

  67. me says:

    999 is a real emergency number. england uses 999 like USA used 911. toooooooooooools.

  68. Harlin G Hewitt says:

    Gee it looks like you folks aren’t the shiniest apples in the teacher’s desk. It’s blazingly obviously that you pick up the phone and are directly connected to an emergency operator who asks you what service you require. You press either 1, 2, 3 depending on whether you need the police, fire department or ambulance. I feel glad having shed some light on this situation.

  69. phoolish-cat says:

    Reading all these comments took a while, but was very entertaining! Yay for failblog and people who don’t read comments, and for the people who do and reply and make me lol …

  70. Kath says:

    I am only commenting to say that I noticed the fail on this silly phone, and the other Brits who leapt right in there to call out America fail where there wasn’t one are seriously letting the side down.

  71. dolt says:

    401st comment

  72. Klaus says:

    I just came so hard. Someone call 999/911. kthxbai.

  73. Sonucais says:

    Oh my god, I am first again!

  74. T.J. Swoboda says:

    As has already been said, this IS the emergency number in the U.K. Wow, talk about irony and not just in an Alonis way:
    FAIL BLOG FAIL
    Please save yourselves some face and take this one down.

    • Sunny says:

      *sigh* So smart guy show me how to dial 999 on a phone with no nine? If you read enough to see that the U.K. emergency number being 999 had already mentioned how did you manage to miss the bit about no 9 on the phone?

    • Puschel says:

      Please save yourself some face and take your comment down. Oh wait, this is impossible, right? Pity…

  75. BondFan4518 says:

    I can just imagine a situation…

    “Argh! I’ve been bitten by a shark! Nobodies got a phone! Wait! There’s a phone! I’m saved! Now, all I need to is dial 99…oh sh*t”

  76. CJ Tha Kid says:

    ya got it all wrong.

    just keep dialing 9; eventually, you’ll get somebody…

    |the kid|

  77. Rob says:

    This is not a fail. in England that is the number you call for police.
    this photo therefore would have been taken in england.

  78. kikfifluff says:

    you have to hacve a 9 button to press to call 999.
    obvious!

    • Cat says:

      Or, you dial 112 instead. It’s the international emergency number and connects you to emergence services in all european countries.

  79. Ceefax says:

    Seen these phones before, before the text wore away the 3 options would have read something like

    1) 999
    2) Operator
    3) Tourist Information

    Weathering fail, I guess.

  80. dak says:

    let me get this right….

    there’s no 9 on that phone? how did i miss that? i’m so confused. does anyone know the number for 999?

  81. Cat says:

    The really sad thing about the comments (and the sign) is not the blatant idiocy of people not looking properly at the photo, but that no one realised that dialing 112 will also connect you with the emergency services.

    It’s the europe wide version of 999/911

    Idiocy + Ignorance – FAIL

    • EastSide says:

      Ok retard, reading through about 50% of these things, it seems that there should be labels on the phone describing what each of these buttons are supposed to do. 1 – Police, 2 – Your mother, 3 – Your grandmother or some such. Now, who fails? Either it’s these Brits who LIVE IN THAT COUNTRY or . . . you. Let me see, which shall I vote for?

      Fail at REALLY reading previous comments . . . failure x infinity, etcetera.

    • Jennypen says:

      Actually you’re the sixth person to say that 112 is the international emergency number.

      SMARTASS COMMENT FAIL

  82. I am so fucking British! says:

    Oi, you Yanks can kink your knickers! Your sodding 911 isn’t the bloody numbour to call when there’s a spot of bother about the queen’s kingdom! It’s courtesy in the commonwealth to engage 999 to get a bobby, govenour! Oi! Pitch a cricket on a lorry! Crumpet! Oi! England prevails! Wanker! Oi!

  83. RoxyR says:

    The comments on here are ASTOUNDING! So funny!

    This is a clear fail post, until you decide to;
    1. not pay attention and/or bother to read comments
    2. try and over analyse things

    It’s a proper lol FAIL…..WIN!

  84. matt says:

    the fail is the fact that there is no nine on the phone.
    most of you dont seem to realise that this is an emergency phone the its the fact tthat the sign is wrong i used one the other day when some cunt pulled a knife on me tbh the total fail is the lack of effort by the brittish police force and how shit they are

  85. zorg says:

    In the UK, 999 dials you

  86. 999 says:

    i’m here! guess it took yall that long to push 11111111111111111111111….

  87. Jacerm says:

    I officially declare this the most entertaining comment string on FailBlog. There exist as of this point 30 cases of stupid-ignorant-Americans-999-is-the-same-as-911 comments. Isn’t it ironic that the ones accusing others of ignorance are the ones who failed to realize the impossibility of dialing 999 on a phone with the numerals 1, 2, and 3; no-one even made the conjecture that the number 999 was incorrect.
    They must not test for reading comprehension at We-Hate-America school.
    Kudos to the ones who managed to figure out their own failure in a timely fashion and without outside assistance.

    • pclare says:

      Besides, 999 only works for Brits. Americans should still dial 911, because that’s the correct number for emergencies, regardless of what country you’re in.

  88. Jacerm says:

    Also, there are enough comment fails on this page to fill burn of the week until the second coming of Christ.

  89. iHateYouAll says:

    You are all the problem in the world. Thus, I hate you all. And as I am referring to the mass of you idiots as a single entity, the singular use of problem is correct. So sit on it. Especially those of you who repeated 999 like useless parrots. I hope you fail your ways out of the gene pool as soon as can be arranged. That is all.

  90. loqk says:

    Just an interesting note for those claiming that 112 will work

    According to our fine British posters, this is an autodial phone, pressing 1 will dial 999, 2 and 3 will autodial other people.

    You can’t type 999 since there are no nines on the face.

    You can’t dial 112 because pressing one will autodial 999, then 999 again, then the second autodial number. (Emergency services will probably pick up on the first 999 and then get an earful of beeps).

    So you can’t really dial 112 properly either…..

  91. I Fail at Failing says:

    I really can’t believe how many people FAILED at reading about a fail!!! It was a PHONE fail, not a sign fail!

  92. pclare says:

    Besides, 999 will only work for Brits. Americans should still dial 911, because that’s the correct number for emergencies regardless of where you are.

    • Jessi says:

      Well, not really regardless of where you are. If you’re an American in England and you have an emergency situation, 911 isn’t really gonna do you a lot of good.

      From what I’ve heard, anyway.

  93. MedKid says:

    Can I just say this…..

    Everyone who posted here gets an AUTO FAIL…. After post 1,000,000 things get AUTO EPIC FAIL. After that we throw you into a wall. After THAT we just duct-tape you up and throw you in a closet.

    Because everyone knows that duct-tape is the messiah.

  94. JM says:

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but in all the Harry Potter fanfictions they say the British equivalent of 911 is 999. So this picture is not a fail at all. The person who put it up is the fail, because they FAILed to check their info.

  95. AdamW- says:

    failblog.org FAIL ……999 IS THE EMERGENCY PHONE NUMBER IN GREAT BRITAIN…..

  96. I am so fucking British! says:

    Little-known fact: in England, the historic World Trade Center attacks occured on September 99th, 2001.

  97. chris says:

    haha! I forgot about these. Seen one or two down in Cornwall. did want to give them internet homage but someone already has, huzzah.

  98. Ich says:

    Stupid thing, take it out! Emergency number in England is 999 and not 911 like in the US. Look at the BT sign, which tells you British Telecom

  99. w/e says:

    o.O 999 is the emergency # in the United Kingdom.

    Fail within a fail

  100. w/e says:

    Ooh, but then I noticed that there are only 3 numbers. D:

    Fail within a fail of a fail

  101. Failark says:

    Fail at failing

    BRITISH POLICE and HONG KONG POLICE has 999 phone number NOOB

  102. skwirt says:

    yes ewveh ere we dial 999 in emergent scenahrios.

    to ell with the bloody buttons – or lack the’of.

  103. Helen says:

    999 is the emergency number for various countries. Such as England and even Hong kong.
    POSTER FAIL.

  104. Scott says:

    what? this isn’t a fail image 999 is the emergency services number in the UK, the phone box with the BT logo ( British telecoms ) gives it away

  105. Chong says:

    999 is the emergency for China and a few other countries…

  106. casey says:

    I believe this is a fail in itself, In Britian 999 is the equivalent of 911 is it not?

  107. casey says:

    OHHHHHH I see now. It only says 123. Now I have failed. I am stupid.

  108. L says:

    To “I am so fucking British!”: Not all the Commonwealth uses 999. Canada is still a Dominion of England, and therefore part of the Commonwealth, and uses 911, just like the U.S. to the south (and North-west).

  109. Eric says:

    Uuum, the emergancy number in the UK IS 999?

  110. Mike Jones says:

    999 is emergency number in the UK (BT = British Telecom) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/999_(emergency_telephone_number)

  111. Pat says:

    I’m fairly certain the dialing buttons are on the hidden side of the receiver.

  112. 999 Emergency says:

    Not a fail morons, just a different emergency number – it’s 999 in the UK and many other places…. not 911….
    I just love how yanks automatically assume they are right and everyone else is wrong!

  113. Lemur says:

    you tards…… its an english telephone… BT is english company and 999 is the equivalant of 911 in america lol. YOU FAIL!

  114. LD0ne says:

    bs thats a photoshop

  115. Nick says:

    this fail is a FAIL! 999 is the emergency number in the UK. there is nothing wrong here.

  116. JESUS says:

    JESUS CHRIST!

    The Americans and the damn British are being fucking dumb on this fail.

    999 IS correct in the UK, but that doesn’t excuse the idiot who posted this, because he was a dumbfuck enough to point the fail arrow at the 999 part.

    He didnt realize the real fail was the numbers.

    You ALL failed. Somebody please take this off FailBlog.

    It deserves better than this shit.

  117. ajjj says:

    oh christ you are all idiots. 999 is the emergency number equivalent of 911 in England…this photo was obviously taken in england.
    or it was photoshopped and therefore an invalid fail

  118. nomdunchien says:

    First time I see a telephon with only 1, 2 and 3 buttons.

  119. Peter says:

    Fail Fail. BT is British Telecom, and 999 is the emergency number in England.

  120. callum simpson says:

    ur all idiots if any of u had scence ud see that on the phone it has bt on it stands for BRITTISH telecom 999 is the emergency code in britttain there fore there is nothing funny or fail about that it is perfectly legit theres no fAIL and theres no photoshop

  121. callum simpson says:

    my previous comment is wrong i didnt notice that it only has 3 buttons on it im sorry for calling you all idiots apoliges

  122. Matthew Richards says:

    It’s not fake. 999 is the emergency number in Jamaica.

  123. Josiah says:

    Note: in England 999 is the number to call

  124. mae _chan says:

    ::looks up:: (o_0) I only started reading failblog recently but this has got to be the funniest shit I have ever read in my entire life. The posting just continued on and on even after the regular posters got tired of repeating themselves. I do believe this fail has gone past the curve of infinity to become an Epic Win.

  125. Kityara says:

    This is the funniest thread I have ever read. I have no idea if it is FAIL or WIN. It just goes on and on, making the same points over and over and over…

    Actually I agree with mae_chan above, epic win, for pure hilarity.

    Just to continue the trend:

    1. Yes, 999 is indeed the equivalent of the USA’s 911
    2. However, the ‘ fail’ is the lack of a 9 on the phone
    3. This does seem unlikely. However, multiple persons have verified it. 4. There may be other reasons for the lack of keys 4-0. However, who cares? That’s not what failblog is about.

    Have fun all x

  126. ME says:

    People that posted there is not a fail here, are failures. How does one dial 9 on that phone? And why do so many assume that the poster is American and complaining about them thinking its 911. You would likely have to live in Europe to take this picture. Unless it is the USA in which case its a double fail.

  127. Sparda says:

    Seriously? You guys are actually that stupid?

    1) BT stands for British Telecom
    2) 999 is the emergency number in the UK
    3) The fail should be the fact it doesn thave the number 9 on the phone.

  128. lameguy says:

    Someone has never been to England

  129. Ash says:

    umm okay? If this was taken somewhere other than North America then what’s wrong with it? 999 is used instead of 911 in other places in the world.

  130. Ash says:

    oops nevermind just got it haha btw I am not from the states.

  131. The Failer says:

    How Am I Suppose To Call 911 or 999?

  132. p1chu says:

    loool

  133. Zapior27 says:

    omg duh u just dial 9 3’s duh

  134. Izzy says:

    Geez. This is only considered a ‘fail’ if you live in the u.s. (like i do >_>) Do these people really think that 911 is used everywhere? America fails.

    • Izzy says:

      Oh. Observant fail for me. I didn’t notice the lack of a 9 button. I suppose pressing 3 nine times would do?

  135. Sam says:

    Can I just say as amember of the emergency services that checks these phones that yes, it is a fail.

    The old phones used to have all the buttons and were replaced with these new phones with just three buttons – pressing any of the three buttons connects you to the emergency services. The sign above is just older.

    However, technically in the UK you can also dial 112 for emergency services (this is the europe-wide emergency number) so you could dial that, but like I said any button will connect you.

    Can I also add that testing these phones has pitfalls as when you pick the receiver up and put it to your ear you often get an ear full of snail or spider :)


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