Comments on: Breathalyzer Fail

By: Scrotabuloid

Scrotabuloid — Sat, 13 Mar 2010 00:22:17 +0000

Damn, apparently a diet of underwear saturated with ball-sweat ages you terribly.

By: Boomoose

Boomoose — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 04:59:27 +0000

nom nom??

By: Fiona

Fiona — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 05:36:45 +0000

This whole thing seems a bit suspect, imo. Even if it’s the wrong picture, there’s no way an 18-year old is going to get off on all charges with BAC of 0.08%. In most states if you’re under 21 it’s illegal to have more than 0.02% BAC.

By: Jax

Jax — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 06:57:25 +0000

Seriously, definitely not 18. Double fail.

By: Izzy

Izzy — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 20:52:25 +0000

…”ripped the crotch out of his shorts and stuffed it into his mouth”? Geez. Does the side not work as well, or something?

By: MSpears

MSpears — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 14:36:51 +0000

LOL! Fortunately, no. They did try a lot of other ways of beating the breathalyzer test… eating your underwear wasn’t one of them. None of the methods they tried worked, either.

By: MyChemicalApocalypse

MyChemicalApocalypse — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 04:35:44 +0000

why underwear? other things have cotton. like shirts. how about a piece of shirt. but underwear’s just weird.

By: Jeremiah

Jeremiah — Thu, 28 May 2009 19:31:49 +0000

Yeah but then it would read An 48 year old…. and that’s just really terrible english…I’m guessing it’s a picture of someone else in the story, the Constable or something…

By: matt

matt — Wed, 20 May 2009 13:52:11 +0000

eating a cigarette works, i did it and passed after 14 cans of carlesberg.

and he is not 18

By: Ash

Ash — Wed, 06 May 2009 03:29:43 +0000

I’m pretty sure no one would eat their underwear without being drunk, so what’s the point of the test anyway?

By: slavemaster

slavemaster — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 01:18:28 +0000

You’re telling me that the people on Mythbusters got loaded, then ate dick straps and checked their BAC? I have to start watching that show.

By: smt

smt — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 15:37:26 +0000

It looks like it should read “48″ I think the left side of the “4″ didn’t print dark enough (as sometimes happens in the papers) to be captured by the camera.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 02:54:48 +0000

dang i saw that article and i was gonna post it. not. but i did see the article before

By: melissa

melissa — Sat, 14 Mar 2009 15:19:27 +0000

Thats a double fail, notice that it says 18 year old, and the man looks to be at least 45

By: Kat

Kat — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 03:10:51 +0000

lul I think the fact that he ate undies is dwarfed by the fact that that guy is only 18…wtf

By: UrMomMz

UrMomMz — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 04:46:47 +0000

Typing skills=FAIL. 81 is the actual age.

By: Calculate900

Calculate900 — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 21:59:42 +0000

in soviet russia, underwear eats YOU

By: hanley

hanley — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 02:29:50 +0000

that was a total win. He got off!

By: amberto

amberto — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 23:21:57 +0000

OMG! YAAAAAA… STETTLER REPRESENTIN!! wooot… (should I be embarrassed that i’m from that town now?? oh wait, i already am.. hahahaha)

By: Mike

Mike — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 19:42:53 +0000

18 looking like 34…FAIL.

By: farrex

farrex — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 03:11:40 +0000

No its because everytime u eat underwear the underwear will give u as a gift 25 years.

By: Running Waters

Running Waters — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 01:50:08 +0000

They’re citing Constable Peter McFarlane for a quote that’s out of frame. The author is listed at the beginning of the article, where it says “by DARCY RICKARD”.

By: Pete

Pete — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 10:31:33 +0000

You guys all fail. xD The guy in the picture is the officer who committed the guy. XD At least I”m pretty sure because the guy’s name is in bold above the picture.

By: Tay-Tay

Tay-Tay — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 15:18:03 +0000

Because he doesn’t..?

By: Tay-Tay

Tay-Tay — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 15:17:34 +0000

That’s not an 18-year-old.

By: E

Tue, 14 Oct 2008 07:09:05 +0000

No way! This is clearly a win. Just look at that look on his face. He’s thinkung “Yeah, I beat you pigs, what. . . What!?!”

By: Mus

Mus — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 08:50:03 +0000

Must have been super tasty. Who ever thought of that. Lolz

By: Toph

Toph — Mon, 08 Sep 2008 04:24:36 +0000

How has noone picked up that this looks like Rainn Wilson (Dwight) from The Office?

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 10:33:49 +0000

Mythbuster comments above:
June 9th, 2008 at 10:27 am
June 9th, 2008 at 4:47 pm

Random Remarks: June 9th, 2008 at 4:43 am

so its your FAIL in knowing time circulation..

By: PeaceSignIndexDown(:

PeaceSignIndexDown(: — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 09:05:52 +0000

Wow i wonder how it tasted.
xP

By: Tara

Tara — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 05:41:12 +0000

that dude is SO not 18.
i’m 18. i know what 18-year olds look like heh
that guy is like 40

By: acerious

acerious — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 05:32:41 +0000

Check author.

Peter McFarlane

Peter Griffin -> Seth McFarlane

what’s the relation here?

By: win

win — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 18:14:20 +0000

this is win.. it worked he was gonna blow a .09

By: Anonymomma.

Anonymomma. — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 00:46:57 +0000

oh my goodness – he is not 18! wtf he looks like he’s 45

By: Lupus

Lupus — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 09:12:27 +0000

The testimony broke up people? (3rd para)

By: madcow

madcow — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:13:27 +0000

Hygeine fail!

By: ninjalo

ninjalo — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 22:38:27 +0000

this is a win
he’s 18 and didnt get anycharges for driving drunk or m.i.p
and he watched too many simpsons cartoons a win for sure he beat the system

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 09:00:25 +0000

Reading previous comments: FAIL.

By: stine

stine — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 06:23:35 +0000

When I was a police officer, I arrested a guy who was chewing on a condom because he thought the latex smell would mask the alcohol smell. It didn’t work for him.

By: melanie,16

melanie,16 — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 04:44:13 +0000

dumb white people.

hahaa.
jk jk

By: Kyle

Kyle — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 04:48:22 +0000

Actually, the news article predates even that.
I saw it in a book printed in 1992, so it’s gotta be even older than that.
I bet the policemen were laughing their asses off though. How stupid can you get?

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 20:55:31 +0000

Fail? Didn’t it actually work though?

By: crunchy

crunchy — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 11:14:37 +0000

what? 18 my ass

…43 at the least

By: zach Whitaker

zach Whitaker — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 06:08:18 +0000

people age really fast in the onion. he was acquitted, meaning unless he called the newspaper the story couldn’t be published.

By: e

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:59:53 +0000

Why create a fake ID and then put a picture on it of someone who’s clearly underage? You’d want the picture to look enough like you that the clerk wouldn’t do a doubletake, but the clerks I’ve seen usually pay much more attention to the ID than the bearer, so I’d want the pic on the ID to look “mature.” Maybe use an older cousin or brother’s pic.

In any event, as has been pointed out, the drinking age where he lives is apparently 18, so there’d really be no need for a fake ID anyway. I would be more inclined to suspect a medical condition that causes premature aging (Werner’s syndrome, for instance) or a simple mix-up in typesetting/layout of photos. My local newspaper is famous for mixing up pictures so that the picture on page one actually belongs to the story on page 3, and vice versa.

By: kwaping

kwaping — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 15:53:27 +0000

I can’t believe nobody commented on the fact that the courtroom just happened to have visiting school kids on that day. Double-extra fail.

By: Dark

Dark — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 13:15:37 +0000

Someone who wasn’t obsessed with getting drunk.
So… that’s me… and… you’re right, Nobody.

By: Dark

Dark — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 13:13:42 +0000

No, just America.

By: nameless

nameless — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 11:17:06 +0000

in the netherlands you can drink from age 16:D

By: name

name — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 08:01:06 +0000

ppl probably age real quick in stettler