Doesn’t matter though, our system now has “911″ redirected to 000 because of all the darn American imported TV shows that say “QUICK DIAL 911!”. So all the kids (and even adults) do it. It’s pretty fail really. So now they put about 100,000+ kids through a wasteful time in specialised education, learning that the number is actually “000″ and not “911″ and also to only use in an “emergency”. >.> I hate school.
I am an American. I lived in England for 8 years. I saw it was correct the moment I looked at it. How true that most Americans are so geographically ignorant and arrogant.
oops, completely missed the fact that there are only three buttons. it reminds me of one of my personal fails where i lost a pencil and realized that it was in my hand when i went to write something down. but still didn’t realized i had it.
No no totally wrong!
There are 3 possible ways to call the 999:
1) press 999 times button 1
2) press 499 times button 2 and one time button 1
3) press 333 times button 3
CHOOSE!
p.s. If the person for whom you are requesting help dies in that period of time, it’s all your fault guys!
yes but do you know the emergeny number that can be used all over Europeand in Britain is usually less busy than 999and which you could type on that phone?
it’s 112, a little general knowledge goes a long way hence i have just shared it with you
Yup, you’re a moron. As everyone else has already pointed out, the phone
has no nine. And I’m really getting sick of everyone blasting all Americans for
not knowing or caring about anything outside of our own border. Not everyone
in our nation is that culturally inept. My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth, and that
most of us are just as ashamed to be included with them in the all-encompassing
‘Dumb American’ moniker as you would be to be lumped in with all the idiots
in your country. Except that you already proved you’re an idiot by telling us
all that 999 is the emergency number in the UK instead of realizing that dialing
three 9s would be difficult on a phone with no 9 button.
“My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…” – Evo7
i know. The only reason america looks stupid is that even stupid people have the right to talk. In communist countries, only the display-people get on tv, or global newspapers. The anti-government people OBViously don’t. it’s cool that on the internet EVERYONE can all spew their top-level “intelligence” and then hash it out with other ppl from all over the world who think they’re dumb!!! internet win
“My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…”
I know! US only looks stupid because everyone here has the right to talk, and most (even the idiots) use that right.
In communist countries, only the display-people are on tv stations and global newspapers. anti-gvrnment people OBViously aren’t. I think it’s cool that EVERYONE on the internet can be as “intelligent” as possible, but then look like complete MOROns in front of the rest of the world…As for the picture, it’s FUNNY!
YOU fail, evo, because the numbers are probably on the handset or behind it. NO NO ONE is so stupid that they would design a phone with only 1 2 3 on it.
Jesus fucking Christ! How many times do we need to tell everyone that that’s not the issue with this phone. It has no nine! Anyone else that says this shit, I’m going to stab you on that beach so you go to that phone and find out what the fuck is wrong with it!
So let me put this to rest, the phone automatically connects to the 999 emergency hot line and then you are given three options: fire, medical emergency, or crime in progress. After that you are patched into the correct dispatch office and a responding unit is sent. Thank you for your time. And yes it could still be considered a fail because you never dial 999. a possible redundancy fail? what are your thoughts?
ok, so if you only meant getting the number 9, then you still failed at understanding what the others meant by their answer. So, you fail either way, it’s ok, we still accept you for who you are.
I understood that the people who posted before me were talking about the phone number, and not the button. But we posted at the same time.
I didn’t fail. I just solved one part of the problem while they solved the whole thing.
Oh well then clearly no fail here I’ll just press the….. WAIT there is NO NINE ON THE PHONE!!!! Well that can’t be the fail, Americans are ignorant of the UK emergency number… the fail is ALWAYS stupid Americans right?
yeah and then people post things that have no relevance, have been said 900 times already and makes commenting completely pointless. it’s not like comments are to make the pictures feel popular.
Yes, did you know that Darth Vader was the fifth member of Led Zeppelin? True story. He was also in Pink Floyd for a while. Helped write “Darth Side of the Moon”.
the conflicts between Russia and Georgia have ended too.. so.. i think we’re allowed to mock everyone ..
wait..we’ve been doing that for a long time now.. ..huh?
Yeah… That part is getting really annoying, isn’t it? If you’re going to post some sort of inane drivel, at least do us the courtesy of making sure no one else has posted the same, yet.
I’d like to read some good joke about 999 being a reversed 666 and the fact that if you need to dial this number with the photo’s phone, you’re proly going to die.
Couldn’t phrase it myself, so some native english speaker do.
Let’s say Fuzz, or Talons or whoever is not willing to add a soviet russia joke.
Kind monsieur may require a good UrbanDictionary for a full translation, however –
999 is the number for three confused Brits trying to achieve mutual fellatio and instead end up [sic] just tossing salad [suc] before tea bag time [soak];
666 would be the number of the Bestiality.
Participation in these practices without protection will cause you to proly die; so it’s recommended for the phone sex only.
I believe you meant “half-twit”, my dear.
And he’s perhaps a fitting candidate of the Upper Class Twit of the Year competition, if he shoots a shotgun off as well as he shoots his mouth off.
Half-wit is a NA saying. as in you aren’t intelligent, you only have half of a wit.
But seriously, what is with the multiple observation fails. one after another.
“it’s a British phone, 999 is the emergency number, it isnt a fail…”
(NA=North America)
Uh, also. Try dialling 911 on that phone. Go on, I dare ya. It’s about as easy as dialling 999, with no 9 button. As has already been pointed out several times.
Reading the other comments – Fail.
Just about all of the other idiot fails apply as well.
Also, very strange way to spell that dead and rotting joke you used for your name. Another fail, perhaps?
I think the rating is messed up.
It says I’m the first to rate while there’s already 45+ comments… :S
If it isn’t messed up, I AM the first to vote. xD
*Maybe*, just maybe, it’s because the numbers are actually on the headset (or whatever it’s called, my brain fails me).
Therefore, you’d just have to pick up the phone, and dial the numbers that we currently can’t see, but may include a 9 ;O
If the phone can only be used in an emergency, why even have buttons, why not have the phone automatically connect with Emergency Services. The buttons may have been labeled at one time to faciilitate the classification of the nature of emergency such as 1 would be Coast Guard, 2 would connect to Police, and 3 would ring the Fire Brigade. Although I’d much rather use a blue Police Call box when in real trouble.
base ten number system FAIL. 999 = 999 in the UK, however 911 is the number for emergency services in the US, whereas in the UK you can dial either 999 or 112.
You know, in England dialing 999 does connect you to those services. I can only assume this was a North American phone, which is why its a fail, otherwise this fail is a fail
for the umpteen fricking millionth time this phone has no 9 button. this is not about international differences in emergency numbers. it is about the fucktard at the factory making a phone that has only 3 digits. last time i say this. i hate repeating the obvious for morons.
Oh, come on then, Suzy! There’s no joy in it for us when you admit your errors. You should defend yourself to the death like Pumpkiny until comments won’t nest below said level.
It’s a shame, too, that there weren’t thirteen thousand other comments pointing out the exact same thing, so you could have read them and avoided making yourself look like such a crotchwaffle.
That particular area located on a woman’s anatomy where the legs come together, i.e.- the naughty bits
Dorothy took great delight in shaving her crotchwaffle and then shooting ping-pong balls out of it.
2. CrotchWaffle
Bre, the herpefied mathlete
“Ew. Bre YOU CROTCHWAFFLE”
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important.
It’s funny how people keep commenting on the Americans’ stupidity with this fail when it’s already been pointed out numerous times that “999″ is an emergency number in the UK.
It’s also hilarious how many people have been going on about how the UK emergency number is 999 while not realising that it’s impossible to dial 999 on any phone that is lacking in a 9 button. You can’t dial 999 if there’s no fricking 9. Yeah? Does that make sense?
I’ll say it again. There is no 9 button on that phone.
By the way, I’m from the UK so I would dial 999. And I can, because MY phone has a nine button, as in a button with the number 9 on it.
I’M SAYING THAT EVERYONE KEEPS SAYING AMERICANS FAIL BECAUSE THEY THINK THIS IS AN AMERICAN PHONE!! WHICH IT’S NOT!!!!!
Understanding simple concepts FAIL
Yes but see almost no one thinks this is an American phone. They just think we are stupid because we don’t know that 999 is like 911. So everyone is blathering on about how it’s 999 in the UK implying that the fail is invalid when of course the fail is the lack of the 9 button on the phone NOT the 999 on the sign.
No, because Americans don’t know anything, and McCain is old, and you’re photoshopped, and I’m FIRST!!!!one!!, and you started a sentence with “but,” so you’re a grammar fail, and your mother is a 9, and bend over and I’ll show you a fire!
.
Or something.
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important.
Well, the arrow points you to what you first need to pay attention to. Then the typed words “Phone Fail” alert your attention to the fail. It’s a pretty basic Failblog formula. People are just dumber and blinder than usual today.
999 is the emergency number in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and more. Thus, this Fail is not a Fail unless this phone is in the United States, which I highly doubt it is. Instead, ignorant American assumptions that everything is done around the world as it is done here is a Fail.
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .
My belt is a mobius strip, and I don’t read what I post, or anything that looks too Sunny. But what gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .
Is it the Americans that are stupid for not knowing that 999 is an emergency number in other parts of the world? OR is it the other parts of the world that are stupid for not noticing that there’s NO FREAKING 9 ON THE PHONE AND NOT READING THE REST OF THE FREAKING THREAD BEFORE POSTING??????????
You go sit in the corner with the this-is-old-and-fake-tards.
ha- once working at an evil electronics retailer which shall remain nameless, some kids called me and tried that bit- they sounded like they were 12- i asked them if they even knew what prince albert was… that shut them up for about 2 seconds… then they asked if my refrigerator was running
S’alright.
Where would you like to be kissed to make it feel better? I’m thinking in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and then some more.
Wow. No one pointed out the BT logo on the phone… British Telecom. Clearly this phone is in Cuba. As can also be inferred by the sign being in Spanish. Duh.
My college spent the better part of a semester installing autodial security phones all over campus. The poles, wiring, lighting, weatherproof housings, and signs were installed weeks before the phones were installed. Some pranksters went around and drew pictures of phone keypads inside the housings, and in one spot someone left a cup with a string that led inside of the wiring hole. Tee hee.
Maybe it’s additive, you need to press the 3 button 333 times, the 2 button 499 times and the 1 button once, the one button 999 times, or some combination of those.
In any of those cases, by the time you’d finished, the emergency would be over and the need to call would be obviated.
First of all if you read the rest of the comment thread you’d know already that the numbers are in the speaker… the other numbers are for speed dial!!! I went there and checked myself!!!
There is only one arrow, which points at the number 999, and that makes some people think it is the main fail and not spot the lacking of the ‘9′ button.
if so… ignorant people thinking 911 is the universal emergency number FAIL x infinity
dumbasses who live inside their own little box and think they know everything and deem everything that doesn’t make sense in their box as fail…. you are the true failures.
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! WE ARE the TRUE FAILURES! We the ones who can see the lack of the nine button on the phone are the dumb asses. I wish someone was around who could help me out of this box! There is no nine in my little box! Help me before I fail again!
In my phone experiences 1, 2 & 3 go across the top of the number pad. Can anyone tell the ignorant American if this is true other places also? Outside of my little box if you will?
I don’t know the engineering details, but I do see in Google images an additional example of a BT phone with just the three buttons alongside a sign instructing users to dial “999.” Conjecture: those signs were affixed independently of the phones.
dude! can we stop this “americans are stupid” bs, please! and all people from the us, don’t bash other cultures! geez, guys, this is seriously pathetic. BE NICE!!!!!!
In the uk, and many other parts of the world where English is spoken and understood by large numbers of the population, 999 is an official emergency number.
Wow use if wikipedia to prove you are an idiot it’s so fail it’s a win! Please now use wikipedia to show me how to dial 999 on a phone with no 9 button. Thanks so much for your help!
Why does everyone go on an on an on about the number 999, yes its the damn emergency number in the UK, but how does one dial 999 if there is no 9 to push?!
in the UK (you know, your ancestors…) you don’t dial 911 but 999 to get connected to the cops, firefighters, etc… so no fake, and NO FAIL… only FAIL are people saying it’s PHOT’ED.
Umm, yeah… my ‘ancestors’ are Korean and German. And everyone always gripes about the U.S. not being knowledgeable when it comes to other countries (or groups of countries, as it were).
OK, if you’ve managed to read the million “Duh fail British 911 is 999 lol” posts and got this far, you deserve an explanation. The sign is clearly very old, and was obviously put there when there was a standard payphone there. However in some places in the UK such as near beaches or lakes, or outside police stations, these phones have been replaced with yellow emergency phones. These can not be used as normal phones but simply conenct through to emergency operators. There are meant to be labels next to each button such as “1 – Police; 2 – Ambulance; 3 – Fire”, but these have clearly worn away/peeled off. The fail is still valid, the sign should have been replaced when the phone was installed, but that doesn’t excuse the idiots above who posted comments without engaging their brain first.
So to summarize:
1. Soviet Russia Jokes Are Old
2. People around here are selectively blind/ retarded /too self-invloved to read the other comments, THUS leading to this ultimate cycle of frustration where every second commentor reiterates what has been said and countered effing 100 times -.-
3. The US eergency number 911 has a UK counterpart of 999
4. THE PHONE HAS NO EFFING ‘9′ BUTTON ON THE DISPLAY…. thus the basis for the fail theorem.
5. FailBlog has developed an internet version of road rage (web rage? forum rage? thread rage? plz to gief eyedeees fur propr nem)
6. Fail me somehow please
it’s because the phone only has “1″ “2″ and “3″ on it. so even if you were in england or whatever and needed to call emergency, you can’t, so haha fuck you lol etc.
Gee it looks like you folks aren’t the shiniest apples in the teacher’s desk. It’s blazingly obviously that you pick up the phone and are directly connected to an emergency operator who asks you what service you require. You press either 1, 2, 3 depending on whether you need the police, fire department or ambulance. I feel glad having shed some light on this situation.
Reading all these comments took a while, but was very entertaining! Yay for failblog and people who don’t read comments, and for the people who do and reply and make me lol …
I am only commenting to say that I noticed the fail on this silly phone, and the other Brits who leapt right in there to call out America fail where there wasn’t one are seriously letting the side down.
As has already been said, this IS the emergency number in the U.K. Wow, talk about irony and not just in an Alonis way:
FAIL BLOG FAIL
Please save yourselves some face and take this one down.
*sigh* So smart guy show me how to dial 999 on a phone with no nine? If you read enough to see that the U.K. emergency number being 999 had already mentioned how did you manage to miss the bit about no 9 on the phone?
The really sad thing about the comments (and the sign) is not the blatant idiocy of people not looking properly at the photo, but that no one realised that dialing 112 will also connect you with the emergency services.
Ok retard, reading through about 50% of these things, it seems that there should be labels on the phone describing what each of these buttons are supposed to do. 1 – Police, 2 – Your mother, 3 – Your grandmother or some such. Now, who fails? Either it’s these Brits who LIVE IN THAT COUNTRY or . . . you. Let me see, which shall I vote for?
Fail at REALLY reading previous comments . . . failure x infinity, etcetera.
Oi, you Yanks can kink your knickers! Your sodding 911 isn’t the bloody numbour to call when there’s a spot of bother about the queen’s kingdom! It’s courtesy in the commonwealth to engage 999 to get a bobby, govenour! Oi! Pitch a cricket on a lorry! Crumpet! Oi! England prevails! Wanker! Oi!
the fail is the fact that there is no nine on the phone.
most of you dont seem to realise that this is an emergency phone the its the fact tthat the sign is wrong i used one the other day when some cunt pulled a knife on me tbh the total fail is the lack of effort by the brittish police force and how shit they are
I officially declare this the most entertaining comment string on FailBlog. There exist as of this point 30 cases of stupid-ignorant-Americans-999-is-the-same-as-911 comments. Isn’t it ironic that the ones accusing others of ignorance are the ones who failed to realize the impossibility of dialing 999 on a phone with the numerals 1, 2, and 3; no-one even made the conjecture that the number 999 was incorrect.
They must not test for reading comprehension at We-Hate-America school.
Kudos to the ones who managed to figure out their own failure in a timely fashion and without outside assistance.
Besides, 999 only works for Brits. Americans should still dial 911, because that’s the correct number for emergencies, regardless of what country you’re in.
You are all the problem in the world. Thus, I hate you all. And as I am referring to the mass of you idiots as a single entity, the singular use of problem is correct. So sit on it. Especially those of you who repeated 999 like useless parrots. I hope you fail your ways out of the gene pool as soon as can be arranged. That is all.
Maybe pressing 3 nine times would do it?
I tip my hat to you, sir.
Uhhh… Completly photoshoped. there is a 9 its sadly been attempted to cover it up with some yellow and the actual word “fail” so fail @ bad photoshop
I see it, I see the fakeness.
Not faked. I know this phone – it’s on Holkam beach in Norfolk. I’ve got some pictures of this. Should have uploaded them ages ago. (Fail failure?)
This is not fake, I saw one of these phones in whales last week.
I saw one in dolphins.
Win
This win is porpoiseless.
(Terrible pun fail.)
Also, “spelling parts of Britain” fail.
who r u pinocchio? did u dial 999 to get out? you could have used ur massive nose to dial, from all ur lies!
definatley not a real boy!
they dial 999 in london and areas in europe
Yes they do and also in Australia. Goes to show a few idiots in here live in America where they think they’re in the centre of the world.
America fails. ^_^
Goes to show a few idiots in here haven’t been to Australia either. since when do we dial 999? it’s 000
Quite true! Glad to see an Aussie.
Doesn’t matter though, our system now has “911″ redirected to 000 because of all the darn American imported TV shows that say “QUICK DIAL 911!”. So all the kids (and even adults) do it. It’s pretty fail really. So now they put about 100,000+ kids through a wasteful time in specialised education, learning that the number is actually “000″ and not “911″ and also to only use in an “emergency”. >.> I hate school.
I am an American. I lived in England for 8 years. I saw it was correct the moment I looked at it. How true that most Americans are so geographically ignorant and arrogant.
oops, completely missed the fact that there are only three buttons. it reminds me of one of my personal fails where i lost a pencil and realized that it was in my hand when i went to write something down. but still didn’t realized i had it.
999 is the emergency no in the UK so not really sure it’s a fail here..
I think the fail is that the sign says to dial “999″ and there are only the numbers 1, 2 and 3 on the keypad. Looks Photoshop’d
Shutup.
it doesn’t even seem to be working…
don’t ruin it! some people actually believed it!
sure ill dial nine
*blinks and looks at numbers*
wait there is no nine,
*meanwhile a very serious disaster is happening*
lol
no i have seen unetdied pictures. i don’t think it is photo shopped.
Actually, 999 is an emergency number in certain places, so
MEGA FAIL FOR EVERYONE. You guys are dumbasses.
Umm… you guys do realize that 999 is the emergency number in England right?
AND scotland may i add
lets just hit #1, 27x
It’s like an old rotary phone, you can pick it up and push the hangup lever 9 times, pause, 9 times, pause 9 times – equivalent of dialing 999.
over-complication win.
Know what works similarly for computers? Alt F4 ant the same time. Try it!
Unfortunately I do not own a F4 ant. sounds cool though, like a Soviet Russian race car
Competence-in-emergency win.
… and now go backwards in time and subtract one.
Just press the 1 one thousand times, …
The really obvious thing to do would be to type in every combination of buttons till you get a conection
I’m going to have told you how to do it in a time reversal. But first some other “me” is going to saying something really obvious.
But finally I arrived, at the World-Famous, Albuquerque Holiday Inn!
Hey, you’ve got weasles on your face.
Besides, now he’s got a really cute nickname – Torso-Boy.
That’s 27 combinations dickwad! 3 cubed >.<
No no totally wrong!
There are 3 possible ways to call the 999:
1) press 999 times button 1
2) press 499 times button 2 and one time button 1
3) press 333 times button 3
CHOOSE!
p.s. If the person for whom you are requesting help dies in that period of time, it’s all your fault guys!
Oh I forgot.
If you are highly skilled you may press 499 times button 2 and then half press it for the 999.
My ancestors knew how to handle something like that. Just start a fire and send up smoke signals.
That’s what I was thinking.
[From Albequerque, the song]
If you’d like to make a call, hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your oooooooooperator!
“…And my lucky lucky autographed, glow-in-the-dark snorkle.”
Weird Al win!
you guys are all morons.
999 is the UK’s equivalent to the American 911.
get some culture.
The “999″ is not the supposed fail, it’s the lack of the number 9 on the keypad.
Yeah, well, the fact that it says EMERGENCY PHONE probably already told them…
How does that change the anything?
Erm.. Sorry to jump in here, but you could actually just call 112 (international emergancy services)
Problem solved!
yes but do you know the emergeny number that can be used all over Europeand in Britain is usually less busy than 999and which you could type on that phone?
it’s 112, a little general knowledge goes a long way hence i have just shared it with you
Noticing the true fail, fail!
Yup, you’re a moron. As everyone else has already pointed out, the phone
has no nine. And I’m really getting sick of everyone blasting all Americans for
not knowing or caring about anything outside of our own border. Not everyone
in our nation is that culturally inept. My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth, and that
most of us are just as ashamed to be included with them in the all-encompassing
‘Dumb American’ moniker as you would be to be lumped in with all the idiots
in your country. Except that you already proved you’re an idiot by telling us
all that 999 is the emergency number in the UK instead of realizing that dialing
three 9s would be difficult on a phone with no 9 button.
“My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…” – Evo7
i know. The only reason america looks stupid is that even stupid people have the right to talk. In communist countries, only the display-people get on tv, or global newspapers. The anti-government people OBViously don’t. it’s cool that on the internet EVERYONE can all spew their top-level “intelligence” and then hash it out with other ppl from all over the world who think they’re dumb!!! internet win
Americans look stupid when they appear to split the world into Americans and Commies…
Freedom of speech isn’t just an American thing, you know.
“My bet is that the percentage of morons in
the US is roughly equal to that of every other nation on Earth,…”
I know! US only looks stupid because everyone here has the right to talk, and most (even the idiots) use that right.
In communist countries, only the display-people are on tv stations and global newspapers. anti-gvrnment people OBViously aren’t. I think it’s cool that EVERYONE on the internet can be as “intelligent” as possible, but then look like complete MOROns in front of the rest of the world…As for the picture, it’s FUNNY!
YOU fail, evo, because the numbers are probably on the handset or behind it. NO NO ONE is so stupid that they would design a phone with only 1 2 3 on it.
how ’bout kazakhstan?
uh… Sorry to burst multiple bubbles, but this is an actual photo of a UK public phone. The emergency number there, instead of 911, is 999.
That still doesn’t change the fact that there’s no sodding ‘9′ button.
this has to be a joke.
Jesus fucking Christ! How many times do we need to tell everyone that that’s not the issue with this phone. It has no nine! Anyone else that says this shit, I’m going to stab you on that beach so you go to that phone and find out what the fuck is wrong with it!
The numbers are probably on the phone itself, or behind it, where you can’t see it. Not sure what the ‘1′ ‘2′ ‘3′ are for.
thats what i thought!!!
So let me put this to rest, the phone automatically connects to the 999 emergency hot line and then you are given three options: fire, medical emergency, or crime in progress. After that you are patched into the correct dispatch office and a responding unit is sent. Thank you for your time. And yes it could still be considered a fail because you never dial 999. a possible redundancy fail? what are your thoughts?
999 is the equivalent of 911 in Britain and many European countries. Maybe it is foreign made or *gasp* in a country where 999 is correct?
um 999 = british version of 911 the fail is a fail
999 is the Great Britain emergency number. Not every country in the world uses 911…
or 27 times. since 3 times 3 is nine, and nine times 3 is 27.
Would it be the 3 button 9 times?
Why no just dial “112″? That’s the European emergency number, btw.
Minger ftw !
Never heard of it working here in the UK.
It has done for many many years. It works in most of the world.
*nod*
that’s the italian number for the police it does’t work in the uk (I live in Italy for a few months a year)
You just have to punch 3, three times.
Math fail.
3 x 3 = 9.. You have to press 9 three times in a row. You’re the fail.
I meant to substitute for a “9″ button. Not to type in the phone number.
Interpreting suggestion fail.
Covering your ass so you don’t look stoopid.. win?
No.
Again. Interpretation fail.
Obviously.
No, I think we’ve clearly identified you as a moron.
I’m not a moron.
It’s obvious I meant to get the button 9.
After all, it’s the phone that’s the fail. Not the phone number.
But you were referring to the previous post.
Therefore even if you were referring to the “9″ and not the “999″
you, sir, are FAIL
I was not referring to the previous post,
the first 3 posts were all posted at the same time.
JUST TAKE THE DAMN FAIL!!
STOP TRYING TO COVER UP YOUR ASS!!
…….WHERE THE HELL ARE MY PILLS?!?!…
DANG..
*storms off the failblog*
(Hee hee…don’t tell b.p., but I hid them.)
(unmedicated temper tantrums wont nest below this level)
no more tantrums.
sorry sorry..
*pads own head*
That’s funny stuff! Entertainment – WIN!
Making Pumpkiny and B.P. have a conniption win?
ok, so if you only meant getting the number 9, then you still failed at understanding what the others meant by their answer. So, you fail either way, it’s ok, we still accept you for who you are.
I understood that the people who posted before me were talking about the phone number, and not the button. But we posted at the same time.
I didn’t fail. I just solved one part of the problem while they solved the whole thing.
Presistence WIN!
ooo, POSTING/SPELLING FAIL.
“persistence”
(my bad)
I’m just trying to prove my point. >.>
Point proving – FAIL
Being annoying – WIN
We get your point, Pumpkiny. We just don’t choose to believe you!
get a life… EVERYONE OF YOU!
Your loss.
Pumpkiny:
Attention whoring always leads to FAIL
I’ll take your life, RedKurtain.
This thread, I’ve swallowed it. Now i’m pulling it out of my ass.
If you take a liiiiife
Do you know what you give?
Odds are you won’t liiiiike what it iiiiiis.
I got the point.
But…taking self MUCH too seriously fail anyway.
It’s been established I have a double life and my friends
won’t to tell you the half of it.
That’s right… we can’t to tell you.
Can’t or won’t … get your damn words straight, woman.
I’m sorry. You’re right. You’re not a moron.
You’re jerk moron.
At least it was a win! ^_~
Nah, covering his ass so you don’t look stoopid.. FAIL.
nah. he failed in covering up, too.
*is a woman*
That explains the math error. You are forgiven.
Your mom is a math error.
._.
corny mom joke WIN!
I smell a burn of the week here already…somewhere
What exactly does it take to get a *burn of the week* comment. 905 of the time someone writes that, its about something dumb.
*meant 90%
Well usually it starts with someone saying something stupid (this would be you).
ooo ya got me
**giggle** We should all be barefoot, pregnant, and in the kitchen, right? MAKE ME A SAMMICH, WOMAM
*inconspicuously spreads arsenic between the other condiments*
Oh, where did you find spreadable arsenic?
I’ve been looking for ages.
Me, too. I enjoy things that spread for me.
You must LOVE your waistline, then. :p
Heeheehee. X)
Haha. I’m so fat!
Or maybe it’s your bald spot you’re so fond of…?
SUDO make me a sandwich !
XKCD FTW
FTW!
FTWZ
Obscure joke WIN!!! XD
Nah, I’ve never been into the preggers thing, although, now that you mention it I am a bit peckish…
Most people aren’t into diseases, I guess.
Because Dragonwriter is a womam. Duh! :[
Making the Dragon belly-laugh WIN!
Fold my laundry bitch!
Suck my noodle!
Q: Why dont women need to wear watches?
A: because there’s a clock on the stove.
Why did the woman cross the road?
…
…
I don’t know, but she’d better get her ass back in the kitchen!
haha, very good haha.
hmm, theres the one most have heard:
Q: What do you say to woman with a black eye?
A: Nothing, you already told her once.
Haha, rock on!
What’s the first thing a woman does when she gets back from the battered women’s clinic?
…
…
The god damned dishes if she knows what’s good for her.
Q:why do women have smaller feet than men?
A:so they can stnd closer to the sink
HAHA i hadnt heard those ones before, nice!
wow you guys are idiots.
the older version of you was funnier.
Who says this version hasn’t come packed with new, improved and more fail?
Did anyone say ‘bloated’ ?
so what is this bloated feeling women on tv are always talking about?
is it when you put on weight?
The majority are….
Upgrade to version 3.0!!!
Fixes:
-WIN bug fixed
Additions:
-More FAIL
-Wittier commentary(upgraded from 1st grade to 9th)
Indeed.
Actually, it explains a lot! – Still entertainment – WIN!
then why is it a math fail?
WTF are you talking about??? You have to press the 3 button 333 times to get 999.
Kind of sucks when it is an emergency…
Yea, but who has the time to press a button over three hundred times in an emergency?
Panicking win ?
Actually you’d only have to press it 9 times.
You fail! Think about it– would you press the 9 button 111 times to get 999?
Yes, just like you would get 333 by pressing 3 111 times too, right?
3+3+3=9, 3+3+3=9, 3+3+3=9………….you press three 9 times, not 333. how many fails do we have to have here?
Maybe he speaks exponentially, not arithmetically?
That’s still a fail.
Well I’m pretty sure even if you did press the ‘3′ button 9 times, you still wouldn’t get emergency.
or they could phone 112…
Simplicity and alternative option WIN. I love you yo momma and I love yo momma too
THANK YOU!!!
but…what if they’re in Belize? Or Australia? Or, or…or….Oregon??
then you’re screwed
FOURTH
You’re like 7th…
This is a Fail Fail. 999 is what you dial for emergency services across the pond, and maybe other places as well.
Perception fail. Count the buttons, Retarded.
Retarded is as Retarded does.
Watch it.
and there’s 3 buttons on the phone. this is the fail.
I hate you. You go to hell, you die!
THERE’S NO SODDING ‘9′ BUTTON!
it’s in the uk, 999 is emergency number.
COMMENT FAIL: There’s only three buttons.
I think we got that. Where’s the number 9 on the phone? Reading comprehension fail.
it is CLEARLY obvious that the other 7 digits have melted off. duh.
Oh, is it near that secret bunker?
no just your mouth.
Lolcattus had such class, kindness, and wit –
you don’t even belong on the same page.
Yeah, but the phone has no 9 on it.
I had the same problem the other day. I tried to call 911 but I couldn’t find the 11 button.
Common Urban Legend WIN!
WIN.
Duh, we get that, but the point being made is that there is no 9 button.
Where is Captain Obvious at this crucial juncture????
Oh well then clearly no fail here I’ll just press the….. WAIT there is NO NINE ON THE PHONE!!!! Well that can’t be the fail, Americans are ignorant of the UK emergency number… the fail is ALWAYS stupid Americans right?
I love you from the heart of my bottom.
no, the failure is British teeth being straight…
The fail isn’t American stupidity. It’s just all-around stupidity. There’s a 9 in 911 too.
I’m going to kick you until there’s nothing left to kick.
no shit sherlock
This was better when there were not 750 comments on every single fail. It’s getting lamer than lol cats
So don’t read the comments. Seems like a reasonable solution.
**WINNER**
yeah and then people post things that have no relevance, have been said 900 times already and makes commenting completely pointless. it’s not like comments are to make the pictures feel popular.
John Paul Jones, bassist of Led Zeppellin, was a really great bass player.
Except it was spelt ‘zeppelin’ at the time.
I had a goldfish once.
I have a mouse.
My first goldfish died in 3 days. I got it at a birthday party.
I like cheese.
And now for something completely different …
I like cheese.
The Larch
“How not to be seen.”
mm spelt zeppelin, the best folk bread ever created. 100% fiber and soul.
James Earl Jones has deep bass voice – I wonder if there is a connection?
bass? i thought it was more of a trout
Come over here and I’ll show you a trouser trout…
I have a trouser snake. mine isn’t flat and smelly
Yes, did you know that Darth Vader was the fifth member of Led Zeppelin? True story. He was also in Pink Floyd for a while. Helped write “Darth Side of the Moon”.
Watch it.
Rogue three??? Rogue three????
sometimes I run it so deep that it puts her butt to sleep.
… but… won’t the pictures get sad and lonely? They need love, too, damnit! WHY WON”T YOU LOVE THEM? AND ME?
I don’t see 750 comments on any single fail; you should check the butt-ins at your phone.
Must be where the missing numbers on the phone went!
they defected to lolcats, didn’t you hear?
nawt akshually troo, nawt awl of dem
Lolcattus is nawt askshully defective hardli enny.
damn it i fell on the lolspeak wagon again! I iz roooned fo evah! Take my postrphes and my corner of grammarian corner . . . Sniff
s’ok … u can’t hep it that you choosed yur own destiny.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
We can’t haz Grammarian’s Corner wifout Lolcattus!
In Soviet Russia coast guard calls you
Hey, I think I read somewhere that these aren’t funny anymore. /shrug
Yeah, especially given the current world news. There are a million other jokes to choose from people.
Uhhh, thats not soviet Russia, thats not been around since the end
of the cold war
The Cold War ended?
the conflicts between Russia and Georgia have ended too.. so.. i think we’re allowed to mock everyone ..
wait..we’ve been doing that for a long time now.. ..huh?
Check the news again.
nah. I’ll wait for tomorrows paper.
“I can’t check the news, I might hear that Russian tanks are still in Georgia, thereby proving me wrong.”
Old habits die hard for them.
In Soviet Union, million other jokes choose you!
In Soviet Russia, funny reads you!
In Russia your Georgian base belong to us!
They’ll invade Alabama next.
Just push the 3 buton nine times
Wow, I can’t believe nobody has suggested that yet!! YOU’RE F’ING BRILLIANT!!!
Win.
PHOTOSHOP!!!
Because phones have not been invented yet!
duh!!!
In the UK, 999 is the emergency number. I don’t see anything remotely “fail” about this picture; it was probably taken in Britain.
Except there is no “9″ on the phone…
*head splodes from reading the exact same comments over and over*
Yeah… That part is getting really annoying, isn’t it? If you’re going to post some sort of inane drivel, at least do us the courtesy of making sure no one else has posted the same, yet.
**scoops up some brains** Mmmmmmmm, zombie food!
other than the fact that there is no “9″ button? You guys are strange over there…
I’d like to read some good joke about 999 being a reversed 666 and the fact that if you need to dial this number with the photo’s phone, you’re proly going to die.
Couldn’t phrase it myself, so some native english speaker do.
Let’s say Fuzz, or Talons or whoever is not willing to add a soviet russia joke.
Kind monsieur may require a good UrbanDictionary for a full translation, however –
999 is the number for three confused Brits trying to achieve mutual fellatio and instead end up [sic] just tossing salad [suc] before tea bag time [soak];
666 would be the number of the Bestiality.
Participation in these practices without protection will cause you to proly die; so it’s recommended for the phone sex only.
*sticks a “Seal of Solomon Approval” sticker on fuzz’s post*
Thanks a lot. ^^
bien sûr
….the numbers stop at 3
seeing fail
The 9 is in braille. That solves it!
The BT logo kind of gives it away.
The person that thought this was fail is the person with the MAJOR FAIL!
Get off your high horse and look at the picture properly
fail to notice the obvious fail
this bitch is blind!
The picture is of British Telecom phone. In Great Britain, you dial “999″ for emergencies. 911 is a North American thing.
Apparently having the buttons needed to dial for an emergency actually on the phone is also a North American thing, you half-wit.
I believe you meant “half-twit”, my dear.
And he’s perhaps a fitting candidate of the Upper Class Twit of the Year competition, if he shoots a shotgun off as well as he shoots his mouth off.
Assuming he doesn’t run himself over first.
No its called a half-wit idiot
Half-wit
Main Entry: half-wit
Part of Speech: noun
Synonyms: blockhead, dolt, dummy, dunce, fool, idiot, moron, nitwit, numskull, simpleton
Half-wit is a NA saying. as in you aren’t intelligent, you only have half of a wit.
But seriously, what is with the multiple observation fails. one after another.
“it’s a British phone, 999 is the emergency number, it isnt a fail…”
(NA=North America)
Burn.
That is GREAT!!!!
Uh, also. Try dialling 911 on that phone. Go on, I dare ya. It’s about as easy as dialling 999, with no 9 button. As has already been pointed out several times.
Noticing the obvious FAIL
my god, am I stuck in Groundhog Day?
How is it that you noticed the British Telecom logo but missed the lack of a nine button and almost every comment up until this point?
Actually, the U.S. copied the 999 idea from the UK, where it had been in use for many years, but for some reason used 911 instead.
Look at the state of thing thing… can you really expect the sign above it to be rgiht?
Look at the state of your comment comment…can you really expect “rgiht” to be the correct spelling for “right”?
Look at the state of your ruling ruling one — guess they don’t call you the ruler of a monstrous embodiment of primordial chaos for nothing.
Look at the state of all of your keyboard stuttering. F-ff-fail.
Look at the state of your …. zz ….
My mistakes aren’t on a sign in a public place, I don’t care if I fail in spelling.
Anyway, why are you defending the phone? You like it really…
place previous comment here. placement fail =\
whoops, I take it back, you woke me back up:
Look at the state of all your comment entry stuttering.
2+2+3+2
3+3+3
Addition Win
The game’s up, Scarlet. There are no more bullets left in that gun.
999 is a red herring.
I thought it was an albatross. . . with GREAT, BIG, LOOOOOONGG WINNNGS!
Phones don’t do maths. You all failed.
If we fail, you failed.
Infallible creator FAIL.
Hey, God, would you give me a good reference???
I dont get it!!! Thats the UK emergancy number!! the numbers on a phone go 0 up to 9!! Americans – Fail!!
Reading the other comments – Fail.
Just about all of the other idiot fails apply as well.
Also, very strange way to spell that dead and rotting joke you used for your name. Another fail, perhaps?
Insulting innocent bystander –> WIN
There, there, Khaaaaaaaan. We know you’re not rotting. That’s just the smell coming from Sara’s handbag.
*slams dick in car door*
Well, you obviously weren’t using it for anything.
ZING!!!
a doorstop at times.
So that would make it detachable? Do you keep it in a box by your bed?
No, but once i found it at a flea market, the guy wanted 20, but I got him down to $5.
King Missile win.
I think the rating is messed up.
It says I’m the first to rate while there’s already 45+ comments… :S
If it isn’t messed up, I AM the first to vote. xD
Failblog Voter Apathy? Where the hell is Diddy when you need him?
*Maybe*, just maybe, it’s because the numbers are actually on the headset (or whatever it’s called, my brain fails me).
Therefore, you’d just have to pick up the phone, and dial the numbers that we currently can’t see, but may include a 9 ;O
Who said you could come out of your cubicle?
If the phone can only be used in an emergency, why even have buttons, why not have the phone automatically connect with Emergency Services. The buttons may have been labeled at one time to faciilitate the classification of the nature of emergency such as 1 would be Coast Guard, 2 would connect to Police, and 3 would ring the Fire Brigade. Although I’d much rather use a blue Police Call box when in real trouble.
Because then it wouldn’t be a fail and we wouldn’t be discussing it right now.
Maybe you’re just supposed to read the sign, look at the lack of 9 and bludgeon yourself with the handset until the emergency is over.
love is in the air
Er … 999 = 911 in the UK.
base ten number system FAIL. 999 = 999 in the UK, however 911 is the number for emergency services in the US, whereas in the UK you can dial either 999 or 112.
*facepalm*
…Yes, I know I just set another orangutan on fire, but the situation seemed to warrant it.
You know, in England dialing 999 does connect you to those services. I can only assume this was a North American phone, which is why its a fail, otherwise this fail is a fail
No because even if it was in North America, tell me how YOU would dial 911?
for the umpteen fricking millionth time this phone has no 9 button. this is not about international differences in emergency numbers. it is about the fucktard at the factory making a phone that has only 3 digits. last time i say this. i hate repeating the obvious for morons.
No, no, no NO! We kicked all the FAIL out of North America about 200 years ago!
Maybe it’s not even a phone fail at all.
Maybe it’s an Emergency phone line win, and a caller fail!
lol oh nvm my comment I must be fucking wiped out not to notice it only has three numbers…Im an idiot…:P
Oh, come on then, Suzy! There’s no joy in it for us when you admit your errors. You should defend yourself to the death like Pumpkiny until comments won’t nest below said level.
Stupid humility
Little Suzy woke up!
All her friends will say, “oooh – la – la !!”
Everly Bros reference = WIN!!
… don’t you mean Simon and Garfunkel?
Everly’s did it first and most famously.
( The Simpson’s have yet to do it. )
Dammit…you’ve got it stuck in my head now.
It’s a shame, too, that there weren’t thirteen thousand other comments pointing out the exact same thing, so you could have read them and avoided making yourself look like such a crotchwaffle.
1. crotchwaffle
That particular area located on a woman’s anatomy where the legs come together, i.e.- the naughty bits
Dorothy took great delight in shaving her crotchwaffle and then shooting ping-pong balls out of it.
2. CrotchWaffle
Bre, the herpefied mathlete
“Ew. Bre YOU CROTCHWAFFLE”
I looked it up and I still don’t get it.
Wow.
Brilliant!
Thank you for revisiting that term. I KNEW there was something missing in my life!!!!
Isn’t there also an alternative number?
112 I think it is.
Although the sign does say ring 999…
Maybe it’s an idiot trap.
Or maybe I’m just an idiot.
(In Soviet Russia, idiot traps you!… had to be done.)
I think 112 is used in mainland Europe.
I’m leaning towards you’re an idiot!
Leaning? I’ve already fallen over and sunk 6 inches into the ground.
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important.
It’s funny how people keep commenting on the Americans’ stupidity with this fail when it’s already been pointed out numerous times that “999″ is an emergency number in the UK.
Yes it is.
It’s also hilarious how many people have been going on about how the UK emergency number is 999 while not realising that it’s impossible to dial 999 on any phone that is lacking in a 9 button. You can’t dial 999 if there’s no fricking 9. Yeah? Does that make sense?
I’ll say it again. There is no 9 button on that phone.
By the way, I’m from the UK so I would dial 999. And I can, because MY phone has a nine button, as in a button with the number 9 on it.
Thinking before posting FAIL
The point I was trying to make was that this phone could be in the UK, for all we know.
Thinking in general FAIL
Good lord! You still FAIL for not even reading his reply!
THE PHONE HAS NO NINE BUTTON. HOW CAN YOU HIT 9 WHEN THERE IS NO NINE, EVEN IF YOU ARE IN THE UK?
I’M SAYING THAT EVERYONE KEEPS SAYING AMERICANS FAIL BECAUSE THEY THINK THIS IS AN AMERICAN PHONE!! WHICH IT’S NOT!!!!!
Understanding simple concepts FAIL
HA HA HA!! Look Mommy, it’s a Crotchwaffle circus! Yay!! Look at ‘em go!
Pumpkiny,
you were a lot better off when you were quietly reading the posts.
Stay away from the “Reply” button.
It doesn’t matter if the phone is on god damn Mars at this point.
Oh Klaus, you are wonderful.
Oh, and where do i purchase a ticket to the crotchwaffle circus???? Anyone???? Bueller??? Bueller???
Yes but see almost no one thinks this is an American phone. They just think we are stupid because we don’t know that 999 is like 911. So everyone is blathering on about how it’s 999 in the UK implying that the fail is invalid when of course the fail is the lack of the 9 button on the phone NOT the 999 on the sign.
You are so full of fail, but I love your chutzpa for defending said fail to the death! Marry me?
Is chutzpa another “crotchwaffle”?
… yes.
I thought they still only had Police Public Call Boxes!
They have phones over there? I assumed everything was done with carrier pigeons!
Carrier pigeons? I thought they used smoke signals.
But do they have a nine on their fire?
No, because Americans don’t know anything, and McCain is old, and you’re photoshopped, and I’m FIRST!!!!one!!, and you started a sentence with “but,” so you’re a grammar fail, and your mother is a 9, and bend over and I’ll show you a fire!
.
Or something.
you forgot soviet russia
in soviet russia retarded jokes forget you.
Only one, but depends on the Time And Relative Dimension In Space.
I hear bigger on the inside than outside, too.
Thats what she said
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important.
Wow that looks familiar!
What?! Are you accusing me of looking like a moron or something?!
Don’t make me take off my mobius.
(scroll down)
Oooh Take off the belt! Maybe then this will all end. ;-P
Sounds like a beginning to me … ?
Really? They start with the belt do they? How forward! More like a middle for me. What does happen if you undo the mobius?
Things without all remedy
Should be without regard …
Bend over and twist and I’ll show you a Möbius strip.
Distraction fail. The arrow actually makes it take longer to get it.
Well, the arrow points you to what you first need to pay attention to. Then the typed words “Phone Fail” alert your attention to the fail. It’s a pretty basic Failblog formula. People are just dumber and blinder than usual today.
In Soviet Russia, FAIL phones YOU!
In Soviet Russia, DrDr dies a slow and painful death
I don’t think that comment is in keeping with the theme of the joke.
In Failblog Comments Section, Winfail fails to win and DrDr doesn’t think.
photoshop fail.
999 is the emergency number in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and more. Thus, this Fail is not a Fail unless this phone is in the United States, which I highly doubt it is. Instead, ignorant American assumptions that everything is done around the world as it is done here is a Fail.
Ok, which button do you push for 9? 1, 2, or 3?
yet another person who doesn’t get the fail. ironically, you’re being a prime example of an ignorant American.
the fail is that the phone does not have a ‘9′ button.
What gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .
They must have started the LHC. Our space-time seems to be stuck in a mobius strip.
My belt is a mobius strip, and I don’t read what I post, or anything that looks too Sunny. But what gets me is all the people who fail to read the other posts before posting. Reading them would help them avoid looking like morons because they didn’t notice that the numbers only go to three on the phone. I guess pointing out that Americans don’t always know everything is more important .
That assumption is clear as .. the buttons on my phone??
Is it the Americans that are stupid for not knowing that 999 is an emergency number in other parts of the world? OR is it the other parts of the world that are stupid for not noticing that there’s NO FREAKING 9 ON THE PHONE AND NOT READING THE REST OF THE FREAKING THREAD BEFORE POSTING??????????
You go sit in the corner with the this-is-old-and-fake-tards.
Ignorant twat can’t see that there is not a number 9 fail.
Am I gonna have to choke a bitch?
This will certainly cut down on the number of people you can crank call from this phone. HA! Lets see you little punks call me now!
But do you have Prince Albert in a can?
ha- once working at an evil electronics retailer which shall remain nameless, some kids called me and tried that bit- they sounded like they were 12- i asked them if they even knew what prince albert was… that shut them up for about 2 seconds… then they asked if my refrigerator was running
You should get your name changed from Hugh Jass. That’d help, too.
My apologies for not noticing there are no 9s on the phone – I thought the fail was simply regarding the number 999 as opposed to 911.
S’alright.
Where would you like to be kissed to make it feel better? I’m thinking in the UK, Ireland, Poland, many Commonwealth countries, the UAE, Hong Kong, and then some more.
And yet you still look like an idiot.
Uhm, just start mashing buttons WIN?
Umm… 999 is the emergency number in UK.
Your fail Fails!!!
Umm… 999 is the emergency number in UK.
Your fail Fails!!!
Umm… 999 is the emergency number in UK.
Your fail Fails!!!
Why is this a fail? In the UK you dial 999 for emergencies. Country identification fail.
OOPS. My own fail for not looking at the phone.
You also fail by NOT READING COMMENTS before you post.
Die.
comments my ass. it’s pretty apparent just looking at the picture that dialing 999 on that phone would not go so well.
“Hee haw,” comments my donkey.
If you push 2 and 3 at the same time, it does 2*3=6. And 6 is topsy-turvy 9, therefore try to push it while standing on your head.
‘Whacky’ personality FAIL
PATHETIC! You fail at being clever.
People the numbers on the phone are in the speaker as soon as you pick it up you can see them… I went there and checked it myself!!!
Exposition WIN!! :O
BRITISH TELECOM WIN, FAILBLOG FAIL
Hahaha! Seriously! Failblog gets the BURN of the week!!!
You saw the British Telecom logo? Did you also see the nine button?
I went there too, for serious. Drove all the way from Canada.
Wow. No one pointed out the BT logo on the phone… British Telecom. Clearly this phone is in Cuba. As can also be inferred by the sign being in Spanish. Duh.
The sign is in English, and unless there’s a nine button concealed behind the logo, it’s still a fail.
Maxwell Murder Win?
He ain’t Jack the Ripper he’s your ordinary crook, calling Maxwell murder for you!
photoshop fail!
Just because you can’t see the numbers 4 through 9 (and zero) doesn’t mean their not there.
I believe emergency phones tend to have their numbers on the receiver.
Except for the 1-2-3, of course. They’re not good enough.
My college spent the better part of a semester installing autodial security phones all over campus. The poles, wiring, lighting, weatherproof housings, and signs were installed weeks before the phones were installed. Some pranksters went around and drew pictures of phone keypads inside the housings, and in one spot someone left a cup with a string that led inside of the wiring hole. Tee hee.
Actually, this isnt a phone fail, its a photoshop fail.
Maybe it’s additive, you need to press the 3 button 333 times, the 2 button 499 times and the 1 button once, the one button 999 times, or some combination of those.
In any of those cases, by the time you’d finished, the emergency would be over and the need to call would be obviated.
Lazy call centre win?
I think we discovered Steven Wright’s phone. He had a phone that had no “7″ so he could not call his friend.
ummm… i was there a joke in there somewhere?
urgh, drop the i
i thought you were K for a second
Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
Seeing as BT stands for British Telecom, the phone is somewhere in the UK, and thus is not a fail.
Ivana trumps!
Tell us why not, Ivana.
First of all if you read the rest of the comment thread you’d know already that the numbers are in the speaker… the other numbers are for speed dial!!! I went there and checked myself!!!
NO YOU EFFING DIDN’T. I DID. I CAMPED OUT THERE ALL EFFING NIGHT AND NEVER SAW YOU.
Pfft!!! I was the guy with the red hoodie!!! remember I asked for the time?
I had no idea that reading was a sport in the Special Olympics.
You saw the logo, but missed the lack of any number above 3?
There is only one arrow, which points at the number 999, and that makes some people think it is the main fail and not spot the lacking of the ‘9′ button.
Yeah, there should be another arrow pointing to where the nine button isn’t.
3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3
Congrats, you’re calling 999
end of FAIL
3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3 = 27.
You have a long way to go to get to 999.
Mathematics FAIL.
3+3+3
wait
3+3+3
wait
3+3+3
wait
dialing 999…
Well, it is inherently obvious to even the most casual observer that they meant dial “999″ in base 4 where you’d actually dial “33213″… *tips hat*
Nice, except base 4 is completely useless for anything else.
Resuscitating useless base number system FAIL.
3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3+3 = 27
You’ll have to push that 3 button a few more times to get to 999.
Mathematics FAIL.
It’s the Cinco Fail-a-phone!
Am I the first to say that ‘999′ is the emergency number for England?
Yes.
yeah but how are you suppose to dial 999 when the buttons are 1,2,3?
You retards. 999 is the UK’s 911.
You retard, don’t you get it? The phone is yellow. YELLOW.
*uncontrollable giggling*
Well played.
being better than me fail.
You retard, you can’t dial 999 if the buttons are 1,2,3.
Why not?
try entering that in on the phone
was this phone found outside of North America?
if so… ignorant people thinking 911 is the universal emergency number FAIL x infinity
dumbasses who live inside their own little box and think they know everything and deem everything that doesn’t make sense in their box as fail…. you are the true failures.
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! WE ARE the TRUE FAILURES! We the ones who can see the lack of the nine button on the phone are the dumb asses. I wish someone was around who could help me out of this box! There is no nine in my little box! Help me before I fail again!
I wonder in what kind of box asDF lives.
He appears to be standing penniless inside the free clues warehouse.
The kind of box where you come to failblog for a clue, obviously.
If that’s the case, asDF would appear to need a new box x infinity and beyond. Got’s the mind of a spaced cartoon.
Why does it have to be a box? And the lack of the “9″ is an obvious atempt t reducing the population of England. Maybe like a cleansing?
the irony is thick.
I love the self-righteousness found on the internet. Everybody feels so smug about being correct about something.
Way to go, asDF… look at the buttons. There’s no 9. Take a chill-pill.
It looks a little like a cutout. (Don’t say “PHHHHHHHOOOOTTTTTTTOOOOOSSSSHHHHHHOOOOOOOPPPEEEEDDDD” unless you explain why!)
In my phone experiences 1, 2 & 3 go across the top of the number pad. Can anyone tell the ignorant American if this is true other places also? Outside of my little box if you will?
notice the phone is made by “BT”
BT = British Telecom
American 911 = British 999
*head desk*
O.k. steth show me how to dial 999 from that phone? Please draw me a picture because I seem to fail at reading (or maybe that’s you?).
I can has quick, painless death?
How did you see the BT Logo and miss the absence of the nine button?
999-is like 911 in Great Britain. That would explain the BT at the lower left hand corner!!
Please see steth above maybe you can work together to buy me a clue.
hell, I’d settle for buying a vowel at this point….or the number nine.
fake
soooo fake
I don’t know the engineering details, but I do see in Google images an additional example of a BT phone with just the three buttons alongside a sign instructing users to dial “999.” Conjecture: those signs were affixed independently of the phones.
or you could just dial 321 reverse
Stupid Americans. Obviously 999 is the emergency number for the UK.
Umm… 999 is the emergency number in UK.
Your stupid is Stupid!!!!
Whatever! You idiots are all so egocentric, you don’t even realize that other countries might do things differently!
Blah blah blah, stoopid Americans…same old gripe! But CAN’T YOU SEE THAT THEY GOT THE NUMBER WRONG?? It’s supposed to be 911!!!
Idjits.
And you’re so fucking stoopid, you don’t realize the phone is missing a vital number with which to dial 999.
Well…I was going to blow you out the airlock, but I’m laughing too hard.
You’re Special-K.
Feeling healthy never looked this good!
JESUS CHRIST!!!!! There’s enough fails on this board for about a year!
lulz too.
dude! can we stop this “americans are stupid” bs, please! and all people from the us, don’t bash other cultures! geez, guys, this is seriously pathetic. BE NICE!!!!!!
In the uk, and many other parts of the world where English is spoken and understood by large numbers of the population, 999 is an official emergency number.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_call
Wow use if wikipedia to prove you are an idiot it’s so fail it’s a win! Please now use wikipedia to show me how to dial 999 on a phone with no 9 button. Thanks so much for your help!
Pshh. Sure thing.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dialing_999_without_a_nine_button
Why does everyone go on an on an on about the number 999, yes its the damn emergency number in the UK, but how does one dial 999 if there is no 9 to push?!
in the UK (you know, your ancestors…) you don’t dial 911 but 999 to get connected to the cops, firefighters, etc… so no fake, and NO FAIL… only FAIL are people saying it’s PHOT’ED.
did you read ANY of the previous posts???
PS- not everyone has ancestors from the UK, damn window licker….
Please oh wise ancestral one show me how to dial 999 on a phone that only has buttons 1, 2 & 3.
my ancestors aren’t from the UK. did u know there are people that actually live in other parts of the world other than the UK! must be shocking 4 u.
No… my ancestors would dial 110. (Well, they would if phones and direct dial had been around back when they were my ancestors.)
Umm, yeah… my ‘ancestors’ are Korean and German. And everyone always gripes about the U.S. not being knowledgeable when it comes to other countries (or groups of countries, as it were).
“Help fight crime, dial 999… is it 999 because it rhymes with crime?”
OK, if you’ve managed to read the million “Duh fail British 911 is 999 lol” posts and got this far, you deserve an explanation. The sign is clearly very old, and was obviously put there when there was a standard payphone there. However in some places in the UK such as near beaches or lakes, or outside police stations, these phones have been replaced with yellow emergency phones. These can not be used as normal phones but simply conenct through to emergency operators. There are meant to be labels next to each button such as “1 – Police; 2 – Ambulance; 3 – Fire”, but these have clearly worn away/peeled off. The fail is still valid, the sign should have been replaced when the phone was installed, but that doesn’t excuse the idiots above who posted comments without engaging their brain first.
<3 you
x2
So to summarize:
1. Soviet Russia Jokes Are Old
2. People around here are selectively blind/ retarded /too self-invloved to read the other comments, THUS leading to this ultimate cycle of frustration where every second commentor reiterates what has been said and countered effing 100 times -.-
3. The US eergency number 911 has a UK counterpart of 999
4. THE PHONE HAS NO EFFING ‘9′ BUTTON ON THE DISPLAY…. thus the basis for the fail theorem.
5. FailBlog has developed an internet version of road rage (web rage? forum rage? thread rage? plz to gief eyedeees fur propr nem)
6. Fail me somehow please
kthxbai
In soviet russia comment bitches about Mookie!
Why is this a fail? In the UK 999 is the US’ 911… fail@phonefail
SHIT. I failed. Took me way too long to figure out the fail…
… but only 60 seconds to figure out your own fail.
Maybe there’s hope for you.
I think there is potential hope
it’s because the phone only has “1″ “2″ and “3″ on it. so even if you were in england or whatever and needed to call emergency, you can’t, so haha fuck you lol etc.
so…fail!
999 is a real emergency number. england uses 999 like USA used 911. toooooooooooools.
me bores me
[insert paradox joke here]
We should just go back to the he has a mobius strip belt one, it fits this very well and well, the irony amuses me.
Gee it looks like you folks aren’t the shiniest apples in the teacher’s desk. It’s blazingly obviously that you pick up the phone and are directly connected to an emergency operator who asks you what service you require. You press either 1, 2, 3 depending on whether you need the police, fire department or ambulance. I feel glad having shed some light on this situation.
Now, Granny Smith, please enlighten me: What exactly does the sign above the telephone suppose me to do? Shout “999″ into the receiver?
Yes so the fail is that the directions tell you to do something completely different. Guess what that’s still a fail!
Its a common syndrome known as “Old Sign, New Phone.”
if that’s a new phone I’ll eat your sister’s panties.
In Soviet Russia, sister’s panties eats You!
Reading all these comments took a while, but was very entertaining! Yay for failblog and people who don’t read comments, and for the people who do and reply and make me lol …
I am only commenting to say that I noticed the fail on this silly phone, and the other Brits who leapt right in there to call out America fail where there wasn’t one are seriously letting the side down.
even Arsene Wenger saw it.
401st comment
I just came so hard. Someone call 999/911. kthxbai.
Oh my god, I am first again!
As has already been said, this IS the emergency number in the U.K. Wow, talk about irony and not just in an Alonis way:
FAIL BLOG FAIL
Please save yourselves some face and take this one down.
*sigh* So smart guy show me how to dial 999 on a phone with no nine? If you read enough to see that the U.K. emergency number being 999 had already mentioned how did you manage to miss the bit about no 9 on the phone?
I fail *had already *been* mentioned* doh!
Sunny, you’ve done a courageous job trying to correct the world of idiocy out there, but honestly…GET A LIFE, HON!
Please save yourself some face and take your comment down. Oh wait, this is impossible, right? Pity…
I can just imagine a situation…
“Argh! I’ve been bitten by a shark! Nobodies got a phone! Wait! There’s a phone! I’m saved! Now, all I need to is dial 99…oh sh*t”
ya got it all wrong.
just keep dialing 9; eventually, you’ll get somebody…
|the kid|
This is not a fail. in England that is the number you call for police.
this photo therefore would have been taken in england.
There are so many 9’s on this phone, Rob, which 9 button do you suggest that we push?
you have to hacve a 9 button to press to call 999.
obvious!
Or, you dial 112 instead. It’s the international emergency number and connects you to emergence services in all european countries.
Seen these phones before, before the text wore away the 3 options would have read something like
1) 999
2) Operator
3) Tourist Information
Weathering fail, I guess.
let me get this right….
there’s no 9 on that phone? how did i miss that? i’m so confused. does anyone know the number for 999?
The really sad thing about the comments (and the sign) is not the blatant idiocy of people not looking properly at the photo, but that no one realised that dialing 112 will also connect you with the emergency services.
It’s the europe wide version of 999/911
Idiocy + Ignorance – FAIL
Ok retard, reading through about 50% of these things, it seems that there should be labels on the phone describing what each of these buttons are supposed to do. 1 – Police, 2 – Your mother, 3 – Your grandmother or some such. Now, who fails? Either it’s these Brits who LIVE IN THAT COUNTRY or . . . you. Let me see, which shall I vote for?
Fail at REALLY reading previous comments . . . failure x infinity, etcetera.
Actually you’re the sixth person to say that 112 is the international emergency number.
SMARTASS COMMENT FAIL
Oi, you Yanks can kink your knickers! Your sodding 911 isn’t the bloody numbour to call when there’s a spot of bother about the queen’s kingdom! It’s courtesy in the commonwealth to engage 999 to get a bobby, govenour! Oi! Pitch a cricket on a lorry! Crumpet! Oi! England prevails! Wanker! Oi!
I’m not sure if this is irony or someone failing in a less-then-serious manner.
Sooo . . .I fail!
Way to confuse British slang with Aussie…Oi!!!
The comments on here are ASTOUNDING! So funny!
This is a clear fail post, until you decide to;
1. not pay attention and/or bother to read comments
2. try and over analyse things
It’s a proper lol FAIL…..WIN!
the fail is the fact that there is no nine on the phone.
most of you dont seem to realise that this is an emergency phone the its the fact tthat the sign is wrong i used one the other day when some cunt pulled a knife on me tbh the total fail is the lack of effort by the brittish police force and how shit they are
In the UK, 999 dials you
i’m here! guess it took yall that long to push 11111111111111111111111….
I officially declare this the most entertaining comment string on FailBlog. There exist as of this point 30 cases of stupid-ignorant-Americans-999-is-the-same-as-911 comments. Isn’t it ironic that the ones accusing others of ignorance are the ones who failed to realize the impossibility of dialing 999 on a phone with the numerals 1, 2, and 3; no-one even made the conjecture that the number 999 was incorrect.
They must not test for reading comprehension at We-Hate-America school.
Kudos to the ones who managed to figure out their own failure in a timely fashion and without outside assistance.
Besides, 999 only works for Brits. Americans should still dial 911, because that’s the correct number for emergencies, regardless of what country you’re in.
Also, there are enough comment fails on this page to fill burn of the week until the second coming of Christ.
You are all the problem in the world. Thus, I hate you all. And as I am referring to the mass of you idiots as a single entity, the singular use of problem is correct. So sit on it. Especially those of you who repeated 999 like useless parrots. I hope you fail your ways out of the gene pool as soon as can be arranged. That is all.
Well, aren’t you just the happy little camper!