Kosher Fail
Submitted By Ellen L.
Photo by NancyKay Shapiro
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Sanjay fails
Bhatti boy
first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first
Not first fail
jews wouldnt pay that much how silly
counting fail -.-
i found out how to change my avatar well my gay partner did but thats just because he was on top
There goes your trip to Israel.
FIRST!
not quite…
First looser…
Spelling fail therefore insult fail.
win
teehee
Mexican fail
no that’s how you spell it many different ways to spell it
Then tighter
bend over and i’ll show you looser.
You failed.
‘Reply to this Comment’ fail.
dub the name captain obvious LOL
!כשל
Koshel?
chashal
http://www.milon.co.il/general/general.php?term=%D7%9B%D7%A9%D7%9C
heh.. cool.. so would it be “!כשר כשל” ?
yep.
The adjective goes /after/ the noun.
No. You may not deprive lolspeak of its raw grammatic atrocity. That is its essence. Conjugation, sentence structure, and correct spelling are alien to lulz, as the intertubes intended.
Hebrew comeback win.
I wish my keyboard had keys that type in hebrew. That would be so awesome.
and now treats for your little ones! pig’s feet! great for passover!
Oy vey!
ja.
feh!
more of an oy gevalt.
Holy hell.
That’s worse than those marketing idiots at McDonald’s who put the bacon, sausage, or ham on a BAGEL. Oy gevalt.
Bagel sandwiches are great. Well, not at McDonald’s, but at real food establishments…
Also, I could have sworn Fail Blog did this months ago. I know I’ve seen it around.
The steak bagels were awesome. too bad they discontinued them.
They did that because the steak bagels included so much cholesterol they discontinued your heartbeat.
gumby
“They did that because the steak bagels included so much cholesterol they discontinued your heartbeat.”
Style win…..
Yeah, but I don’t even think the bagels are Kosher at McDonalds. Anyway, the REAL crime is the spongy, flourescent substance they attempt to pass off as ‘eggs’. Nothing destroys a breakfast sandwich like spongy-eggs.
When I worked at McD’s around 1990, they were in fact real eggs.
Yes but that was when they had money to buy real eggs. Now they spend it all on their chicken nuggets….”Now with REAL white meat!”
Because black meat wasn’t good enough for them? Racists!*
*Do not take this comment seriously.
Public service announcement. If you want real eggs at McDonald’s.. TOUGH CRAP….just kidding, when you order your eggy breakfest, request round eggs. That’s the only kind of eggs they have that come from a shell. everything else comes from a milk carton which I find slightly disturbing (Not as bad as the ‘egg product’ in Clerks 2 mind you)
The so-called “real white meat” is so misleading. I tried a chicken mcnugget again for the first time in many years when they first advertised it… and it tasted exactly the same as I remember, had the same texture…. but was whiter inside. Eeeyugh… still recombined. >_<
Maybe its made from kosher pigs who separate their slop onto two sets of dishes.
Own’t
Since I stink. I’m going to show myself FIRST!
Oh yeah, great for Chanukah… if you’re a Christian and don’t even celebrate it… or you’re a very lax Jew.
What – they have “messianic” groceries now?
“On sale for Channukah at Quality Treif…”
jews don’t eat ham? why not?
cultural awareness fail
Reminds me of an associate who saw something mentioning Channukah and when reading the sign pronounced it phonetically. When it was pointed out that Channukah was in fact the commonly known holiday he responded with “Cha nook ah is part of Hannukah”
religious vestige failure.
allergies.
Perfect!!!
Win
You have heard of a SEARCH ENGINE, right?
this is how the internet works
1. google
2. wikipedia
3. dictionary
…
98843874. ask on a public message board
What’s a public message board?
It’s a big truck.
Is it Ted Steven’s truck?
Nah, Ted travels via a public transport system consisting of trains running through an array of hollow round underground tunnels. I believe he alluded to a group of cylindrical tunnels in a speech once.
Intertubes?
i don’t think i have google installed on this computer
i went to the library, but they don’t have wikipedia, just “encyclopedia”, would this work?
do they sell dictionaries at the library maybe?
The library is more like a book rental service, rather than a regular store.
Okay. Now I know you’re joking. But on the off chance you aren’t…
Google doesn’t require downloading. It’s browser-based.
Wikipedia is a website.
Libraries don’t sell books, they rent them.
If this is incorrect wherever you are, I apologize, but libraries LOAN books (I’ve seen one that rented out new releases but it was the exception not the rule)
libraries sell their old books which are falling apart for vitually nothing … i bought three the other day
sarcasm fail!
pedanticism fail
I like you.
Because ham is made from pig, and it is against the Jewish and Muslim religions to eat pig or indeed to have any contact with any pig product. (Back when footballs were really made of pigskin, Jewish kids never played football.)
snark fail
Red Sea Pedestrians STILL don’t play football. They’re too mousy and fragile.
They should try pork; it’s GREAT!
I eat ham, but that’s because I’m a Pork Eating Crusader.
Goldberg
Cuz the color clashes with the shrimp cocktail.
I think David might’ve bumped his head while fighting off a giant. Those slingshots can come back to bite you.
You’re not suppose to eat anything from an animal that does not chew it’s cud and have a cloven hoof. Pigs have a cloven hoof but don’t chew their cud. Rabbits chew cud but don’t have cloven hooves. Therefore both are treyf (unclean). You also can only eat fish with scales (no bottom feeders which tend to be scaleless) – no predators, no shellfish.
Finally the animal the meat comes from has to be very healthy. No animals with tumors, illnesses, or injuries. The animal has to be killed swiftly with little pain – a very sharp knife drawn swiftly across the throat – and all the blood drained from the body. Plus no organ meats. Actually, in these days of things like ecolli and the poisonous foods from China (along with other goods) everyone is better off eating kosher. It is the CLEANEST food there is. And it tastes a LOT better.
Thank you Jami and BAW for leaving actual REAL comments about why this post is a TRUE FAIL.
For all the others who said that it wasn’t, how would you appreciate known child molesters being Santa or the Easter Bunny in the very mall you take your child to? Those are sacred icons to Christian faith and that idea sullys them just as saying not keeping Kosher is “not important” does. It is NOT alright to say that something so intrinsic to a peoples’ faith is nothing sacred.
Er… Santa and the Easter Bunny are products of a commercial world that stemmed from the nationalising, and eventually internationalising, of both Christmas and Easter. In terms of their significance to Christianity… they hold none. The focus of both holidays is Jesus and his birth/death/resurrection. Santa and the Easter Bunny are in no way sacred, only to major companies wishing to financially leech off the holidays.
Actually, the Easter bunny is stolen from Pagan religions as is most symbolism around “Christian” religions. Easter itself is actually taken from a pagan holidy called Ostara that celebrates fertility, and nothing says fertility like a rabbit. Santa is actually based on a real person, who was a dutch saint who’s actual name was Sinter Klaus which got mispronounced by Americans and eventually became Santa Claus. So, BEFORE you go saying things are just a product of commercialism, try looking into their origins first.
Yes, but their significance is not due to any sacredness on their part to Christianity, but as a result of commercial interest. It’s not their origins that matter, but their reasons for being well known.
father christmas is based upon the story of saint Nicholas who once dropped some coins down the chimmeny of a poor family where they landed in some socks ehich had been left hanging from the mantlepiece to dry… not this Sinter Klaus person.
Sinter Klaus and Saint Nicholas = same person.
Actually, the Easter Bunny was stolen by me last night! And if you don’t meet my demands, I’ll mail you one of his ears in a box (along with a plastic egg with candy) to show I mean business. I’ll have to get back with you on a demands list, as I haven’t actually thought of any yet. And, do you happen to know what bunnies eat? He’s looking a little thin. Don’t want to starve the hostage to death. I’ve tried bacon, but he hasn’t eaten any yet; must be a Jewish bunny (who would have guessed?). And, he keeps chewing off his blindfold. Any helpful suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
I’ve never read it and I try very hard not to associate myself with people of ANY faith, but I don’t recall hearing of Christians speaking of Santa or the Easter Bunny being in the Bible. How exactly are they “sacred icons”?
It’s nothing sacred.
fyi: neither santa nor the easter bunny are “sacred icons to the Christian faith”.
sorry, it’s not sacred.
I don’t take my child to the mall to see Santa; I take her to the local prison.
Christianity fail
Chicken, turkey, goose? Tis ok, yes?
Turducken?
Did someone say Turducken?
Score for Turducken!
Just because it kosher, don’t mean it’s clean.
I work in a jewish establishment and if anything their kitchens are dirtier.
Yes it is very orthodox and no I’m not jewish.
Separating your meat and dairy doesn’t make mold any better for you.
That is the fault of your particular establishment and is in violation of health codes. Ideally there should be no mold in any restaurant but if mold does happen the moldy products should be discarded immediately along with anything nearby that the mold could have spread too (like if one finds a moldy orange in a crate of oranges then all other oranges touching the moldy one should be removed.) That is why the health inspectors ask that you survey your inventory of fruits/veggies/meats at least once a week, fish twice a week, dairy every other week. Kosher just dictates food prep/cooking restrictions and what type of foods they can bring in. I agree that Kosher doesn’t necessarily mean clean but there are many mainstream establishments that are filthy and have mold in their kitchens too. To think that only kosher establishments suffer from this problem is a fail in logic.
what’s cud
Although there is quite a controversy about the painlessness (I suppose that word doesn’t exist) of the killing…
Baruch ata adonai, elohaynu melech haolam, hamotzi lechemin ha’aretz. Amen. No squid, no cheeseburgers, no bacon, but we’re healthy! GO KOSHER FOOD!!
And his name is David?
Actually there are a growing number of liberal Jews who eat ham all the time. Kosher is becoming something mostly observed by the more conservative/traditonalistic Jewish groups.
Well, at least in the US. I don’t know about what the Jewish communities are like in other countries.
Yeah, I can see Jews coming around to eat pork here and there, but to pay 8.99 a pound for it???????? Come on!!
By the way, that looks suspiciously like Whole Foods signage.
meshugena kov!
Does that company also make angus burgers for Indian parties?
I believe a beef burger would be more appropriate in terms of… inappropriateness.
Um, Angus is a kind of beef.
I think they manufacture anus burgers.
Hey, there are plenty of non-observant and (I guess) minimally-observant Jews who eat pork and also celebrate, albeit in a very superficial way, Chanukah.
I think even the most non-religous Jew would not eat pork while they are celebrating Chanukah.
Nope, my stepmother (who is a non-observant Jew) eats pork products, even on Hanukkah (both spellings are correct btw.) In her own intentionally contradictory words “I make a mean Kosher ham.”
BTW, $8.99/lbs for boneless spiral ham is not that great a price, even during holidays.
hilarious.. . . ever religion/faith gets watered down through time?, ,, just like being on your job. . you observe rules and regulations at first, then after you been there awhile, you like screw it, whats the harm . .you kinda do what you want to do as well as the others there and it moderately becomes common and acceptable not to obey the rules. . and if nobody say something or calls you on it you will get more radical and self righteous .. . and once some do call you on it, you get offenisve and have a attitude or more self righteous. .
Or maybe people are just slowly figuring out that their religion doesn’t totally make sense to them.
Thinking for yourself win.
religion should have one rule and only one rule, hats optional.
No, hats should be mandatory – one man, one hat – just the way nature intended.
You swing both ways? Hat or no hat?
Deviant.
awesome
My whole family hurts:(
chaka kahn, chaka kahn
Stargate comment WIN!
I’d like to see the bone-in spiral ham.
religions that tell you not to eat certain things… EPIC FAIL
I’ll eat what the hell i want to thanks!
so do you feel like eating male platypus ganished with hemlock?
Mm…. perhaps Platypus eggs would be nicer?
dick
How about you sponge off. ignorant putz.
Mazel tov – have a bacon cheeseburger.
For the record, Judaism does not have anything to say on the dietary habits of gentiles – except of course to ask that if you’re going to eat an animal, you kill it first. But then, that’s a position that the (presumably secular) living animal would probably side with as well.
Then again, if you want to try to wrangle a steak off a live bull, please do try to film the event for posterity.
Respect for other peoples religions Mega epic fail.
Just because they don’t believe what you do doesn’t make them deserving of your disrespect.
For example, I think 90% of what christians believe is utter crap, yet I have nothing against most christians (The christians who want to recruit everyone else into their religion are an exception. Those bastards are ANNOYING)
Hypocrisy WIN – chastising someone else for not respecting other people’s religion while disrespecting christians (utter crap, bastards, annoying) while disrespecting someone else’s lack of respect for religion. Blowhard.
most religions do. i think rules on food are pretty low on the worst things people read into their religions.
All have their own path. You choose to cross paths or not.
This is one of those “Not familiar with the Concept” failures.
One may disagree with other’s beliefs, but to be so completely ignorant is painfully sad. The only options are to cry or to laugh. What may be even sadder – and in this case more laughable – are those who are so ignorant and unaware of their ignorance.
One hopes the store manager had a gentle but educational talk with the perpetrator of that sign.
“What may be even sadder – and in this case more laughable – are those who are so ignorant and unaware of their ignorance.
One hopes the store manager had a gentle but educational talk with the perpetrator of that sign.”
Especially since that appeared in a New York City deli. (My friend took that picture.) And yes, it was removed and I’m sure the appropriateness of this was mentioned to the staff involved.
זה לא כשר
ו-fail זה כשלון יותר מכשל (failure)
אבל אין מילא בעברית במתאימה לאיך שמשתמשים ב-fail
נראה מגעיל דרך אגב…
nice one, yirov!(My hebrew may be rusty. I wish my keyboard could type in hebrew)
LAME. I sent this in months ago.
I know soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo lameeeeeee!!!!
I enjoy ham for Channukah as well as for Christmas…why you may ask/or not?
Because JESUS MADE ME KOSHER. It is not what goes into a man that defiles him is it what comes out.
Win, happyjew. Pure win.
DUDE! What’s wrong with THAT?!
I see nothing indicating a failure here!!!
hey Jesus killed the Jews.
what’s spiral ham?
what’s chanukah?
i don’t get it…
Me either…
You wouldn’t
Christianity FAIL – Pork is banned in the Bible too:
Leviticus 11:7-8
Deuteronomy 14:8
Nice try, moron. Leviticus, Deuteronomy= OLD TESTAMENT
Christianity is based on the NEW TESTAMENT or NEW COVENANT
You obviously have no need whatsoever of the Bible you looked those verses up in.
“Christianity is based on the NEW TESTAMENT”
right, because they didn’t get it right on the first try, so they had to rewrite it
Christianity is based on BOTH Testaments. In 382, the Council of Rome set the Canon of the Bible, listing the accepted books of both the Old and New Testaments. Leviticus and Deuteronomy are both in this list.
p.s. I have no need of the Bible whatsoever except to understand Christian scripture. I’m Buddhist.
first, next is gay!
Kashrut fail!
I will henceforth call myself Kosher Ham in tribute to this epic fail.
don’t Jewish people like ham for Christmas?
maybe not….
LMAO
he’s spelling “over” incorrectly to get around a filter specifically designed to prevent his comments… accusation FAIL
How about we just don’t post any comments at all… he’d have nothing for which to butt rape us.
“…for which to…” grammar cop LOL