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Cheezburger Network Blog
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Cheezburger Network Blog
first!
again, sorry about the first, but really, is there a fail here? looks like the passengers didn’t check out the quality of the cruise service before buying. looks like a you get what you pay for win.
i don’t think it’s reported in the cruise company brochure that “we may land on shore because our captain is blind”
That’s not what I thought they meant by “Rock Wall”
I was ON that boat during the whole trip. It was sold as a special deal for people with acute problems with seasickness. This was taken on the third day, but I slept through the afternoon program, so you won’t find me on the pic.
This is a model…
shhh!!
It’s not a model, it’s a failboat.
I said “scotch on the rocks”, not ” STOP on the rocks”!
lol. sorry, i couldn’t resist people.
hotlols
Indeed, people can be hard to resist.
Yeah, they taste just like chicken!
I have a feeling this will not get as many comments as “Wii fail”
Yeah, it won’t. D:
Well, then you haven’t seen the epic internet struggle between The Fresh Prince, who hails from Bel Air, and Vagabond, hailing from, well from wherever vagabonds come from. You haven’t seen it yet, because it hasn’t happened. But it’s going to happen, and when it finally does, it will generate more comments, more VICIOUS and homoerotic comments, than you could possibly imagine.
When this battle is concluded, you will see Vagabond the clear victor, and Fresh Prince trembling, whimpering, and drooling all over himself.
So, forge on, dear reader, and experience the thrill of a good old fashioned country ass-kicking…
its ok, no one could trust your judgement anyway when youre named after fresh prince of bel air
you wish you were half as fresh as me you old, smelly, dirty bag of shit you.
Im not old!
you wish you young you old, gray, used, ripe, archaic, long-lived, ancient, antique, hoary, old fart you.
thesaurus WIN!
You can’t call your own win, that’s like laughing at your own joke *shakes his head* socialization fail; go back to your cave.
Burn win.
Look who’s talking mr Hobo! At least he has a cave, you sleep in the motherhacking boxes!
Are you kidding? I only sleep in the finest dumpers of Paris! *turns up his noes and marches off, offended*
But seriously… those boxes are nice… T_T
Don’t forget to turn down your yesses. Yes’s? Yes’? Yessis?
They’ll no doubt turn up eventually, regardless.
Just like a dirty frog.
sans frog, sang-froid
… >< it took me a minute to get that, I thought I made a typo or something XD that was cleaver
Thanks! And this is paring knife. Oh, I’m just too much!
you two make half a sharp couple
(Comments won’t behest below this level)
That’s next week’s PBS show, Sara…”Plurals and Plurii”!
Turning up my yesses for that one!
you young you old?
contradiction fail? bad spelling fail? its something, im tired, cant think of which kind of fail. and not cool enough for a good rebuttle. i lose….
lol. my bad, forgot were in between you and young. Thanks for pointing that out, douchebag
you kids these days are so angry all that time. Its all that darned loud music….
nah, i think it’s that all you damned hippies made all good drugs illegal, how are we supposed to chillax when everything is so expensive and hard to find?
its not that all good drugs are illegal, its that now they are controlled by the government. they dont want you doing drugs unless they can tax it. hence the use of complicated crap instead of simple herbal remedies ( and i dont jsut mean pot ) but then people could get it free, we dont want that now do we??? haha
( granted this i a general observation adn doesnt apply to all medicines, but close enough… )
god, now im starting to sound like an old person. jesus. im
only 21! but then again, i do have arthritis…. hmmm.
arthritis? what are you? some gigantic, morbidly obese heart attack prone fat ass?
nah, slightly underweight actually. im a painter and did tattooing for a bit. . fucks up my hands tho.
underweight im afraid. but im a painter of 8 yrs and did tattooing and piercing for a while, so fucked up my hands already.
Had a few too many Junior Frosties.
You’re right on the money there *nods* though if marijuana were legal, the government could rake in a substantial amount of extra tax money a year. Plus, there would be some regulation for pot and people wouldn’t be as likely to get a tainted batch… Then again, that would mean the government has to take back all the bad things they said about pot when they tried to make everyone hate and fear it; no way that’s gonna happen.
Then again, we’re getting a little off topic, don’t you think? XD
yeah, but people could grow it themselves, hell they already do, so the government wouldnt be able to keep it under control. personal;ly i dont smoke or drink, but id rather have alcohol banned and make pot legal, makes more sense to me.
True. You can make your own beer though, candy too, and if you’re really good it’ll be quite a treat. But for the most part, the stuff you get in the store will be far, far superior to anything the average consumer can make themselves.
b3nd over and I’ll show you a treat.
FreshPrinceofFail, you’re a disciple of Gasman?
The government seems to have no problem contradicting itself in other matters why not this one too?
Stoned people may react slower,but drunk people react violently.
hippies wouldnt make drugs illegal. fyi
Crediting yourself with a win FAIL.
If he was a new, smelly, dirty bag of shit he would have been half as fresh as you?
Then again, the Fresh Prince of Bel Air came out in 1990, is it -really- that fresh anymore? >>
hey vagabond, go suck a penis for a dollar. that may buy you a beer.
I’m sorry bro, all the guys in my neighborhood are busy with your mom.
Hes right we are (&)
FYI, my mother died in ‘02. What old hag are you and your butt buddies busy with?
Necrophilia Win!
BURN!!!!
aha !!!
tsk tsk, the dead mother card? You live up to your name, because apparently I’m back in grade school. What’s next, gonna throw my back pack in the girl’s bathroom?
so getting picked on is your thing eh?
Only be people who feel the need to overcompensate for their severe lack of intelligence by “picking” on those they view as superior to them… are you one of those people, Mr BelAir?
only be? and you are talking about intelligence, or lack thereof?
One typo in how many posts? Now you’re just grasping at straws. How desperate are you going to get before you just give it up and walk away with the shreds of dignity you managed to cling to?
roflmao, Epic Flame.
What shreds? I don’t see any shreds.
Arguing on the internet is like running in the special Olympics, even if you win you’re still retarded.
…the shreds of dignity to which you managed to cling.
Can’t we all just get a…AAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!
*exits stage left with arms over head as stones, cows, garden tools and PBS shows are lobbed*
You forgot the cabbages.
chou chou shoo
*sigh*
Now I smell like stinky feet.
*heads to the shower*
It’s ok *pats shoulder* go was up.
HAHAHHAHA I meant to say “go wash up” *sigh* I am bad
at consoling ppl.
I thought go was down… like my noes.
Going….down?
i’ve heard, though, that cee cee’s good about going down people
that noes is cute, Sara
*Eskimo kiss*
Wait…I thought Cee Cee liked to be on top…!
Top or down I am good both ways.
But I might be retiring. My back and knees are just not as good as they use to be.
Well, if you’re top’s down, you might like to join Dragon– she’s “washing up” a storm in the shower, just a’singing and a’sighing,
I saw what you did they’re.
I can barely blee it myself.
Everything’s getting foggy.
Though now i remember I forgot to ask Cee Cee was her back broke mountin’.
she didnt have large hands and an adams apple did she? You may want to check for a penis as well, but I’m sure you’ve got that all man-handled.
I’m good, but thanks for the concern, I’m sure you learned that lesson the hard way.
not nearly as hard as when that she-male rammed you up the ass.
You should get some sleep, you’re starting to loose focus on reality again. That was a dream, remember? And it was me ramming -you-
Though i feel the need to ask you again to please stop including me in your fantasies. Honestly, it’s just not healthy.
hey vag, stfu! you’re the bitch in real life as well.
Resorting to violent l33t sp34k? Careful there, FreshPrinceOfBelAir, you might make a fool of yourself on the internet.
zomg! like that matters you worthless little twit. looking like a fool on the Internet would be the highlight of your life.
Only when it’s you, my friend. Me? I could care less.
But don’t let me stop you from making a complete ass of yourself in public *sits back to watch* go on…
you obviously can’t come up with a decent comeback you dim-witted inbred. no wonder you were picked on in school.
Oh, the humiliation! *throws his head back, dramatically* you have insulted my mind, truly the only aspect of myself that find pride in! Woe is me!
*shakes his head with a chuckle* Honestly, is that the best you have, you troglodyte? Did your thesaurus run out of words you could pronounce?
Or maybe your feeble little mind actually thinks you’re being sharp… Is that what you’ve done here? Do you think that by hurling your pathetic little insults at me, that you’re going to hurt me in some way?
*whistles and snaps his fingers* Wake up there, buddy. The
only person who you’re making look bad, is you. You were the instigator here, you went looking for an argument tonight, but there’s something you have to remember: arguing on the internet is like running in the
special Olympics, even if you win, you’re still retarded…
((Though I’d like everyone to know I have the utmost respect for the special Olympics and it’s participants. I was simply illustrating a point.))
hey alpha nerd. shut up.
Well at least he recognizes my superiority.
I understand you’re jealous, but it’s alright, I forgive you.
well, in that case I will forgive you for being jealous of my giant penis.
The Aug 6th 2008 “Artful and elegant pissing off” award goest to……
……
……
Vagabond!!!!
Thank you all for participating!
And the people rejoiced: yaaay…..
Look at me, I’m on the TV!!!1!11!11
@ Oripapa
*claps his hands together with an overjoyed smile* They
LIKE me! They -REALLY- LIKE me!!
omgomgomg *fans himself* I’d like to thank the academy!
And my agent — I love you Vince!!
*shakes his head with a laugh*
Seriously though, don’t worry yourselves, dear internet
prowlers, this is probably not going to be an frequent thing
for me. You know how the mood hits you sometimes *waves his hand* ah, you know
Enough with the ad hominem attacks, you both sound like my girlfriend.
That’s because you don’t support me enough! … and why does your mom hate me!? *cries*
…and i promised myself I wouldn’t _start_reading_the_comments! *sigh*
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FGIHT FHIGT HFIGT…..
thats not nice. im sure hed get more than just a beer…geez….
well, he would also get jizzed on. Vagabonds take that into account as well.
Seriously, though, I’m concerned about your overwhelming focus on deviant homosexual behavior. is there something you’d like to share with us? It’s okay to be yourself, FreshPrince, you’re with… well, i can’t say “friends” but at least we can’t physically hurt you… which you should find as a blessing.
b3nd over and i’ll show you a blessing.
Taking the gasman approach? Are you so desperate to chastise me that you’d stoop so low? You’re starting to slip… but watch your temper, if you loose it, there’s no going back.
ya, don’t worry, I won’t LOOSEN up.
dumbass.
… *blinks* okay, you might to have to explain that one to me…
Oh! I see, it’s because I said “if you loose it!”
You think I made a typo and you’re trying to call me out on it;
aww that’s so cute! Keep up the sharp eye and maybe you’ll grow up to be a BIG troll some day!
… but in the mean time, try reading a book. You might surprise even yourself…
speaking of surprised, you looked pretty surprised when I rammed you up the ass. You must have never felt something so large between your cheeks (or legs) before.
I know it must be frustrating when no woman on earth will touch your repulsive, misshapen body, but just because you can’t -get- any sex with girls, doesn’t mean you’re gay… just a loser.
But I’m confident that with a good 12 step program you can kick those fantasies that plague you and return to being your usual self again… not that you’ll get any sex then either… But you’ll -feel- better, and maybe you won’t be such an
incorrigible ass.
Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize it was past your bed time, how rude of me *waves goodbye* remember, you can break the cycle! *gives thumbs up with a big phony grin* … *rolls his eyes*
I’m sure you would love it if i gave up, well too bad.
I’m the Fresh Prince Of Bel Air bitch. i get more poon in a day than you can imagine in your life time.
ive counted at least 8 blatantly homosexual references so far … any reason for it? or jsut need to show your insecurity to everyone? whats wrong, cant afford that big truck? or the big pitbull? or a sweet ass barbwired armband tattooo to show everyone how manly you are? ( also as you seem so interested in anal sex , your obsession would only make sense in two ways, either you are gay, which is perfectly cool, or you have a small penis and cant handle the real thing. )
Now now, as much as I’d love to psychoanalyze him, lets not talk about him while he’s too embarrassed to defend himself.
*nods* Come now, we’re better than that.
haha, if you call it defending himself. i can almost garaunteee it would be something along the lines of ” bend over ill show you come now”
thankfully i can almost justify my continuing this lame bickering by the fact that im at work all night and not wasting my free time
( yay for getting paid to screw around online all night)
i can bet his method of self defense would include ” bend over and ill show you come now! ” so fuck em
my only justification i have for all this is that im at work all night and wasting time i get paid for, and not my free time…. haha
And it goes on…. oh joy!
again, yaaay….
Look at me, I’m on TV again!!!1111!!!!1
What the hell, must be BelAir’s day off or something. It’s a nice day outside, put down the keyboard and play outside! It’ll make you feel better.
…and I’m still reading… because?…
becauseeee you don’t wanna feel left out… just like when your family didn’t take you to florida.. and you were left all alone…and those two robbers tried to get into your house…
KEVIN!!!!!
impersonation is only the sincerest form of flattery when you don’t ruin a good name. well, it’s not really a good name, but i’m sure he’s not very happy about it.
SHH lets keep watching, and pass the popcorn.
Oh I get it, both of you are trying to get the ” Burn of the week ”
Right? You are doing it wrong, you should not just take a bite of
your oponent, you have to twist the neck and make sure he
doesnt get up. I mean, mom reversals? thats unoriginal. And
using the other guy’s name isnt gonna work either. Come on! you
have to be original and make a point, its not that hard.
Oh, and a thread like this is also a stupid place to start a dumb
argument. Kind of like this one.
Oh yeah! And the boat failed. The tide went down while the ship
was idle and left it there. That was the fail. Not as hard as
both of you, but still a fail..
Actually I just found him annoying. I couldn’t give less of a crap about “burn of the week”
Oh look everyone, he’s baaaaaack *rolls his eyes again and sits back*
Here, this may help…I stocked up. Just click on my name.
RickTrolled again
*lobs a cabbage at fuzz*
un chou chou pour mon chou chou
Hey a cabbage patch kid…..I use to love these things.
Until they grew up and killed my whole family. O.O
dude. you got problems.
it’s a link to a .jpg picture. as far as i know, you can’t have sound in a .jpg file.
ok, so apprently i fucked that up… oh well… i fail. maybe i should learn to drive boats….
Ahoy matey. Land ahead. Around.
Land HO~SHIT!
It’s Speed 2!
stupid cruise..
Comment fail! 90 percent of comments are too douchy to read.
Correct, I’m the other 23%.
Math win.
Research has shown that 70% of all statistics are made up 30% of the time.
All kidding aside, it’s possible that there was abnormally high tide followed by an abnormally quick low tide, resulting in the cruise ship being stranded on a sandbar. While still a fail, it’s an explination as to how something like this could have occured.
sorry, vagabond is being stupid.
What is your problem? Please troll somewhere else.
Agreed!
Plz to not be feedn da trollz pplz!
*heavy sigh* I can’t help it, they get so adorable when they’re all frenzied!
It’s like stirring up an ant hill and watching them go crazy. They -think- they’re going to accomplish something, but really they’re just swarming around pointlessly ><
im afraid im on here since im at work all nite with no actual work to do, great being paid for this, but still kinda feel lame being online all nite…
quit trying to justify your loserishness.
Oh but give it a read, I found it quite amusing. Come, watch as the troll beaches himself like the very failboat we came to discuss.
well, I’m gonna go to sleep now, I hope someone else can take over for me and troll that vagabond called Vagabond.
6 hours later and no one has come to your rescue. I think that means we don’t like you.
whe i first saw “140 comments” on this failBOAT i thought:
“Oh, wow.. my lovely fail-family must have something interesting to say”.. instead.. i found out that Will Smith’s crappy clon over-here started the most annoying discussion ever..and the worst idea too, specially if you don’t have the weapons to win it.
so sorry for you Fresh Prince..
But you, are a Failure.
*hugs b.p.*
We’re still here!
Yay!
everytime i read “dragowriter” i think of FireStarter..
But…I didn’t write that one.
:p
everytime i TRY to write DRAGONWRITER i get dragowriter
stupid fingers
dragonmwiter
that’s what i got
I can’t quite make out the logo on the ship. Anyone know where that’s from?
Well the http://www.cruisewest.com is a bit of a giveaway ;o)
*blinks and looks again* …. ah! keen eye. Thank you
No worries, too much left handed browsing?
*Decides to back away before he falls into the Bel End *cough* Air trap.*
Right handed browsing, actually *smirks* but enough about me >>
No Seriously your left handed? I’m so sorry for you…
PBS PEOPLE!! PBS!!!
*sobs on RogueThree’s shoulder*
i’m starting to believe that the PBS you keep referring to isn’t the children’s tv network.
What is this PBS of which you speak. I a poor uneducated fellow from England know nothing of these Yankee instigated epitomes of free speech.
Doth this PBS stand for the Public Broadcasting Service? What raptious joy it must be for thou to be able to wax long on the subject of thy hearts desire. The internet is such a poor cousin of that noble service.
Or could thou mean that worthy institution the Poetry Book Society, which seeks to ensure those morsels of noble prose that, once uttered, should be safegaurded for eternity.
Ah, finally, illumination! My loyal and trusy companion (aka google) has discovered the truth of your noble intent. You seek to bring us all back to the greater light, that which is unknowable yet knowest all. I of course refer to the Prayer Book Society which doth seek to safegaurd the noble traditions of the common prayer book.
Oh yeah and Hi and stuff.
Definately some burns here… Need some aloe for that Princey?
I feel Sick. I think I ate too much. YAY!
I have discounted tickets for a great cruise for people prone to being seasick…
haha I actually had to think about that for a second.. sorry not with it today
Oh man, will you believe that I was ON THAT CRUISE when it ran aground like that? We had to tie our bedsheets together and toss them over the side so that we could all slide down to relative safety! We lost 3 people to the mud, though.
Don’t worry! Shaggy, Scooby, and the rest of the gang stopped those evil Caribbean Mud Monsters… it is now safe to re-board the fail boat.
LOL, Mudcrabs, I say. Oblivion anyone?
What about the Pirates of the Caribbean crabs? March, you crabs! March! We should reach the ocean by winter!
Remember to flip them over for massive damage.
Geeky RPG reference WIN!!!!!
*runs to the ‘puter to close a few more Oblivion Gates*
Have you heard about the hero of Kevash?
i think we should invite these 2 on Dr. Phil
maybe we should leave them alone to hug it out
Hello Mr. Pot. Another day in your sad life? You are welcomed here.
“Captain, I regret to inform you that we may have ignored a crucial element of our plan to leave the area…”
“What is that?”
“The tide, sir.”
AHHH HA AH HA AH AHA HA AH
i gets it
We need to stop them, they’re like Vegeta and… Whoever Vegeta fights. They’ll just keep shooting lazors at each other until their battle leaves failblog in ruins.
It can’t take that much energy! This blog will explode in FIVE MINUTES!!!!
Don’t you mean like 500 episodes?
That’s just to charge up, there will be a few more for the actual attacking.
We ain’t found shit!
I TOLD YOU TO COMB THE DESERT!
It’s a Culkin cruise!
Arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics. Even if you win, you’re still retarded.
hahaha..this comment=win
*blink blink* are you serious? Did no one actually stop to read that unnecessarily long post I made? At least read the last few lines before the parentheses -_- *points up*
actually i read it on there somewhere before the post that you are talking about.. not sure if it was you though
Yes, someone else posted it in a comment tree higher than mine, but always check the time stamps
Failboat goes Home… Sigh…
Aw look, little Fail-lifeboat is stranded too! How cute.
No, no. What we’re witnessing is one of the miracles of nature. Mother cruise ships often beach themselves to give birth to their young. This little fellow is saying his last goodbyes before he goes shuffling off into the ocean, evermindful of the constant threat from seagull pirates. Its beautiful really.
They say nobody has ever seen them mating, and lived to tell the tale. Arr.
There’s not enough life boats! What ever shall we do!? ……… *walks* >>
There are a little over 100 comments at the time of this post…and it looks like at least 50% were posted by the same two people. Wow…
I think someone was trying to get burn of the week and epic failed.
Indeed.
>> isn’t it kind of redundant to link to the blog you’re posting in?
FPoBA is a piece of crap with feet.
be gone
Failboat cruises will be leaving as soon as we get a high tide, actually a king tide, a strong on-shore wind, heavy rain, and a tsunami.
But when the tide is high, it gets the munchies…
Thanks, Dragonwriter. Now I’ve got that stupid old Blondie song going through my head. *Smacks himself repeatedly on the forehead while muttering “Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!” Coworkers look at him strangely*
I always aim to please!
Erm…I’ll aim better next time. :p
Failboat strikes again! XD
More Failboat plz.
Trying your best to get mentioned in “burn of the week” FAIL
Once again, *points to self* don’t give a crap about burn of the week. Take the 5 minutes to actually -read- the conversation -_- Just because someone posts a lot in one thread, and all of them are aimed at humiliating some pathetic tollomite, doesn’t mean they’re reaching for burn of the week…
… sometimes we’re just ass holes *shrugs*
actually, you were justified in telling him off.
lol it’s a toy ship newbs.
FAIL!
It is a small cruise ship, I got the picture from the newspaper, it was Alsaka I think.
with a toy lifeboat and toy living people on it
and toy waves moving around
and a toy cruise website address
and toy details that would make this a multi-grand toy for only the richest of yachtsman-wannabes.
And toy newbs on it that are waiting for you, because you left your glasses at home
aaaaanon i do believe you’re toying with us now
Clearly the ocean failed here, not the boat. The ocean failed to be higher.
Well at least they made the beach party…
It’s the boat formerly known as the Spirit of Nantucket, that was intentionally run aground in 2007, after hitting a submerged object in Viriginia. As the Spirit of Glacier Bay, it run aground accidentally in Alaska.
I thought it was the Freewinds, the Scientology boat with the blue asbestos.
IS THAT`PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 3 STUFF?
Is that the boat of “Madagascar” movie???
aah noo ahh noo
im beached is brew.
Ahahaha the boat is going backwards into the shore
I am dead serious i was just about to submit this same picture.
I like how they’ve deployed the lifeboat. Water recognition fail.
tide fail!
neptune win
No its not, Cant you see the people?
Looks like a miniature model…
dude, this is totally failing XD
this pic is a fail…. u can tell that the boat is fake… there is a hair tie right next to the boat